empowering yourself

If you care about what people think about you, you will end up being their slave. Reject and pull your own rope.
—  Auliq Ice

Try your complete and utmost best with every task that you take on. Even if you don’t get exactly what you were hoping for, you will still come out much farther ahead.

And that is something to be truly proud of.

—  Nicole Addison @thepowerwithin

I’m going to do a series of illustrations to empower fat women and to fight fat phobia, body shaming, and the objectification of the female body.

More to come.


This piece is called “They tried to mess with us…”

♡ relationship dynamics in astrology ♡

Astrology can show some insight on your relationship dynamics with others. The relationships described can either be platonic or romantic, since both types of relationships can run deeply between two people. Be sure to look at other elements of your chart, for this post illustrates the connections between the 7th House and 8th House. If you would like to check your relationships with lovers, check the 5th House. if you would like to check your relationship with friends, check the 11th House. You can gain a further understanding of your relationships with others when you are able to piece these areas together.

If you have two signs ruling the 7th and 8th House, you may find that you can’t disconnect your intimate needs from your one-on-one interactions. This may prove to be very difficult since it is hard to achieve intimacy with another person right away. With that in mind, there is a struggle in maintaining a functional relationship dynamic.

If you have your 7th House intercepted, you can struggle to start one-on-one interactions easily. What you ideally want in your one-on-one interactions can be unstable. If you have your 8th House intercepted, you can struggle to have intimate relationships with others.

7th House ruled by Aries//8th House ruled by Taurus: Your one-on-one interactions with others are generally very passionate and fun. There can be a lot of arguments and fun debates with who you talk to. There is a focus on keeping the relationship spicy, dynamic, and relevant to you. However, with your relationships, you intimately need stability and calmness if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People can leave you once you try to calm down the fiery dynamic of your relationship or can stay to stabilize your relationship with them. People may also try to leave you if you aren’t able to settle down the passion in your relationship and calm the the relationship dynamic down.

7th House ruled by Taurus//8th ruled by Gemini: Your one-on-one interactions with others are generally very slow-paced and steady. There are rarely arguments, and if there are any, they are eliminated immediately to keep things calm. There is a focus on comfort, and you like to keep your relationships in the comfort zone. However, with your relationships, you intimately need constant communication and change if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People can leave you once you try to get out of the comfort zone and communicate more or can stay in your relationship and keep a intelligent conversation. People may also try to leave you if you aren’t able to get out of your comfort zone and open your mind to different opinions.

7th House ruled by Gemini//8th ruled by Cancer: Your one-on-one interactions with others are generally very talkative, intelligent, and fun. There’s a lot of logical communication and learning, and you try your best to keep your emotions out of sight with others. There is a focus on talking and having fun. However, with your relationships, you intimately need a deep, nurturing emotional connections if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People can leave you once you try to move past the logic and delve into their emotions or stay to emotionally understand you. People may also try to leave you if you aren’t able to take their emotions into account and to see that logic doesn’t give you the whole picture.

7th House ruled by Cancer//8th ruled by Leo: Your one-on-one interactions with others are generally very nurturing, emotional, and soft. You are able to express yourself emotionally with others, and you like to focus and help others emotionally. There is a focus on feeling good and gentle with each other. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to feel that you are important and to be validated for your talents if you want your relationship to be significant to you. People can leave you once you try to make yourself feel recognized or stay to validate you for what you do. People may also try to leave you if you don’t directly work to get validation for your talents, because usually, you may try to get such validation passive-aggressively.

7th House ruled by Leo//8th ruled by Virgo: Your one-on-one interactions with others are often fun, creative, and spontaneous. You are able to have fun and be spontaneous with others, and you like to focus on creatively empowering yourself and the people you interact with. There is a focus on yourself. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to realize that instead of solely serving yourself, you need to serve others if you want any of your relationships to be significant. People can leave you once you try to get past your creative endeavors or stay to keep you aligned. People may also leave you if you refuse to acknowledge others and fail to realize that a relationship does not revolve around you.

7th House ruled by Virgo//8th ruled by Libra: Your one-on-one interactions with others are often meticulous, intelligent, and dynamic. You are able to have a nice, comfortable routine with others, and you like to plan and organize the dynamic of your relationships. There is a focus on being punctual and detailed in your one-on-one interactions. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to see the beautiful, rather than efficient way of life if you want your relationships to be significant to you. You may feel unloved or unattractive in your relationships. People may leave you once you try to loosen up and have fun or stay to let you indulge and please you. People may also leave if you refuse to relax and fail to slow down and see the beauty of the world.

