emma is so good with words

TDA Characters + Swearing


  • since he had to raise 4 children, you won’t hear him swear
  • he curses a lot in his head though
  • he’s the “watch your language" type of person
  • at times, he almost loses it with zara
  • he has so much bottled up rage because of zara


  • oh boy, does she swear
  • she curses like a sailor
  • very colourful language during missions
  • swears throughout entire battles against demons
  • she tries her best not to swear around Tavvy and Dru
  • but during training her mind is on focused on Cortana and not her mouth
  • zara opens her mouth 
  • emma: “eugh, please just shut the fuck up”


  • not too bad
  • only swears at appropriate times
  • “FUCK” when she gets jump scared by demons on missions
  • “oh! shit.” when she drops something


  • doesn’t swear that often 
  • might slip in the odd “asshole”
  • “damnit” or “crap” when he drops his armful of books
  • you know you fucked up when he starts using actual swearwords when he’s mad at you


  • swears to show that she isn’t a child 
  • she hates it when people stop swearing as she enters the room
  • learns words from emma
  • tends to use them a lot when watching an extra scary horror movie


  • toilet talk
  • please stop tavvy
  • it’s not funny


  • just as bad as emma
  • actually no, he’s even worse than emma because he doesn’t care who hears him
  • his father never cared about what he said so it’s just a habit
  • he’ll only chill if ty starts looking uncomfortable
  • only for ty though
  • he, also, picks up words used by emma 
  • abrupt “FUCK off!” or “Fuck you!” when he’s angry at somebody that make everyone jump
  • when he’s not being sarcastic, he’s swearing


  • what does “fuck” mean?
  • gets super confused when somebody swears at him


  • he used to swear a lot before Faerie
  • but by now he’s forgotten most of his inappropriate vocab. 
  • at times, he will make a rude gesture
  • but "by the angel” is good enough for him
  • he likes to insult people by using demon names
  • “you remind me of a behemoth, you know?”
  • “you are as dumb as a dahak”

I have this random headcanon about the Captain Swan wedding, ok.

So Emma and Killian make up yadda yadda, the engagement is back on, and he has a long lovely talk with Charming to make amends and all is right in the Charming-Jones world. 

They get married and everyone (read: me) cries and it’s beautiful and wonderful and True Love Forever.

But then it’s the wedding reception. And while Killian and Emma and her family are all fine, whispers still persist following the drama that happened around the engagement and Killian’s disappearance. Gossip quietly tinges the party with the “well I heard he left her” and “no no no she kicked him out” and “well he killed her grandfather, I can’t believe David and Snow allowed this to happen” etc etc etc. 

And it’s probably someone like fucking Grumpy running his dumb mouth after too many beers when all of the sudden


A fork jabs down, perfectly in between his fingers that rest on top of the table. 

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Faking It

Summary: Killian Jones had just been joking when he’d told Emma Swan they were actually married. But in his defense, the doctors hadn’t mentioned that her concussion had given her amnesia.
Rating: T
Notes: Happy birthday, @lifeinahole27​! You are an amazing friend, and I’m so happy to have you in my life! I hope you like this story! Thanks to @optomisticgirl for the beta-read!


Based on the prompt: "You’re my best friend who’s just waking up from a concussion, I played a trick on you and said we were married and you have amnesia … but you just rolled with it and now I don’t know what to do.“

Killian had never been so terrified in his whole life. He’d known something like this would happen eventually, he’d warned her countless times, he’d made sure to have a plan in place. And yet when it finally happened, he felt entirely blindsided and paralyzed with fear.

Emma Swan was in the hospital.

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It just makes sense

It’s not something new. Actors who have chemistry are a good investment. We have already seen it  Emma Stone and Ryan Reynolds, Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper, Simon Pegg and Nick Frost and so on and so on

There can be no denying that Katie McGrath and Melissa Benoist have chemistry so why not invest in it? It’s a very simple and very profitable idea. Do a D.E.B.S remake with Katie McGrath as Lucy Diamond and Melissa Benoist as Amy.

Katie and Melissa are known but not yet A-Listers so they affordable. They already have a viral fanbase who will spread the word and do millions in free publicity  the first D.E.B.S movie is a cult so the remake will come with a built in audience….

It’s literally the perfect investment for any company. So @netflix   please consider it. You couldn’t get a more sure bet then this

anonymous asked:

I'm feeling so sad right now and I keep crying. Emma Swan is the best character I've even know. I love your fics but I need more so I was hoping you could rec me some of your favorite, long captain swan fics. Thanks, I hope you feel better soon.

I could go on for hours about how much I love Emma Swan and how devastated I am but I’m sure that’s not what you’re here for so yay!! fic recs!!!!

First of all, if you haven’t read Light of All Lights by @ripplestitchskein , what are you doing w your life?? It’s Dark Swan and Deckhand Hook and it’s so beautifully heartbreaking and so wonderfully smutty and so gloriously glorious. Seriously, it is one of the best works of fiction (fan or other) I have ever read so do yourself a favor and read it. 107k words. Rated E

This next one might be my all-time favorite CS fic. I’m like a puzzle (but all of my pieces are jagged) by @somanyfandomssolittletime. A friends to lovers hockey AU w an integrated NHL. This one’s a little bittersweet for me rn because the Blues just got knocked out of the playoffs. I’ve read this one more times than I can count. It’s a blessing and I’m actually about to go read it again. 18k words. Rated M

Harbor in the Temptest by @acrobat-elle is a Neverland canon divergence and who doesn’t love a good Neverland fic? This one’s a bit of an emotional doozy, let me tell ya, but it is so so worth it. 18k words. Rated T also by @acrobat-elle Breathless a post-Underworld fic in which Emma and Killian come back sharing more than just a heart. Idk what’s more intense the feelings or the smut. 31k words. Rated E

Love, Kindness, and Other Useless Things by @joneskillian is a thing of beauty. A historical AU set in 1815 and the slowest of burns. Emma works for Killian, taking care of his lovely daughter Grace. This one’s a wip and it’s like the highlight of my day when I get the notification saying it’s been updated.

