emotional muse is emotional


Send me one and I’ll tell you about my muse when they’re…


“I know they talk like you’re too naive… (like) you’re too young but eventually, fools change the world. I believe that.” - #RM 2017

[V+ Chat] 170310 Kim Namjoon

I’m emotional, coz just the other night I was ranting about how the other generations sign us off as ridiculous, petulant, and entitled for dreaming big dreams and believing in what we deserve.

Try til you can fly! If you crash and learn what limits you, fight it. Shout not today to the nay sayers! Once upon a time no person could fly. Then some dreamers invented planes and made flying a reality. Who’s to say that you wouldn’t be able to create a way to make your dream of soaring become a reality too?

Namjoon believes in passionate fools. You should too. Be passionate, be driven, keep trying!

Dream, Hope, Keep Going!

There is so much anger in me
fury ripping like cannons
through tissue and bone and time
it’s poison, I know it
I can feel it dripping into my organs
burning and killing with acid necrotic
where do I put it so it won’t eat away
everything I am from the inside out?
I’m so afraid I’ll just erupt into flames
the second someone lights a match
to light the way
—  I’ll burn like a torch if I can’t spit this out /.w.m.w.
2018: Rise of the TMNT

Looks like we’re getting a new cartoon earlier than I thought. Nickelodeon is gonna launch “Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” (working title) in autumn 2018. 2D animation, mystical elements, probably will blend the humor of the 2003 series and the 2012 series.

So this means all new fanfiction and all new headcanon. We get to start over.

So, I started in the fandom when I was nine years old in 1988. I’ll most likely stay in the fandom when I’m postmenopausal. I’ll read forum posts by teenagers and adolescents who will still complain about other fans complaining, and I will totally resist the urge to giggle and say shit like “When I was your age we only had mailing lists and there was no social media! But we still yelled at each other over shipping.”

Like, will they even know what Mirage is? Will they remember the great Capritello fan fights? The Shiniangelo Saga according to Greg Cipes and Gwendoline Yeo? The Battle Nexus championship? The battles over why Leonardo always kills the Shredder? The debate over the cartoons being “for kids” even as the original comics were for adults? Which version of Michelangelo was the least stupid? Whether or not Donatello had a personalized stress relief outlet nobody ever saw? Whether or not there will always be a Klunk?

I’ll still be here.

ok but that line where tara goes “even when i’m at my worst, you always make me feel special. how do you do that?” and willow’s response is “magic” always devastates me so much because i know that tara’s going to look back on that and wonder if she can trust any of her time with willow. because the girl tara loved was soft and sweet and trustworthy and made tara feel like she could trust again, and if tara was so profoundly wrong about willow now, was she wrong about willow always??

which is why it always cuts me up inside to see willow manipulate tara’s mind because tara’s been messed with before. glory. tara’s probably got memories of confusion and fear and feeling lost and alone and willow was her comfort then, and now she’s finding out that the one person she thought was the first to understand her and the person she let herself be herself with is the person who’s betrayed her the most completely

You wanted me all to yourself. You wanted to own me. When I tried to live my life, you tightened your chokehold on it. Living for anyone but you was wrong. Trying to please anyone but you was wrong. So I didn’t, I tried to be right according to what you wanted. I told you where I was going and if you didn’t want me going I didn’t go. Out of fear, I poured all of my love into you until I was empty. When I had nothing left to pour, I carved out the insides of my heart to satisfy you. I gave you all of me, yet always felt like I was never enough. I was a helpless bird that knew about life outside of the cage but was taught not to want it. I was taught that it was wrong, but in the end, it wasn’t wrong. You were.
—  Maxwell Diawuoh, Request: A girl breaks up with her girlfriend due to being isolated by the relationship and fear from saying/doing something—anything “wrong” such as hanging out with a friend or forgetting to tell them they’re going to a store. And the feeling of never being enough and feeling helpless/hopeless.
She is on her knees, begging him to let her go.
He’s clenching so tightly on her heart, refusing to let the love of his life get away.

a personal mix of sorts, about my dysfunctional and abusive childhood. [EDIT - CHANGED AND REMOVED TRACKS]

track list:

1. emilie autumn / i want my innocence back

2. metric / youth without youth

3. smashing satellites / waterfall

4. melanie martinez / dollhouse

5. muse / dead inside

6. mother mother / happy

7. the cranberries / fee fi fo

8. nine inch nails / the day the world went away

9. of monsters and men / organs

10. the fray / little house

11. metric / blindness

12. three days grace / just like you

13. shinedown / burning bright

listen here


But he has always been so good at leaving them helpless and heartbroken ; begging to be taken back.

This week is mainly emotional in nature, asking us to focus on our entire being and start bringing it into wholeness. TLDR at the bottom.

Current Situation: With the sun we feel safe, we feel ready for growth, we feel ready for a more easeful experience. We can feel childlike again, playful, open. There may be a newfound connection to your inner self, one that you haven’t felt in a while. This is beautiful energy for creativity, for beauty, and for connection. Overall, I’d say we are in a great place this week to start moving through personal blocks that may have been holding us back in recent months. The sun shines it’s light indiscriminately which is part of its’ beauty. It has the ability to grow plants, warm the earth, and even generate electricity – but it also has a quality of showing us all that has been hidden from sight in the darker months of the year. This of course is a metaphor for our lives in this Tarot reading. While we find ourselves in this more optimistic and energetic position, we’re also asked to be like the sun and reveal our true nature. To allow us to stand naked emotionally with ourselves, allowing us to come into closer connection to our inner selves, thus bringing us closer to those around us.

Obstacle: Which is where our challenge lies this week. The Tarot is asking that we look at *all* of who we are – including the parts that may not feel so great. Are we being completely honest with ourselves about where we need to be on our path? Are there some “dark” qualities that just need to be brought into the light and cared for? Nothing ever goes away by pushing it down. By honoring those parts of ourselves that feel dirty, dark, or disconnected we actually find their usefulness, their message. When we ignore certain parts of our personality or emotions we actually end up making them stronger, forcing them to act out in larger ways. Everything in our experience is here to teach us something or carries with it a message. We’re not here to judge or ignore the messenger, but to stop and listen to it and understand what it has to say. Then we can integrate the lessons, come into harmony with ourselves, and not feel that distant coldness of being lost or alone.

Advice: The King of Cups makes this spread very clearly about our emotional state right now. He’s asking that we sit as a witness to the stormy seas of our inner worlds. He knows that his throne will survive them. He has seen rough waters before and knows they do not last. He has seen calm waters before and knows they, too, do not last. Because he is a cups card he is very closely linked to the emotional and spiritual world. He understands that the full range of experience is what he’s come here to do. Through his awareness he has cultivated an ability to conquer these seas and to rule over his kingdom with care. If he did not observe and learn how to navigate the various waters he may encounter, at the slightest wave of the ocean he might topple and drown. He’s asking us to respect the human experience, to watch it closely, allowing our emotions and small, inner knowings to be our guide. Through this we can enjoy the ride, surfing the waves instead of being pulled down unto the dark waters.

TL;DR: You have the inner strength necessary to do the work of looking in your darkest corners. In doing this you will become a stronger, more integrated human, much more capable of ruling your destiny instead of letting other forces rule you.

If you’d like to dive deeper into your unique circumstances reach out to me to schedule a personal reading.