dwight facts

  • JIM: I'm just saying that you can't be sure that it wasn't you.
  • DWIGHT: That's ridiculous. Of course it wasn't me.
  • JIM: Marijuana is a memory loss drug, so maybe you just don't remember.
  • DWIGHT: I would remember.
  • JIM: Well, how could you if it just erased your memory?
  • DWIGHT: That's not how it works.
  • JIM: Now, how do you know how it works?
  • DWIGHT: Knock it off, okay? I'm interviewing you.
  • JIM: No! You said I'd be conducting the interview when I walked in here. Now, exactly how much pot did you smoke?

We have to stop being cute. Everyone’s vagina smells like meat or fish or tampon residue and we need to stop lying about that shit. No real human woman has a pussy that smells like the produce section at Wholefoods. Vaginas are moist, damp, covered in hair, kept in the dark, and packed to overflowing with bacterial flora and fauna. And it also happens to be spitting distance from our butthole where diarrhea comes from. That shit is not supposed to smell like a spring day. Can I clean it up? YES. Will I still smell like a sexually-aroused human female? ALSO, YES. Pussy stinks. Deal with that shit.

- Samantha Irby, Bitches Gotta Eat

i’m really gay and this is really gay ???????????? also i drew in my real style for once holy heck

i ruined it tho:

gay ?./??,¿

Dwight & Sherry and Daryl & Carol

A topic that’s being discussed on TSDF and which I wanted to gather all the “evidence” together and put it in once place here. 

So, since the spoilers for Always Accountable came out I have been saying that it was significant that Daryl would be the one to tangle with Dwight & Sherry - specifically the fact he meets them as a couple (rather than just Dwight alone).  

In that episode we are shown them as a couple, they dynamic and that while Dwight seems bad he’s essentially a “good” man who has never killed and just wants to help his wife (and her sister).

I believe from this point Gimple wanted to parallel Daryl & Carol’s relationship with Dwight & Sherry’s.

  • Starting with Always Accountable, we have the whole episode taking place in the “burnt forest” (Carol’s exact description in Twice as Far). We know - and the commentary for Same Boat specifically mentions - that fire is Carol’s symbol. She’s associated with it, and particularly in relation to her relationship with Daryl (see all of Consumed). We have Daryl’s statement “we ain’t ashes” - and here he is with a couple in a place that is all ashes.
  • And this is the episode and the location where Gimple himself insisted a Cherokee Rose make an appearance - in the burnt forest with Dwight & Sherry, a symbol of Daryl’s relationship with Carol.
  • In Twice as Far, both of Daryl and Carol’s scenes are about Dwight, about Daryl not killing Dwight.
  • Dwight has taken Daryl’s vest and bike and crossbow and has become some twisted version of Daryl, as Negan’s right-hand man (where Daryl is RIck’s)

In season 7, we see the situation Dwight & Sherry are now in - Sherry has given herself to Negan as a wife, in order to save Dwight’s life. Both are miserable, but feel it’s better to live like this, apart, than lose each other completely. 

  • In the stairwell scene in Twice as Far, we see Carol and Daryl sharing a smoke. Carol has the cigarettes, Daryl asks for one, lights it and they have a brief uncomfortable talk about the way things are.
  • In The Cell, we see Dwight and Sherry share a smoke on some stairs. Again, the woman has the cigarettes, he asks for one and lights it then they have an uncomfortable talk about the way things are.

Also in seasons 7, we know The Well and The Cell are “twinned” episodes, showing us where Carol and Daryl are. 

In The Well, Gimple uses Don’t Think Twice (it’s Alright) as a song in the ep, with lyrics that give us insight into why Carol has left the ASZ (and wants to leave the Kingdom too), and a large part of that reason is Daryl - foreshadowing her saying “I couldn’t lose you” to Daryl in New Best Friends.


Well it ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe
Ifin’ you don’t know by now
An’ it ain’t no use to sit and wonder why, babe
It’ll never do some how
When your rooster crows at the break a dawn
Look out your window and I’ll be gone
You’re the reason I’m trav'lin’ on
Don’t think twice, it’s all right

And it ain’t no use in a-turnin’ on your light, babe
The light I never knowed
An’ it ain’t no use in turnin’ on your light, babe
I’m on the dark side of the road
But I wish there was somethin’ you would do or say
To try and make me change my mind and stay
We never did too much talkin’ anyway
But don’t think twice, it’s all rightNo it ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal
Like you never done before
And it ain’t no use in callin’ out my name, gal
I can't…

Then we have The Cell, where the piece of music used JUST after Dwight compares himself to Daryl (specifically bringing him back to the vents in the “burnt forest”) we hear Crying by Roy Orbison:


I was all right for a while, I could smile for a while
But I saw you last night, you held my hand so tight
As you stopped to say “Hello”
Aw you wished me well, you couldn’t tell

That I’d been crying over you, crying over you

Then you said “so long”. left me standing all alone
Alone and crying, crying, crying crying
It’s hard to understand but the touch of your hand
Can start me cryingI thought that I was over you but it’s true, so true
I love you even more than I did before but darling what can I do
For you don’t love me and I’ll always be

Crying over you, crying over you
Yes, now you’re gone and from this moment on
I’ll be crying, crying, crying, crying
Yeah crying, crying, over you

Now, those lyrics at the time are clearly meant to make us think about Dwight and Sherry, but it’s also clear now we know the events of New best Friends that these lyrics describe EXACTLY the Daryl and Carol portion of the episode. 

