elemental attraction

The Major Arcana As Nosy Witch Questions.
  • The Fool: Do you practice witchcraft openly or in secret?
  • The Magician: Do you practice white magic, black magic, both or neither?
  • The High Priestess: How did you first discover your path?
  • The Empress: Favorite time to practice your craft?
  • The Emperor: Favorite place to practice your craft?
  • The Hierophant: Best advice you've ever received from a witch?
  • The Lovers: Which sign or signs(zodiac or elements) are you most attracted to?
  • The Chariot: Favorite witchcraft tools to use?
  • Strength: Do you cast spells?
  • The Hermit: Are you a solitary witch or are you part of a coven?
  • Wheel of Fortune: Do you practice palmistry?
  • Justice: Do you work with plants and herbs?
  • The Hanged Man: Which area of witchcraft are you least familiar with?
  • Death: Do you believe in, or have experience with past lives?
  • Temperance: Which area of witchcraft are you most comfortable?
  • The Devil: Who is your closest witch friend?
  • The Tower: Have you ever cursed someone?
  • The Star: Which areas of witchcraft would you like to be better acquainted?
  • The Moons : Favorite thing to do during a full moon?
  • The Sun: Do you read tarot cards?
  • The Final Judgement: Do you work with spirits?
  • The World: What type of witch are you?

If your chart is lacking in one element you likely are attracted to that element in other people or in the physical world. I.e. If you lack in water you might admire beaches and love to swim. Whether or not you are attracted to that element it is healthy for your mind, body, and soul to be around things associated with the element.

Candle Color Correspondences

RED - Energy, health, passion, sex, protection, fire, fertility, fast action, strength, potency, lust, blood. Element: Fire

PINK - Love, friendship, romance, honor, spiritual healing, caring, affection, forming partnerships, peace, emotional healing.

YELLOW - Action, inspiration and creativity, studying and intelligence, concentration, memory, logic, learning, attraction, confidence. Element: Sun/Fire

ORANGE - Happiness, business deals, attracting good things, success, career, goals, stimulation, attraction, power, luck, sudden changes.

GREEN - Plant magic, mother earth, earth worship, money, success, growth, wealth, physical healing, health, marriage, fertility, employment, balance. Element: Earth

BLUE - Peace, calm, loosing weight, wisdom, understanding, protection, harmony, inspiration, truth, patience, health and happiness, luck, communication, loyalty, occult power. Element: Water

DARK BLUE - Represents the subconscious, healing, psychism, slow change. Element: Water

PURPLE - Ancient wisdom, the third eye, psychic powers, meditation, spirituality, success, confidence, hidden knowledge, protection, divination, contact with spirit world, Element: Soul or the Spirit

BROWN - Home, friendships, balance, animal magic, earth magic, concentration and studying, wealth, success, intuition, psychic powers and ESP. Element: Earth

BLACK - Protection, hex-breaking, reversing, banishing, destroying evil or negativity, binding, and repelling. Also used for healing very powerful illnesses.

WHITE - Dawn, purification, peace, truth, protection, spirituality. White can be used in place of any other candle color and is suitable for any ritual. Element: All

MAGENTA - Quick change. Use this candle with other candles to initiate a quick response or fast changes.

INDIGO - Karma, balance, restoration of balance, meditation, stop another person’s spell against you.

GOLD - Sun-Worship, the God, success, wealth, money, masculinity, playfulness, luck, divination, victory.

(By AmberSkyfire)


I’ll get back to doing prompts as soon as I get this beauty out of my system; So have some random FEH WIPS that I’ve been working on and off for… Eurgh.

For real tho–I’M WEAK. Fjorm has so many design elements I’m attracted to–hngggg♥♥♥ I’ve just been spending my time after work today and yesterday working on a more decent artwork of her because I’m in love. HELL IF I KNOW HOW TO DRAW THOSE DAMN PAULDRONS THO. OTL

(Commissions are still OPEN.)

“It’s better to be a cute boy than an ugly butch lesbian.”

Six or seven years ago (and longer!) there were huge debates taking place about the term “queer”, what it meant to the lesbian, gay, bi and trans community, whether it should be added onto the acronym and whether people who defined specifically as “queer”, to the exclusion of any of the other letters, should be welcomed into LGBT spaces.

At the time, the term “queer” represented a radical element that was highly attractive. Here were a group of people who seemed to be anti-capitalist, unapologetic, anti-assimilationist, aggressive and non-conformist. And to 20 year-old-me they just looked so bloody cool. I came through school and college having the word lesbian hissed at me, but not really having any other language to describe myself. I argued viciously for the inclusion of the “Q”, and shouted down the concerns raised by older (and sometimes not) members of the LGBT community that the word “queer” for them echoed horrendous experiences of homophobic assault and bullying.

“We’re reclaiming it,” I spat, “and anyway you can still be lesbian, or gay, or bi, and/or trans if you want.”

Fuelled by zeal, well-meaning enthusiasm, a complete lack of understanding of LGBT and women’s history and a massive streak of arrogance, I wrote these concerns off as archaic and narrow minded, and for that, I am truly sorry. 

As time passed, I started to feel ashamed about being a lesbian within the queer community. As one ex said to me “lesbianism is sooooo last century”. I was butch too, a real stereotype. I was ashamed of being a butch lesbian stereotype, and felt that I sucked at being a woman so much, that maybe I couldn’t be one, but the term “genderqueer” left me cold. I also didn’t fancy men, and they didn’t fancy me.

