I'm in high school and it's unbelievably shit and I'm really worried about college and all that and I was just wondering how did things work out for you? Like how were you in high school, how'd you get your first job and make connections and all that?? I would love to be as successful as you when I'm your age but just the thought of the future stresses me out.
This is going to be a long one *deep sigh*
Well first off, let me clarify this because I wouldn’t at all consider myself successful by most standards lol. I’m 22, with some experiences well beyond my years, but on a surface level, I am just like any other broke ass 22 year old trying to figure shit out. I’ve had one well paying corporate job for bout 2 years that ended up not working out — thanks to the company basically selling out — and then after that it was back to square one. So I’ve definitely had my glory moments but over-all, I’ve got a long way to go. So while I’m flattered, I think you should definitely aim higher than trying to be like me because
I’m pretty sure you can do better.
Now to answer your question:
I was so terrible in High School. Growing up, I was always an A student and that was only because it didn’t take much effort for me to succeed in school, — which isn’t a testament to my intelligence especially since most of your primary education is really just following fucking directions. There was some point in my high school career, I think during 10th grade where I just really stopped giving a fuck. I didn’t go to school weeks at a time, I was taking the few classes I felt like caring about online, showing up to school when I felt like it and smoked weed, fucked around all day.
I was really persistant about doing whatever I wanted and at the time I really wanted to design clothing and start my own zine and in my naive opinion school got in the way of that so I just neglected it.
I was fucking lazy and terrible, and frankly, if it wasn’t for the fact that my test scores were high enough that with enough ass-kissing, my teachers and guidance counselors would cut me slack and pass me without any effort I honestly don’t know where I’d be today. I didn’t start thinking about college or my future in general until I graduated. I was looking around and seeing all my friends and classmates going off to college or what have you and I was just like.. “shit now what?“ I was lost, depressed, confused and mad at myself. I felt like I let myself down and lost complete focus and there was no way of going back to fix it.
I felt stuck.
That was when I was 17.
I got my first corporate job at Ecko as an editor when I was 20.
In between those three years from graduating high school to working at Ecko, I had made a serious decision to sort of 180 my life. I stopped smoking weed, dropped all my friends and spend those three years dedicating myself to myself, I decided to make the best of where I was in life. I started writing more, picking up old hobbies, I wanted to reacquaint myself to me. I didn’t feel familiar with myself and wanted to find out who I was and what I wanted out of life. I was taking classes at a state college and decided I wanted to go to major in print journalism and one day become a fashion/music editor. I did some internships, had some small writing jobs but was ultimately bored and underwhelmed by the few choices Orlando had. I hated interning, I was arrogant, so I thought I was better and smarter than most of the editors I worked under (I still think I was lol) so I quit my internships and started a magazine of my own.
That magazine I started and worked my ass off towards for those years is the same magazine that a few years later, Vashtie found and brought to the CEO of Marc Ecko Enterprises.
So obviously my life so far hasn’t exactly been by the books. It’s been pretty unpredictable. The place I am in my life right now would be so unbelievable for me to even consider just a few years ago.
High School is supposed to be shit, and I hate to disregard the last 4 years of your life, but in all honesty, none of it even fucking matters unless you want it to. Your life will be exactly what you make out of it no matter what your current situation is. Find comfort in the fact that you should be worried and stressed about your future, that’s a good thing. It’s a sign that you’re aware, Awareness is something I wish I had when I was in high school so consider yourself better off than me. If I can make all of this out of the very little I had when I was graduating, imagine what you can do!
If I could go back in time and talk to 15 year old Sarah, I’d tell her to find what she loves in life and stick with it, no matter what. Don’t worry about what everyone else is doing or sticking to some well paved academic path, follow your gut and give it your 100%. You know yourself better than anyone else and you know in your heart the greatness you are capable of.
…and if you aren’t scared shitless, you just don’t care enough.