Well, I’m Buddy Garrity. I’ve owned businesses here in East Dillon for a long time. As you well know, Erica, you bought a Chevy Tahoe from me about three years ago. Sir, please, please. If you… if you don’t mind, please. I’ve known this young man since before he hit puberty. And this young man has done a lot of things wrong. I’ve seen him do a dozen things wrong, but let me tell you something right now. He is not a bad young man, and he’s certainly not a criminal. He doesn’t need to be in this system. He dated my daughter for years, and we took him in like family, so he’s like family to me. And I could tell you this kid right here has got more heart than almost any person I know. And I can promise you that when you let him out, he will have a full-time job working for me. And I can guarantee you that nothing like this will ever happen again. You have my word on that. It’s time for you to let Tim Riggins come home. Thank you.
Okay, you know what? I’m not here to solve all your problems, Garrity. I’m not. I’m here to support you no matter what choice you make, that’s why I’m here. I’m your boyfriend, and I think I’m a pretty darn good one. You know what? Your dad threw you a good curve ball. But this self-pity that I’ve been seeing, it’s gotta stop. You’re better than that. And you can still get into any college you want. Any one you want, still. … If you can’t afford it, there’s scholarships to be had, I mean, your grades speak for themselves. And you know what? If it doesn’t, there’s San Antonio State, and I would love to have you. Did I just say I loved you? Did I? No? ‘Cause I’m kinda madly in love with you, and I’ll be here no matter what.
Theater chain Alamo Drafthouse has a history of doing entertaining PSAs to shame people into behaving properly—there’s a whole “Don’t Talk” subchannel on the company’s YouTube page. Considering the Drafthouse started in Austin, it’s almost surprising it took this long to connect its videos to the greatest show ever filmed in that city, Friday Night Lights. But it has happened, with Kyle Chandler donning his Panthers blue—hmm, wouldn’t he have stayed at East Dillon?—to try to make another one of his inspirational speeches. It doesn’t go well.
So many people have warned me about getting into this with you. You know what I tell them? I tell them that they don’t know you like I do. I tell them that you’re a good guy. You are, right? You’re a good guy. Please don’t make a fool out of me.