I didn’t realise until much more recently, but what is happening is the sexism and homophobia found in mainstream society is just being re-appropriated and shoved out from the other side under the guise of radical queer politics; women who exclusively date and sleep with other women are being shamed for it by the very community they are supposed to be a part of, in a way that men who exclusively date and sleep with other men are not. Being a lesbian in a society that heaps pressure on women to be with men is and always has been an enormously radical act.

An avalanche of hypocrisy, or was it always there?

In the last couple of years I noticed a big push within the community to educate on trans issues, change the culture around checking which pronouns people use, increase trans visibility and promote more respect and understanding around gender identity, which are all good things in my book. Intentional mispronouning, both in and outside of the LGBT community is a constant micro-aggression. But then something else happened. The same queers who were screaming bloody murder about people not getting their pronouns right, started to use gender neutral pronouns for me without asking. It didn’t feel right. Occasionally someone would ask what pronoun I used, and on hearing me say “she and her” would double take and say “are you sure?”

Why weren’t these queers taking my first answer? They certainly got angry when people questioned using the neutral “they”. It occurred to me that members of the queer community were questioning my right to define as a woman because of my androgynous appearance almost as much as straight homophobes had questioned my validity as a woman for the exact same reason. I felt increasingly pressured to define as something other than “woman”, and that being a woman, particularly without prefixing it with something like “genderqueer” or “genderfluid” or “non-binary”, was increasingly difficult to get people to accept. Was I so bad at being a woman that my own community wouldn’t even believe me? Isn’t it ironic that a supposedly radical community seemed to find the concept of a masculine woman so difficult to swallow?

If our behaviour falls outside of certain prescriptive boundaries laid out by straight people, must we now question our right to be women at all? Why has it become so offensive and revolting to be considered a woman in the queer community? Why don’t people, who experience the world as women, are treated and seen and oppressed as women, want to be women?

It’s because to be a woman in our patriarchal society is to be less. To be a woman is to be in an undesirable position. To abandon the label “woman” is to claw back some individual power, rather than see women as a political class and collective. In short, its because of sexism. An acquaintance said recently:

“It’s better to be a cute boy than an ugly butch woman.”

We need to talk about class, or the lack of talk about class.

I have lost count of the number of times I have heard or heard of some middle class MA Gender/Sexualities/Sociology Studies twerp shaming and condemning some poor gay seventeen year old for not knowing what a demisexual, panromantic, masc of centre genderqueer is. There are large numbers of the queer community who need to face up to the fact that they have a huge amount of social, educational and class privilege, and that some people do not get to read books that introduce them to all these terms. Some people grow up in houses where there are no books, or the only thing they ever read with the terms “lesbian” and “gay” are tabloid newspapers spitting bile. Sometimes people make mistakes, or have limitations of language. And some of us think that the obsessive developing of endless terms is an intentional attempt to stretch the definition of our community so much that the community in fact will not exist.

Butch and femme are terms that were prominently used amongst working class lesbian communities, and were later sneered at and denounced as aping heterosexuality by elements of the separatist feminist movement, who were often middle class and/or had more academic backgrounds. Now we see lesbian women and gay men being sneered at and dismissed as “monosexual” by elements of the community in much the same spirit, “femme” has been appropriated and is frequently used to refer to any feminine presenting queer person and the word butch is still coded as ugly. There are no cafes, bars or clubs that specifically cater to LBTQ women left in London and very few spaces elsewhere.

You have a right to be queer, and others have a right to be lesbian, gay, bi and/or trans.

I have learnt to be unapologetic about being a woman who exclusively has romantic relationships with other women. But it is a shame that I had to learn this twice. There are other people who feel that their identity, although not hetero/cisnormative, is not represented in the L, B, G or T, and they define as queer (or both). That is fine, if that is what they want. What is not fine is the shaming and erasing of lesbians that goes on. What is not fine is to make the identity of “lesbian” synonymous with trans exclusive feminism when it isn’t. What is not fine is the ridicule of butch women that goes on, whilst skinny white masculine of centre genderqueers enjoy pedestal type positions in the queer community. It is not fine to disrespect and enter and disrupt the few women only spaces left when you know you do not experience oppression as a woman. It is not fine to harass the organisers of a women only event because you’re a man* and consider yourself a lesbian and feel you should be welcomed. That’s just complete misogynist douchebaggery.

It is not fine to force people to call themselves queer and erase their gay and lesbian and bi identities in the process. It’s just hypocritical. And its shit politics. Stop it.

I am a butch lesbian woman. And that’s ok.

*I am talking here about douchebag men who exploit nuanced gender politics to harrass lesbians, so don’t bother with the OP is a TERF stuff.

which elements your sign attracts

aries: fire, air

taurus: water, earth

gemini: air, fire

cancer: fire, air

leo: air, water

virgo: water, earth

libra: fire, water

scorpio: fire, earth

sagittarius: water, air

capricorn: earth, air

aquarius: air, water

pisces: earth, fire

Defying Expectations

The ATLA AU; in which Law and Sabo are waterbenders, Ace is a firebender, and Luffy bucks the world’s expectations and is an unconventional airbender. 

It’s funny how everyone considers earth to be the stubborn element.

As far as Trafalgar D. Water Law is concerned, air is the most persistent son of a bitch to ever exist. And he’s only saying this because he knows Monkey D. Luffy, Airbender and humongous pain in the ass.

