end of the show feels

anonymous asked:

I should be sleeping it's nearly 5am for me, but I'm scrolling through tumblr for some reason. I feel like I'm looking for something but I don't know what I'm looking for. My eyes sting and are swollen from crying early, I cried at the ending a show and continued to cry for some unknown feeling I felt. A lot of unknowns, a lot of forgotten things.

But yet there is so much light to be seen by those tired eyes. There awaits you another beautiful day tomorrow. The past may be blurry, saddening, or painful to think about, but the past is the past. What has happened, has happened. We cannot focus too much on moving backward, for most things cannot be changed. The best thing that we can do is move forward, and run towards our passions. Overcome what’s holding us back from becoming our true self. Certain moments may become confusing, uncertain, and filled with  pain, but we must remember that we have so much beautiful light to shine out into the world. We don’t need to know exactly where we’re going in order to do this; you are who you are regardless. Just keep moving forward, and what you are looking for will come to you in time. Have faith, friend, and please take care of yourself. 

#potterweekprompts2017, day 7: yer a wizard, harry

(on twitter)

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if that’s not a confession of love idk what is

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My rendition of this fic by @destieldrabblesdaily.

You should also definitely click to have better quality.

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She’s been given to her ocean. One day, in its own time, the ocean will give her back.

The Ocean at the End of the Lane, Neil Gaiman

I promise you this, when you find your person you’ll know. Because you find them in every little thing you do and you picture doing everything with that one person. Every song becomes about them, every movie or tv show ends up being relatable to them. You start to feel more than just butterflies in your stomach but you get a feeling in your heart that makes everything feel as if it’ll all be okay. They’re voice is your new favorite sound and they’re eyes are your new favorite color. You can’t get enough of them in a day and you can’t picture anyone else by your side. Whether it’s miles or minutes apart you just know deep down that they are your person. And if you ever find that person, you’d be damned if you ever let them go.
—  Some personal shit

      One of my favourite things about the Orphan Black finale is that, despite the happy ending, Sarah is still not completely alright. She doesn’t have Mrs. S anymore and without the constant life-threatening situations, is scared of things going back to the way they were before she found Beth and stole her identity. The adrenaline has worn off and she no longer knows what to do and fears going back to her old bad habits. She skips out on her high school exam, tries to sell the house, and isolates herself. 

       She sees other people being happy with the lives they could go back to but doesn’t know how to do that and doesn’t want to burden them. And it’s painful to watch but it’s realistic. So often on television we see characters go on traumatic journeys and be perfectly alright once they’re over. We see the credits roll and assume all is well. But that’s not always the case in real life. Trauma follows you sometimes, like a shadow from another room. It’s not all consuming, but it never quite leaves and it wears you down over time. Often to the point where you feel like a hollow shell. You force yourself to be happy for others but quietly resenting them because they don’t understand what you’re going through and you’re too exhausted to reach out to them so you get caught in a vicious, often destructive, cycle. And we see this here with Sarah. Not only that, but we see her start to break out of it as well.

      Sarah has an excellent support network of her sisters. Not only are they there, but they reach out to her. They listen to her, share their stories, help each other. While she always had Felix and Mrs. S, Sarah didn’t really have any good friends and was kind of a drifter. But now she’s more grounded. She has people who she can reach out to and who will always be there for her. And in real life, having a good support network can make an incredible difference in how a person is able to recover from traumatic events and situations. I love this show, all five seasons of it, but those last twenty minutes of Sarah trying to rebuild her life mean more to me than I can put into words right now. Thank you Orphan Black.

In the MBMBAM Seeso Q&A tonight, the brothers talked about how the structure of the show ended up being what it is partially because all the things that they “couldn’t do” because of social anxiety. Like, they couldn’t do man-on-the-street stuff, they couldn’t talk to a ton of strangers, they couldn’t play pranks on people, etc. And the structure of the show ends up feeling very genuine and fun because of those limits? They’re not forcing themselves to do (neurotypical) things they’re not as good at, and in the meantime, working around that stuff begets new ways of doing things. So, like, neurodiverse representation is obviously important because it’s important to be able to see that aspect of yourself in the media you love, but it’s also important because it gives us new structures and kinds of media, and that’s just so exciting to me

Mehcad Brooks story time!

