Ian and Emotional Suppression or Why Ian Hasn't Said “I Love You”
Most of the Ian posts I’ve been seeing
lately are either that Ian is an abusive asshole who doesn’t deserve
Mickey or that Ian is a pure cinnamon roll who has never done
anything wrong and tearing down Mickey….
But here’s the thing, both of those
things are wrong.
I’ve been making a lot of Ian posts lately but the
thing is I feel like, this is a character that I loved and he is
either being ripped to shreds or people are ignoring his faults. You can love a character with out blanking out or
rationalizing all of the shit they have done and without demonizing another character. You can also be sad and
pissed off about what happened to Mickey while not making a character
into an abusive dick face.
Anyways, one big things on the “Ian is
an asshole” side is that he has never said “I love you” to Mickey
and I thought I might give my own opinion on the matter.
Still Mickey Milkovich, but not because he’s an actual murderer, just because I love him and he needs protection, but he doesn’t really have it and there’s nothing I can do to make Ian Gallagher stay with him.
This moment…the ‘Sorry I’m late’ gets me every time. And Mickey’s tender hand on Ian’s face and Ian exhaling… It was perfect and this song is so perfect for them. It fits them so well! These two make so much sense, together it feels like they make each other better, especially in the shitty situation they are constantly surrounded in. And when Ian finds out how messed up his head is and it is going to be for life. He is reaching out to Mickey. Ugh…both boys are so in love and constantly want to take care of each other. They are gonna be an emotional death of me (Fucking writers that are ruining them and their characters).
Ok so let me imagine that mickey gets a nice tan. He learns to swim. And surf?? He takes up fishing because it relaxes him. He learns Spanish. He gets a nice job. Sometimes he thinks of Ian, but it stops hurting after a while. Just let mickey be happy in Mexico.
Can we please talk about Ian’s expressions in the last scene? The way he turns to look at Mickey and you can tell he’s tensed and scared Mickey has come to end it. And when Mickey says “I’m sorry I’m late” Ian visibly relaxes and the relief in his eyes is a thing to behold. The way when Mickey puts his hand on Ian’s face and kisses his forehead, Ian looks so incredibly thankful that the man he loves still loves him. The way his eyes closed and his eyebrows scrunch up in concentration when Mickey kisses him. He was so scared that it really was over. The way he holds Mickey’s wrist, anchoring Mickey to him.
Ian turns so he’s facing Mickey fully, the skin of their foreheads never breaking contact. The bed is tiny, so he pulls him in closer by his waist so he doesn’t fall off. “Because I can,” Ian responds.
Mickey presses his thumb into Ian’s forearm, draws an imaginary line connecting the dots. His freckles were always his favorite focal point, especially when words were hard to find.
“No, really,” Mickey counters as he gently drags his thumb across his skin.
Ian smiles. There’s thousands of reasons why he’s looking at him like the world ends and begins with the blue of his eyes. The ocean is in them anyway. There’s countless explanations, one being his touch, another because he’s just here - next to him. But only one reason matters, and it stands out like hearing his name in a crowded room.
“I finally listened to your voice mails Mick,” Ian reveals. Mickey’s eyes grow wide, the light of the room bouncing off of them like azure glass. His breathing stutters, but Ian steadies it, easily. “I love you too,” he says.
And little does he know it’s the first time anyone has ever said it to Mickey.
When Mickey finds out about Ian’s cheating… And Ian is confronted about it. I want shouting. I want tears. I want Ian begging for forgiveness, hear him say how sorry he is. I want heart break. I want pain. I want it to be amazing and emotional. I want it to be powerful. Bring on the emotional Ian/Mickey moments. Gimme.