So once again the music is about Carol and Daryl, their relationship and foreshadowing future events, but more than that it strongly emphasises this parallel with Dwight and Sherry.

Here we have two couples, where the woman has put herself someplace “away” from the guy because she doesn’t want to lose him- explicitly said on the show. The guy is crying because he’s trying to put on a brave face, but seeing her and not being with her breaks his heart. So instead he goes out there and does what he can to win the war so she can be free.

thenkas to @zedwordjen @justyouanmee adn @ravenesque2 whose posts contributed largely to this!

3

30 Day Negan Challenge

Day 23: Favorite moment with Dwight

1: Yeah, c’mon, Dwight, nothing weird about pissing on your enemies body…

2. The fact that Dwight probably tells Negan ‘they’re called bolts’ constantly.

3 Dwight is keeping Negan’s lady away from him… ahhh sweet revenge…

I Can’t Wait to Hear You Scream PT. 10

Summary: You wake up in the infirmary

Warning: Still lots of fucking cursing and Negan’s violence (But for a good reason).

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

“A bad boy can be very good for a girl.” - Melissa de la Cruz

-

You could hear distant voices, none of which you could place as to who they were. you could see a light off in the distance through the darkness as the light got brighter and brighter, a room was coming into focus.
You were beginning to open your eyes.
You weren’t dead.
As your eyes adjusted, you could see that you were no longer in the basement, you glanced around slowly to see you were in the infirmary.
You could feel the pain in your face.
You put your hand up to it slowly to feel your now swollen eye, and you felt a painful tugging at your side, you looked down and lifted up the blanket that was laying on you and the bloody shirt you were still in to see a bandage wrapped around your ribs.
You remembered now that you had been stabbed.
You ran your hand along the bandage and could feel the stitches poking through it.

“It’s best if you don’t pick at the stitches.” A smooth voice came from in front of you.
You looked up to see a man in a lab coat entering into the room, he was the doctor at the sanctuary. You put the cover back over you.
“How long was I out?” You asked him in a raspy tone.

The doctor was writing something down on a clipboard that was in his hand and he glanced up at you, “You were sedated for about 2 days. I had to work to get your bleeding to stop, that was a pretty nasty wound.” He said, pointing to your bandaged side.

“So, I almost died?” You said, looking at the bandage.

“To be blunt, yes. I was able to get your stab wound under control just in time.” He said, looking at you in a serious manner.

“Who found me?” You asked curiously.

“Dwight did. In fact-” the doctor went to the door and leaned outside of it motioning for someone to come in. After a few seconds Dwight entered the room and came up to you.

“Finally came back to the land of the living I see.” He said with a straight face, you couldn’t tell if he was happy to see you alive or not, but Dwight never really show much emotion from what you had gathered about him.

You nodded back, “Have you been outside the whole time?”

“Yeah, I’ve been on guard duty. Negan says absolutely no one is allowed in here except him and the doc. I’m only in here now to make sure you’re awake, I’m supposed notify him time you woke up.” He shifted his weight onto one foot. You could tell he had spent the majority of the time outside your door standing up and that he was exhausted.

“Has Negan even come by?” You expected the answer was no, but you asked anyway.

“Yeah, he’s been by a lot. When he wasn’t out with the men he was here seeing how you were. Trust me, he’s fucking livid right now and he wants to know who did it.” He said looking around then back to you.

You were thoroughly surprised by the answer of Negan coming by here. You cracked a smile to yourself at the though of him checking up on you in your time of need.

Dwight started to head for the door, “Look, I have to go get Negan. You can tell him what you know when he gets here.”

“Wait-” You said suddenly, making Dwight turn back around to look at you, “Thank you, Dwight.”

“Don’t mention it.” He said and turned, walking out of the room.


It took all of 10 minutes before Negan came in, with his trademark leather jacket on, and of course Lucille in either hand. His facial expression was half relieved and half hostility.
“Jesus fuckin’ Christ, she lives.” He said, pulling a chair up beside the gurney you were laying on and taking a seat in the chair backwards.
You looked back at him, no words were spoken between you to for a few minutes, he had a serious look on his face and something you never seen on his face before; it was worry.
You were happy to see him and even if he didn’t admit it, you could tell he was happy to see you alive.

“You fuckin’ scared the shit out of me, darlin’.” He said in a serious tone, resting Lucille on the back of the chair he was sitting in.

You looked over to him, his dark eyes looking back into yours, “Trust me, I didn’t mean to get myself almost killed.”

He chuckled, “No shit. You took quite a fuckin’ hit. You’re one tough little girl, I’ll give you that.”

You gave a weak smile at him being caring for once, “Well, it’d be nice to hear you say something like that when I don’t look like shit.”

Negan pursed his lips and gave you a sly smile, “Nah, it’s not so damn bad. I’d still fuck you, baby doll.” He winked. No matter what, he always had time for a sexual comment.
You rolled your eyes playfully and shook your head at him.
He bit his lip in his usual sexy way, and his face went serious as he ran a gloved hand through his beard.

