f our, three, two,,,, fuck youa… listen up y;all,, this shit is ironic– sttrideers beats are best suie te d to ttrolls ho oked on phonix!!!! karkailicious definitioen makes teerezi locoa she wants to know the sec rets that she cant taste in my pphoto… dyion just to know the flavor i aiin;;;t doi n her no favors no reasons why I tease her flush just comes anddd goes like SEASONS. I’M karkalicious (ssso delicious ) no, i don;;t do kismesius….. and if u READ any fanfics all that shit is fictitiaous…. i blow ki sses (mwah!!!!) don t matter if wereo just moiraills trolls be liinin down the VEIL foar a chance tou fill a pail (four,,, three, two,, fuck you……) so delicious (super sweet) so delicious (fuckin;;; adorab loodthhhirsty) so delicious (even egbert wants aa piaeice o; me) im k arkailicioau s (l-l-l-l-like candy, candy) kairkaliacious def-,,,, k arkalicious def-,, karkaliciouu s def- (goddammiit,, doc scratch, stop fuckin arround with my mic -) karkaliacious definition makes the shippers crazy….. nepeta;s always squuealin; cuotesy pet names like karkitty im the k to thea a,, r, k,, the a,,, the t, and the maujority of pairi ngs had better include me i;;;m karkalicious (so delicious) my body stays vicious all the highbloods feelin;; nervousss cuz i;m doin some fit ness zahhak;s my witness (*whistlea*) bet that ship curls nepetas taoil and hell be needin all t he towels cuz i;mmmma make hiim sssweat pails (four,,,, three,,,, two,,,, fuck you……) so DELICIOUS (suuper sweettt) so delicious (fuckin adorabloodthirsty) so delicious (even eggbert wants a pieece o;;; me) i;;m karkalicious (n ow u noooksuckers hol d the fuck uppp,,, cheock it oaut) baby,,, baby, BABY, IF u really want me, honey get soime patience.. mayb e then youll get a taste…. i;;ll be t asty,,, tasty,,, illl be lace d with lacy,, it;;;s SO tasty,,, tast y,,, it;;;ll make u crazy…. t to the a,, to the s t y - fuckin tasty,,,, t toa the a to the s t y - fuckin;;; tasty d to the e, to the l i c i o u s,,,, to theu D, too the e, to the,,, ttto the,,, to the– ill just spell it out for YOU! ALL the time i turn around trrrolls gather rround always SNIFFIN’ at me, wanna ggguess the color of my blood… i just wanna s ay it now - i AIN’T tryin to round up any drama,,,, li ttle fucker i just don;;t want u to know….. aund i gue ss im comin ouff as just a little insecure although i kkkeep on repeatin how the secret;;s fuckin AWESOME. BUT i;;m tryin to tell, its a s ecret that i just don;;t wanna tell… ttterezi says i smell…….. delicious (so deliucious) no,, i don;;t do kismesis… and if u read ainy fanf ics all thatt shit is fictitious…. i blow kis ses (mwah!!!!) don;;t matter if we;;;r e just mmoiraills ttrrrolls be linin down the veil for A chancce toe FILL a pail four,,, thhhree,, two,,,, fuck you….. my body STAYS vicious zahhak;;;s been feelin nervous ;;;cuz i goit down to busssiness nepeota;;;s my witness (meow~!!!!! ) i;ll evennn let HER first ship sail just watch thait kittten be the first in line to f ill a pail so ddel icio us (er idan, SEE) SO delicious (u can trusttt me ) so delicious (i;;ll help u be) i;;;m KARKALICIOUS, l-l-like candy,,, candy iuts so delicious (a y, ay,,, ay,,, ay) so delicious (ay, ay, ay, ay) so delicious (ay,,, ay, ay,,,, ay) i;;;m karkaliciious,,, (she says my blood is like candy, candy) t to the a,,, to the s t y - fuckin; tasttty… t to the a,,, to the s t y - fuckint asty t ttto the a,,,, to tthe s t y - fuckin;; tasty…. t to the a, to the,,,, toa theo,,,, TO the,,,, to THE, to the, d to the e,, to the l i c i o u s, to the d,, to t he,, e to the,,, l i c i o u s,,,, to the d to the e,,, to the l i c i o u s,,, to the d, to THE e,,, to the– nowww, wait just a motherfuckin second!! do i seriously have tto spell this shhit until the end o f theu fuckin song?????? i mean,,,, w hoever fuckin wrote the original n ever had acceess to spellcheck i guess because ttt-a-s-t-e-y does not spell taesty… was this fergie douchhemuffion illiterate or soamething?????? what do u mmmean huma n rap artists are the only ones braveo enough to write their own grammatical trainwrecks and c all it music!!!???? w hat the fuck even is will smith doiing?? h e doesn;;; t thrrrow down sick firrress anymore!!!!????? fuck this shit, i quiit..