In his ass.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

What is your response to people who say that specifically the cishet aces don't belong? I've been talking with exclusionists (read: I'm getting yelled at and yelled over by exclusionists) but on some level they make sense like I can see the less hateful ones just not wanting cishets in a place for not-cishets. But society already tosses out aces and aros, regardless of how else they identify, and regard us as filthy not-fully-straights. Shouldn't we have a place in the queer community? [1/2]

[2/2] Also do you know why exclusionists always pull out the “you’re not illegal” card to invalidate ace oppression like obviously it’s not as bad as homosexual oppression but why do they refuse, and refuse so violently, that we could possibly be oppressed? How can we finally make them believe and accept us? My family would disown me for being asexual because it’s queer, while the community disowns me for not being queer enough. I have to add my genderflux “credential” to count.

At this point in my life, my response is usually just to shake my head and walk away. Or, because this is the internet, block and move on.

But here are some thoughts. I’m speaking from personal experience on this one, so there are no sources. My life is the source. You can feel free to throw this at anyone who tries to argue that there are some aces that don’t belong in the community and other aces that do.

An Open Letter to Ace Exclusionists,

The problem with your argument is that, ultimately, the LGBT+ community does not get to decide who is Straight. (I use capital-S Straight as shorthand for cisgender, heterosexual, and heteroromantic - the people in the position of power when it comes to orientation. People who differ from this mold in any way, including gender, are usually not considered Straight by Straight people.)

I, an asexual, arospec, agender person, don’t get to roll out of bed in the morning and decide “you know what, I’m close enough to being Straight that I’m going to be a Straight person today.” I could probably squash enough of my identities flat enough to pass. In fact, I do that on a relatively daily basis. I pretend to be cis every single day of my life. Nobody is out there arguing that being closeted actually means that I’m cis, and therefore occupy a position of relative privilege. If someone figures out that I’m actually nonbinary, I could be in danger.

Likewise, I pretend to be attracted, in all the expected ways, to people of the binary gender that’s not the one I was assigned at birth. I am really good at looking straight. (I mean. I’d better be. I’ve only been practicing it for a couple of decades now.) That doesn’t make me Straight. If that mask slips, for a moment, I’m at risk.

(At risk of what? Well. At risk of losing my apartment because my roommate isn’t comfortable with my orientation. At risk of my partner deciding, over my objections, that they can fix me with the healing power of their genitals. At risk of my parents demanding that my doctor medicate me to make me normal. At risk of getting laughed at, humiliated, told that I am broken, and wrong, and need to be fixed, by the people I care about most. These are all things that happened to me, personally. That’s my life story, kids. Do those sound like Straight experiences to you?)

Some aces have an easier time keeping that mask in place than I do. They actually feel some kind of attraction to people that aren’t their same assigned binary gender. But they are still not performing Straightness in the way that Straight people expect it to be performed. They’re missing a key element of Straight attraction. They’re risking the same things I am, if their masks slip, because their experiences are not Straight experiences any more than mine are.

If you accept that some asexual people have a place in LGBT+ communities, you need to take all of us. We all, regardless of the rest of our orientations, share a common experience of Not Being Straight.

And if you don’t think that any asexual experiences are LGBT+, I genuinely do not have time for you. I’ve got more important shit to do.

With Love,

Natasha is Young: Costuming Denée Benton in “The Great Comet”

I had a special request in the Ask box for another entry in my The Great Comet series, and I am happy to oblige. This time, I’m turning my attention to something I’m typically more comfortable reviewing, namely women’s costuming. Having covered the male lead last time, I want to take a look at the costumes of Denée Benton this time, because they really show off Paloma Young’s skills as a costumer. I’ve picked a couple of Natasha’s (Ms Benton) outfits from The Great Comet to focus on, but I really do think you should check out all the costumes from this production; it’s definitely one of the most sumptuous musicals currently running on Broadway.

I’ve talked a lot about theming in costuming, and this is a good place to reiterate those points. Costume designers use color to make a statement, and this production is no exception. Costuming the character of Natasha in white for virtually the whole of the musical imbues the character with a kind of purity that none of the other characters possess to the same degree (with the possible exception of Sonya…but then again, “Sonya is good”). I think that’s important in the context of the musical, but there’s another reason that I think the white coloring of Natasha’s costumes is so important, and it goes to the heart of what makes The Great Comet such a unique theatrical experience: the staging and lighting.

Anyone who has seen the staging for The Great Comet knows that it is an interactive performance, one where the audience is very much brought into the heart of the action. As a result, the lighting design is more complicated than in your average production. That means your costumes need to be able to catch the light, and it makes the detail work you put into a costume all the more important. After all, members of the audience will be seeing the actress and character from every angle, as opposed to just a handful. Let’s take a look first at The Coat that is featured prominently in many of the promotional images and in the musical itself:

I want to start off by saying how in love I am with this coat. It’s regal and rich, and it hangs beautifully on Ms Benton (I haven’t had the chance to view anything from the understudies, so I’m focusing on the actress who originated the role). This is a posed shot, but it gives us a view of just how gorgeous this piece is. As I mentioned in my 9 to 5 review, outerwear is not something that is commonly featured on Broadway, and so costumers tend to take their cues more from history or current trends rather than other productions. But Paloma Young has come up with something beautiful and original here.

It’s floor-length, which has the effect of adding to Ms Benton’s height (something costumes can do, as I have noted in other reviews) and giving her more of a stage presence. The white is almost creamy in color in every photo I have seen, which is a good choice, I believe; pure, stark white can look artificial to the eye when it is overused, and a formal coat like this in the era (remember we are dealing with the 1810s) would almost certainly not have been in pure white. But this comes close, and onstage, it has the effect of being almost blindingly brilliant–which has to be intentional. Take a look at this shot where Ms Benton is lit from behind; the coat almost seems to glow as it catches the light, but you can still see the creaminess of the color where there is shadow:

Just take a moment to drink that in. Part of it is the effect of the spotlight, but it is not easy to get this kind of effect in a stage production, and Ms Young deserves a huge amount of credit for her fabric choice and the cuts of the cloth here. There’s an angelic feel here that gives me all the good feelings, and it really forces you to pay attention.

