egg puns

The Soufflaté

Today… Sarah and Emily tackled the arduous task of crafting a cheese soufflé. Hence why we called it the soufflaté (the Soufflé date). Here are some highlights from the ordeal that the paparazzi took.

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We are not very good at separating eggs, this is a picture of an egg yolk that got brutally murdered by Emily’s inexperienced hands. At least it was funny and the process made us all CRACK up! Sarah, on the other hand, was EGGcelent. 

We then took a STUNNING, oscar worthy time lapse of us over whisking our eggs, but unfortunately neither of us know how to embed a video into a text post, so you will just have to be sad about that. We ALSO took an incredible video of Sarah expertly folding the egg whites into the rest of the mixture, but that was also a time lapse that we can’t figure out how to put in. So just imagine what those two look like. Sorry for any distress we may have caused. 

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This is a table. Emily cut up fruit for Sarah, and some friends that decided to crash our party (@ccgg112 :))

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And this is the gorgeous and delicious final product! It actually looks like a soufflé! And none of us have died from salmonella yet! We’re going to call this a win for us. 

Please put us on Great British Baking Show.

We love you, Mary Berry. 

Eat your heart out, Paul Hollywood.

Historically, when humans have sought a reliable source of calories – particularly one that can be readily nabbed from an unsuspecting animal with minimal exertion and zero horticulture skills – we have often turned to eggs.

We’ve pilfered the ova of countless creatures since Neolithic times. But it is the nutritive and symbolic capacities of the humble bird egg, primarily that of the chicken, that we have most consistently championed: reliable nourishment, a hangover cure, an emblem of rebirth — when necessary, a supreme projectile.

Yet in the late 1970s, our egg appreciation soured. Doctors realized that excess cholesterol in our blood predicts a higher risk of heart disease. Cholesterol is a fatty substance necessary for digestion, cellular function and the production of hormones. When too much of it shuttles through our blood supply, it can accumulate on artery walls and up our risk for heart attack and stroke. By extension, many physicians of the day assumed that eating high-cholesterol foods like butter, red meat and eggs was probably disastrous for our health and should be avoided. Fat phobia ensued.

We now know it’s more complicated than this.

Unscrambling The Nutrition Science On Eggs

Photo: Kelly Jo Smart/NPR

You’ve all met mochi Germany before. But greet our new friend, Deitschland, or Germeggy, in English. 

As you can see he’s perfect. An eggcellent nation and example to follow. 
He only dances to traditional yolkas, and sings the yolk songs of his people. A bit hard boiled, he’s a tough one to crack.

((Askbloggers, please follow this trend and dra w ur characters as eggs. because I’m crying hes beautiful. Everything I’ve ever wanted.))

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“Can we have a punny caption with all of the components of the tarts in it?” -asked no one.

HONEY, I FIGURED OUT WHY THESE TARTS ARE SO GOOD,” said I.

“IT’S BECAUSE I SPENT 8 HOURS AND TWO BATCHES DEVELOPING THE RECIPE, HANDMAKING THEM FROM SCRATCH, AND YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE HOW BUTTERY THE DOUGH IS-”

Ahem. In other words, everyone, these are:

Honey custard fig tarts, with fresh figs from the garden,

smooth, creamy custard sweetened with honey, and buttery, buttery flaky crust.

Easter Eggs

You weren’t sure what you had expected from your first Easter with Shawn, but it certainly wasn’t what you got.  “Today’s an eggs-tra special day, Y/N!” Shawn declared as he walked into the kitchen while you were eating breakfast.  You rolled your eyes at the pun.  “Very funny, Shawn.  Why don’t you eat something?” You suggested.  He shuffled over to the fridge, grabbed the carton of eggs that hadn’t been dyed or decorated, and got the other mix-ins for an omelette.  “You know, you should be careful when you’re cooking, the stove can get eggs-tremely hot.” He joked.  “I’m not going to egg you on.” You fired back, not one to be beaten in a pun war.  “Are you scrambling to find better ideas, Y/N?”  “Shawn, if you don’t cut it out, I’ll smack you sunny-side up the head.”  You warned him.  You just wanted to eat your cinnamon roll in peace.  Shawn just chuckled, and, in a mock-begrudging tone, added “You’ve got to be yolk-ing.”  He flipped the omelette over in the pan, waiting for your comeback.  “Oh, so now I’ve got to walk on eggshells, huh?” You challenged. “Nah, that would be over-easy.” He replied, with a sly grin, as he stuffed a bite of the omelette into his mouth.  “Don’t tease me too much, Shawn, or your Easter basket might end up getting poached.” You warned him.  At the mention of the Easter basket, his eyes lit up.  “You made me an Easter basket this year?” Shawn blurted, as excited as any little kid would have been at the thought.  “Of course, Shawn.  After all, Toblerone bars don’t exactly fit inside Easter eggs.”