Imagine the Avengers in High School…

Tony Stark (Iron Man):

Everyo single student in school knew who Tony Stark was. He was the boy with the richest parents, drove the newest cars, threw the best parties and had had the most girlfriends. He was the guy who didn’t seem to care about school but got great grades anyways. With his cocky lines and good looks he had most girls swooning about him. But beneath that mask of the playboy was a boy who just wanted his father to notice him more and treat him like a son.

Clint Barton (Hawkeye):

Clint was the class clown. He would always pull pranks on both teachers and students, not caring about getting into trouble. He got away with it most of the times, even though no one was exactly sure why (but they suspected he used the vents). And even when he got into detention, he would turn it into the best detentions with his jokes. His funny and careless personallity made him an easy person to like. And also, when Clint threw paper balls at the teachers, he never seemed to miss…

Pietro Maximoff (Quicksilver):

Pietro was the kind of guy who liked his freedom and who would often skipp classes so that he would be able to sleep in. Somehow, even when everyone thought he would be too late, he would enter the classroom just in time. Pietro had a lot of one liners and pick up lines and that combined with his winks he would have many girls blushing.

Wanda Maximoff (Scarlett Wich):

Wanda was Pietro’s little sister and a sweet girl. She was a bit nerdy, loving to read and to learn new stuff, which made her a great tutor. Even though she was a bit awkward and clumsy, people really liked her. She usually walked around the school with a pile of books in her hands but sometimes ended up letting them fall.

Natasha Romanov (Black Widow):

Natasha Romanov was a mysterious, dangerously beautiful girl who every boy had a crush on but were too afraid to ask her out. Natasha wasn’t someone to girl out about things like fashion and make up and prefered to talk about martial arts.

Steve Rogers (Captain America):

Steve was a guy most girls were swooning over in secret. He was handsome, kind, good at sports and had good grades. But he wasn’t cocky at all, in fact he got a bit shy when people complemented him. He also was someone who would stand up against bullies, helping those who were the victims. Steve is also a great tutor.

Bucky Barnes (Winter Soldier):

Bucky Barnes was a bit of a mysterious guy. He wasn’t really the one to mingle much with other people and was usually a bit quiet and grumpy. But beneath that mask he was actually a sweet guy, with surprisingly good dance moves and pick up lines. His favourite subejct seems to be history…

Bruce Banner (Hulk):

Bruce was a bit the awkward scientist of the group. He was really clever and usually had the solution before the teacher did. This and his love for science made him and Tony great team buddies during assignments. Bruce also loved to read and to learn new things rather than hanging around people and tended to avoid stressful situations. Beside that, he was a sweet guy.

Thor Odinson:

Thor was the sportguy of the school. He blinked out in everything that had to do with sports and besides that he also had the good looks and the most muscles. It was nos ecret girls were swooning over him and he knew it. Except that, Thor sometimes could be a bit blunt, proud and obvious, but he was also a nice guy who even though he was really popular never picked on anyone.

(Gifs not mine)

anonymous asked:

more supercat? please? thank u

“no, alex, i know that but i think it’s a really good opportunity and i,” kara swallows her explanation when alex jumps right back into the same argument as always. half-listening, kara slumps and runs a finger over the rim of her glasses and presses the button for cat’s floor. she leans against the back of the elevator. she sighs very quietly and shakes her head, pushes back a strand of hair when it falls from her otherwise pristine bun. she tries hard to pull her awareness closer to her body—maybe if she listens better to alex, she can understand why this is such a big deal.

