Kelan ba huling tumibok ang puso mo?
Ang puso mo na dinurog ng una mong pag ibig
Una mong pag ibig na kala mo ay pang habang buhay na
Pang habangbuhay na walang sukuan at hindi bibitaw
Hindi ka bumitaw, ngunit sya ay dahan dahang nawala
Nawala, naghulagpos, nagpumilit kahit sobrang higpit
Higpit ng hawak mo sa pangako nyang napako
Napako, nalimot, nadala ng hangin, parang bangungot
Bangungot na sanay hindi na lang inumpisahan
Inumpisahang masaya, natapos na mag isa ka
Mag isa, malungkot, andaming tanong na bakit
Bakit nga ba? Hindi malaman ang sagot
Sagot ba eh ikaw ang nagkulang? O sumobra?
Sobra siguro dahil sinayang ka nya
Sinayang nya ang puso mong buong buo
Buo na puno ng pagmamahal, pang unawa, tiwala
Tiwalang ang halaga ay ang matamis mong oo
Oo na minsan ay sumagi sa isip mong hindi na lang
Hindi na lang sana kung ang kapalit ay luha
Luha na dulot ng sakit, hinanakit, pagkabigo
Bigo sa unang pag ibig, nakakadala, nakakatakot
Takot ng masaktan, maiwan, maguluhan
Magulo ang mundo ng pag ibig ngunit ano nga bang magagawa?
Ano nga ba kung asa harap mo na? Pipikit ka na lang ba?
Pipikit at hihintaying tumibok
Tibok na galing sa durog ngunit handang sumubok.
Hindi ako masaya. Hindi rin naman ako malungkot. Ang totoo, hindi ko alam ang saktong nararamdaman ko. Mahirap iexplain. At ayokong ientertain. Pero siguro, as long as okay naman yung mga taong asa paligid ko, okay na yun. Okay na siguro yun. Okay na yun.
“ok I was awfully cheap my rhino, and I don’t want to leave anything you..do you think if my will for you? YES but I am sick and i miss you and you’re not picking up your phone and I need to talk to you so the germs can transfer and you can be sick too. And I was gonna leave you a lot of voice messages but I remembered or realized the second time I’m doing this is that um it takes a while to ring.. to and and for it to go to your voicemail and I’m assuming your phone is on or something coz it doesn’t go right away so I’m just going to leave you really, really long voice messages not too many though just a couple coz I’m lying in bed and I’m sleeping cough and really bored and waiting for the nyquil to kick in except OH I haven’t taken it yet thatswhyithasn'tkickedin I’m going to get up, eat some nyquil and I’ll call you back okay.. anddd I kinda hope you don’t pick up so i can leave you longer voice messages. Like this one. I’m thinking maybe I’ll talk really slowly like. like. this. and. do. every. word. with. some. seconds. of. nothing. in. the. intervals. Actually don’t that’s boring. I’m getting bored just saying it. (coughing/dieing) okay Irin I’ll see you in a bit NORR not see you in a bit I’ll I’ll call back. Bye. herherher by the way this is sooyun”
This is the voicemail I have chosen to save in case sooyun dies and this will be the only way for me to listen to her voice again.