Talking Body by @killians-dimples is another fic that I’ve read too many times. Rockstar AU, guitar player Killian Jones is in love w his media agent Emma Swan. BED SHARING!! and dry humping, god bless. Her writing is a breath of fresh air and I guarantee you will be satisfied and your spirits will be lifted upon reading any of her fics. 10k words. Rated M

@nowforruin is a multi-chapter Goddess. She has written soooo many of my favorite AUs. I honestly don’t know where this fandom would be w out her fics. To name a few of my favorites, Dropping Anchor a broke, both in heart and finances, Emma returns home. Her mother gets her a job working for the Jones’. 37k words. Not Rated. The Trouble With Faking It A fake dating AU and by golly is it beautiful. Emma is hired by Regina to date Movie Star Killian Jones to clean up his image and help him land a role. 124k words (YEAH BUDDY) Rated E. A Change in Wind I can’t even form words for how great this baby is so just read it. 65k words. Rated M.

Lonely Hearts Club by @niniadepapa. If you want to read something just absolutely adorable and lovely, an AU in which Killian starts conversing with a random stranger through messages written on a table at Granny’s. Two guesses as to who the stranger is. 16k words. Rated T

Strangeness & Charm by @bluestoplights. OK first of all, I just wanna give this girl a shout out because back in the day when I was still a mostly Hunger Games blog, I watched OUAT but didn’t blog about it, and I followed her for Veronica Mars and it was basically her Captain Swan blogging that made me want to join this fandom so kudos to you for giving me the love of my life. This fic is probably the longest on this list and every single moment of it is spectacular. Pirate Captain Killian Jones and Savior Emma Swan unite to liberate the kingdom. 243k words. Rated M. Also, give her 1989 fics a try, Wonderland is probably my fave.

Something About December by @high-seas-swan is a 12 Days of Christmas fic in which Killian gifts Emma something new every day leading up to Christmas. And it has a bunch of flashbacks throughout their relationship. Beautifully fluffy, A+ and I’m not just saying this because it was my CSSS gift from her. 7k words. Rated T.

Lastly for this list, Her Crowning Glory by @captainnagata a Princess Diariesish AU in which Emma Swan has to find a husband or else lose her crown to Killian Jones. Beautifully written and tons of fun. 66k words. Rated T.

I just want to thank every person on the list for bringing such beautiful content to such a beautiful fandom. Shipping Captain Swan would not be the same w out you guys. ♥

The Joker x Reader- “What You Wish For”

He always blurs out things when he’s mad and takes it out on the wrong people. If he wants you and your daughter to be gone, why not grant his wish? After all, the great Joker doesn’t need anybody around.

“…and you two are always around, I wish you would just disappear!” J grumbles, irritated that his plans for last night’s kidnapping went downhill. Of course he has to take it on somebody and since you and your daughter happen to be right there…again…

“Hey, knock it out!” you urge him, noticing Emma squeezing harder on her teddy bear. She keeps on looking at you and her dad, uneasy. “That would be enough, don’t say things like this in front of our kid!” you frown, stopping what you’re doing for the moment, which is folding her little dresses.

“I mean it, I want you two to vanish! You are in my way, I want to be alone! I need peace and quiet,” he snarls, pacing around the living room, pointing his finger at Emma.

“Where…where should I go, daddy?” she whimpers, backing out a bit.

“I don’t give a damn, just get out of my sight!” The Joker replies, going out on the balcony.

“Are you serious?!” you mutter, not believing what just came out of his mouth. Emma starts crying and you have to go and hug her, trying to comfort a child that doesn’t understand her father’s outbursts. “Daddy didn’t mean it, honey, ok? He’s just upset. Go get ready for bed and I’ll come tuck you in. Stop crying, he didn’t mean it,” you wipe her tears, feeling your heart sink.

“D-does daddy h-hate me?” she stutters in your ear, sniffling.

“No, of course not, never! He can’t hate his little Pumpkin, there’s no way,” you smile, reassuring her, caressing her back to make it better. “Come on, go get ready, I’ll be right there,” and you put her down, watching as she slowly heads towards her bedroom. You deeply inhale and follow J on the balcony, determined to make things right.

He is sitting on the couch, fidgeting with his gun. You stomp towards him and yank the pistol out of his hand, tossing it on the concrete.

“Don’t say mean things to your daughter, do you hear me? She’s not even 6 yet!”
“Get lost, Y/N!” he growls, pushing you away.

“No, I’m not getting lost!” you place yourself in front of him again. “You made her cry, are you happy about that? All that she knows is that you’re her dad and she loves you, she doesn’t grasp your … complicated behavior,” you make it sound as nice as you can since you want to strangle him on the spot.

“Shut up, Y/N!” J reaches for his gun but you take his hand and hold it in place.

“No, you have to go and make it up to her; you shouldn’t say such horrible things to Emma! I don’t care you are in a foul mood, deal with it!” you snap at him, annoyed. You let go of his hand and lift his chin up, forcing him to look at you since he’s avoiding your gaze.

“Is she…really crying?” he sighs, biting on his cheek. The bitter expression on your face confirms it. The Joker grunts, suddenly relaxing his shoulders and unexpectedly burying his face on your tummy. “I didn’t mean it…” you hear his muffled voice and you kick his shin, distancing from him.

“What would you do without us, hm? Don’t take us for granted!” and you turn your back, storming inside, not waiting for an answer. It won’t be a nice one anyway.


The Joker gets inside Emma’s room, watching her play with the toys before bedtime.

“What are you doing, little Princess?” he asks, scratching his head because he doesn’t really know how to handle the situation.

“Waiting for mommy to put me to bed,” she answers getting up from the carpet, a bit startled, squeezing on her teddy bear.

“Wanna fix my hair?” J offers, fully aware that’s her favorite thing to do.

“Really?” she gasps, already searching for the comb, so excited for the opportunity. Children have such a way of being resilient.

He seats on the floor with the back against her bed. She crawls behind him and carefully starts combing his green hair, tracing the strands with her tiny hand.

“Ahhh, that feels good, Pumpkin Pie,” he purrs, closing his eyes. “You’re doing a great job. Can you purr for me?”