“more attention is exactly what you don’t need, kara,” alex finishes off, as always, and kara sighs.

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@badgalriri: Nobody in de world could mek me laugh di$ ra$$hole hard, Nobody cud talk a$ much cunt a$ you, Nobody cud keep my dirty lil $ecret$ like you, Nobody el$e cud embara$$ my $tyle….You literally make bitche$ wi$h they had an M.Forde by their side! I will never take for granted the day you packed your $hit and left BIM to come hold me down, cuz God know$ I would never be able to $urvive thi$ and remain my$elf through it all! You are literally the $trongest, $exie$t, most perverted, humble, kind, intelligent, $hady a$ PHUCK human being I know! My $i$tren!!! My hitta!!! I know I tell you thi$ all the time, but Money cud neva buy what you give me!! Our friend$hip will alway$ be family! Ya $weet a$ $ex!!! #MDollaz #April11 #HappyBirthday @mdollas11”

haruspicus  asked:

Hey there! You mentioned in your latest post that you expect Illyrio to have a coldness, cruelty, and cynicism beneath his jovial persona. Do you really think that's the case? Some coldness and cynicism must be present in order to orchestrate the fAegon scheme, but it seems that he genuinely loves the boy and his mother, and that the scheme is largely for their benefit, rather than his. I can't really imagine Illyrio being the sort of figure you described Dany running into in TWOW.

Hiya! Always so glad to hear from you.

To borrow, as is my wont, from madeinmyr: who is Illyrio Mopatis, and what does he want?

Well, he was a bravo once, strutting through the streets of Pentos with naught but his blade to his name. Tyrion glimpses a statue of young Illyrio, slim and graceful, while staying in the magister’s palace. Right there, we get a visual metaphor for the man: just as the flat-bellied killer is the seed from which the genial fat merchant sprang, so too can we glimpse a much scarier person behind the veil of Illyrio’s performative wit. (As I said in that post, he’s basically evil Wyman Manderly.)

He and Varys, a former “prince of thieves” forced to flee Myr for his life, hit on a classic con:

“Varys spied on lesser thieves and took their takings. I offered my help to their victims, promising to recover their valuables for a fee. Soon every man who had suffered a loss knew to come to me, whilst city’s footpads and cutpurses sought out Varys … half to slit his throat, the other half to sell him what they’d stolen.”

Here is established the Varys/Illyrio dynamic, which will hold as they graduate to Master and Magister, respectively. Varys is the talent behind the scenes; Illyrio is the public face of the operation. Varys is the craftsman, Illyrio the salesman. This division of labor necessarily engendered an aura of sophistication and charm in Illyrio, but also contempt for the rubes they fleeced:

“The older thieves were fools who thought no further than turning a night’s plunder into wine … [S]ecrets are worth more than silver or sapphires, Varys claimed. Just so. I grew so respectable that a cousin of the Prince of Pentos let me wed his maiden daughter…”

This cynical, dismissive attitude toward anyone he perceives as beneath his social and intellectual standing is central to Illyrio’s character. Now, one can improve one’s position in Illyrio’s eyes. Tyrion does so by demonstrating his intelligence, Daenerys does so by surviving and even thriving in the far East, where Illyrio thought she’d just die. But that only proves my point: for Illyrio, personhood is something that must be earned, and only a select elite are even in the running.

As you point out, two of those lucky few are Serra, his late wife, and Aegon, who’s probably their son. (I won’t recap that argument here.) But look at how he demonstrates that affection:

“I keep her hands in my bedchamber. Her hands that were so soft …”

Illyrio loved Serra as property, as a display, part of his identity performance. For him, what was lost when she died was his pleasure in feeling her soft hands. Sure, he declares he was willing to face social exclusion in order to wed Serra, but that feels like a humblebrag to me. I lost a lot of cachet, yet look how wealthy and powerful I remain! I can afford to fall hopelessly in love; it is a luxury for which I have paid. Similarly, as with Cersei and her kids, I believe Illyrio loves Aegon as an extension of himself, as if that statue were brought to life.

