elric family feelings

Sorry, I have so many Elric family feels ;m;

As I was thinking about how the root of Edward’s “hate” for Hohenheim is really just the fear of being unwanted (something Ed clearly struggles with, as demonstrated by his belief that Al hates him because of the accident), something occurred to me.

I think part of the reason that Ed is so rattled/upset by Hohenheim’s backstory is because it only adds evidence to his belief that Hohenheim left the family because he didn’t want them anymore. Because if Hohenheim is 450-ish years old, maybe he’s played house before, maybe he’s gone through the motions of family with other people. If so, then the family with Trisha would just be a repeat. Boring. So of course Hohenheim would have left.

And just, nng, it hurts my heart. Darius and Heinkel are being all “give your old man a chance” and Ed’s being so stubborn about it, but that’s all he knows to do. After all, closing himself off and setting up barbed-wire fences of hate is so much easier to do than letting himself be vulnerable and risk abandonment again.

I also think this is why hearing Hohenheim genuinely express how sorry he is and how he wishes he could have been there for his family is what finally makes Ed cry after so long. This lie of being unwanted has been in the poor kid since he was five years old, so no wonder finally letting go of that brings Ed to tears. That’s some serious catharsis going on.

sofiakkuma  asked:

parental!royed with 42 ? (i know its not a pairing but you write them so well ;o;)

Ahhh, of course! Anything for you, dear :)

“I swear it was an accident.”

Rubbing the bridge of his nose agitatedly, Roy once again looked down at the report his youngest subordinate had handed him, wrinkled and frayed by the unavoidable beating it had received when the boy had once again recklessly thrown himself into the fray. The report was sloppily written and full of errors, rushed and thrown together in an attempt to get it to Roy before another source of news regarding Edward’s latest mission reached his ears. Unfortunately for the golden-haired youth, the report had arrived on his desk too late.

But no matter how truthful and honest the report was, it was still clear that someone, namely the one that had caused the accident in the first place, would have to pay. And after what had happened last month, Roy knew that the boy’s funds had taken a serious hit. 

Looking up at Edward, he saw that the normally cocky youth was staring down at his feet, rubbing his boot in circles on a particular spot on the carpeting, his expression solemn and remorseful. He knew damn well how serious this matter was, and how detrimental it could be if he were required to follow through with repaying everything that had been damaged…

With a sigh, he placed the report on his desk and said, “I believe you, Fullmetal.”

“So how much do I owe them?”

Glancing back up at the youth, he saw Edward’s dulled golden eyes looking back at him.

“Nothing,” Roy replied as he signed the bottom of the document. “An accident is an accident; there’s no denying that. Just don’t let it happen again, alright?”

The boy hesitated, as if unsure whether or not he believed the Colonel. But when Roy’s face softened, Edward’s did the same. “Honestly,” he asked. “I don’t have to pay or anything?”

“No,” Roy clarified as he pulled his desk drawer out and slipped the paper inside. “All I ask is that you be more careful next time, alright?”

“Alright,” Edward replied as he bobbed his head. “I promise.”

“Good. Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Accepting the dismissal, Edward shoved his hands into his pockets and trudged over to the door. But before he stepped out, however, he paused and looked over his shoulder and toward Roy. “Thank you,” he muttered one final time before quickly slipping out to meet up with his younger brother again.

Shaking his head, Roy opened the desk drawer again and reached past the report he had put in there moments before, pulling out a checkbook instead. He was thankful that, after last month’s incident, he had planned ahead and requested more funding for instances like this, especially if that meant keeping as much pressure as possible off of the boy’s already weighted shoulders.