Seven Dwarfs Mine Train at Dusk by Michael Boys Via Flickr: This was a beautiful evening at the Magic Kingdom. The sky lit up with numerous clouds catching purple from the setting sun. The full moon perched above Prince Eric’s Castle was the proverbial cherry on top.
We begin with a prologue. A male narrator tells us the story of a secluded kingdom/palace that fell into decay..
The narrator then tells us how his kingdom/palace fell into ruin. The ruler of the kingdom/palace became selfish and heartless, obsessed with one of the “seven deadly sins”: (vanity or greed).
Their selfishness drew a powerful evil magic (an enchantress or a dragon.)
It also drew a curse. The enchantress caused the Prince to turn into a beast. There’s a similar concept in the Hobbit. The gold in Erebor causes the people who obsess over it to get “dragon sickness”– a sort of curse which turns them into gold-obsessed “dragons” (beasts on the inside )….
After this dark prologue, we transition to a beautiful sunny provincial town. It’s a lovely place, but every day is the same as the day before. These hobbits/ townspeople are fussy and simpleminded. They care a lot about tradition and being “respectable.” They deeply mistrust anything new, exciting, or unfamiliar…..
We meet our second hero- a naiive and very bookish person whose name starts with a B. They can have a snarky sense of humor. They “don’t take anyone’s shit” and are far stronger than they look. They can be proud, even a little arrogant at times, but they’re very soft-hearted. They are a “pure cinammon roll.”
This person’s greatest, defining strength is their compassion. They can see the good in everyone, even in creatures who look like monsters (Belle falls in love with the Beast; Bilbo takes pity even on Gollum)
They also have a parent known for being crazy/unconventional– Belle has her father Maurice, Bilbo has his mother Belladonna Took.
Both the protagonists are different from the other simple farmer-villagers because they want more than just a simple life.
They long for adventure….
And they’re eventually dragged into an adventure, against their will.
Our protagonist is forced to meet the The Dwarf-King/the Beast-Prince. This person is brooding, intimidating, and glowering. He rarely smiles. He has a dramatic cloak and an uncontrollable temper. He has a Tragic Past, a bizarre troop of followers, and (secretly) a good heart.
Deep in this King/Prince’s castle is his special glowing Secret Artifact you really shouldn’t touch (Seriously don’t he will FREAK OUT). The reason why the King/Prince needs the protagonist has something to do with this enchanted artifact….
The protagonist makes an agreement to stay with the King/Prince (Belle makes a promise, Bilbo signs a contract.)
They get to know the Prince/King and his more approachable but still very weird group of followers. When the King/Prince isn’t there, these followers sing an upbeat song to the protagonist as they expertly prepare/clean up after dinner (Be our Guest and That’s What Bilbo Baggins Hates.) Their song is so upbeat you forget they’re singing it to a captive audience.
Meanwhile, the relationship between the Prince/Dwarf-king and the protagonist gets off to a very rocky start. The Prince/King secretly cares about the protagonist (later risking his life multiple times for them) but refuses to show it. Instead he acts cold, dismissive, and controlling. The protagonist, meanwhile, doesn’t know that beneath his cold facade the Prince/King really does have a heart.
Their relationship reaches a breaking point when the protagonist makes an innocent mistake, and The Prince/King lashes out at them….
The protagonist decides that, even though they promised to stay/signed a contract, they can’t do this any longer. They try to leave….
But a wolf attack changes everything.
The Prince/King defends the protagonist from wolves (or guys riding on wolves).He’s gravely injured by one of these wolves.
The protagonist then saves his life in return.
This near-death experience brings them closer together.
The Prince realizes he was wrong about the protagonist, and about himself…
”Bittersweet and strange, finding you can change, learning you were wrong!” Versus “I have never been sowrong in all my life.”
There’s a lot of bonding between the Prince/King and the protagonist. The Prince/King becomes kinder, gentler. Their affection for the protagonist, and the protagonist’s kindness to them, makes the Prince/King more openly compassionate. Things are really looking up. It looks like the curse will be overcome (the Beast will become human, and Thorin won’t get the “dragon sickness” that drove his grandfather mad.)
But there’s another force to be reckoned with– a handsome, vain antagonist who loathes the Beast/the Dwarf….
(“I use antlers in all of my decorating!”)
This antagonist convinces everyone the Beast/Dwarf is evil and subhuman. (He’s very against the film’s Beast/human or dwarf/elf relationship). He rallies a massive force to kill the Prince/King.
The protagonist, armed only with one of the Prince//King’s prized sparkly artifacts (the Mirror/the Arkenstone), tries to convince them to stop. But this only makes things worse.
At one point the Prince/King tells the protagonist to leave. Then the Prince/King, feeling betrayed and hopeless, becomes “beast-like” again. The enemy is at his doorstep but he refuses to fight, resigned to his fate. One of his servants/followers tries to convince him to join the battle, but fails. Let them come, the Prince King thinks, let them destroy everything– he’ll remain holed up in his castle. He lets his servants/Dain’s troops fight his battle for him.
His servants/Dain’s army does well without him at first, but eventually he’s forced to join the fray. He fights one-on-one against an army/mob’s leader. There’s a moment where he thinks he’s defeated his foe….but then his enemy launches a surprise attack, stabs him, and mortally wounds him. Yet by killing the Prince/King, the evil guy also ends up killing himself.
The protagonist rushes to the dying Prince/King’s side, blaming themselves for causing his death. The Prince/King, meanwhile, has finally redeemed himself. He apologizes for the way he acted in the past (“maybe it’s better this way”) and speaks lovingly about how wonderful the protagonist is, and how glad they are to see them one last time. The protagonist, meanwhile, desperately insists that he will be all right.