Onto the details of the coat itself! As can be seen in the first still, the coat is relatively simple in design, but that adds to its elegance in my book. Floor-length, it closes through the addition of four silver buttons on the bust and chest, which manage to stand out without being distracting. Ms Young has added a false belt around the high waist, using gold embroidery to add a splash of color to the cream of the coat itself. The embroidery takes the form of gold roping, which I think ties it nicely to Pierre’s waistcoat, which was the subject of my first Great Comet review. It flows nicely while still being a tiny bit abstract, and I think helps to make the coat more impressive.

The collar and cuffs of the coat match (which is important, I think, when one wants a classical look) through the addition of white fur. That’s a nice hat-tip to Russian styling of the Romanov era (1613-1918), which often emphasizes fur elements both for functionality and for design. Earlier on, functionality would have been more important–a Russian winter is brutally cold and fur is naturally warming–before eventually giving way to being a design element; given the setting of The Great Comet, I think it’s fair to say we’re more into the design era. 

What I like about the addition of the fur is that it adds another texture to the coat itself; while not apparent in the stills here, under magnification the coat is a rough, almost leathery fabric that would help to keep the wearer warm while still looking elegant and graceful to an outside observer, as it does to the audience in this production, whether in the orchestra or onstage in the special seating. Texture is important, I think, even when it isn’t directly observed, because the eye is capable of picking up tiny, minute details even without us being conscious of it. It’s apparent that this isn’t a completely smooth fabric, but the addition of the fur adds a softness to the coat that it might otherwise lack.

The other amazing costume that is worn by Ms Denton in her role as Natasha is the White Dress. I think when most people hear that there is a ball scene in this musical, they conjure up images of voluminous dresses with yards of silks and chiffons, but I think that’s because most of us have been spoiled by Victorian or 18th century costume dramas rather than those set in the era of The Great Comet. Regency-era attire, both in the West and in Russia, was a little bit more simple. Crinolines (the wooden or wire skeleton of a ball gown) had yet to come into fashion in Russia as they had (to some extent) in France, and instead, a lot of emphasis was given to relatively straight cuts of fabric. The idea was that a woman’s figure could be hinted at, but not excessively revealed, leaving a slight air of mystery that would change over time.

Taking a look at the White Dress, the 1810s fashion leaps right out:

The dress is a patterned white fabric, where the pattern is a series of circular elements that are a part of the dress rather than being adornments added later on. There is a very high waist, which is a classic hallmark of this era of fashion in both the West and in Russia, and the bust and chest are richly adorned with detail work I’ll take a look at in a moment. 

But look at the overall effect of the dress first. The fabric flows down to floor-length, is capable of floating when Ms Benton is in motion (as this shot shows), and has a regal look without being too imposing or intimidating. Compare that to, say, some of the dresses that Helene wears in the production, and the effect is even more important. Natasha is evolving slowly throughout this musical, and the dress is a point of transition. She’s allowing herself to be absolutely gorgeous in the context of a grand ball, and the dress is made to show off her ability to revel in the moment.

The overall effect is only enhanced by taking a closer look at some of the detail from the top portion of the dress. Here, we see Natasha being aided in getting ready by the aforementioned Helene (who may very well be the subject of her own review in this series), offering us not only a view of the detail but a chance for a little bit of compare-and-contrast:

First off, wow. I know I have a tendency to gush over design elements that I find attractive, but I can absolutely see why the Anon who asked about reviewing this dress cited it as their favorite-ever piece of costuming. The white, patterned fabric gives way to a saltire (an x-shaped) of fringed beadwork that sticks out from the dress and really gives it an effect that pops. It would have been easy to go over the top here, but in my opinion, Ms Young struck the perfect balance of small, delicate beadwork attached to the dress, and the pattern she chose for it adds a bit of a whimsical look to the dress that I don’t think we would see with a more flat or one-dimensional strand of beads.

But the beadwork, while impressive, is not my favorite feature of this dress–it’s the lacework! Take a look more closely at Ms Denton’s chest and shoulders. There is some really beautiful, delicate, elaborate lacework that has been added to take the dress from amazing to spectacular. Lace is very difficult to work with, and even more difficult to incorporate into a costume because it is by nature delicate. One wrong move, and it will just absolutely shred. Using it in this dress was a little risky, given the intense movement that goes on throughout this production, but in my considered opinion, it’s a risk that absolutely paid off. The addition of the lace really takes this dress to another level, and even without the other costumes in this production, Ms Young’s nomination for a Tony was well-deserved (and, again, there is a very good case for a win there).

I’ve had a chance now to look at a few of Paloma Young’s designs, and I am absolutely in love with them. Being able to look in depth at a few of her designs both in The Great Comet and Bandstand, I am a real admirer of how she uses fabrics and cuts to tell a story. The story I see here, in both the coat and the White Dress, is one of evolution. This young, innocent character is finally starting to come into her own as a result of the events in the musical, and her costuming reflects that. There is an innocence and purity to the dress, yes, but there are also design elements that hint to the audience that change is coming for Natasha. The country girl has gone city, and with that she’s starting to become someone else–someone, perhaps, she was always meant to be. That’s not an easy effect to have through costuming, and it’s one that I think deserves to be appreciated and admired.