“But, back to the damn matter at hand - who the fuck did it? Because there was no one fuckin’ still around when Dwight came in.” He had an intense look on his face as his anger started to wash over him again and he gripped Lucille’s handle tightly.

You let out a breath, “It was two people, but you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

He shook his head, “Fuckin’ try me, darlin’, they’re not getting away with this shit.” Anger was rising in his tone of voice.
It honestly made you feel good to see him being protective of you, you had seen it before when you had went on a run together, but it was different with you being actually hurt this time.

You blinked and sat up in the bed, looking at him and moving hair out of your face, “ It was Randy and… Amber, Negan.”

Negan gritted his teeth as his eyes narrowed, still looking at you, “Randy and Amber?” He growled.
You nodded back to him.

He sucked his teeth hard, leaning back and brushing his hand roughly through his hair, you could literally feel his anger as he got up, still gripping Lucille.

“Dwight!” He called loudly. Dwight entered back into the room slowly.

“Yeah, boss?” Dwight said cautiously, eyeing Lucille in Negan’s grip.

“You and Simon go out and fuckin’ find Randy right goddamn now. When you do find that little prick, you throw his ass in a motherfuckin’ cell downstairs until I get the chance to fuckin’ take care of him.” Negan growled, pointing outside.
Dwight nodded and quickly made his way back out.
Negan just stood there for a minute, you could hear him breathing heavily as he tried to get his anger under control.
He finally sat back down, still gritting his teeth,

“I’m fuckin’ sorry about this. Had I known Amber would fuckin’ pull some shit of this kinda goddamn level, I wouldn’t have stopped you from beating her fuckin’ ass that day.” He said, slamming his fist on the chair.

“It’s fine.” You spoke back slowly.

“Not to me, darlin’.” He said sternly, giving you a serious look before getting up again.

He slang the chair to the other side of the room and headed for the door. You laid there and watched him go, you wanted to go after him, but knew that you just needed to let him cool off.


After about an hour Negan came back into the room and sat on the edge of the bed. “Randy has fled the fuckin’ sanctuary. The men have checked all the rooms and the outside. But it’s not over.. Fuck that, it’s not even remotely close to over. We’re gonna find him.”

“What about Amber?” You asked, biting at your lip.

Negan let out an angered breathe, “She’s still fuckin’ here, darlin’. She’s upstairs with the wives, she’s acting like every goddamn thing is just fuckin’ peachy. But she’s gonna have her fuckin’ moment, I can promise you that.”

“What’s gonna happen?” You asked.

“You’re gonna fuckin’ be there when it happens, darlin’, that’s the only reason her ass isn’t strung up on the barrier workin’ for me as a walker.” He cracked his knuckles and ran a hand through his hair.

“There’s something else you should know.” You said, remembering what Amber had told you.

“And what is that?” He spoke, eyeing you with his dark eyes, still full of anger.

You sat up in the bed again, throwing the blanket off of you, revealing your bloody clothes.

Negan noticed and made a pained face, “Jesus fuckin’ Christ.”

“Looks worse than it is.”

“Need to get you some fuckin’ clothes, but what do you have to tell me?” He said standing up and waiting for you to speak.

“It’s Amber. When they had me in the basement.. She said she’s been going with Randy behind your back and that they were planning to overtake you.” You said cautiously, scared of what Negan would do now that you had told him this.
He looked at you for a moment and his eyes narrowed, he chewed on his lip and smirked in the way he usually did before he snapped.

“Can you walk?” He said firmly, but in a calm tone.

You nodded, “Yeah, I feel fine.”

“Good.” He grabbed your arm and helped you off the bed and pulled you out of the room with him.
Dwight was sitting outside of the room again.

“Dwight, gather every-fuckin-body outside. Now.” Negan said, still pulling you along beside him.

“What about the clothes?” You asked.

“Trust me, babydoll. You’re gonna wanna fuckin’ keep those bloody fuckers on for now.” He growled, leading you upstairs to the wives room.

When you arrived upstairs, he entered the room and you were walking behind him slowly, he still had Lucille in a tight grasp and you were sure to distance yourself from her.
You saw Amber immediately run up to Negan, grabbing onto his chest, “Hi, Daddy.. You seem tense.” She said, giving him a pouting face. A sick feeling washed over you.

You heard Negan laugh, “I am rather Fuckin’ tense, darlin’.”
And at that, he turned around, motioning you over.
You walked over towards him and Amber’s eyes widened as she saw you, but she didn’t say anything. She looked as if she was seeing a ghost walk through the door.

“Ladies-” Negan began, “(Y/N) was involved in something terrible a couple of days ago.”
The other wives all looked at you and saw the bloody clothes you were wearing, none of them seemed to understand what was going on.
Amber’s eyes never left you, you could see the fear in her eyes, but she did her best to play it off.

“Oh, what happened to you?” She said in her best apologetic tone.

“Well, (Y/N) was fuckin’ attacked-” Negan said as he smiled, looking around the room, “And well, I’m feeling pretty fuckin’ pissed right now.” He growled.
He turned back to Amber and placed a gloved hand on her face, “Amber, honey..” He trailed off.
Amber smiled at him, showing her teeth.
Negan smiled back and slid his hand to her throat tightening his grip, throwing her to the ground.
The other wives all gasped simultaneously. Negan had never been violent with any of the wives before and they were shocked. Amber began coughing as she struggled under his grip.

