Chapter 3

American Horror Story - (2016)

American Horror Story - Hotel (2015)

American Horror Story - Freak Show (2014)

American Horror Story - Coven (2013)

American Horror Story - Asylum (2012)

American Horror Story - Murder House (2011)

Dating Chris Evans would include:

  • Having dogs 
  • Having kids
  • Rescuing dogs
  • Naming kids and dogs after Disney characters
  • Disney movie marathons in pj’s
  • Going to Disneyland very often
  • Gucci gifts
  • Intense sex. Lots of riding him and going down on him.
  • Lots of standing up sex positions so he’ll carry you
  • Hosting Monday night football, which would consist of having a bunch of his friends over, lots of snacks, and beer.
  • Him ordering pizza while watching a Patriots game
  • Yelling and cursing at the TV when the Patriots mess up
  • “It’s just a game, Chris. You need to calm down and stop breaking stuff”.
  • Him getting royally pissed when you diss Tom Brady. (Even if you’re just kidding)
  • “I don’t wike it”
  • Roaring laughter
  • Him playing the piano or the ukulele and singing goofy
  • Attending football games
  • BBQs once a month or every few with his family.
  • Scott trying to embarrass him in front of you.
  • “What did you see in him? He’s not the brightest.” -Scott teasing.
  • Going shopping with his sisters.
  • His nieces and nephews calling you “Aunt”
  • Pretending to be Steve Rogers when you curse
  • Pretending to be Captain America around your kids
  • Playing with his shield
  • Visiting Scarlet J, and her offering you a piece of cake or some of the cookies she just baked
  • Hanging out with Anna Faris and Chris Pratt
  • Dinners at/with Sebastian Stan
  • Double dates with Sebastian or plain third wheeling.
  • Comforting him when he’s anxious
  • Walking your dogs together
  • The media not knowing anything about your relationship, just that the two of you are together but rarely get papped
  • Spending quality time with you. Just the two of you
  • Leaving parties early to go home and fuck
  • Him suddenly throwing you over his shoulder to take you to his bedroom. (He’ll definitely spank you while he’s at it)
  • Literal boob grab
  • You falling asleep on the couch and waking up in bed
  • Him sleeping in nothing but boxer briefs
  • Waking up with his strong arm around you
  • Attending Marvel premieres and cons
  • Sebastian Stan, RDJ, and Scarlet J, attending your wedding
  • Being “Mrs.Captain America”

“Muggles are so weird,” Sirius stated, looking around the room packed with people scowling at each other.

“Why’s that?” Lily asked, stepping in forward in the security line.

“I mean, they travel by packing themselves into a large metal blob that gets flung into the air. It’s not natural.”

Lily raised an eyebrow, “And traveling by broom or through the fireplace is?”

“Yes,” Sirius answered back immediately, pleased when James said yes with him.

Rolling her eyes, Lily chose to ignore them and instead pointed forward.

“See these?” She asked.

The boys nodded yes, signaling for her to continue. 

“You’re suppose to put your bag onto the belt and it goes through the scanner.”

“Why?” Sirius asked.

“It’s for security purposes.” She replied.

“Why?” he asked again.

“To make sure no one is carrying something in their bag they’re not supposed to be bringing onto the plane.” 


“Because - oh stop that!” she smacked Sirius on the arm, scowling as his snickering.

“Now,” she continued, “I’m going to go over to this one right here, because it’s open. You two go to that one over there. When you’re through, we’ll meet on the other side and continue to our plane.”

“Yes ma’am!” James answered dutifully with a goofy smile.

Lily answered back with a happy smile and bounced off.

Taking deep breaths as though they were about to face something terrible, the boys stepped forward to the place Lily instructed them to go and lifted their bags onto the black belt.

Sirius looked up at the sign and snorted, “Hey, look: Baggage Scan. Bet we’d see all sorts of baggage you’re carrying.”

James rolled his eyes, “Not nearly as much as you.”

“Oh really?” Sirius asked in challenge, “What about Tiffany?”

Rising to the challenge, James responded, “What about Jennifer? Or Abagail? Or Marlene? Or Sandra? Or Tyler? Or - “

“Okay, fine, you’ve made your point,” Sirius cut in, “Just - hop onto the belt.”


“Hop onto the belt.” Sirius repeated.

“I can’t hop onto the belt. Lily will kill me!” James insisted.

“Just do it.”


“C’mon - “

“I can’t just - “

“It’ll be so funny - “

“Why don’t you - “

“Just do it - “

“But - “

“Please - “

“Ugh! Fine.” James said finally looking around to make sure no one was watching.

When he was sure he was clear, he lifted his leg up and hoisted himself onto the belt.

“Lie flat on your back,” Sirius said, pushing him down all the way.

“You want me to actually go through it?” James asked.

“Yeah, it’ll be so cool.”

Thinking about it for a moment, James nodded in agreement, “Okay.”

The was already up through to his knees when a security guard stopped them. 

After an hour of interrogation, lots of insisting from Lily that this was their first time flying and they were a bunch of idiots, and a missed flight - the group decided to use the floo network.