elephants of thailand

magic-magnus-heaven-sin  asked:

Hey Cassie! Thank you so much for creating Ty. I also have autism and it is so refreshing to see a complex and loveable character who has it; I love him so much. So, question: what is Ty's favorite animal? If he could keep any pet, what would it be? I just wonder because I think his love for animals is super sweet and endearing. :)

Thank you! That aspect of Ty is definitely based on a specific real person I know on the spectrum, who has always adored animals. Having gotten to spend a bit of time with elephants in Thailand recently it struck me how much Ty would love them – they so affectionate, intelligent, and gentle. But since there’s not a lot of elephants in Malibu, I’d say Ty loves animals that are often not seen as pets by many – like adorable hedgehogs, which lots of people think of as prickly but when they’re not nervous are soft, gentle and like to be petted. 


Originally posted by stopdropandrollajoint

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@tylerjblackburn: I experienced one of the most beautiful and life changing days in Thailand at @phuketelephantsanctuary. This amazing organization offers a safe and ethical home for abused and exhausted elephants who have been tortured in circuses and tourist attractions. These elephants are being loved and nurtured here by a team of people dedicated to helping these elephants live a happy, safe, cruelty-free life. If you want to get involved, please join me in BOYCOTTING elephant rides and circuses that abuse these creatures. If you want to learn more or get involved, click the link in my bio. 🐘✌️❤️

6 Simple Ways to Make Your First Sugar Date the Best He’s Ever Had

Any POT might have been on dozens of dates with young, attractive women before he meets you. So you want to take full advantage of you first sugar date with a POT to make yourself stand heads and shoulders above the competition.

Here are 6 simple ways guaranteed to make it the best sugar date he’s ever had:

1. Channel a Mood

Ever notice how you could have a relentlessly long day at work, be absolutely pooped and then hear a favorite, upbeat song on the radio and instantly be in the mood to go paint the town red?

Or how ’bout when you’re rushing through your day, from one appointment to the next and you catch a whiff of a delectable scent that instantly takes you back to a sweet, not-yet-forgotten memory?

All of us have experienced this ability to instantly transform our mood. The smallest things can do it – a song, a scent, and even lingering on a memory.

We love taking advantage of this awesome ability we all have right before a sugar date. It doesn’t take long – you can do it just a few minutes before you meet the POT.

Here’s how: Before entering the meeting place, find a quiet place and choose a favorite memory – select one that’s fun, funny, outrageous, something that still makes you laugh and fills you with confidence. Now hold that memory ’til you are feeling the fun, lighthearted mood of that memory…and then walk in and introduce yourself to the POT.

Moods communicate – sometimes better than words – and you’ll be guaranteeing that his very first impression of you is one of absolute delight.

2. Arrange an Unusual Dinner or Event

Fun circumstances create fun memories. And fun memories tend to linger in a SD’s mind. So how do you create these fun memories?

The easiest way is to set unusual circumstances. Unusual things take us out of our comfort zones. They cause us to – if only just for a moment – see the world through slightly different eyes. They differentiate themselves from the minutiae of everyday life and as such, are easily remembered and not-so-easily forgotten. And they also have the effect of making us feel closer to the person we’re sharing the moment with.

All of these reasons are why we’ll always choose a slightly unusual setting for first sugar dates. It’s almost a guarantee that you’ll make yourself stand out among the other sugar dates he’s had and have a uniquely memorable time together. Not to mention – every time he thinks of that unusual experience, he’ll remember who he had it with.

So what sort of unusual circumstances should you aim for?

It doesn’t have to be extravagant – there’s no need for trapeze artists searing banana flambe with their toes. Just a simple twist on the usual. Here are some suggestions:

  • There are so, so many upscale restaurants. He’s been to them all. Why not suggest a cuisine he’s probably never tried? Like…maybe something you guys can eat with your hands? Ethiopian food is superb, can be eaten with your hands, and provides plenty of things to talk about.
  • Somewhere with belly dancers is always fun. The presence of curvacious women swinging their hips through tables heaped with food lends an atmosphere of sensuality that’s not easily forgotten.
  • Human sushi platter, anyone? Sushi restaurants serving their sushi atop naked women are far and few – and guaranteed to be a very memorable experience. Oh, and the natural sweat of the human body is meant to lend the sushi a unique flavor. You’ll never know if it’s true ’til you try it

3. Be Genuinely Curious

Isn’t it a lovely feeling when you know that someone is genuinely interested in knowing more about you as a person? SDs love this, too.

For the duration of the date, make him feel like the center of your attention.

You can do this simply by asking questions. Lots of questions. But…they have to be open-ended, thought-provoking questions.

Avoid typical, small-talk, dead-end questions like: “What do you do for work?” or “Where do you work?”

And go for open-ended, thought-provoking questions like: “Why’d you decide to start your own business?” or “Was becoming a lawyer your childhood dream? Oh, what was your childhood dream?” or “So…what do you want to be when you grow up?