Negan tightened his grasp on her neck, “Where the fuck do I even fuckin’ start with you? I know everything sweetheart. I am fucking everywhere.” He growled, yanking her up, she had her hands around his arm trying to pull him off.

“I- dadd- I’m sorry.” She choked out.

“Sorry? Sorry?! It’s too late for that. But you fuckin’ will be, I can goddamn guarantee that, sweetheart.” He growled, dragging her to the door before turning back to the other wives, “If anyone of you,” he said, pointing at them with Lucille, “ever try any shit, let this be a fuckin’ lesson as to what you’ll be fuckin’ in for next. All of you get your goddamn asses outside. Now. It’s time for a little fuckin’ attitude adjustment around here.” He said dragging Amber out of the room.
You followed behind him watching Amber struggle as he kept tightening his grip on her.
You couldn’t help but smile watching Negan standing up for you and making her pay, after everything that had gone on you didn’t feel sorry for her, and you knew that you wouldnt feel remorse for what happened to her next.

You arrived outside with him and the rest of the sanctuary, everyone looked around worried, not knowing what was going on. Everyone was shocked to see Negan walking out of the building with his hand on the throat of one of his wives, dragging her out before throwing her to the ground in the middle of the crowd.
She sat in the dirt, unmoving, to afraid to do anything.

“Now, you’re all probably wondering why the fuck I called you out here and why the fuck one of my wives is currently in the dirt on her ass.” He spoke loudly, pacing around Amber, swinging Lucille in one of his hands.
“You see, when you fuckin’ come here, do I not make it clear that there are goddamn rules?” He asked, holding his arms out looking to the crowd. There were a series of nods from everyone, who still looked worried.
“Good!-” Negan praised, “I hope you fuckin’ know, because guess what? Amber sure fuckin’ didn’t and that why she’s in her current goddamn predicament.” He grabbed Amber by her hair yanking her head back,
“You see, Amber decided to fuck around with a worker behind my back. She was also very jealous of my extremely hot new wife, (Y/N)-” He shouted, pointing to you. Everyone in the crowd glanced over at you, then back to Negan.
“Amber was so jealous of her that she and Randy - the guy she was fuckin’ with behind my back - decided to attack (Y/N), and that’s not fuckin’ cool. I can’t even begin to tell you how uncool that motherfucking shit is.. So, on that note; I guess it’s fuckin’ time for some damn public punishment.” He said and gave Amber a hard punch to the face, she cried out and held her eye where his fist made contact.
You could see the anger rising in Negan’s voice at every word he spoke.
Never had you seen him this mad and it was scary, he had scared you before because you knew how ruthless he could be, but it was always scary none-the-less.

“I guess I should also fuckin’ mention that her and that goddamn prick were planning to fuckin’ take over the sanctuary.” He growled and threw Amber back down to the ground.
He leaned back up, swinging Lucille over his shoulder, “If anyone else her has it in their mind that they’re gonna fuckin’ takeover, you might as well come on over here and get on your fuckin’ knees, because that where you’re gonna end up. I. Am. Everywhere. And sooner or later I will fucking find out. I find it very goddamn disrespectful and so does Lucille-” he patted the bat with a free hand, “And I gotta admit, Lucille is feeling pretty goddamn thirsty right at this moment .” He said, smiling wickedly at everyone.

He stood in front of Amber, she was crying and he lowered Lucille to her level of vision. “No time for fuckin’ tears now, sweetheart. There are no fuckin’ exceptions. So take a good goddamn look at the last thing that’s ever gonna go through your fuckin’ head.”

“Please.. Please, Negan.” She cried hysterically, grasping out to his legs.

Negan snorted with laughter and kicked her hands away, “Get up on your fucking knees.” He rolled his eyes with a smile.

She cried even more, but adjusted position and got to her knees.
Negan raised Lucille above his head, there were gasps and horrified looks from the crowd.
He suddenly stopped and lowered Lucille, and looked over to you and then looked around to the crowd, he had a grin on his face and leaned backed,
“Wait. Wait. Wait-” he laughed, “I just got the greatest goddamn-fuckin’ idea.” He smiled again, biting his lip.

“(Y/N).” He spoke, motioning for you to come back over to him.
You walked over to him slowly and stood beside him, you could see Amber looking up at both of you pleadingly and you looked at him wondering what was going on.

He looked around, “Since some of you think it’s cool to fuck with my really hot wife; let this be a lesson as to why not to fuck with her again.” He spoke loudly to the crowd so they could hear him over Amber’s sobs.
He looked back to you with a smile and stretched his arm out, and your eyes widened in shock as you saw that he was handing Lucille over to you.

Don’t Be A Cog...

Originally posted by insxneofrp

Sorry if this is a bit long guys but I really hope you enjoy it and I hope you don’t like Dwight too much…just saying haha!


Sometimes life doesn’t go according to plan…especially in Gotham.

Here I am…just left school and starting on my way on a career path…well that is until I got fired.

Typical office job…9 til 5 and 5 days a week.

It was okay…a little boring but okay.

If it wasn’t for the supervisor…she wasn’t a manager but just a supervisor who acted like a manager. She was probably the reason the term ‘Micro-managing’ was created.