Once again, thank you to Paloma Young for these visually stunning and meaningful costumes!

That wraps up today’s review of Natasha’s costumes in The Great Comet. Given the reception the last piece got, I’ll mix a couple more reviews of Paloma Young’s designs into my rota for the blog, with Helene and Anatole both high on my list as deserving some analysis.

As always, dear readers, if you have thoughts, comments, or feedback, please do not hesitate to drop me an Ask or send me a message on here or my main blog. Stay tuned for more from the beautiful world of Broadway costumes!

Ritual To Invite Spirit Contact

This spell is designed to let a specific spirit know that you are open to communication. It includes protective elements to avoid attracting negative entities.

*It is important to research the side effects of herbs before coming into contact with them. One should also keep in mind their personal allergies and medications taken when ingesting herbs. Your safety is more important than an ingredient.*


  • Dried Rose Hip (2 or more)
  • Clove incense
  • Dandelion (one stem and flower)
  • Mint leaf or scent, in any natural form
  • An item that relates to the spirit you wish to contact
  • A Brown or White candle


  • Light your Clove incense and your candle.
  • Sit with your item in your hand. Rub it clockwise.
  • Picture the spirit as you know it in your mind. Verbalize your openness to receiving communications (if you are unable to verbalize this or do not feel comfortable you can think it instead).
  • Take your rose hip and dandelion. Wrap them together (with string or cloth). Bury them under your doorstep (if you do not have a traditional doorstep you can put it on your porch, hang it in your doorway, or bury it by an entrance).
  • Leave a window or door open (it could be slightly open or fully open) for one hour.
  • Be sure to pay attention to little signs and happenings after performing this ritual and be sure to try and remember your dreams!

This spell is dedicated to my Grandmother, Marie, who I never had the chance to meet during her short time on earth. I hope to see you someday.

Superstore ramble

I guess the best word to describe the last episode of Superstore for me is - bittersweet. 

I loved it, i honestly loved it. I think it was amazing season finale, gracefully walking the line between fun and serious.

A few comments before I’ll turn into my Amy x Jonah ramble:

1. I just want to say that I really love Glenn. When I started this show he was annoying the hell out of me, but with time he found a way into my heart. And I just can’t help to find it really endearing how much he cares about his employees. Bless his kind soul.

2. Garret wants Dina to care about him! And Dina actually listens to him, which I find quite surprising, since Dina don’t listen to anybody. I don’t know if I ship them romantically yet, but damn I dig their relationship.

3. Sandra helping everyone to hide and closing the doors right in front of that bitch’s face! Good for you, Sandra!

4. I lost it at the scene where “The Final Countdown” was playing while tornado was hitting and dude with razors. Superstore customers wee at their best this episode.

5. Don’t even tell me that Brett is dead, find him show! Don’t joke like that.

Now let’s talk about Amy and Jonah, kids. Because damn this episode was so good for us.

Okay so first of all Garrets face when Jonah was telling him about all that wedding incident is so me. I also had that stupid smug grin on my face, when Jonah was trying to explain himself. And when he was trying to make ‘sexy’ work as casual word. Ahhh, classic Jonah, what a cute idiot.

But of course it was not what made me go all ADVNSJVDFLBJDGLKBJ during this episode and it was not even the kiss (even tho i was internall screaming during it). What I loved the most in this episode was that little shift in Amy and Jonah relationship, that was shown to us. Let me explain myself here.

From the very beginning we were shown that Jonah cares about Amy, he wants her happy, he suports and respects her. And I’m sure Amy’s aware of this too. Now she even knows for sure there is an element of attraction in all that (lmao how did you missed all that heart eyes he was sending your way all the time, amy?). But before this episode we always saw Jonah being there for her when, theoretically, she could handle situation by herself. He was her support (very welcome, but not not necessarily needed), but he was never the a crutch to lean on. Not untill now. 

Correct me if I’m wrong, guys, but this was the first time when we saw Amy reaching for Jonah both physically (taking his hand,when she’s afraid; kissing him) and emotinally. Maybe the emotional part wasn’t so prominent, but I read all this “We’re gonna die here”, “- So I’ll just keep talking? - Okay”, “You suck at being comforting” as “ Reassure me”, “Please talk, this will calm me”,  “No, you’re doing it wrong, do it the right way”. Amy was losing it, Amy was affraid and she needed someone to be there for her, to keep her sane. She needed someone who could at least pretend that they are calm and make her believe that everything gonna be okay.

And here comes the scene, that ended me

They way he said that, the way his voice sounded at that moment. So confident, so calm, so promising, so intimate, so… dare I say… sexy. (Ben Feldman what are you doing to me?) I think Amy actually believed him her. YOU GUYS, I THINK HERE IN THIS MOMENT WAS THE FIRST TIME WHEN AMY SAW JONAH NOT AS ‘COLLEGE BOY’ BUT AS A  MAN. She finally saw a partner in him and trust me, she won’t be able to unsee it now. THAT was the shift I was talking about. 

As gentle and silly and cute he is most of the time, now Amy also sees Jonah as someone who can protect her if she needed that, if she ask for that. He pulled her to his chest to hug and hide from tornado, just saying! And I think this is one of the reasons she kissed him. She finally snaped, she finally solved her Jonah - puzzle. Now she sees the whole picture and what she’s looking at is exactly what she needs and what she wants.

But they will take their time, getting there, right?

