There might be a day I will write this into a full blown fic but for now I just had to get the thought out of my head.

The 5 times Wade Wilson proposed to Peter Parker and the one time Peter said yes:

1.
“Are you proposing to my butt?”
“If it’ll have me.”

2.
“You know how I’m Canadian?”
“Sure.”
“Well, it looks like I might be deported unless you marry me.”
“No.”
“Oh come on! Be the Ryan Reynolds to my Sandra Bullock. And I wish you understood the irony of that!”
“First of all, you could never pull off Sandra B. And second, you’re a mercenary, the fact that the government even knows where you are and could contact you must mean you’re slipping up.”
“Take that back!”

3.
“Can you grant a dying man’s last wish?”
“Wade, you don’t die.”
“Just my final request.”
“Fine.”
“Marry me.”
“You’re ridiculous.”

4.
“Marry me.”
“Get out of my house.”

5.
“Stop proposing!”
“Oh come on Spidey, I’m just playing around.”
“Exactly!”
“What?”
“Forget it.”

+1.
“Holy shit!”
“Oh my Mr. Parker! If I knew you had a mouth like that on you. My delicate sensibilities!”
“Wade! Are you serious?”
“Always have been.”
“No take backs?”
“Never.”