I really needed this job and she knew that but still just through me out like trash.

I know they say you can’t find happiness at the bottom of a bottle but I wasn’t sure what else to do…I didn’t want to go home just yet and confront my parents.

So I made my way to a new club that opened not too far away. After flashing my ID to the guy standing at the door, I made my way in and weaved through the crowd, taking a seat at the bar.

I ordered the strongest drink they had and was shortly served. While sipping my drink I looked around and noticed everyone in the club was dressed in the same sort of clothes. The shirts appeared to be straitjackets and a lot of people were wearing messy clown makeup.

Keep reading

Princess, Pt. 1

Requested by anonymous: Could you do an imagine where you’re Merle’s daughter (he’s still dead) and Negan takes a romantic/recruiting interest in you, and Daryl and Rick are scared for you cause they feel they won’t be able to protect you?

Spoilers: Season 6 Finale.

Warning: This fic… got dark. It just got kinda dark kinda fast. So, it may be triggering, but I’m not even sure what kind of trigger warning to put on it, so just be aware.

Princess, pt. 1

“Careful!” Rosita hissed, pulling the arrow that had just whizzed past her out of the bark of the tree it had stuck fast into.

“Ya shouldnta come.” Daryl snatched the arrow out of her hands and jammed a finger into your face. “Especially you. Go back, Y/N. All of you.” He started to walk away.

“What do you even think you’re doing out here?” Glenn and the rest of your small party followed.

“He killed her, man.” Daryl didn’t stop moving.

“We’ll square it.” Michonne said, and Daryl stopped walking. “I will. I promise.” There was silence. “Just come back. We’ll talk about it from home. Our home.”

“Michonne is right. Whatever you’re doing out here isn’t safe.” Glenn said, “Just come home.” He reached out to try to pull Daryl’s arm, but as soon as he touched the other man, Daryl yanked himself out of reach and started walking again.

“I can’t. I just can’t.” Daryl was walking faster now.

“HEY!” You yell out, running up and shoving Daryl in the back as hard as you dared.

He turned around to face you. “Go. Home. Y/N!” He snarled in your face.

You shove him again. “I lost my dad in a renegade revenge mission. Did you forget that?” You got up into his face. You were definitely a Dixon; when your namesake fought, they fought hard. “Now are you telling me I’m gonna lose my uncle the same way?” It was quiet in the forest. “HUH?” You practically scream in his face.

There was whistling echoing all around you in the trees, and suddenly all arguments were forgotten. Men—no, Saviors—were stepping out from behind trees, guns trained on you. How they managed to get so close without anyone noticing, you weren’t sure.

The whistling had stopped, but the clicks of gun safeties switching off and chambers being loaded took their place in the still air. For a moment, no one moved. Then, Rosita slowly raised her hands in surrender, and you, Glenn, and Michonne followed suit. Daryl was the only one who hadn’t dropped his weapon yet.

A lanky, blond haired man with a scar on the side of his face stepped out from a tree directly behind your uncle. “Hi Daryl.” He said, and as Daryl turned to face him, his gun went off.

There was blood in your eyes and you screamed in shock before someone hit you over the head and you blacked out.

——

“HEY!” You banged on the back door of the van they were keeping you in one more time. “If you don’t give us some water or something, you’re going to have 5 dead prisoners before you can even do whatever you’re planning.” You bang on the van door again.

Daryl was still breathing, but only barely as he lay feverish and shivering in your lap. You’d managed to stop the bleeding, but if he didn’t get medical attention soon, he would die. He’d already thrown up twice from pain and shock, and the whole back of the van smelled of vomit, blood, sweat, and terror. It was miserable.

And all you were asking for was a glass of fucking water.

“HELLO??” You yell, banging again. “I know you assholes can hear me!”

The van door flew open, and the minimal sunlight that was left in the day streamed in to blind you. “Will you shut up, you little bitch?” The man that shot Daryl snarled in through the open door. “Pipe down, or I’ll put a matching bullet hole in you.” He waved his gun absently in your face.

“Now, Dwight, that’s no way to talk to our guests.” A smooth, unfamiliar voice chided from somewhere out of your line of sight. “Why don’t you get them some water?” Dwight grumbled a little, but went to comply. A new face with a salt and pepper beard and slicked-back hair appeared in the doorway now. The man was wearing a tight leather jacket and was smiling at you in a way that made you angry. “Hi. I’m Negan.” You didn’t say anything, you just clutched your uncle’s sweaty face closer to you. “I like you. You’ve got a lot of spunk in you for just a little girl.”

You narrow your eyes at him. You were twenty, dammit. “I’m twenty, ass-hat.”

“You got a name, twenty?”

You say nothing, and the silence stretches on for minutes. So long in fact, that Dwight returns with the water before Negan speaks again, “You can either tell me your name, or I can drag it out of you on your dying breath.”

You glare at him before saying evenly, “Y/N.”

“I like that.”

Negan smiles again. It was creepy. Like a politician you may have voted for pre-apocalypse with no real reason other than the fact that everything he said sounded like it was good. Charismatic. Your brain reminded you. The word is charismatic.

You didn’t like it.

“Y/N.” He tries your name out. “I like that, and I like you.” He steps back from the door. “Out of the van, Y/N.”