Because, even tho Amy was sure her marriage is over during last episode, we know it’s not exactly tru. Not yet. This kind of things don’t end so quickly. In this episode we saw that she and Adam still care for each other. They do, and it’s perfectly fine. I think they’ll always care for each other in some way, that kind of bond don’t just disappear, espesially when you have a child together. So I can easily see Amy and Adam giving their relationship one more chance in s3. For the sake of their family, for the sake of Emma. 

But now it would me even harder for Amy. Because it may have been okay to live in a marriage without love before, but it would be so much worse to do it, while falling for someone else.

And Jonah. Oh my poor Jonah. He now has his heart officially broken. because just for a second he held everything he wanted in his arms and that he had it swept right back away. But hang on there, buddy. She’ll come around.

                                            “I’ll come around
                                    If you ever want to be in love
                           I’m not waiting, but I’m willing if you call me up
                                 If you ever want to be in love
                                           I’ll come around”

                                                                                   - Jonah Simms, probably

Anyone else notice Iris West really isn’t Barry Allen’s type? The only woman he’s dated who is similar to Iris is Linda, (though Linda was sweet and wasn’t a bitch like Iris). But Linda and Iris are both reporters, both weren’t into science, weren’t nerdy, etc. Notice how Barry and Linda’s relationship really didn’t go anywhere? Part of that was due to Iris’s meddling with it, but another part was the fact that while they got along really well, they didn’t really click romantically. So, let’s look at the two women Barry has dated whom he really did click with romantically: Felicity and Patty. Both of these women were smart, nerdy, into science, sweet, and a little awkward, kind of like Barry is himself. Barry got along really well with these two girls because they were both into the same stuff, both into science, were both really sweet… Barry clicked with these women. They were his type. Iris is the exact opposite of these two. She doesn’t know science, she’s not sweet at all, she’s a bitch, and she’s not nerdy; she makes fun of Barry for being nerdy. Iris has proven that she finds Barry boring considering her yawning on their first date while he’s talking about work. They have literally nothing in common and they are not each other’s types. Barry’s type is the sweet, adorable nerd, similar to himself, whereas Iris’s type seems to be someone with big muscles and is one of those ‘hero types’. She dated Eddie, a buff cop, Oliver is on her three list and she thought he was even hotter once she found out he was the Green Arrow. I bet the only reason Iris is with Barry other than “destiny” is because he’s the Flash. If it weren’t for the fact that Barry is a hero and risks his life and she thinks that’s hot, she would never be with him. If he was just nerdy Barry Allen, she wouldn’t give him a second glance. These two are so mismatched. There’s opposites attract, and then there’s “what the hell”? But you know who is Barry’s type and is currently on the Flash? Caitlin. She’s smart, nerdy, sweet, and a scientist, all things the two of them have in common. They have the opposites attract element in speed and cold are opposites and where Barry is more optimistic and Caitlin more pessimistic, causing them to balance each other out just enough that they have things in common yet still have their differences. Whereas Barry and Iris are polar opposites and are in no way made for each other, soul mates, the “golden standard”, or any other bullshit the WA fandom and the writers try to cram down our throats. Trust me when I say a relationship like WestAllen would not work out in real life. They probably wouldn’t even be friends in real life they have so little in common.

Tropea, Calabria. The 780 km of coastline make Calabria a popular tourist destination in summer. Low industrial development and the lack of large cities mean that there’s only minimal marine pollution. The region is considered by many a natural paradise, which attracts tourists from all over Italy. Foreign tourism is still low, but it’s a growing market. The most popular seaside destinations are Tropea, Capo Vaticano, Pizzo, Scilla, Diamante, Amantea, and Soverato. The interior of Calabria is rich in history, traditions, art, and culture. Fortresses, castles, churches, historic centers, and cemeteries are common elements. Some mountain locations attract tourists even in winter. Sila and Aspromonte are 2 national parks that offer facilities for winter sports, especially in the towns of Camigliatello, Lorica, and Gambarie. 

The cuisine is a typical southern Italian Mediterranean cuisine with a balance between meat dishes (pork, lamb, goat), vegetables (esp eggplant), and fish. Pasta is also important. In contrast to most other Italian regions, Calabrians have traditionally placed an emphasis on the preservation of food, in part due to the climate and potential crop failures. As a result, there is a tradition of packing vegetables and meats in olive oil, making sausages and cold cuts (Sopressata, ‘Nduja), and curing fish, esp. swordfish, sardines and cod. Desserts are typically fried, honey-sweetened pastries or baked biscotti-type treats. Local specialties include Caciocavallo cheese, Cipolla rossa (red onion), Frìttuli and Curcùci (fried pork), Liquorice (liquirizia), Lagane e Cicciari (pasta with chickpeas), Pecorino Crotonese (sheep’s cheese), and Pignolata. Some vineyards have origins dating back to the ancient Greek colonists. Important grape varieties are red Gaglioppo and white Greco. Producers are resurrecting ancient grape varieties which have been around for as long as 3000 years.

anonymous asked:

What is peaophilia if it's not a disease? I'm serious, I would like to know.

[Trigger Warning: Pedophilia, Necrophilia, Cannibalism, Rape, Abuse, Sexual Violence] 

Pedophilia is a paraphilia. There are other paraphilias similar to pedophilia in one way or another. For example, another age based paraphilia is Gerontophilia– attraction to elderly. There are also many paraphilias that relate to dominance, power, and rape. For example Necrophilia is to rape a deceased person. Anthropophagolagnia is desiring to rape and cannibalize someone. 