So today I met Mehcad at Heroes and Villains Fan Fest in London. It was hot and everyone was under a glass roof, Melissa and Chris cancelled the day before the event, a lot of people were a bit moody and Mehcad showed up half an hour late to his signing. We were told he had food poisoning, poor guy. 

But boy was he worth the wait. 

As soon as he arrived he changed the mood. He was a ball of light. He hugged everyone he could and kept apologizing for being late, going down the line and giving people hugs and high fives. I had a VIP pass and was the only VIP pass waiting so I was one of the first ones to go and get my autograph and picture.

I told him that as a trans man who is transitioning one of the things I struggled with was finding positive male role models who embodied a positive masculinity, being strong but sensitive and leaving room for women and femininity, and that James represented that for me and was one of the first characters who did. His response was beyond humbled. He thanked me, probably gave me three or four more hugs and told me how much it meant to him to be putting that energy out there, then he asked if he could take a picture with me. I laughed and said that I had bought one, and he said but I want to take it with you on my phone. So we did. He took the pic himself (bless those long arms) then took a couple with my phone as well. He asked if it was ok to share my story and I said of course, that I’m very open and out and proud, and he thanked me because he felt it was so important and he was so floored by it. 

A little later was his panel. Due to the other Supergirl guests cancelling he was alone. From the moment he stepped out he was full of light and energy in spite of having food poisoning. You would never have known. There was a sign language interpreter there and he was trying to learn the things she was signing during his questions, made everyone feel special and welcome, made sure every child that stepped up to ask a question was given a round of applause, and when a girl came up to thank him for what he was doing for the people of Manchester (he’s giving away free autographed 8x10s to anyone from Manchester who sees him this weekend) he asked if she was from there and she said yes, so he said “come up here” and gave her the biggest and longest hug. 

He told some funny stories, and at the very end when someone asked how he feels about the show being political, he said he doesn’t think it is, he thinks it’s about inclusion and hope and light, that it doesn’t matter who you are, a black man can be an iconic comic book character and you can love any gender, and he doesn’t think that’s politics, he just thinks it’s right, and as he was saying it he made contact with me in the audience and smiled and winked at me. It was honestly so touching. 

He was also asked about what he thought of Mon El’s backstory, and he pretended his mic had cut off LMAO. You could tell he was ready to pop off about slavery, but he wanted to keep things light and positive, which was exactly what people needed, to be honest.

Mehcad Brooks, everyone.

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The day they moved in was the best day. It felt like the start of something new. Something good. After everything that had gone so wrong with my life, they walked through that door and they brought possibility. When you look back at your life with a person, sometimes you wonder ‘would we be friends if we met now…or did the path that we went on together lead us to this place?’ Did every triumph or mistake along the way make us fall in love? I think that everything happens for a reason. Love. Life. Even death. I hold on to this place for a reason. And that reason is now.

BEING HUMAN (US) [January 17, 2011 – April 7, 2014]

I believe Spencer’s twin is coming.

In this post I want to give a list of reasons why Twincer is my prime suspect as AD. I know a lot of these ‘clues’ come from interviews, but they’re still really convincing for me at least. I’ve definitely missed some of the clues from within the show because they’re not as easy to spot - we need to know for sure if Twincer is happening, then we can dig further. (The fun won’t instantly stop once the finale airs.) But for now, enjoy these, and at the end, I give my theory as to the motive.

Please note: none of this is overly new. This is just the summation of everything we’ve been talking about on my blog for the past couple months. I wanted to put all the ideas into one post, rather than 31529 mini posts scattered here and there. I will be updating this as we find more. 