You don’t move. Daryl’s hand tightens around your arm. Negan doesn’t ask again, instead he grabs you by the ponytail and physically drags you out of the van and you land on the forest floor with a bruising thump. “No!” Daryl croaked out weakly and tried to lunge after you.

Negan knocked him back into the van by pushing on his injured shoulder, and Daryl collapsed once more in a groaning heap onto the floor. “Down boy.” He turned to you. “Your guard dog sure is quick. Too bad we may have to put him down.” He slammed the door of the van closed. “On your feet.” You stood and let him push and lead you in the direction of a campfire, which he shooed everyone else away from. “Sit.” You sat.

You took a water bottle from him and allowed him to press a wrapped sandwich of some sorts into your hands. “I will kill you.” You threaten in a whisper.

Negan laughed. “No you won’t. Because I’m not going to try to kill you. Like I said before, I like you.”

“That’s nice.” You shoot him what Daryl called your ‘Merle glare’ and say, “Cause I fucking hate you.”

Negan sighed. He sighed this long, bored sigh, as if you had started explaining organic chemistry in response to his question about what was for dinner. It only pissed you off more. “Lighten up. I’m not going to hurt you. I want you to work for me.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Well, everyone in your little community is going to work for me, but I want you specifically to work as a liaison between our people.” Negan pronounced ‘liaison’ like ‘lie-ay-zon’ and it pissed you off. “You’re going to make sure the leader over there at that little gated shithole keeps his end of the bargains, and you will report any positives or negatives back to me.”

“What’s in it for me?” You put the sandwich down next to you, but open the bottle of water and take a drink. “Because that just sounds like a shit deal on my part.”

“You,” Negan smiled widely, “Get to be my girlfriend. And I also don’t murder you if shit goes south with your group. I spare you if, and most likely when, they all fuck up.”

You made a face, which you hoped looked like a mixture of horror and disgust, because that was exactly how you felt. “No deal.” You put the water down and stand in the falling darkness to go back to the van. “I don’t want to be involved with you. As a girlfriend or an employee.”

“See, you don’t have a choice in working for me. That I will force you to do. As for the sex, I’m not going to force you,” Negan said, “But I think you will eventually come around to the idea.”

You balled up your fists in anger and tried not to shout. “I will n—“

“Sir!” Dwight came over and pointed to a spot on the other side of the clearing where the RV from Alexandria was pulling up and being parked between two trees. “They got the RV and the one guy inside.” As he spoke, two burly men were dragging a bloody and terrified Eugene out of the vehicle. “The rest will be here soon.”

“Then get to it. You know what to do.” Negan said, and Saviors grabbed weapons and disappeared into the woods.

“Showtime, Princess.” Negan grabbed you by the arm, then used his knife to make a long, ragged gash down the front of your shirt, tearing it in two.

“What the—!” You shoved him hard, and received a slap to the face. The button on his jacket cuff caught your cheek and you could feel a little blood trickling down the side of your face. But you stood your ground.

“Never touch me like that again.” Negan said coldly as he grabbed you again and lead you into the RV. You were told to sit on the couch, then the door shut and you were shrouded in darkness.

——

There were muffled voices outside the RV. Occasional shouting. Negan hadn’t spoken to you since he’d shut the door, and that had been probably close to a half an hour ago. “What will you do to them?” You whisper.

“Collect on their debt.”

You were about to ask what that meant when you heard someone outside of the door to the RV say, “Let’s meet the man of the hour” and bang on the door.

“Stay here until I tell you to.” Negan flung open the door and jumped out into the light of headlamps. “We pissing our pants yet?”

You couldn’t hear what was being said, but you could see your family lined up execution style on the ground. Daryl was paler than earlier and looked as if he could pass out at any moment. Maggie looked the same. Rick had terror in his eyes, and Michonne was staring at you through the darkness. There was no way she could see you, but you knew she knew you were there. Negan pointed his bat at Maggie, said something, and Glenn lunged forward, only to be beaten back into place again.

There was more talk you couldn’t quite hear, then Negan moved back closer to the RV and said, “Princess, you might wanna join us now. I don’t think you’ll want to miss this.”

You figured that was your cue. Shaking, tears streaming down your face, and your eyes downcast, you stepped down into the light of the ring of terror. You stood, frozen and terrified, in front of your family. Upon seeing your shirt in shambles and the large cut across your cheek, Daryl and Rick both started shouting.

Rick suddenly had Negan’s horrific baseball bat shoved in his face. “I told you not to do that shit again.” Negan punched him square in the nose. “You,” He pointed at Daryl. “You’re not worth much soaking wet right now, are you? Jesus, you look like shit.” He kicked Daryl in the chest and he fell to the ground with a wheezing cry.

“Stop it!” You cried out.

Negan turned to face you. “On your knees, Princess. You’re not to talk right now. Let your man do all the talking.” You open your mouth to protest and remind him that he is NOT your man, but the casually swinging Bat of Death convinced you to close it and slowly drop to your knees. “You may answer this one question, though, sweetie.” Negan squatted next to you, surveying the group. “Which one should I kill? I mean, someone’s gotta die, right? To pay for all the deaths your people have inflicted on my people.” Negan looked pointedly at you. “No? If you’re going to be a Savior, you’ll have to make these tough decisions.”

