eleanor douglas

Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell

“Nothing before you counts,“ he said. ”And I can’t even imagine an after.“

She shook her head. "Don’t.”

“What?”

Don’t talk about after.”

“I just meant that… I want to be the last person who ever kisses you, too…. That sounds bad, like a death threat or something. What I’m trying to say is, you’re it. This is it for me.”

headcanon

i don’t think the three words eleanor wrote park were “i love you”. it’s such a sensitive subject to her, and she abstained from saying it all this time - it’s not like her.

no, i think it was something else. something that was so irrestibly eleanor to park, something that linked them inextricably together, right from the start.

the final watchmen comic came out after she left. he wondered what she thought of it, never even doubting that she was still reading it. and i bet she knew that. so what do i think those three words were, that made park smile, made him feel like “something heavy and winged took off his chest”?

the ending sucked.

4

list of favorite characters:

I don’t like you, Park. Sometimes I think I live for you. I don’t think I even breathe when we’re not together. Which means, when I see you on Monday morning, it’s been like sixty hours since I’ve taken a breath. That’s probably why I’m so crabby, and why I snap at you. All I do when we’re apart is think about you, and all I do when we’re together is panic. Because every second feels so important. And because I’m so out of control, I can’t help myself. I’m not even mine anymore, I’m yours, and what if you decide that you don’t want me? How could you want me like I want you?