And listen to his answer with curious, attentive eyes.

Approach the question-asking from the mindset that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know the core of the person sitting across from you – that his resume, his on-paper qualifications don’t matter squat – and you’re super curious to find out what makes him tick, what excites him, what his various idiosyncrasies are, etc.

This sort of attention is addicting. He’ll soak it up. And more often than not – he’ll be back wanting more.

4. Stay Mysterious

Some SBs may disagree with us on this, but we don’t advise giving much of yourself away, especially on the first date.

So while you should lavish attention and genuine interest on your POT and learn as much about him as you can, also do your part to selectively reveal only bits and pieces of yourself.

You can do this by staying on the conversational offense.

When he asks you questions, answer honestly but keep it simple and lighthearted and then toss a similar question right back at him.

Him: What’s your major?

You: Accounting. What can I say, I love money. What about you – what’d you major in? Did you end up working in something related?

And then follow up with related questions…”If you could do college again, what would you choose?” “What’d you enjoy the most about university?” And so on…

The point of this is not to be closed off – do answer questions and be honest and open. But be selective in what you reveal. Any fascinating and unusual things about you? Talk about those. As for the rest of your life, make him curious to find out more.

5. The Art of the Playful Tease

It’s your first meeting. You barely know each other. So how do you establish rapport in these first few moments of contact?

There are a lot of ways to build rapport, like through asking questions, attentive listening, and finding shared interests. And there’s always mimicking the other person’s body language and doing what you can to put them at ease.

But the simplest, funnest way to instantly build rapport and connection is by through the art of the playful tease.

Teasing, of the silly, playful variety (not the mean, snarky kind) is one of the most useful tools a sugar baby can have in her arsenal. It invites the SD to joke, have fun, and open up with you. The act of playfulness establishes rapport and connection like nothing else can. And this playful, unpredictable nature he sees in you keeps him on his toes and so interested that he hardly notices that he’s becoming attached on an emotional level with you.

Playfulness does all that. It’s a wonder that it’s not talked about as much as it should be.

To get you started, here’s an example of gentle teasing:

Him: You mentioned in your profile that you’re an aspiring actress?

You: Yes, but don’t worry – I won’t drop you once I make it big.

Him: Umm…thanks.

You: I’d wait a few weeks.

At the same time, remember that playful teasing is an art and not a science. Make sure you know how to toe the fine line between fun teasing and snarky meanness before you use this on a POT.

And always – always – smile.

6. The Law of Reciprocity

There’s this little law that we absolutely love making use of in any and all social situations. It’s called the Law of Reciprocity and it works charmingly on SDs.

To use it on a first date, spend a little time getting to know your POT’s interests. You’ve probably already emailed back and forth and chatted over the phone. Go over what was talked about to suss out something interesting about this guy.

And…get him a little gift for the first date.

It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant or expensive – the most we’ve ever spent was less than $20. We don’t do it for every first sugar date – just with the most promising ones. Some of the stuff we’ve gifted:

  • A POT said one of his most awesome memories was jungle trekking atop an elephant in Thailand. He was incredibly pleased when I showed up for our first date with a little wooden elephant I’d found in a local ethnic shop. Told him I thought of him when I saw it. We’re still friends to this day.
  • For a POT who claimed to share my affinity for all things sweet: a set of 3 adorable cupcakes. We shared them after dinner.

Even if these things seem to be small investments, they have amazing returns.

How?

‘Cause you just can’t help but like someone who has done something nice for you. Even if you never asked for that nice thing. That’s just how the Law of Reciprocity works.

Use it in your favor.

mariaoswin  asked:

Hi Cassie! First of all, I want to say that I'm so grateful that you created the Shadow world. And I also hope you are not so sensitive to criticism and hate as I am. We really love you and you should never forget about this. So, I have a question. Tessa was the last Starkweather as we know from TID. How then could Hodge exist in TMI?

I think we all remain sensitive to criticism and hate, but we do grow thicker skins over time – we can’t not. But time and many years teaches you patterns; watches how misogynistic systems work to demonize and thus delegitimize women isn’t pleasant but does provide a way to frame your own experience. (Which means that even though there are comments literally on that post, which is about demonizing women and accusing them of things they have not done so as to make yourself feel more comfortable in separating Bad Ladies from the ownership of their work, that say “But you are a bad lady and thus should not be allowed to write any more Malec, don’t you understand YOU ARE BAD?” I barely note them as anything but ‘another one of those.’)

In short: hate sucks, but I have an amazing group of fans, friends and colleagues who provide incredible support. And I have my work, which I love. I have Magnus and Alec to talk to. :) And the other day I rode an elephant in Northern Thailand. I can’t complain too much.

As for the Starkweathers I actually don’t think Tessa was the last, we know some of her ancestors fled England because of the horror of what happened to Adele and what become of Tessa’s grandfather. But remember even if she had been, when a family dies out, an Ascendant can choose their name and start the family again.