7th House ruled by Libra//8th ruled by Scorpio: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very social, charming, and equal. You are able to have a nice, balanced relationship with others, and you like to compromise and please others. There is a focus on keeping things peaceful. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to realize that peace doesn’t last forever and that conflict will inevitably occur if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People may leave you once you openly express your discontent or say to make your relationship stronger due to resolved conflict. People may also leave if you choose to stay passive-aggressive, actively trying to keep your relationship peaceful, but also shallow.

7th House ruled by Scorpio//8th ruled by Sagittarius: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very intimate, deep, and secretive. You are able to have a deep, transformative relationship with others and you like to intimately know others. There is a focus of knowing everything about someone. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to keep your relationships fun, adventurous, and lightly mysterious to you if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People may leave you once you try to lighten up your relationship or stay to keep your relationship fun and light-hearted. People may also leave if you choose to keep your relationship heavy and dark with a pessimistic, suffocating dynamic.

7th House ruled by Sagittarius//8th House ruled by Capricorn: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very fun, adventurous, and light-hearted. You are able to have a humorous, not-so-serious relationship with others and you like to escape responsibilities. There is a focus on not worrying and just having fun. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to implement responsibility and practicality if you want your relationships to be practical to you. People may leave you once you try to take the fun out of your relationships or stay to keep you responsible and grounded. People may also leave if you choose to run away from your problems and responsibilities, ultimately making you an individual that is irresponsible and potentially harmful to others.

7th House ruled by Capricorn//8th House ruled by Aquarius: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very serious, practical and perhaps productive. You are able to have a functional relationships with others and you like to keep your relationships under control. There is a focus on keeping things in line. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to accept sudden changes and excitement if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People may leave you once you try to make your relationships more unpredictable or stay to keep the relationship dynamic exciting. People may also leave if you choose to restrict your relationships to be boring, static, and strongly restricted due to your fear of change.

7th House ruled by Aquarius//8th House ruled by Pisces: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very quirky, weird, and exciting. You are able to have dynamic, unpredictable relationships with others and you like to keep your relationships different and interesting. There is a focus on variety, rationality, and logic. However, with your relationships, you intimately need to be irrationally compassionate with others if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People may leave once you try to become subconsciously and deeply close or stay to establish a truly compassionate relationship with you. People may also leave if you refuse to be to irrational to help others, for refusing can lead to an awkward detachment to others.

7th House ruled by Pisces//8th House ruled by Aries: Your one-on-one interactions with others tend to be very compassionate, creative, and dreamy. You are able to have kind, gently relationships with others and you like to keep your relationships relaxing. There is a focus on keeping things easygoing. However, with your relationships, you intimately need things to be straightforward, direct, and conflicting if you want your relationships to be significant to you. People may leave once you try to start needed arguments or stay to strengthen your relationships through helpful confrontations. People may also leave if you refuse to be clear, for being unclear can result in a lot of confusion and passive-aggression between each other.

Reclamation

If you, as a gay man, think it’s empowering to call yourself a faggot, then fine.

If you, however, then decide to start labelling me a faggot then you can fuck right off. To me, the term faggot is not empowering, it is a slur. It is, to be quite frank, the most offensive term a person could call me.

And this goes for any ‘reclaimed’ slur. If you call me queer after I’ve told you not to, then you can fuck right off too.

I am gay. I am homosexual. I am a gay/homosexual man. This is what I want to be described as. Do not try and force labels onto me that I don’t want.

Reclamation is a deeply personal thing. ‘Groups’ don’t reclaim slurs, individual people do. Lesbians as a whole haven’t reclaimed the d-slur, some just feel comfortable using it. If you do feel comfortable using reclaimed slurs to describe yourself, fantastic! But don’t you dare try to force them onto other people. To do so is disrespectful and disgusting.

Bonus, if you use those slurs to describe someone from that group, but are not actually from that group yourself (i.e. straight person thinking it’s okay to say ‘the fags’), then congratulations you’re just a fuckwit!

Claiming queer isn’t a slur is anti-revolutionary and go against the liberation of LGBT people.

When you claim queer isn’t a slur, you’re taking away all the power of slur reclamation. Reclaiming a slur is stripping your oppressor of their weapon, it’s using their words against them. It so when they call you a dirty queer, you can answer, “Yes, I’m a queer, so what?”

When you claim queer isn’t a slur, you’re making people who would benefit of slur reclamation uncomfortable with it. You’re taking away their way of fighting back, and exclude them from the community.

“My identity isn’t a slur!”, fine, then don’t identify with a slur. Don’t minimize our activism just to empower yourself, that’s selfish.