Indeed, that’s why he keeps that statue around: narcissism masked as nostalgia. I was a thin man then, because I was poor. Now I am rich, and so I eat myself into oblivion because I have slaves to carry me around in a litter. That is who Illyrio Mopatis is.

So what does he want? The fandom generally refers to Illyrio as Varys’ “partner,” yet their arrangement is not merely an equitable meeting of the minds. We think of Varys as the mastermind behind the conspiracy, and that may well be true, but Illyrio is the power broker in the relationship. Illyrio funds Varys’ ventures, provides him with spies, and acts as a middleman between Westeros and Essos, bringing Jorah, Barristan, Strong Belwas, and Tyrion into the Targ Restoration fold. Varys does all the dirty and dangerous work in the Red Keep, sleeping in a spartan cell, forever a careless word away from losing his head. Meanwhile, Illyrio lounges in his palace, (relatively) safe behind city walls and the narrow sea.

Varys tolerates this state of affairs because he is an arch-utilitarian true believer, as he has now twice revealed to dead men. Despite his own childhood mutilation, he’s willing to cut the tongues from his child spies because he believes he’s building them a better world. But Illyrio? It visibly amuses him to dodge the Braavosi-imposed ban on slavery in Pentos. He copes with his inconvenient lust for Dany by “vigorously” raping one of said slaves. He offers another woman to Tyrion as a sex slave (I’m sorry, “bedwarmer”), and declares that the dwarf may in fact “[c]hoose from amongst my servingwomen. None will dare refuse you.” Illyrio rapes and enslaves not for a cause (as horrific as that would be), but simply because he can.

Given that Illyrio’s rags-to-riches story has inspired in him not empathy but narcissism, his true parallel might not be his co-conspirator Varys, but rather Littlefinger. What the cheesemonger and the mockingbird want most is to prove that they were right to be so arrogantly ambitious, back when they had nothing. They were right to think they were the only people that mattered, that everyone else was theirs to cherish like a possession or dispose of like…well, a possession. Yet both will be undone by a young woman they thought they could control, only to find them seizing their own destiny, fighting back with the very weapons these horrible men had given them. In Sansa’s case, that weapon is information. For Dany, it’s dragons.

badgalriri: Nobody in de world could mek me laugh di$ ra$$hole hard, Nobody cud talk a$ much cunt a$ you, Nobody cud keep my dirty lil $ecret$ like you, Nobody el$e cud embara$$ my $tyle….You literally make bitche$ wi$h they had an M.Forde by their side! I will never take for granted the day you packed your $hit and left BIM to come hold me down, cuz God know$ I would never be able to $urvive thi$ and remain my$elf through it all! You are literally the $trongest, $exie$t, most perverted, humble, kind, intelligent, $hady a$ PHUCK human being I know! My $i$tren!!! My hitta!!! I know I tell you thi$ all the time, but Money cud neva buy what you give me!! Our friend$hip will alway$ be family! Ya $weet a$ $ex!!! #MDollaz #April11 #HappyBirthday @mdollas11


The Letter ’S’

It’s a small letter
Not beautiful or exotic; like Z, or X, or Q
But there are still times when it shines

Like right there: shines
Bring light into darkness

Or secret
Things forever hidden
Things that sometimes are good
Things that other times tear you apart
Like a bullet through your chest
That no matter how many times it’s fired
It still hurts the same
And somehow, you aren’t dead

Yeah, that’s the letter ’S’ in my mind

Its a peculiar letter to me
And I’ve grown to, get this, spite that letter

Because the only way I will ever “shine”
Or get rid of my “secrets”
Is to get rid of that damn ’S’

But there’s a problem

If I get rid of the ’S’
I’m left with utter nonsense
What do I do with “hines” and “ecrets”?


Yet I still want that letter gone from my life


Because when you get rid of ’S’


……becomes ‘He’

Yeah, that’s what I’m after

—  Skyelar Jasper, a non-binary trans guy @diagahybr