I just wanna be someone’s “perfect” ya know? Not the “oh my gosh you’re so beautiful and flawless” kind of perfect, but the “I see your flaws and they fit me like a glove” kind of perfect. I guess you only find that once, and it takes time, but it’s hard to wait for something like that.
Equality Golbat: “Child, adult, doctor, musician, gamer, optimist, pet owner, car enthusiast – These are labels. So I’m pretty sure you don’t actually dislike *all* labels.”
This is the fallacy you commit when saying “I don’t like labels.” Actually, you use labels all the time. Unless you literally only ever refer to yourself as “I” or “this one”, you seem to be a big fan of labels, as long as the particular labels being used aren’t a threat to your privilege. You don’t say “I don’t like labels” when somebody calls you by your name, or occupation, or hobbies. If you object to the labels of white, cis, straight, dyadic, neurotypical, and abled, then say that. If you say you hate all labels, you’re probably lying.
Cracked readers, I want to get to know you better. I don’t actually want to see you in real life and engage you in deep conversation. I’d rather you sum up the infinite complexity residing within the shimmering light of your soul by way of a questionnaire, the most comprehensive way of learning about a person that doesn’t involve hiding in bushes with binoculars.