  1. The famous airport scene from 715.
    We all already think it’s weird that "Spencer" asked Ezra to not tell anyone he saw her there with Wren. What’s weirder, is the fact that Wren and “Spencer” were arguing. Amongst muffle, I heard Spencer say "stop calling me that" (let me know if you heard differently). Did Wren have a slip-of-the-tongue moment and call her Spencer rather than the twin’s real name?
  2. Dr. Cochran’s story is very telling.
    We all already know the ambiguous implication that Mary had more than two babies, because Dr. Cochran said he dealt with “two of Mary’s babies”. What’s more interesting is the second baby he dealt with. The first baby (Charlotte) he gave to Jessica. He said that the second baby that he delivered was placed in family county services. This could not have been Spencer, since Spencer was delivered to Veronica within 5 minutes of birth. So, who was that second baby that was placed in family services? I believe it was Spencer’s twin. Why? Dr Cochran referred to that second baby as “underweight but tenacious” - lo and behold, the next episode, Toby calls Spencer tenacious. This was the writers foreshadowing the similarities between this second baby, and Spencer. Twins. 
  3. We all know Hanna’s ‘dream’ in 701.
    It makes no sense that Hanna was able to dream ‘Spencer’ saying the name A.D. since Hanna was kidnapped before these initials were even revealed. Perhaps Hanna was visited by Twincer; the one holding her captive.
  4. A.D. needs to stand for something. 
    Spencer’s twin could literally have the initials A.D., since we know she would be Mary Drake’s child. Her first name would start with A and the D would stand for Drake. 
  5. Brendan and Ian both confessed to being confused by the identity of A.D.
    They needed the backstory to understand it. Is that because they had no idea who has the name “Alex Drake” (for example) ?
  6. Tyler said before 7B aired that “you’ve never met AD. You kind of have. You’ll know what I mean”.
    This can be interpreted in two ways: you’ve never met Twincer but since you know Spencer, you kind of know who AD is. Or. You’ve seen Twincer over the years, but thought it was Spencer. Either way, Tyler’s comment screams twin-theory to me. This could apply to any twin theory, but in this context, I’m using it for Spencer.
  7. Ian said (0:57) that “fans will be satisfied to a point. Right when it seems it’s gonna be really great, it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”….
    That cheeky smile on Ian’s face when he said “it seems it’s gonna be really great”… what could be greater than a liar being AD? Ian could be referring to the fact that they initially show us Troian under the hoodie, making us think Spencer is AD. Then, after commercial break, they will reveal it’s just her twin, hence the “it might do a little [downwards hand motion]”. We will be satisfied to a point, he said. It’ll start off amazing by thinking it’s Spencer, oh wait, it’s another twin.
  8. Ashley said (0:14) that she didn’t even know the A.D. reveal is possible.
    Because she did not expect a second pair of twins to come along?
  9. “It’s like there are two of you living in this house. You, and you’re evil twin, and we’re not sure who’s coming down to breakfast". 
    said Veronica to Spencer in 423. Foreshadowing at it’s finest.
  10. Spencer doesn’t remember this flashback.
    Was it her twin? And oh how coincidental, that the writers tell us a time Spencer doesn’t remember, in the same scene Veronica makes the above comment about Spencer’s “evil twin”.
  11. “Where are they?”
    said Mary as she entered the Hastings house (flashback from 717). Who is they? The twins? She proceeded to say that Spencer is the only good thing she’s ever made. Maybe Mary knows Spencer’s twin is evil, and is neglecting her. 
  12. “You look very much like your sister. Almost like twins”.
    said Mary to Spencer in 701. The writers wanted us to think that Mary was talking about Spencer and Melissa, since Mary was holding a picture of the half-sisters. But, were the writers, and therefore Mary, hinting towards Twincer? Is Mary being blackmailed/forced (by Peter?) to keep quiet on Twincer, and she had a slip-of-the-tongue moment here?
  13. Marlene is very aware of the Twincer theories.
    Back in 2014 she said that Troian sent her an online fan theory regarding Spencer having a twin who is A. Marlene was blown away by it and she thought it was a very well thought out plan with detailed evidence across the series. Watch from 1:35. Whilst you may be saying “there’s NO WAY Marlene spoilt her own show’s ending in an interview!!” - I feel like she had no idea the show would go on for 7 seasons, and once they got renewed, she panicked. “Shit, we need a new Uber A. Let’s go with that brilliant fan theory Troian sent me”. She probably regrets making this interview now. You can tell her passion for Twincer in this interview. She talks so damn highly of it.
  14. Marlene has said that the person who plays A.D. had known for a while.
    We know that Marlene told Troian the entire ending of the show years in advance. “Just like I had story time with Marlene, you all now get story time with Pretty Little Liars” said Troian.
  15. The girl in the coffin in the opening has the exact same black puffy shirt as Spencer.
  16. Why does it seem that A.D. is always going after the Hastings?
    Why shoot Spencer, out of all the liars? Why demand Aria to plant the audio device in the Hastings? Why not ruin the Marin household? The jealous twin wants her ungrateful sister dead, hence the shooting, and the jealous daughter is angry she never got adopted. Too much of the story is Hastings-oriented. 
  17. “They’re all some pretty. Good. Theories.”
    Was Janel’s response to being asked about the Spencer-twin theories. (22:20)
  18. And, I’ll just leave this here. Good one @prettylittlesessions​ !
  19. “Spencer’s” weird comments in 718.
    In 718 “Spencer” says to Toby “you know what its like to be the outsider. Removed from friends and family”. What made her say this? Nothing was said or done in 718 to prompt our Spencer to say this. 
  20. Keegan said there are no more Spoby kisses in 7B.
    “I can honestly say that there is not another Spoby kiss.” Yet - there was one in 718. Either Keegan lied, or that was Spencer’s twin. (10:15)
  21. “It’s somebody you have seen.”
    says Marlene in regards to who AD is. Was she talking about the Spoby kiss in 710, which Twincer referred to in 718 when she kissed Toby again? Marlene was very careful to avoid saying “it’s someone you KNOW”. We don't “know” Twincer. But, we have seen her.
  22. “That’s not the Spencer I know”
    said Toby in 718. Writers are foreshadowing.