She leans over and makes some silly sounds, trying so hard to imitate him and J chuckles, grabbing both of her hands and covering them in kisses.

“I don’t want you to go away, alright?” J tils his head backwards, watching her giggle when he tickles her sides.

“Ok, daddy,” she kisses his Damaged tattoo and he senses that weird ache in his chest again. It’s a strange type of pain The Joker can never quite pinpoint.

You stop in the doorway, leaning against the wall and watch them, pleased your daughter looks happy now.

“Time for bed, honey,” you announce but let him tuck her in. “Did you do daddy’s hair? It looks great,” you praise her, kissing her goodnight and Emma nods a yes, thrilled you like it.

The Joker leans over to cover her with the blanket and kisses the tip of her nose. Emma locks her hands around his neck and pulls him down so she can hug him.

“I love you, daddy,” she snickers, waiting for him to say it back.

“Me too,” J shortly replies, attempting to get out of it.

“No, daddy, you have to say it!” your daughter whines and it makes you so proud.

Good girl, you think. You’re the one that taught her to make J say the words because he needs to: a reminder never hurts.

“I did,” he cheats, trying to trick her.

“No, you have to saaaaay it,” she cups his face, waiting.

“You sound like your mom, you know that?” he scoffs, rolling his eyes. “Fine, I love you too; are we done here?” J mumbles, kissing her one more time and letting go.

“Yes, daddy, we’re done,” she snatches her teddy bear from you and widely smiles when you wink at her, approving the strategy you worked on so hard. She’s not your kid for nothing.


J watches you change for bed and you glance at him, not being in the mood to talk anymore. He doesn’t say a word either so you just turn off the light and go on your side of the bed, knowing you will fall asleep soon because you are tired.

“Say, Kitten, are you going with me tomorrow? I need you for the heist,” he starts the conversation.

“Maybe,” you yawn, punching your pillow to make it more comfortable.

“You know, I really wanted to…”

You fakely snore, louder and louder, interrupting, hinting he should stop talking.

“Very funny, Baby Doll. You’re hilarious,” he mocks you, finding it hard to stay awake. “Do you still love me?” J sarcastically inquires and he distinguishes your fingers in the dim night light, showing just a small gap between the thumb and index. “That’s it?!”

“Yeap, already too much” your answer promptly comes and you get under the sheets, not wanting to continue the dialogue. “I’m exhausted.”

He wants to say something harsh but ends up babbling stuff to himself as you ignore his behavior.


“We’re going to the park and then for a drive. I’ll be back in time,” you little note on the kitchen table lets J know of your plans when he wakes up. He spends the day preparing for tonight, instructing his henchmen on what to do and gathering supplies for the robbery. Why aren’t you texting back? The Joker hates it when he sends you messages and you don’t respond right away.

A few more hours pass by, still nothing. And why didn’t you two return yet? You have to go with him tonight. Texting again for the 50th time, no reply… and again, and again. Couple more hours go by…it’s getting dark, no sign from you. Time passes by and nothing.

J starts to get impatient. It’s night time now and he has to cancel the plans. Everything is postponed. My God, he’s not thrilled about it but there is no trace of you so he forgets he is mad about his ruined scheme. He calls around to see if anybody saw you or heard from you. Nobody did.

Where are my girls? he wonders, reading the message from Frost that lets him know the henchmen didn’t find anything around town. The Joker sent them all out and about to search for you and he stayed behind at the penthouse, just in case you will return. What if someone took you? The thought makes him squirm on his chair. What if you just…left? That’s impossible, there is no way you would… …right?… What if you got caught? Would they take you to Arkham? The police station?…

1 in the morning and he is getting more and more restless and worried on your disappearance. It’s so unlike you to do such a thing, even if you fight you never leave him hanging: you always text him back or tell him your whereabouts.

Where are my girls?

He finally has the peace and quiet he was so adamant to request this morning, but dammit, the silence is deafening. This is what it feels like without you and Emma around? You are always around. J doesn’t like the quietness. At all. Or the weird ache in his chest again.

If nothing turns up in a few hours, he will look for you two himself with the whole crew, even hire more people. Swipe the city to every little corner until he finds something. Will he find anything? He has to, no other option.

The Joker needs his girls back.


“Ssstttt, be quiet, honey,” you tell Emma as you close the door behind you. You pick her up in your arms because she is very sleepy and fussy. You went to the park and then got out of Gotham for a drive. You really wanted to take her to the woods on the old deserted highway because it’s your favorite spot: you can see deers out there and so much wildlife she would have surely enjoyed. But your car broke down in the middle of nowhere and on top of everything  your phone died and you didn’t have the charger with you.

The entire day you tried to find the problem and fix it with no success. Then the night came and you couldn’t see well anymore and decided to wait until the morning. You were lucky another vehicle passed you by and the driver stopped to help. The guy had no idea who you were but it didn’t made you less alert and prepared to kill in case he turned out to be a psycho. Ha, that’s a good one. You actually softly laughed at the idea: a woman like you suspecting someone else of being a psycho.

But… he was actually able to start your car and you drove right back to Gotham.

3 in the morning- jeez, what a looong day!

You walk in the master bedroom and you see The Joker sleeping on your side so you have to go on his, carefully placing Emma in the middle and finally winding down.

“Daaaddyyyy…” she snuggles to his chest, half asleep, realizing he’s there.

He opens his eyes and gulps, crushing her in his arms while she winces, uncomfortable.

“I can’t breathe…” she complains, already dozing off and he loosens his embrace, reaching for you.

“Where…where were you????????” he whispers, concerned but striving to conceal how distressed he still is.

“The stupid car broke down”, you hum, keeping it down for your daughter, scooting over towards him as much as you can without squashing your kid,” and the phone died too. The whole thing was such an ordeal, really bad luck. I am beat. Did you go on the heist?”

“Yeah,” J lies. “Why, you think I wouldn’t go without you?” he hisses but you don’t even care. You are already snoozing, holding his hand on top of Emma.

“Didn’t you enjoy the day without us though?” you struggle to say in your sleep. “You didn’t want us around…”

“Yeah, it was great,” The Joker intertwines his fingers with yours, continuing even if you don’t really hear him anymore at this point. “ I had fun without you two.”