Most paraphilias have to do with a conceptual or emotional idea rather than individuals which is one of the main things that distinguishes it from other forms of attraction. For example, a necrophiliac would not be attracted to the same person if they were still alive, because they are not attracted to the person so much as they are the idea of assaulting and defiling a deceased person. 

Same with pedophiles. They would not be attracted to the same person if that person was an adult, it is the age of the person specifically, and their ideas surrounding innocence and purity and power that is the main element of sexual attraction. 

It is not necessarily a problem of psychology or disease so much as it is a deeply held problem in values. Pedophilia, as far as I’m concerned, is intrinsically linked to abuse, and indeed multiple studies have shown correlation between men abusing their spouses and sexually abusing their children. 

“Multiple studies have established the high overlap between battering and incest perpetration (Herman, 1981; McCloskey et. al.; Paveza; Sirles and Franke; and Truesdell et. al.). These studies, taken together, indicate that a batterer is about four to six times more likely than a non-batterer to sexually abuse his children. These statistics are in line with studies of batterers’ risk to physically abuse children; the largest study of this kind showed batterers seven times more likely than non-batterers to frequently hit their children (Straus) About half of incest perpetrators also batter the children’s mother (Herman, 1981; Sirles and Franke; Truesdell). A recent major publication on family violence recommended that any history of sexual assaults against the mother be treated as a warning sign of possible sexual or physical abuse of the children (American Psychological Association).” 

The Connection Between Batterers and Child Sexual Abuse Perpetrators

Pedophiles engage with this paraphilia not because they’re unable to confront their extremely harmful values and beliefs, but because they’re unwilling to. The same reasons that abusers continue to abuse their partners, the same reasons serial rapists continue to sexually assault others– pedophiles continue to engage in the fantasy or practice of sexually assaulting and abusing children. 

Many pedophiles will say, in protest of this, that the fantasy is an imaginary willing or consenting child, but that is actually completely in line with abusive thought. (Not to mention, even the notion of a consenting child is completely and deeply wrong.)  

Consider this relevant passage from Judith Herman’s Trauma and Recovery: 

“His ultimate goal appears to be the creation of a willing victim.” 

This is an element of almost every form of abuse, control, and oppression imaginable. It’s highly dangerous and highly disturbing. 

The reason that it’s dangerous to assert that pedophilia is a disease is because this mythology (largely created and perpetuated by pedophiles and abusers themselves) contributes to a pedophilia apologist and CSA apologist culture wherein we are expected to extend sympathy to the perpetrators of this violence, and we are expected to forgive them or grant allowances to “non-offending” members because of the false notion that it isn’t their “fault” or that there is no “cure.” 

But it’s important to realize that these desires are prompted by their values and their behaviors are chosen, consciously. We need to hold these people accountable. It is not a disease or an orientation or any other excuse that allows pedophiles to insist it’s “out of their control.” Pedophiles are not inhuman monsters and they aren’t victims. They are people who desire to, and sometimes make the decision to, sexually abuse children. This is how we need to think of them. 

The only thing that has a chance of getting abusers to stop is by holding them accountable relentlessly. 

anonymous asked:

your askbox seems crowded with johnroxycallie asks today. welllll sorry im going to add another one to the pile! i am intrigued! i used to ship johnroxy because it seemed real & cute but i moved to roxycallie when it was canon. but this is interesting?? sooo im interested but not sold. give me your best sales pitch for this new ot3 and adopt me into that good good 4 person fold?

Okay here’s why I like it.

To start you have to understand my salty relationship with Roxy’s bisexuality. I basically wrote my own god damn narrative for it in my own head because I am just so over homestuck’s completely unwillingness to give women arcs relating to their sexuality. Womens’ queerness is always something treated by the narrative as obvious and unworthy of commentary or exploration or any element of revelation/self-discovery or even an iota of reflection or struggle, which is especially FRUSTRATING when they’ve been shown struggling with the queerness of OTHERS. It’s that last part that gets me w Roxy – I especially hate this with Roxy specifically because her relationship with Dirk was so very fucking fraught with her being bitter at him for being gay and thus unwilling to be with her. Roxy was aggressive about her attraction to Jake and Dirk and I would have really liked to see SOMETHING about like. The narrative there after she meets Callie, especially when Callie expressly tells Roxy that her species can’t experience human romance and blah blah blah blah there are so many things I would have loved to know more about re Roxy and her sexuality but this post is already going to be long so enough said about how mad I am about this specifically

The way I’ve settled on it for my own peace of mind is that Roxy went after Dirk and Jake most aggressively because she had the “save the human species” thing held up as the banner of like, the most important thing she could do to the exclusion of most else. Couple that with her being upset at Dirk for being gay and you get a workable explanation for her suppressing her own bisexuality and being so exuberantly performatively straight. 

So. Callie is the only person outside the other alpha kids that Roxy has had this lifelong close relationship/bond with. They have a conversation where they basically gal pal each other aggressively, with Callie saying her species can’t do redrom/human romance and Roxy being cagey about whether she’d reciprocate because Callie is basically telling her there’s no point to the thought exercise and who likes rejection?? but Roxy is the one who brings it up and is clearly fishing to see if Callie likes her likes her and blah blah blah people have been shipping RoxyCallie long before credits video because of all this, the ring, etc. The closeness of their relationship and the mutual “if only this could work it could be so good” narrative there like all right. 

Then, John. There’s an element to Roxy’s attraction to John that’s rooted in that instinctive thing she has going on that you can see on display in their first meeting, where she sees A Dude and immediately does her mental calculus to determine hey here is A Dude, he’s kind of cute, he’s maybe not gay and/or off-limits b/c my best friend has a huge messy crush on him. And it would be real easy to weigh the scales here and go full RoxyCallie if that were the sum and parts of their relationship, but like, here’s the thing – it’s not. 

