i am sitting
outside the theater
on a freezing july night
298 miles away from home
my toes and cheeks are numb
mosquitoes prick feeling through my leggings
and my ears are ringing with laughter
voices too familiar to identify
it’s dark, in the most unsettling way
like maybe it’ll never be light again
like you can’t make out your own hands
much less faces you haven’t known long
she sits next to me and takes my hand
“too many bugs,” she comments
i don’t respond, so she checks her watch
“a couple more more minutes, just hold on,”
so i do
the first explosion comes in a shower of red and white and oohs and aahs
the second comes soon after in a shimmering blue that reflects the water below it
the third is a crackle of green and gold
“it’s my favorite holiday,” she admits,
“it’s kind of mesmerizing.”
i don’t respond, so she leans her warm body against my cold side
it’s my favorite too, i want to say
it’s a magic like no other, i want to say
it’s beautiful, i want to say
you’re beautiful, i want to say
the night is dark in the most peaceful way
and i’m not sure if i want it to be light again
my hand is heavy in her hand
all the faces slip easily into background noise
“it’s my first time away from home,” i say, then add
“for the fourth, i mean.”
she smiles and says, “i hope we’re good company.”
i want to tell her that it’s so much better than good, that it’s the best i’ve ever felt, that it’s euphoria
“it’s not so bad,” i say
the last fireworks explode all at once
shouts ring out around me and
i am met with a perfect silence
friendly reminder that on this night in 1742, there was a hurricane just off the coast of puerto rico, which james norrington tried and failed to sail through, losing in the process his ship, a large percentage of his crew, and the only job position he ever wanted :DDDD
Elections Podcast: Kasich And Cruz Are Scheming (April 25, 2016)
Harry, you texted me last night and said you're going to be particularly talkative today.
I'm ready to be talkative because I have learned that silence and allowing other people to talk sometimes may be shielding them from your true personality and I don't want anyone to have any mistakes about who I am and so I'm ready --
Harry, did you just explain the mansplaining position?
Well, I'm just going to be talkative today and you know, I learned a lesson, which is no more lying, I'm going to be honest with everybody, so let's get this show on the road and let's keep going.
... Whoever hurt Harry, I hope you feel good about yourself.
So today was the first meeting of my Swedish class. The language is fairly easy grammar-wise from what I can tell and also related to German so that makes it a bit easier still. But that pronunciation is gonna kill me some day. Our teacher is a Swede herself and she’s super cute in her accent and general manner.
I’m a bit surprised how relaxed it all was. I’m usually not very comfortable talking to strangers in person and even in school all these speaking exercises in groups or with a partner were a nightmare. Maybe it’s because I’m older, or I got a better grip on my issues now, or just because we’re all sort of adults now. Also I feel like I’m learning because I want to, not because I have to. I think that’s the most important.