“Then kill me.” You stare him down and out of the corner of your eye you see Rick and Daryl shift again. “Because I will not be a Savior.”

Negan gave that same bored sigh again, and stood back up. “Except you already are. So killing you would defeat the purpose.” He turned to face Rick again. “See, that’s part of the life debt that you owe me. I’m going to kill one of you, and take another for my group. I’ve already chosen my live person,” He pointed the bat at you again, “And now I’ll chose my dead person. Oh! I have an idea.” He walked over to where Glenn was kneeling and pointed the bat in his face. “Eeny.” He moved to Daryl. “Meeney.” Michonne. “Miney.” Rick. “Moe.”

This went on for what felt like eternity. After several agonizing minutes of listening to the child’s nursery rhyme, Negan stuck the bat in Abraham’s face and said, “It.” The ex-military man was glaring at Negan now. “Anybody moves, anybody says anything, cut the boy’s other eye out and feed it to his father. You can breathe, you can blink, you can cry. Hell, you’re all going to be doing that.” He reared back and brought the bat down hard onto the top of Abraham’s head. Abraham, blood streaming down his face, straightened back up almost immediately. “Whoa! Ho ho! Look at that! Takin it like a champ!” Negan laughed, then continued to beat Abraham with the baseball bat until there was nothing recognizable left of his face. Then he stopped and it was quiet again.

You threw up into the grass in front of you.

“You OK, there Princess?” Negan came over and lifted your chin to look into your eyes. “Get OK fast.” He turned to face the group. “So here’s what the rest of your night will look like.” You could no longer see any of your family members through your tears. Bile was burning the back of your throat and you thought you were going to pass out. “You are all going to get in your little RV, and get the two Exorcist characters here,” He waved his bat at Daryl and Maggie, “To some medical care. Then, you will go home. You will go to sleep. Or not, considering the events that have just transpired. Then tomorrow morning, my men and I are going to show up outside of your community, and you will give us half of everything you have and I will give you the rules of working for me. Then we will drive away and see you again shortly. Princess here,” The bat was back in your face, “Is coming with us, because as I stated before, I’ve chosen my live person.” There was silence. “Questions?”

“Yeah.” You spoke up, looking Negan right in the eye. “How soon can you go fuck yourself?”

Negan pulled his pistol and swung it at your head. Everyone in the group yelled out and then there was nothing but black.

——

A/N: First, I’m sorry, but I had to pick a character to die, and I’m personally convinced that it was Abraham, so there’s that. Second, I take requests, so just send me a message or an ask!

[Part Two]

[Part Three]

[Masterlist]

Daryl Dixon IS NOT dying

I actually think of this as an established fact but lately I’ve heard people share their concern so let me emphasize that Daryl is not dying!

It would be bad writing because:
-He is involved in 2 major story arcs that are unresolved 1. Daryl/Carol will they/won’t they arc, and even if you don’t believe in that one 2. The Dwight revenge arc which I imagine will play out most of 7a.
-Speaking of Dwight there is actually some foreshadowing in the episode where he takes Daryl’s stuff. Honey says, “I’m sorry…” and Daryl says, “You’re gonna be…”. He hasn’t made good on this promise, and in fact Dwight has got the jump on him twice more.
-Carol is not there, and they love their emotional outrage. The emotional outrage of Carol being there would be the greatest of anyone on the show and she is busy being shot elsewhere.
-Carol is played by Melissa Mcbride…one of the few people on the show who can probably win an Emmy…yes she would be there.
-Daryl actually had some happy foreshadowing on him at the end of the season. Denise’s speech called him out for not trying despite being a good person who deserves happiness. This was not put in for no reason.
-it’s not a good death for Daryl. Being fan fave and the type of character he is should go out in a heroic way. If he ever dies, he will probably die saving Carol or Rick.
-Daryl has never had a romance. It would not be something they aren’t going to do because a Daryl romance would create more buzz for the show than anything else, way more than his death.
-Daryl has never found happiness….especially this season. it would be a very disservice of his character, and a fan favorite, to not allow him to ever have any happiness.
-It would be purely for shock value, but not follow the story…this is BAD writing, and to be honest I don’t think they’d risk it.
-They did a death fake out in 6x15, it would be bad writing to kill him in 6x16…it reduces the impact of the kill.
-They left it as a cliffhanger which will probably mean it will be a lesser character. starting the season killing Daryl Dixon is not a wise move.

Season Finale Clues:
-The POV shots would indicate that it is either Glenn or Michonne, not Daryl. He is the first person to come out of the van and you see his head at one point
-The storyline strongly points to it being Abraham, if you want to dismiss the POV shots. He had a moment with everyone - Rick, Sasha and Eugene, and both of this plot arcs tied up in 6x14.
-Daryl seems barely strong enough to hold himself up, let alone to get back up after being hit
-Honestly none of the theories based off of clues make sense for it to be Daryl….some people really just want Daryl to die.
-The strongest candidates based on all clues and in story hints point to it being Abraham or Glenn.