My girls are back, he thinks, finally at ease after being on the edge all day. And the weird ache in his chest makes him take a deep breath. It’s a strange type of pain he can never quite pinpoint.



An Infinity of Yes

I don’t have a lot of time this morning and I really shouldn’t be writing this, but…

I’m still happy!  And as is my way, I had to write about it.  So, a moment away from the angst to celebrate the momentousness of a yes.  For the nonnie who requested a little celebratory smut…

Cause I don’t know if you ya’ll knew or now, but Emma Swan and Killian Jones are engaged!

Originally posted by captainswanouat

Under the cut for the normal, smutty reasons…

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A Babies!! On Ice tidbit:

After Koichi and Kyo win their first Junior Worlds, a documentary team makes a short feature called Dynasty: A Figure Skating Story. The film team basically descends on Kyushu for a week to follow around the twins and Yuuri and Viktor.

They’re expecting a super-serious environment where Viktor and Yuuri wake their kids up before dawn and have the twins on the ice before sunrise.

And they do get this, but instead of the almost-solemn tone they were expecting of the family, they get:

- Kyo and Koichi, age thirteen, arguing with their 20-year-old brother about the gender of the word “table” in German loudly across the tatami room;
-Mikhail, who has not slept because he has a Biology test on Monday morning, intermittently flicking sugar cubes at Koichi and Kyo as they argue with him. Every once in awhile, one of the twins will catch one in their mouth–Mikhail congratulates them genuinely on their good catch.
- Viktor spending ten minutes trying to get Yuuri out of bed. At one point, the cameras pick up Yuuri mumbling, “Why did we reproduce.”
- They finally get out the door at eight o'clock. Mikhail and Emma come with so they can get shots of the two of them on the sidelines. They have difficulty getting shots that aren’t Emma laughing at Koichi or Kyo falling–or Mikhail feverishly flipping pages in his book on the bleachers.
- “Could you maybe do part of one of your old programs for us?” the directors ask Viktor, and Viktor says something like, “Not if you want me to keep my ACL! But my husband will do one of his!”
-Every Nikiforov child in the building stopping what they’re doing to watch otosan skate.
- “Is it true that you ended your career because of your pregnancy with your eldest daughter?” They ask Yuuri, and Yuuri just tilts his head back and laughs hysterically.
- Kyo and Koichi go to a local competition where they try to play up the rivalry between Yuuri and his former home team competition Kenjiro Minami, but it’s difficult when Minami hugs Yuuri on sight and introduces him to his own students as “Japan’s Hero.”
- Kyo and Koichi are the picture of professionalism when on the ice, but immediately afterward are arguing in the kiss&cry over who gets to keep the eevee plush someone threw on the ice.
-“We make Katsudon when someone wins!” Viktor says, gleefully cutting up veg while Yuuri breads pork.
“Doesn’t that have a lot of empty calories?”
Every Nikiforov in the room gasps.
- They call Irina before bed and it mostly devolves into Yuri P. loudly demanding when his godbabies will visit him next.
-“Say hi to your sister everybody!”
“SEND ME MORE VODKA,” Mikhail screams over everyone else. “THE GOOD STUFF. YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE.”

Editing the film is very, very hard…but hey, it goes to Sundance?

You Make Me Better

BASED ON THIS POST by @bleebug and subsequent comments from @thesschesthair and @seethelovelyintheworld Thanks ladies for this inspirational prompt, I had a great time writing this.  Thanks to @laschatzi and @xhookswenchx for read through and beta services!

Also on ao3 and ffnet

CS Neighbors AU where Emma is a nurse and Killian is her definitely-faking-it hypochondriac neighbor who uses illnesses and injuries as an excuse to talk to her.


Emma had just put her dinner together and sat down on her couch with a nice glass of red wine, and Netflix ready to go. The upside to working in a small private practice was for the first time since attending college, Emma Swan had a somewhat normal schedule. It allowed her peaceful evenings to herself to do what she pleased. Tonight she’d been home from another long day for a mere half an hour and was beyond ready to relax.


“I should have turned off the goddamn lights,” she muttered.

“Swaaaan!” the interloper persisted, pounding on her door again.

The downside meant a certain pesky neighbor soliciting free medical advice on the regular. Rolling her eyes, she put the television remote and her glass of wine on the coffee table, knowing he wasn’t going to let up.

It wasn’t that she couldn’t be neighborly, but Killian Jones was a menace. The man was a hypochondriac of the worst kind - a fake hypochondriac - some new illness ailing him weekly. She flung her door open just as he was poised to knock again. The breeze it caused carried in his scent, and Emma was olfactorily assaulted by just one of the real reasons Killian Jones drove her crazy.  The next havoc he wreaked on her was the sight waiting before her. Killian Jones, shirtless… again, gingerly propped up against the frame of her door. Last time he’d shown up shirtless he’d insisted that a tiny mosquito bite on his back was a case of the shingles. She wondered if his shirtless visits were nothing more than a chance for him to flaunt his altogether delicious chest: just the right amount of definition and muscle covered by taut skin that pulled as he gesticulated his every word, all overlaid with beautiful black chest hair that descended into a thin trail disappearing under the waistband of his pajama pants.

“Swan, thank the gods you’re here, lass. I need medical assistance.”

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ab-normality  asked:

songbird + secret relationship/friends to lovers (thank you!)

Fools Like Me by Lisa Loeb

I see your two tropes and raise you a third. So have this friends to lovers/secret relationship/fake relationship fic. I ended up working on this a few days in a row because it was being difficult and begged to be longer than a short exercise. Thanks to @high-seas-swan​ for getting me writing last night and finishing this. 

T | 2k 

When the hostess asked how many in their party Elsa held up three fingers and gave Killian a smirk that made him nervous. She meant well but had an annoying habit of trying to set him up. He could have told her he wasn’t ready to move on from Milah which wasn’t exactly true, he could have told her his heart was engaged elsewhere but that was a little too true, instead, he avoided and made excuses. But she seemed to have found a way around that strategy.

“Love, who is joining us this afternoon?” He asked as they were escorted to their seats.


