emily is 17 today

7.17.17 therapy

Emily was back today. The session was okay, not great. We talked about my job interview last Friday. They asked for an additional reference from a supervisor and I have been scrambling to find someone. I’ve been extremely anxious about it, and depressed about losing the job over it. I did fine someone who was sorry of a supervisor, but not really, but hopefully it will suffice. (She took over for my last supervisor - I had changed programs but kept a case and she was the supervisor for that case.) I was let go from the job before this. They said they were closing my cottage (which they were) but I had deteriorated pacifically/emotionally that I was not even close to fulfilling my job responsibilities. I have been trying to track down someone, but my direct supervisor didn’t call me back and the program director doesn’t work there. I messaged him through Facebook, but he hasn’t read it yet.

Anyway, I’ve been depressed, feeling worthless and inadequate in pretty much every way. Emily tried to get me to talk about it, but I didn’t know what to say. At the end Emily did say that she was tempted to pretend to be a part supervisor, but obviously can’t. That was nice to hear and know she has confidence in me. I see her Thursday. Hopefully by then I will have an answer about the job. At the interview they said they’d probably make a decision next week, but after I emailed her today with the additional reference, she said she’d contact me as soon as she talked with both references. (I’d already given her contact info for my supervisor who left my agency in February and had supervised me for 3.5 years.) So it sounds like they are seriously considering offering me the job, but it’s hard to know.