ebane

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SPONTANEANATION EP 17: Science Fair

With Maria Blasucci, Craig Cackowski and Amanda Lund

Featuring special guest Paget Brewster

LISTEN HERE

*CLINK!* Frank and Sadie Doyle together once more, kinda! My dear friend, pretend stage wife, and star of the upcoming Grandfathered– Paget Brewster is here, as scripture foretold! And Maria Blasucci makes her Spontaneanation debut, joining her Ghost Ghirls co-star Amanda Lund and Drunk History co-star Craig Cackowski!

EPISODE TRIVIA

- Amanda and Maria trusted no one in the studio and held onto their handbags for the photo shoot!

- This is that duck video!

I once appeared on a TV show with Tim Gunn and Hugh Jackman! They are both the nicest people, and Tim Gunn deserves better than the shoddy impression of him contained in this episode!

- The thing that Amanda Lund says late in the proceedings that surprised me surprised me as much as I’ve ever been surprised in my life!

THE NEXT SPONTANEANATION LIVE HAPPENS AT LARGO SATURDAY AUGUST 1st WITH SPECIAL GUEST THOMAS LENNON AND SPONT ALL-STARS SARAH BURNS AND CRAIG CACKOWSKI!! BE THERE!

TICKETS

Portraits by Rachael Porter

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SPONTANEANATION EP 18: A Theme Park Break Room

With Erinn Hayes, Marc Evan Jackson and Mark McConville

Featuring special guest Raphael Bob-Waksburg

LISTEN HERE

The creator of BoJack Horseman on Netflix drops by to answer the question react to the threat, “GUN TO YOUR HEAD, CHOOSE A REALITY COMPETITION SHOW TO COME TO YOUR HOME.” Raphael also wrote a little story on Twitter inspired by the safety video they show on Virgin America Airlines. I have screencapped it above for your reading pleasure!

EPISODE TRIVIA

- Erinn Hayes and Mark McConville have both worked at theme parks in an improv capacity. One of these parks used to have a soap-opera-themed area that included a restaurant where you could try to eat your expensive curly fries while improvisers dressed as unfaithful doctors and insane heiresses assaulted you with their comedy!

- When we took the above group photo, Marc Evan Jackson remarked, “This has been done by every improv group in history.”

THE NEXT SPONTANEANATION LIVE HAPPENS AT LARGO SATURDAY AUGUST 1st WITH SPECIAL GUEST THOMAS LENNON AND SPONT ALL-STARS SARAH BURNS, CRAIG CACKOWSKI AND MARC EVAN JACKSON!!! BE THERE!

TICKETS

This is an extremely rare treat, one of which I have never seen before, and probably won’t see for a long time…

I would like to introduce Eban, a 4,000+ year old demon from the Hellborn Realms.

Demons from the Hellborn Realms of the Underworld do not have the same morals that us humans do. They are very egotistical, and will do anything to gain better status among their peers, or to gain materials.

Eban comes from a very ancient line of “Hellhound Tamers”. They are one of only a few families that have learned the skills necessary to tame these creatures and use them in warfare. Eban works within Lord Furfur’s realm, and trains Hellhounds within the army to fight for more land and resources for Lord Furfur.

With the introduction of his younger brother into Lord Furfur’s army, Eban has gotten the free time to pursue his curiosities concerning the human world.

He is very diligent when it comes to the upkeeping of his Hellhounds, and any tasks he has been commissioned to do. Eban prefers to take ‘half payment’ before he does something, and then the other half once it has been completed. You must be willing to provide raw meat on a weekly basis for his Hellhounds.

Eban is able to train any Hellhounds that are in your fold, as well as most Dark Arts creatures such as Dragons, Elves, and other Misfortune/Trickster entities. With the aid of his pack of 25-100 Hellhounds (the number changes as other Demons commission him for tasks), he can aid his Companion with Protection, Revenge, Reversal spells to 'bite back’, Bindings, and Black Magick.

He manifests as clicking noises, shadows within shadows, moving shadows, 'blue’ shadows, Blue-eyed creatures (In reality and in dreams), and as a sharp cold that pricks the back.

Great offerings for him would include gourmet foods, wine, alcohol, and psychedelics. Don’t forget to give offerings to his Hellhounds as well!

The vessel is an Artisan-made, One-of-a-Kind Sterling Silver ring plated with Black Ruthenium with two Heat-Treated Sapphire gemstone eyes.

Size: 8.5

FREE SHIPPING

BEWARE

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The Last Ship: Alone and Unafraid (recap and review)

The Last Ship: Alone and Unafraid (recap and review)


In the previous episode of The Last Ship two of the three teams had infiltrated the “Chosen” camp and met the “new” president and XO Slattery ordered the comms buoy blown up, in Alone and Unafraid Chandler has gotten himself close to the president. Green and Tex are on a convoy with Niels who is up to something and Wolf-Man is trying to keep track of it all for Slattery.