“Swan? Why did you invite her?” Killian tried to keep his voice level but he couldn’t help the flutter of excitement. Had Elsa managed to match him with the only woman he cared to be with? Quickly he reined in the thought, Emma was just one of their friends and Elsa had likely invited her as a friend.  

As they sat Elsa gave him a chiding look. “Killian, I know. Emma told me.”

He prided himself on his quick mind and ability to understand people and situations, it was one of the reasons he was a good lawyer, but he was struggling to wrap his mind around what Elsa was talking about.

“Told you what, exactly?”

“She told me about, you know.” Elsa smiled and then leaned forward to whisper. “That you two are dating.”

Killian’s mouth dropped open and his mind scrambled to make sense of a word that, up until that moment, had seemed so common. Him and Swan, dating? It was something he had wanted, had thought about more times than he could count, had assumed wasn’t possible because she saw him only as a friend–not boyfriend material as she had once said. It was something he had put far from his mind as he focused on being the kind of steady friend that she needed but now…

“Dating? She told you that?”

“Don’t look so surprised. She is my best friend, she was bound to tell me eventually. And don’t get mad at her either I kind of forced the issue by springing a blind date on her.”

Suddenly Killian understood exactly what had happened. Emma, not wanting to go on a date but not wanting to say why, had reached for an excuse that Elsa couldn’t push away. And since he spent so much time with Emma Elsa hadn’t thought to question it, she had probably squealed in delight at the idea of her two friends getting together. But why hadn’t Emma warned him, told him she was using him to get out of the clutches of well-meaning matchmakers?  

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Captain Swan + Automatic YouTube subtitles:

Once upon a time, Emma Swan and her Princess Squad found a blacksmith hiding under a pile of fries

Although Emma knew she should be worried about the blacksmith’s identity, there just were bigger problems in her mind 

Don’t worry, Emma. The past is in the past. And soon you will find your One True Love. It’ll be love at first sight:

Never shy with words, our Emma. Now she just needs to know who this mysterious stranger really is.

He looks like bad news. It’s just a shame he looks so good, because at that point Emma can’t help but let the truth slip out of her mouth

Get it, girl. But do know he comes with baggage. Just like you:

In 3 seasons you will understand why. Be patient.

That’s what we’ll see in the musical episode, Emma. Be more gentle, will you?

Okay, nevermind. He totally deserves to be chained up and abandoned in the beanstalk. 

Uh, yeah. Maybe that wasn’t such a great idea after all. 

It turns out Captain Hook is a teasing, sarcastic scoundrel. But two can play this game…

To Be Continued…

My Burden: Part 1 of 2

So i made a prompt about an EF AU where Deckhand Hook and Dark Hook are one of the same a la Jekyll/Hyde split… and it wouldn’t leave me alone, so i made an attempt to write it. 

I hope you like it, if not, I tried lol. A very very special thank you to @teamhook for being truly inspirational. She gave me the encouragement to give it a go and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind words. They really meant a lot to me. So this is for you. 

My Burden

SUMMARY: Emma falls for the shy deckhand, Killian Jones. But secrets are soon revealed and Emma finds herself face to face with his Darker self. The fight to mend the two halves of this broken man begins.


She’d never met someone quite like Killian Jones.

She’d been running an errand for Johanna down by the docks, collecting the herring she needed when she almost tripped over the man in question.

He’d been sitting on the edge of the pier, staring out onto the horizon when her legs almost collided with his back. She’d never met a man, much less a pirate, who could apologise so profusely for an accident that didn’t manage to happen.

His ears burned red and his eyes danced across the ground as he spoke to her, nervous hesitance in his speech. He intrigued her from the start, and a brave yet foolish move on her part had her asking him to carry the herring for her back to the inn where Johanna waited.

He was shy, introverted, polite; a complete gentleman in wolf’s clothing, so to speak. His garments were that of a fearsome pirate. All black and leather, harsh jewellery, kohl framing his eyes and a sharp, heavy hook braced on his left arm… but his manner was nowhere near the image he donned. Where other men would boast and brag or flaunt their egos before her, he remained reserved and unsure of himself. He was self deprecating; the meekest man she’d ever come across.

She couldn’t understand why people were weary of Killian Jones.

Johanna was the first to pull her aside when she entered the inn with the pirate.

“Don’t mix with the likes of him, Emma. He’s bad news, my dear. Trust me.”

But she ignored the woman’s warning and dragged the bumbling man to a table, sharing a bowl of fruit  with him and talking well into the evening twilight.

She found him quite often down by the dock, milling along the boardwalk where she’d greet him and make him blush before whisking him away to help her on her errands, or leading him around the village.

“So if your old crew abandoned you here, why haven’t you joined another crew?” she finally asked him as they sorted through a sack of potatoes.

He doesn’t answer, just simply shrugs and gives her a sweet smile before ducking his head and piercing a rotten spud to discard of. She’s rather glad that he doesn’t appear to be in a rush to leave.

It becomes apparent that merchant and pirate ships alike were less than reluctant to hire the poor man.

She assumed he wasn’t cut out for the seafaring life, thinking his mild, sensitive nature was deemed too weak for the rough living on board.

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Jolly Cafe

For @cinnamonduckling​ who thinks this is a fic where everyone dies and suffers and I make her cry, but no, it’s a fluffy and cute fic and I promise you Sofia, you will love it. 

Many thanks to @killiancygnus​ and @swanandapirate​ who helped with the story and were my betas. 

Based on this: 

“Omg I just went to get a latte from my regular coffee shop and I always have the same guy serving me and I must bug him so much as I would always ask for almond milk (I’m lactose intolerant) but they would just have lacto free so I could tell the difference in the milk and asked if they started serving almond milk and the guy just shyly said “well you always ask if we have it so I got it specially for you” this GUY BOUGHT THE MILK WITH HIS OWN MONEY I FEEL SO PREVILEDGED RIGHT NOW”


Words: 3220





And I would appreciate if you would let me know what you think, since this is the first fic I wrote after a few (five I think?) months.