Setting all this aside, I want to add my theory on the backstory and motive:

  • Twincer, who’s name is A_____ Drake, was born in Radley, as Dr. Cochran told us in 7A. 
  • Twincer was raised in Radley - not because she needed to be at a psychological hospital, but as a form of daycare, because Mary was deemed an unfit mother, and also she kept Twincer a secret from Peter… he already hated her (to the point of planning her murder, later on) enough for having one baby together, imagine Peter’s reaction to having twins.
  • There, Twincer met and bonded with her sister Charlotte. Charlotte became Twincer’s only friend. (Twincer might even be Bethany, since we already know of this bond between Bethany and Charlotte, and how Bethany was drawing Charles being taken away by a monster. But for this theory, let’s just forget Bethany for a second.)
  • When Mona came to Radley and started telling Charlotte about everything she did to her sister, Charlotte and Twincer wanted to play. They wanted a turn at harassing Spencer and her friends.
  • For Charlotte, as we know, it was the feeling of finally succeeding at something in life that made the game her drug. For Twincer, it was something far darker.
  • Harassing Aria, Hanna, Emily and Alison is all about driving a wedge between the girls. Twincer wants to break up the girls. Turn them against each other. Hopefully by throwing fire at the girls, they will break up, ultimately, to ruin Spencer’s life. Again, jealousy. Twincer’s plan is backfiring because it’s exactly A’s threats that makes Spencer say “we need each other more than ever” and “always stick together”. The writers keep making the point of SPENCER being the one to make the comments about “always” sticking together. Twincer cannot break Spencer and her bitches. This is fueling Twincer’s anger. Nothing is working.
  • That’s why AD/Twincer recently shot Spencer. “If I can’t break the girls up to ruin Spencer’s life, why not just become Spencer?” Twincer shot Spencer in an attempt to assume her identity and squeeze her way into the loving friendship group that she could never crack. “These girls are so loyal to each other… they don’t even break up after even my threats. Damn, I want to be a part of this. It’s my turn to live a happy life. You had your turn Spencer.”
  • Note: I do not believe that AD has been operating since season 1. Mona’s time as A is completely independent from Charlotte and Twincer’s story. Mona started the game, and now someone is ending it, and she wants to know who. Charlotte and Twincer are their own duo; their own A-team, which stemmed as a result of Mona coming to Radley. Charlotte revealed herself - next up in the A team is Twincer, who is carrying on the game she once played with her sister. 
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✡ in honor of today being the last day of passover, here is simon talking about one of his family’s seder traditions ✡

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Kolvina + Driving