I just cannot let go of John and Roxy as the sole survivors of the Game Over timeline. Roxy is Callie’s beacon of optimistic hope, Roxy is the one who acts to save Callie and preserve her in the alpha timeline (with John’s help – John gives Roxy the ring after all. I like that detail in the full scope of them being a Unit in the future.) But JOHN plays that role for Roxy. Roxy watches Rose die and is ready to sit down and throw in the towel. She tells John straight up that her only plan going forward after this is to accept her fate and bury her mom and wait for her miserable doomed timeline to end and take her with it. John is the one who convinces her there might be a better way, there might be hope. JOHN is the one who acts to preserve Roxy’s existence in the alpha timeline. I really love the parallel between Roxy bringing Callie back from the brink of oblivion and John bringing Roxy back from the same via the same mechanism that allows John to get the ring that allows Roxy to bring Callie back in the first place. That is a really tidy loop and I like it a lot.

So, Roxy in Earth C with a boy she likes and has a connection with that literally no one else can understand because no one else went through Game Over, no one else has this dissonant experiences that might not mesh 100% with the people they love, no one else has this potential imposter syndrome. I love the idea of Roxy and John bonding over that and have never really been willing to give it up. I love the idea of Roxy coming to understand that her infatuation with the idea of A Boy, Any Boy and the future she wanted so bad were products of trauma and really examining that and then realizing she fell for John legitimately, that she genuinely finds him charming

Simultaneously, Roxy in Earth C with the alien girl she’s had a crush on for like probably forever, and now she’s free of the burden she always assumed she had to repopulate the human race. Also her entire family is queer and she’s free to explore her own feelings with that context. Maybe to accept that her feelings for Jane were never purely platonic (and her feelings for Callie certainly never were) and half her frustration at Dirk was that he insisted on being “true” to himself while Roxy never felt she could be and imposed straightness on herself out of obligation to the human race. That could make a girl bitter, right? (I have so many god damn feelings about Roxy and Dirk reconciling post-canon)

And here’s Callie with her insistence that cherubs can’t experience redrom, too. Except now she’s living on Earth C with, for example, Karkat, a troll who absolutely experiences romantic feelings the same way humans do despite all his species lore stating Trolls Can’t Feel Like That. And now Callie has eternity to explore HER feelings – and we know part of why Callie just accepted that she couldn’t experience flushed/human romance is because she didn’t think anyone would ever love her like that anyway, right? She thought she was hideous and unloveable. Well now she’s here on Earth C and there’s no way Roxy is going to go on letting her believe that. And without that holding her back from exploring the way she REALLY feels, you can see a path to Callie allowing herself to experience emotions she never thought she could. 

And all of these are positive things and wonderful things for these people to learn about themselves and about each other. 

Roxy caught between the boy she fell for on her journey and the girl she fell for long before her journey even started, just having this realization like, everyone is doing what they want here, this is our universe and our earth and our society and our rules, and she’s kind of unofficially dating them both for awhile but not committing labels-wise to either until eventually she’s just like fuck it??? Here’s how I feel, now how about you??? And I cannot imagine Callie protesting Roxy loving them both or someone else loving Roxy as much as she does, and John’s relationship with romance throughout Homestuck is so bemused and ???? and exploratory, I imagine he’s like well this is kinda weird is this like a troll thing and Roxy is like no this is just an us thing and they deal with it

John and Callie have already been spending tons of time with each other throughout and again, as I referenced in an earlier post, there’s some initial awkwardness that settles out into a balanced arrangement and Callie and John both love Roxy and care about each other very much.

Also like, until there actually is some kind of epilogue that does more with John’s current depression arc and ties in the Masterpiece with everything, I like this alternate reality where John has someone who understands him in a way really no one else can there for him when his shit starts to go south, I like the idea of there being an entire long ass subplot where John tries to isolate himself and Roxy is instrumental in not allowing that to happen, I like Callie’s cheer in the face of her own blisteringly unforgiving history and reality being an inspiration for John, I like a lot of things that canon as it stands doesn’t have a satisfying character-driven arc for at the moment.

And, you know, to cap all this off, I really just like JohnRoxyCallie as an acknowledgement that bisexual woman are not “less” for liking boys, that bisexual woman don’t “count” unless they are exclusively with women, and that bisexual people in real life who ship bisexual characters with people of opposite/other genders are not somehow betraying the queer community by doing so, while simultaneously not sacrificing a potential f/f romance for a m/f one.

The LGBT community’s relationship with bisexual women is MY pet issue, because obviously I’m a bi woman, and there’s obviously an element of that going on as well. It bothers me with the treatment of a lot of fandom/homestuck’s bisexual women (this frenzy by queer fandom to erase every relationship a bisexual woman ever had with a man as being not real or not valid for x, y, z reasons while Straight Fandom is over there doing the same thing, but opposite) but Roxy is by far the Homestuck Canon Bisexual Woman I personally care about the most so SHRUG that’s why you get a million words of my feelings

Anyway that’s why I like them

It makes sense how the hosts elements effect their relationships. I might be reaching with this but this is what I’ve picked up:

-Maggie (plant elemental) is attracted to Gil (water elemental).

-Odin, who has a fear of water, doesn’t care for Gil.

-Ava (fire elemental) seems to not be able to get along with Maggie (plant) because of how she hurts her.