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EVERYTHING I NEED TO KNOW I LEARNED FROM MEAN GIRLS

Possibly the most quotable movie of our generation, Mean Girls celebrates its 10th anniversary today (WTF WE ARE OLD.) 

In honor of this fetch movie, here is what Mean Girls taught me about life.

 HOW TO SMOOTHLY ESCAPE AWKWARD SITUATIONS

 JOURNALING IS A REALLY GREAT WAY TO DEAL WITH YOUR FEELINGS

THE BEST WAY TO CELEBRATE THE BIRTH OF CHRIST IS WITH SEXY DANCING.

IT’S IMPORTANT TO WATCH WHAT YOU EAT

…BUT YOU HAVE TO INDULGE EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE

ITS OK TO LIE ABOUT BEING SICK IF YOU REALLY SELL IT

STICKING TO YOUR OWN CONVICTIONS IS IMPORTANT, EVEN IF IT MEANS STANDING UP TO SOMEONE MORE POWERFUL THAN YOU

IF SOMEONE IS BOTHERING YOU, JUST MISTAKE THEM FOR A BALDING CELEBRITY

HAVING SEX INCREASES YOUR CHANCE OF DEATH 100%

AND EVEN THOUGH I’LL NEVER BE AS COOL AND POPULAR AS GLEN COCO

I CAN STILL TRY TO MAKE FETCH WORK

Everything I need to know I learned from 10 things I hate about you

1. There’s a perfect match for everyone.

Even if you are the misunderstood rebel chick or the ultimate “good guy who’s also a bit of a nerd” you can be sure that somewhere out there, somebody is going to like you for exactly who you are.

Sometimes is easy and unexpected and some other times it’s hard and it takes time because the girl/guy you like has to date some jerk first (or many of them) to realize that you are the one that was perfect for him/her all along… But hey, it’s worth the wait. I mean, even Michael and Mandella ended up together, there’s hope you guys, for all of us.

2. Good guys do finish last

Especially in high school when popular girls have the chance to choose between many guys that worship them, it’s not usual that they’re gonna pick the cute goodie one over the sexy popular one.

Sadly, this behavior doesn’t end at high school and it’s not exclusive of popular girls, some of us regular, not-so-worshiped girls tend to choose the bad boy that WE KNOW is gonna end up hurting us than the geeky best friend that has been there for us all along.

3. Good guys win at the end

However, there’s good news for all the good guys in the world. Most girls get tired of getting hurt and of guys that treat them badly, so of course, we look again around us and realize that the good guys were always the best choice we had.

There’s a point in life that cocky boys start to seem just that -BOYS - and we start looking for a man that’s responsible and nice and that treat us right, and we do stick with those, not with the bad ones.

4. A little “sacrifice in the altar of dignity” goes a long way

There’s nothing more romantic than a gesture that screams “hey I’m doing this shit I normally would NEVER do just for you”

Probably if you would’ve ask Kat if she would like some guy to sing “Can’t take my eyes off of you” for her in the bleachers of the football field she would’ve probably said no, buuuuuut she appreciates the gesture because she knew Patrick was risking his reputation for her. I mean, we all fell in love with him at that particular scene of the movie for one reason.

5. Whatever is that you are going through, you are not the first one

Obviously, one of the most iconic moments of the movie is when Kat reads her poem out loud in front of all of her class. That dark scary girl just sharing her feelings in plain daylight.

That poem is just her own version of Shakespeare’s “141 sonnet” and that was published in 1609!, what I’m trying to say is that many of the stories wrote many years ago are still up to date and are very enlightening especially for people like Kat and I that are not very “in touch” with our emotions. Seriously, I recommend some reading, it’s really amazing to find people having the same problems you have, just centuries earlier.

6. “Friendships” are not forever

Do you ever look back and think of all those people you used to be so close to and that you never see or speak to anymore?

Friendships are not forever… when we’re growing up we hang out with pretty much everyone that wants to hang out with us and we start calling those people our best friends, but as we grow up we realize we didn’t have much in common with them to begin with and start drifting apart. And it hurts, but then the pain goes away and you don’t even remember those people more than once in a lifetime. That’s how you know you never needed them.

Or sometimes you just realize they’re horrible people, like that Chastity, ugh.

7. Don’t let anybody ever tell you that you don’t deserve what you want

This one brought to us by our own Patrick Verona: “See first of all, Joey is not half the man you are. Secondly, don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want. Go for it.”

I don’t think that this needs further explanation. Thank you Patrick Verona.

BONUS. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is the most perfect man ever

I am part of the minority that always preferred Cameron over Patrick, I clearly like Patrick too (A LOT) but Cameron was just, perfect. Of course I didn’t know it back then but JGL grew up to be one sexy specimen so now I feel proud to remember how I loved him with passion even when he was an awkward teenager.

I even think that I built my “type” in guys around Cameron James, cute baby face, almost too skinny to stand in his own feet who’s a bit of a nerd and a hopeless romantic. Yes, I’m 23 and I still think he’s the guy I want… so I live with very high expectations that are probably never going to be fulfilled.