The first time Emma Swan stepped into Jolly’s Cafe, she was stunned by the nautical theme that was all around. The walls were covered by old maps, anchors, pictures of the sea and different ships, wooden tablets decorated with ship’s wheels and even a replica of a ship on a wall. She fell in love with the place, not just because of the way it looked but also because it was near the beach (which Emma thought was part of the reason why everything was so… nautical) and their drinks were better than Starbucks or even Granny’s.  Another important thing that made Emma go back to the coffee shop, was the presence of the two brothers that worked there: Liam Jones, who was the owner of the shop which she found out thanks to Elsa and Killian Jones, Liam’s brother which found out about that thanks to his big mouth.

Elsa was the one who discovered Jolly’s Cafe and started to develop a crush on the owner since her first time there. Starting from the second time she went there, Elsa took Emma with her both for support and because she wanted to have her best friend there with her to talk about “the hot owner of the place”. Secretly, Elsa hoped that Emma would see something in the “even hotter brother of the owner’s business” (Emma’s words, not hers) too, but since Emma was very good at spotting a lie, and Elsa a really bad liar, Emma found out very soon what Elsa’s real intentions were.

“I’m not going to fall in love with him as soon as I lay eyes on him, Elsa. That’s you, not me,” Emma told her friend.

“But he’s hot,” Elsa whispered to her.

“And I thought you had a thing for his brother,” Emma added hoping that Elsa would stop.

“I do, but I also have eyes, Emma.”

“Still not going to happen. So stop.”

The two began to go to Jolly’s daily, sometimes even twice a day, when they had their breaks, but Killian Jones mostly stayed out of their discussions.

Emma rarely asked for something that wasn’t a normal coffee, a hot chocolate in the morning or an iced tea in the afternoon so when she asked for a latte one morning, she should’ve expected to see a look of surprise on Killian’s face. And yet, she did not.

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Enoch O'Connor(Miss Peregrine’s Home For Peculiar Children):

Part 1: Sadness

Emily and Enoch grow very fond of each other and Enoch gets possessive after Jacob’s arrival at the children’s home.


The next morning I woke up since Bronwyn was sitting on my bed, shaking my arm excitedly. Happiness. “Hey, Emily, wake up. Wake up, Emily.”, she laughed causing me laugh as well.

“What time is it?”, I yawned and stretched my arms. “Time for breakfast.”, she giggled and pulled me out of my bed with her supernatural strength.
“Okay, okay, I’m up.”, I laughed, going to my wardrobe. “I’m going to wake Enoch.”, Bronwyn informed me before running off again. I change into decent clothes and entered the hallway where I saw Bronwyn, who ran down the stairs, and Enoch. Tired.

“Good Morning, Emily.”, he said quietly, his voice tired and monoton. I smiled, happy about the fact that he talked to me.
The corners of his mouth lifted a bit, while we went down the stairs. Nervous.

“You don’t have to be nervous around me.”, I whispered since I didn’t want anyone to hear. He just nodded before we entered the dining room, where everyone was waiting for us.

They stared at us while we sat down and I could see a lot of diffrent feelings. Happiness. Tiredness. Curiosity. Confusion.
But I ignored all of them and started to eat.

“First things first. Since I heard some noises not only this night but also some nights before…”, started Miss Peregrine, “I wanted to remind you that it’s forbidden to leave the room after nine o'clock, as you know. And I do not like anyone to be awake after eleven.”
The children looked around, confused and not knowing why Miss Peregrine was talking about this.

I looked at Enoch. Uncomfortable. I gave him a smile after he catched me watching him. He turned his head without showing any reaction. “Amusement”, I heard Horace’s voice in my head. But I only glared at him since I didn’t want to draw attention to us.

“Secondly, I want some of you to pick up Abe’s grandson Jacob. He’s currently in Cairnholm in 2016.”
Except for Enoch, everyone was excited to get a visiter and almost everyone wanted to go get Jacob.

After breakfast Claire, Fiona, Horace, Enoch and me were the only children since all the others went off. While Miss Peregrine stayed inside, Horace and I got our books and sat outside on our usual reading spots and Fiona entertained Claire by growing a lot of different types of flowers.

I hadn’t seen Enoch since breakfast but I was pretty sure that he was sitting in his room. Or maybe he was watching me and Horace again from his window.

So I looked up from my book and to Enoch’s window but I couldn’t see anything.

A few minutes later I saw Enoch leaving the house and my gaze followed him to the other side of the garden where he sat down in the grass. Excitement.

I was thinking about giving him some company when Horace spoke up without looking up from his book, “Emily, don’t you want to fulfill my prophecy? I mean he sits on the exact spot as in my dream.“ 

“I don’t know, maybe he wants to be alone, like usually.”, I mumbled and chewed on my lip. “You two are never going to get together if you keep thinking like that.”, he chuckled, this time looking at me. Concern.

“You think that I’m not happy, don’t you?”, I questioned, not knowing why he was concerned. “No, I know that you’re not happy due to the fact that you never pay attention to your own feelings.”, he replied and I couldn’t help but chuckle. That was exactly what I had realised the day before.

“Yeah, yeah.”, I only said, laying my book on the ground before standing up.

I went over to Enoch and carefully laid my hand on his shoulder causing him to look up at me. Excitement. He gave my a smile, even a relativly huge one and I lowered myself down next to him, my shoulder brushing his.
This was exactly like in Horace’s dream.

“So, Enoch, what made you come out of your little cave, hm?”, I wanted to know, chuckling while I stretched my legs.
He was quiet for a brief moment and took a deep breath before he spoke, “You, actually.”

My heart beat stopped and I only let out a nervous laugh. When I turned my head, I saw him fiddling with his fingers. Nervous.
“Well, I think that’s a nice reason.”, I giggled and looked at my hands, too.

Suddenly, I saw his left hand getting into my view and he slowly took my hand to interwine our fingers. After that I heard him sigh and I smiled to myself before glancing at him. Relief. Contentment.

I noticed that my chest lifted and sank really fast since I was breathing a bit heavily. I tried to calm me down, not knowing wether Enoch had noticed it, too.