Other Reasons:
-He’s Daryl Dixon
-He is roughly twice as popular as Rick, so if you can’t imagine Rick dying, it’s even harder to think of Daryl dying
-I read he makes up for about 75% of revenue in merchandising. Not sure if that’s true, but it seems legit. Most people who have TWD merchandise have some Daryl stuff and I see him on more shirts, etc than any other character.
-He is very good at marketing the show. He’s like a walking billboard.
-People literally will stop watching if he leaves the show. People can lie to themselves and say that’s not true…it’s true. They won’t risk it.
-These are people who like having jobs and money. He makes the show tons of money and gives them a certain amount of job security.
-Doubtful AMC would let them
-Speaking of that death fakeout…it barely was one…they added in that line by Dwight and practically spoiled it on the Talking Dead…..they didn’t want people to think Daryl was actually dead for a minute.
-They gave him a 2nd show. People seem to think this is because he’s leaving, it’s not true. It shows how much they value him…who wouldn’t want 2 piles of money over 1? They wouldn’t leave their sure thing for a risk. Also, the filming schedule conveniently doesn’t interfere with his Walking Dead schedule.
-There’s been many dropped hints from many sources that he will be back for S7.

Hope this helps.

Also, to be fair there are 2 reasons he won’t be back and frankly I just don’t believe either but here they are:
1. Shock value - but that won’t pay the bills or be good writing
2. Norman wants out - he might but I just don’t feel like he does.

They won’t let him go out a virgin, guys!

How to care for your Dweet.

Step one: DON’T GET ONE! IF YOU SEE HER. RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN IN THE OTHER DIRECTION! Mandrake roots are awesome and bring you lots of great magic things, BUT THEY ARE BAD NEWS MAN! I’M WARNING YOU!

Step two: Don’t feed it anything a normal human might eat. DO NOT FEED HER MEAT! She will get VERY SICK and throw up on everything you love. Feed her dirt, eggshells, banana peels, coffee grounds, hard cat/dog food, vegetables of any kind, but no meat. 

Be sure she has lots of water and sunlight as well. This is important.

Step three: Bathe her in milk regularly. I’m not REALLY sure why she likes this, but she does.

Step four: Wrap her in the finest red or white silk.

Failure to do all this will lead to her death, vomit on everything, or Dwight throwing a tantrum and using all her mandrake powers to make your life a living hell.

IMPORTANT: DO NOT MAKE HER SCREAM. It’s fatal to mundies and can make fables black out for varying lengths of time. Could be two hours could be two years, it really just depends.

CARYL Parallel #1$?%€!

A CARYL Oppurtunity

Carol expresses regret to Maggie about not killing Donnie.
She felt that if she had killed him in the woods they might not have ended up in the warehouse kidnapped and responsible for more deaths. 
Maggie and her baby might not have been jeopardized in the way they were had Carol made the kill shot.

TWD “Same Boat” 613

Carol: “I think I might have killed 18 people. 20. Should have killed Donnie too, in the woods. Had a clear shot. I didn’t miss. 
None of this would have happened if I had just killed him.”

Maggie: “Don’t think about it.” 

Carol: “I can’t stop"

In the promo Daryl tells Carol that he should have killed Dwight in the woods when he first came across him and his group
He will believe that even more by the end of the episode because as we know Denise will be killed by Dwight with Daryls own crossbow.

TWD “Twice As Far” 614

Carol: “Those people you met. The ones in the burned forest? They took it from you?”
Daryl: “Yeah”
Carol: “You saved them, right?…I’m sorry. It’s who you are. We’re still stuck with that.”
Daryl: “No, we ain’t. I should have killed them…

That means that both Carol and Daryl are going through the very same type of guilt related anguish and not only that but that anguish is also related to an almost identical situation, that had taken place in an almost identical location.
Carol regretted not killing Donnie in the woods while she could have and now Daryl is feeling the same way about Dwight.
He had the opportunity to kill Dwight and didn’t.
The fact that he found his motorcycle in the saviours den connects Dwight with the people who took Carol and Maggie away and as we know by the end of the episode Denise’s death will unfortunately become attached to Dwight as well.

Keep reading

East - Caryl Edition

Last week, in my analysis of “Twice As Far,” I made the observation there was an apparent return of the “Yin and Yang” dynamic present in Carol and Daryl’s relationship. One that seemed to have been represented both visually (through the light and dark contrast of their clothing) and in their emotional responses to the loss, guilt, fear, and perceived threats that this season has increasingly led them to face. Following last Sunday’s episode, an interview given by Norman Reedus to Entertainment Weekly about “East” also touched on the fight versus flight contrast that I observed was extant between them: “You also see Carol in a whole lot of that right now, but it’s with different outcomes. She just doesn’t want to kill. She can’t kill. And then Daryl can’t hold it in. They’re all very similar, that sort of vulnerability and fight or flight, and it’s a common theme in our show. There are a whole bunch of characters on our show that are going through that in their own way.” Indeed, I would argue that Sunday’s episode presented strong, but contrasting, parallels between Carol’s attempts at flight and Daryl’s attempt to fight. 

Keep reading

Dwight Fact

Due to her small body and minimal body fat, Dwight is very sensitive to temperature. She has gotten very good at predicting whether or not it will be a hot day or a really fucking hot day or more importantly she can tell if the night is going to be cold enough to where she won’t be turned down for night time snuggles. Night snuggles are always wanted, but are easier to get when it’s cold.
So when the Mojave sun starts to set, the wild Dweet will seek out snuggles for the night. Or sleep alone.