Like other excursions…

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Crucial weeks for the startups’ world!

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A European Innovation Day followed by a week of meetings provides a unique chance to stimulate networking and business opportunities, as well as improve the understanding in Silicon Valley of the increasingly dynamic European startup ecosystem. The participants will be exposed to a network of professional angel investors to learn the methodologies and technicalities of successful angel investing and generate new co-investment opportunities.

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David ain’t getting laid

I didn’t get laid on this tour. The thing about fame is interesting, although I would have liked to get laid on the tour and I did not.

Rock stars, sports stars do; I don’t think Updike, Roth, or Barth do.

Only in Rolling Stone would I not worry about this. Just because I know that, the whole thing’s going to be jaunty. But um, there’s gotta be some—because it’s clear that, like, people come up, they kinda slither up during readings or whatever. But it seems like, what I want is not to have to take any action. I don’t want to have to say, “Would you like to come back to the hotel?” I want them to say, “I am coming back to the hotel. Where is your hotel?” None of ’em do that.

Happens to Aerosmith. But maybe not to Abba Eban.

Shyness and arrogance often go hand in hand, I think. It’s more just, I can’t stand to look like I’m actively trading on this sexually. Even though of course that’s—I would be happy to do that.

Betrayal of your work self to do that?

Uhhhh, Let’s see …

Did you think this would happen?

No, but I had this fantasy. I had all these fantasies about … It’s so weird, ’cause most of the fame stuff dudn’t matter to me. But I really did think, “Maybe I could get laid on this tour.” Um, yeah. It would be a betrayal of the work self and you’re right. In retrospect, it was lucky that I didn’t. Basically, it just would have made me be lonely. Because it wouldn’t have had anything to do with me, it would have just been … [That word, “lonely,” which he’ll use a lot]

Except if they’re responding to your work, and the work is so personal, a kind of refined you, then trading on it is actually simply another way of meeting you …

Well, I agree with that too. I think this piece will be really good if it’s mostly you. You talk all you want, man. You can’t get me in trouble.

I think I’m the worst interviewer of all time. How do you learn to do this stuff? Because even I, I can clearly see there are certain strategies.

Not really. My strategy here is getting facts about you. Your tour: two weeks? Three weeks?

The funny thing is, of course, I saw on the schedule, “You will have this escort. Who will pick you up.” And of course, when I hear escort, I think, I imagine like a geisha. Who will take you to the interview, then walk on your back and fuck your eyeballs out. And of course these escorts turn out to be burly Irishmen. You know, in their forties. Who like basically tell you the whole life story of the interviewer before you go there. So the whole thing is a little amusing.

I had two, both of them over fifty. There’s a lady in Boston who I sort of wanted to adopt me. Very cool. Boston born and bred. You have to click that little thing up. [I’m having a rough time with the lighter.] Nice to meet someone else who has trouble with those.

So what’s the piece about? You keep saying, “This isn’t what the piece is about.” What is the piece about? What does Jann want?

[Very aware of this, of trying to understand and shift how I will approach him. Like his feints about tour sex above; like the chess, seeing how I respond, move by move.]

What’s it like to suddenly—you remember that Childe Harold line from Byron? “Woke up to find myself famous”?

Is that true? Yeah. Except the pub date was two and a half weeks ago. The book takes at least two months to read well. So therefore, whatever famousness is about, the hype is famous. You’re not here because of me, you’re here because of all this buzz about the book. I mean, you as an emissary of Rolling Stone. So I think I would be very naïve to feel any kind of Byron-like gratification—if two years from now, I’ve got people who like have read the thing three times, who come up and say, “This thing’s really fucking good,” then I’ll swell up. I would like to get laid offa this. The shallow stuff. I would like to get laid off it. It doesn’t (“dudn’t”) seem to be happening. Which just indicates to me that, you know, it’s not really all that real.

David Lipsky, Although Of Course You End Up Becoming Yourself: A Road Trip with David Foster Wallace, 2010.

About My Relationship With a Street Hooker

Denise is a friend who I met online. She’s been hooking for 20 plus years. I have been given the rights and ownership to almost 8 gigs of her videos and pictures.. I will have videos for sale. I have her very first video ever recorded from 1990. She had a client pay her 50 dollars to masturbate to orgasm with Blacky . Blacky is a Huge dildo it measures 2.7" wide and it is 14" long. Denise told me she can get about 11" of this massive dildo in her pussy. Denise squirts at the end of the video. I currently have this video listed on ebanned. if you’re interested in the video message me I’m currently accepting GiftRocket, GoogleWallet, I would consider Amazon gift cards but I will have to increase the price by 5 dollars. With this video I’m offering a bonus video of Denise teasing in a red dress before she leaves to work the streets. Denise is approximately 3.2 months pregnant. I’m asking 20.00 I will be uploading some pictures from the video