“Only this morning you told me not to be nervous but now you are.”, he stated, strengthening the grib on my hand.
“Yeah, um… I don’t really know why I’m so nervous right now.”, I confessed quietly and sighed. “It’s okay. I’m nervous, too.”, he mumbled and I looked at him again. Contentment.

“Millard, pass the ball!”, I heard Hugh ’s shouting and turned around, groaning. “The silence is officially over now.”, I mumbled making Enoch smile.

“You know… um, I’m not really good with words but…”, he started nervously, “I kinda like you very much”

“I like you, too.”, I replied quietly and saw a smile appearing on his face.

“Hey, Emily, don’t you want to meet Jacob?”, I heard Emma yell and I turned around to see them. Excitement. Happiness.

I jumped up and went to them quickly, leaving Enoch behind.
“Hey, I’m Jacob.”, said the tall brunet boy, giving me a little smile. “Emily.”, I introduced myself.

“You can see another person’s feelings, right? What am I feeling right now?”, he wanted to know. Curiosity. Happiness. “You’re happy and curious.”, I anserwerd and smiled at him, earning a smile from him as well. Amazement.

“That’s so cool! I mean, your peculiarities are so amazing!”, he exclaimed, a huge grin on his face. “A lot of people don’t think like that.”, Emma began, “You see, most of them…”

“Jealousy.”, I suddenly heard Enoch’s voice in my head. My breathing stopped and I quickly turned around, not listening to the conversation anymore. Enoch was standing where we had been sitting, his hands balled into fists and his face showing not only anger but sadness.

It was like I was glued to the spot not believing what just happened. Why did I hear his voice? And why is he jealous?

“Emily, are you okay?”, I heard Jacob ask, his hand grabbing my arm slightly. Of course, it’s because of Jacob.

“Yeah, I’ll just…”, I mumbled and turned around before going to Enoch, who still stood right on his spot. He shifted when he saw me coming, clearly not knowing what I was going to do. Nervous. Jealousy.

I had to admit - I didn’t know what I was going to do either. I just went for it. Throwing my arms around his neck as I reached him and pressing myself against his chest.

“What are you doing?”, he wanted to know with a monoton voice but his voice in my head told me something else, “Excitement. Jealousy.”
“Oh, I’m just proving that there’s no need to be jealous.”, I whispered and snuggled my face against his shoulder while his arms carefully sneaked around my body.

“I’m not jealous.”, he claimed making me laugh a bit. “Yes, you are.”, I simply replied.

After I loosened the hug I saw that his eyes were closed and that there was a little smile formed on his face. “Still, your peculiarity is scaring me.”, he mentioned and I rolled my eyes.

“Maybe you can make me some dolls and bring them to life, so that I can say that too for once.”, I laughed and he only nodded but not without giving me one of his rare smiles - at least rare until now…


So, this is the second part of Sadness. I hope you like it. I don’t know if I’ll write another part… please let me know if you want me to continue this story! :D

Feel free to send in requests! :)



Modern Conveniences

So the idea for this came from one of @freifraufischer‘s herd of anons, and then @sometimesangryblackwoman gave some prodding to get it written. Anyway, post-ep in which Henry sends the other Regina a care package of things from the modern world, and makes the mistake of soliciting suggestions.

A couple weeks after sending the Evil Queen off to a fresh start and a chance at some happiness, Henry writes her a note. It’s mostly to tell her they’re all okay, that they’ve survived the latest peril which has so marked his adolescence. She’d want to know, he thinks. He tacks on a post-script about his grades, fully aware that she won’t be pleased about that, but hey, there was an epic battle going on and a few nights where he was out late saving the world instead of studying algebra. Surely she can forgive him that.

It’s a one-way form of communication, but it’s the least of what he owes her. Every once in a while, he pens another note, telling her about the situation with Violet and how the horses are doing and everything he thinks she might want to know. It’s not enough, but it’s what he can do.

He’s taken little Neal to the park to give Snow and David some time to themselves and is thinking of what to say to his other other mom when he hears what the mothers in the park are saying. Princess Aurora is laughing about one of the first times she used the internet for shopping. “I couldn’t believe it. You just tell it what you want and it arrives! Better than magic, if you ask me.”

“It still comes with a price!” Ashley says, and the women all laugh.

It gives Henry an idea.

The family is having Thanksgiving at the Mills house. It’s the one holiday they all really embraced after the curse was broken—Mom loves to cook, Snow loves to decorate, and Emma loves to eat, so it’s perfect for their quirky little family. The night before, Henry informed them all that he could use his abilities to send things, modern conveniences she might miss, to the other Regina, so if they had any suggestions he was certainly open to them.

The table was stunned for a minute, but soon they were coming up with all kinds of ideas. Before long it devolved into a conversation of the old days in the Enchanted Forest, and sometimes about the things they missed during the year when Henry and Emma were in New York. But on Thanksgiving itself, Emma calls him aside. “Hey, kid, you haven’t made up your magical care package yet, have you?” she asks.

He shakes his head. “No, I wanted to see if there were any more ideas.”

“Right. So this might be a little embarrassing, but trust me, it’s necessary.”

She hands him a slip of paper and walks away. On the note are two items.

Tampons. Chocolate.

For half a minute Henry wants the earth to swallow him.

He shoves the embarrassment as far back as he can and tries to be sensible. Emma’s right, probably—okay, definitely, since he has no idea what this is like and she does. But ugh, he wishes the pen would let other people write down their seriously personal suggestions instead of him having to do this.

Half an hour later, Snow calls him away from football with the guys to the dining room, where she’s putting the finishing touches on the table. “Wow, Grandma,” he says, “it looks great.”

“You think so?” Snow replies. “I keep thinking the flowers are too tall, but I guess not everyone’s as short as me. You’re not even as short as me anymore.”

He grins by way of apology. “So what do you need help with?”

“Oh, I was actually going to give you another idea for the other Regina. I don’t want to embarrass you, but…”

The words aren’t even out of her mouth yet and Emma’s note may literally be burning a hole in his pocket. Why isn’t there ever a sinkhole when he really needs one?

He stammers his thanks and hopes he isn’t blushing.

