duncan lai

He dare not move for fear he’ll wake him. This is an unexpected joy, to feel the soft beats of his small heart against his chest. When Duncan murmurs he lays his hand on his back, and feels the slow rise and fall of the sleeping infant’s breath. He hopes he can be a good father, that he’ll be everything his son needs and more.

It’s been a long journey to get here, for her, memories of loss and the sorrow of the last few years is wiped away with a single cry. She sings a lullaby to calm him. When Shaun finally settles, she nestles him in close and kisses his forehead. She hopes she can be a good mother, that she’ll be everything her son needs and more.

Whether by accident, or meticulously planning, having a child is committing forever to have your heart walk outside your body, to forget the past and to make the future worth living for.


I commissioned the amazing and very talented delborovic to do this piece as an early Mother’s Day gift for myself. 

This is MacCready holding Duncan and Molly (my OC) holding Shaun (pre-war)  

Thankyou Del, this piece is amazing and very close to my heart. it’s wonderful and I can’t gush enough about it.

You can find Del’s art blog commission info here. 100/10 would commission again!

Can we take a moment to go over the way Rachel Duncan says “Nobody lays hands on me” in Nature Under Constraint and Vexed? She has grown up her entire life knowing she was part of an experiment, just another clone. She has been poked, prodded, and tested her entire life up until the point (I assume) that she gained her ‘power’ as the head of the project. When she says that line it’s so full of pent up emotion it rips out my heart and tears it to shreds.

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Formula 17 MV - I Want You music by Celine Dion