The worst is when there are so many thoughts and feelings in your head and you want to express them but it’s all so hard to put into words so instead you start a sentence and then go straight into the next one without finishing the first because after all that’s how it sounds in your mind.
even hard to put into words, how much you mean to me
how can I describe my sadness about losing you?
When I can’t find a single word that would do justice to your value
how am I supposed to express my emotions of missing you?
so many things that come to my mind, when I think about our past.
Memories of laughter we shared.
Late night talks and walks.
Inside jokes that will never be told again.
I don’t know where to begin with.
I don’t even know what I miss the most about you.
Is it the feeling of safety you gave me?
Is it your shoulder you offered me to lean on?
Or is it something else?
Something so gracefully I can’t even understand?
Something that took my air to breath when you walked away.
Something that I never thought would leave me so empty.
my head when I go to sleep.
You’re the first one I think about in the morning.
You’re the one, they sing about on the radio.
You’re the one that crosses my mind way too often.
sunshine that’s now covered by clouds.
The sunshine I always admired.
The sunshine I couldn’t wait for to come out every day.
But now you’re so far away, almost unreachable.
seem darker now with clouds in between us.
It rains more often.
I cover myself in layers of coats.
I make myself invisible.
Lost with my thoughts.
I wish you’d be here.
Here to talk.
it feel the same?
Talking to you, after our paths have parted.
Filled with sincerity and trust?
I fear I’ll never find out.
I can’t stop thinking about you ever since the party a couple weeks ago. I’ve had a thing for you from the moment we met, but you were a friend of a friend. I knew better than to expect anything to come of it, so I settled at being your friend. But I’ve been seeing you more than usual and I’ve realized that I like being with you. You make me laugh with your bad jokes. You’re funny, but not bonkers. You’re shy sometimes, but confident other times. You’re unique and you have lovely eyes. I find myself wanting to be around you more, so I’ve been making efforts to do so. I’ve liked being around you from the night I met you. You stood out from the crowd that night and you have at every dance since. I still don’t know why and I don’t know what it is I feel for you. I do know that I want to get to know you and see where this goes. I don’t want this to be a mistake. You’re my friend after all. I hear falling for your friend is a messy business, but I’m willing to take that risk. I feel like it’s time to finally figure out why I feel weak whenever you look at me.
// 11:23 // This will either be a horrible mistake or a miracle