Dinner is great, even if he can’t quite look a couple of the women in the eye. He stuffs himself on mock-apple pie (Mom’s idea of a joke), and when Mom gets up to wash the dishes, he follows her to help. The others try to protest that she shouldn’t be cleaning up when she did most of the cooking, but she waves them off, knowing she likes things done a certain way.

Henry knows her system, though, so he can help. The others clear the table and let mother and son get to work. As she washes and he dries the china, she says, “There’s something very important you need to add to your list for… the other me.”

Ugh,” he says. “I know, Mom. Emma and Snow both talked to me about this, okay? I know. Chocolate and… the other thing.”

Mom looks at him with this expression, torn between laughter and incredulity. “The other thing? Come on, Henry, the word won’t hurt you.”

The ground beneath him betrays him yet again, refusing to open and put him out of his misery. “Chocolate and tampons,” he mumbles.

With a soapy hand, Mom pats his cheek. “That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Seriously, he’s going to crawl into a cabinet and live the rest of his life in there as a hermit.

“Have you got a piece of paper?” she asks.


“Good. I want you to write this down.”

“Mom, Emma already gave me a note with this, so it’s not like I’m going to forget.”

“No, I want you to write down the actual brand. These things are not to be left to chance.”

Mortified, he obeys.


In that other place, Regina is between encounters with the angry young king—she’ll bring him around yet, she knows—when she gets a box from her son. It’s thoughtful and kind and makes her heart so full she thinks it must burst. But in the bottom there’s another box, wrapped in brown paper. Henry has scrawled a note on it. They said you needed this.

She laughs so hard when she opens it that she literally falls out of her chair.

My poor little prince, she thinks. You must have wished the earth would swallow you whole.

A picture speaks a thousand words.

In the last couple of days I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster, I’m not good at words but I feel like I need to somehow express my feelings.

When I started watching the musical episode I felt like this:

and by the end I was like this:

I was so happy that my otp finally got married, I thought that anything could ever erase the smile on my face.

But then JMO dropped her bomb… and the idea that next Sunday it will all be over (or maybe a season 7 without Emma Swan) scared me a lot.

Suddenly I felt so sad and empty…

At a certain point I even felt a little betrayed… (but just a little, I mean, I understand the reasons behind Jen’s decision, and I think she deserves all the best)

But today I woke up and…well…

Fictional characters have a sort of “expiry date”; when we start reading a book, we know from the beginning that there will be an end, but the most important thing is to enjoy the ride. And I consider myself incredibly lucky, because during the last six years I’ve had the possibility to watch (and live) this wonderful fairytale which is Once Upon A Time.

But fictonal characters have also the virtue that they are timeless, we will always carry everything they gave us, they will live inside us forever, and everytime we decide to rewatch this show (and I’m pretty sure I will rewatch it from the beginnig several times) it will come back to life again and again.

And last but not least, I’d like to thank all the people in this fandom that have make it so precious and unique for me. All the people I’ve getting to know because of this show. And all the incredible writers and talented artists that have made this journey even more pleasant. 

I hope we will go on talking and dreaming about this show forever.

nowforruin  asked:


A/N: This kept wanting to go angsty and depressing, so I’m pretty happy that it didn’t do that. Because fuck hormones.

Summary: Killian and Emma work at a luxury theater and he sets up a little surprise to cheer her up.

It’s no great secret that Emma’s favorite drink in the whole world is hot chocolate with cinnamon on top. She has had this drink somewhere in the thousands of times over the course of her life, and she never thought she would be chased away from it, but night after night of cleaning up the trash from the movie theater’s large bins has stopped her love in its tracks. The smell of hot chocolate mixed with beer and wine has soured her stomach so bad that she’s not sure if she can ever drink her favorite concoction ever again. Her face must give away her thoughts, because Killian is across from her in an instant, helping to lift the over-filled plastic liner from the can.

“I’ve got this, Swan. You’re free to tend to the sweeping if you’d prefer.”

She doesn’t really prefer, but it’s the lesser of two evils, so she grabs the broom and dustpan and gets to work sweeping up discarded wrappers, dropped popcorn, and forgotten candy from between and around each section of seating.

It’s been two years, eight months, and five days since she started working at the Storybrooke Luxury Theater. It’s the only one in the area that sells booze and dinner, that offers plush armchairs in the middle of the moderately-sized theater, beds in the front, and couches in the back. It’s been two years, eight months, and four days since she met Killian Jones, a fellow usher and waiter. His brother owns and manages the theater, but Killian chooses to work the screenings instead of behind a desk, claiming something about it offering him a better quality of life.

Like clockwork, Emma can hear him start humming some tune or another, marking his progress through the trash bins at the entrance of the theater, and she gets lost in the quiet song and the steady work. She knows it’s almost midnight, but time is almost irrelevant to her when she has nothing she’s returning home to. The only one she really cares to see when she’s not working is the person she gets to work with most often, so it’s a win-win situation that Killian is by her side through all of this.

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thesschesthair  asked:

smut prompt: close friends that were always in love but never got the chance to be together (timing etc). They both know how the other feels, and with only one night left they decide to give in to what could have been, before they have to say goodbye to it (and possibly each other) for good. (one's getting married in the morning or something) Angsty smut! :D

Your wish is my command!

Also on FF.NET and AO3

A lingering glance. A soft smile. A desperate yearning that wouldn’t fade. So much communicated between them without a word. Emma sighs into her wine glass. There just isn’t enough time. There are so many things that remain unsaid between her and Killian. But her bags are packed and a cab booked for 8 am. She is leaving and it was too late. Best leave things unsaid.

The party is in full swing. After a year in London she has returned to essentially say goodbye to Storybrooke forever. Her temporary transfer is being made permanent. The life she has created for herself over there awaited. The new friendships she has formed. The small apartment that she would soon share with Simon.

Good, dependable, kind Simon.

She tries not to think of him as her eyes seek out Killian. He’s done a good job of avoiding her that night. He was still hurt, she knew. The way his face had gone cold when she’d told him she was leaving for good was something she would never forget.

He’d thought she was coming home. He’d thought-

She doesn’t want to dwell on that.

Tipping back her glass, she pulls on a practised smile and pushes her way through the crowd.

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