But he isn’t. He dies. The protagonist collapses, weeping.
But then he comes back to life because love!!! In one of the films, anyway. In the other he is 50000 percent dead
Both films have animated and live-action adaptations. In the live-action adaptations, Ian McKellan plays one of the Prince’s allies (Cogsworth/Gandalf) while Luke Evans plays one of his adversaries (Gaston/Bard).
TL;DR: A Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme, Bilbo and the Dwarf (or: the Burglar and the Beast?)
ERIC: He loves his dog. He plays the flute really well and that’s hard to do. Really gentle and sweet. When he found Ariel on the beach he took her home and took care of her. Great smile. Is a chill guy but will also not hesitate to stab and kill an evil sea witch with his boat.
PHILIP: Hears a pretty sound and follows it. Great singing voice. Never realizes that the girl he fell in love with is the princess he’s supposed to marry. Falls so in love that the first thing he does is go to his father and tell him. Has that goofy little hat with a feather. Fought a motherfucking dragon on a cliff.
NAVEEN: Immediately takes off his royal suit into a civilians outfit and disappears playing ukulele. Even though he’s turned into a frog he’s still oozing confidence. Can only mince food, doesn’t know how to do anything else. Made a ring out of scrap even though they’re frogs. Is willing to give everything up as long as Tiana gets her restaurant. Has that nice curl that falls onto his forehead. Unplaceable yet charming accent.
HERCULES: His strength too big for his goddamn body. Goes from zero to a hundred real quick. Even though he can deck a monster in a minute flat he has no idea how to talk to girls. Socially awkward. Good with kids. Can do a push-up on one finger. When told to use his head he took it literally. Punched his uncle, the god of the underworld, in the face.
FLYNN RIDER: Sarcasm galore. The Smolder. Drop dead gorgeous looks. Doesn’t mind that he’s on a wanted poster but does mind that they can’t get his nose right. Is the only one who sees it’s weird to randomly start singing. Can’t fight for shit, barley manages to make do with a frying pan. Has the most ridiculous birth name in Disney history. Got stabbed in the gut but cut Rapunzel’s hair to save her, not at all caring about himself. First words after not dying aren’t “I love you” but “I have a thing for brunettes” because of corse they are.
ADAM: Swooshes his cape around in the shadows like some kind of wannabe batman. Is extra as fuck. Still acts like a child sometimes. Has had no social interaction for years but is trying his best. Gets easily confused. Doesn’t know what to do when he realizes he has feelings for people. Is too shy to tell Belle he loves her. Feels bad the second after he scares Belle away. Would literally rather die then live without the girl he loves. Has the most extra transformation back into a human while everyone else doesn’t.
MAUI: Gets scared easily. Amazing hair. That little face he makes when he can’t use his hook right. Was building a statue of himself in his cave like a dork. Magic tattoos. Can’t fish to save his life. Gave humans fire and wind and coconuts. That smirk he does, you know the one. Great sense of humor. Did everything he could think of to make humans happy so they would like him. Was a total puppy when he got his hook back and fixed.
FERDINAND: So fucking sweet and gentle. Has a name that tells us he doesn’t even need Snow White for animals to follow him around. Sings to Snow White when she’s on her balcony like a modern day Romeo. Knows when Snow White went missing because he kept visiting and goes to look for her right away. Is literally heartbroken when he finds her, thinking she’s dead and is overjoyed when she wakes up. A good boy, a soft boy. Literally has done zero things wrong in his entire life.
ALADDIN: Tricked the genie right off the bat. Jumped right in to help Jasmine with the guards. Steals food but ends up giving it to orphan children living in the street. Is the most selfless person in Agrabah. Quick thinker and can outsmart anyone. Is one of the only Disney princes who actually know how to sword fight. Has matching hats with his pet monkey.
LI SHANG: Sexuality crisis. “You fight good”. Turns a bunch of losers into warriors. Rarely ever wears a shirt for some reason. Tries out his new title of captain alone in his tent all exited like a little kid. Doesn’t give up, not once, on anything. Would literally die for Mulan. Fine as hell.
CHARMING: Gets bored at his own ball. Is a hopeless romantic. Doesn’t care for people who gush over him because he’s the prince, and in fact took interest in Cinderella because she was the only one not doing that. Jumped out a window for Cinderella. Is a super supportive husband. Went door to door looking for Cinderella, determined to find her no matter what. Good dancer.
FELIX: Doesn’t know how to be mean. Considers totally harmless words bad language. Ridiculously short. That video game sound when he jumps. Thinks that by saying Ralph’s catchphrase it will give him Ralph’s power to wreck stuff as well. Can speak qbertese. Dripping with southern farm boy charm. Is a shit dancer but that’s what makes it fun to watch. After accidentally triggering Calhoun he respects her making him leave and never uses the phrase again. Pulls Vanellope back from danger on the rainbow bridge and then makes sure she stays behind him. “Do you think they’ll stop there?” “YES!”
(( If I missed any that you want to see, just let me know & I’ll make a part 2! ))
The Animal Alphabets Fairy Tale Edition continues on. This week was N for Nutcracker. Interesting to learn that the original story is a bit darker than the
ballet that everyone knows. In the original story, a princess is cursed
by the Rat Queen to turn into a nutcracker doll. To break the curse,
the most handsomest man in the kingdom must find the hardest nut and
crack it open with his teeth and must feed it to the princess before her
transformation is complete. However the curse is transferred to the
handsome man and he takes her place as a nutcracker doll. No one tells
him he would inherit the curse and is banished from the kingdom. Its so