We took it too seriously,” she said. “We were making plans for twenty years in the future when both of us knew this wouldn’t last.

"He said he was going to marry me. We were going to travel the world and live in an apartment with great glass windows and three cats.

"Oh and I knew it was a cliché but it was so addicting to think about. And I admit there were times I believed it might actually happen.”

—  S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #169
Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. Those who are at times described as being a ‘hot mess’ or having ‘too many issues’ are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.
—  Anthon St. Maarten

People who think that our morality is all about big grand principles rather than emotions should try playing a video game. Most people I’ve talked to about this have a hard time with things like killing “innocent” people in games, and feel compelled to do “good” things in the game. I certainly do. I recognize that this is fundamentally irrational, but it’s also a really useful reminder that my sense of right and wrong probably comes from my automatic emotional responses to things, and if those responses aren’t in accordance with my higher-order values, I’ll have to intentionally work on that.

Honesty is against the policy.

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Examine your triggers, the specific thoughts, actions, sights or events that set off an emotion. It’s easy to believe that triggers ‘cause’ the emotion, but the truth is a bit more complicated. We might feel that wild rush of jealousy when we see our partner kiss another person, but that doesn’t mean the kiss itself is a root cause. Instead, it’s more accurate to say that the kiss is the switch that turns on a complicated chain of emotions that brings us nose to claw with some internal beast—a fear of being replaced, maybe, or a sense of territoriality. The kiss might be the trigger, but the cause is something else—some inner insecurity, stirred from its slumber.

This chain reaction is why restrictions on specific actions or behaviors rarely do much to alleviate jealousy. The beast still lies there, waiting for some other poke or prod to awaken it. At some point, if we are to be free of jealousy, we have to confront the monster directly. That means digging deep to uncover and deal with the internal things—the wobbles in our sense of worthiness, the little fears that try to convince us we will be abandoned.
—  Franklin Veaux & Eve Rickert, More Than Two