dude your drama queen is showing

charmingciscolance-deactivated2  asked:

So imagine an Au where Hartley isn't evil and actually is roommates with Eddie and they go out to a club one night and overhear these two guys talking about science and stuff and soon they want to get to know the two and buy them drinks all night.

lmfshdg ok eddie and hartley being roommates is probably the most hilarious thing ever if only bc we all know hartley would be like daaaayum my roommate is fine but why is he so duuuumb like he’s cute but he’s dumb cute and im not sure if i want to tap that

but for some reason im imagining this as like a boarding school au bc yk hartley and eddie both come from pretentious rich families so they end up at this fancy boarding school and they end up as roommates and hartley is like 99.9999% certain he’s going to hate everything (and he does) but eddie is just so??? nice??? 

like it’s legit impossible to hate this guy who looks like a disney prince and laughs off every insult or pa comment and tbh it’s really frustrating bc eddie doesn’t give him anything to work with but that’s how they begrudgingly (on hartley’s part) become??? friends????? AND HARTLEY IS LIKE THIS IS NOT THE LIFE I WANTED WHAT IS THIS “FRIENDSHIP” NONSENSE I DIDN’T COME HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS I CAME HERE TO BE A DRAMA QUEEN AND TAKE OUT ALL MY PROBLEMS ON EVERYONE ELSE

but like eddie is just a really supportive and friendly dude even if he thinks hartley has Issues (he does) and seriously needs to find a better outlet than being a bitch to everyone so this is probably what leads them to sneaking out and going to a club one weekend bc eddie’s like hartley you need to have fun for once in your life and im gonna show you how

obviously eddie got fake IDs somehow (he’s rich so??? im sure it was easy and lbh as much as eddie is usually a stickler for the rules he’s not a total stick in the mud) and tbh when u got hella $$$ i doubt any bartender is really gonna care (they’re probs at least 18 anyway)

hartley, of course, is acting like a wet cat being dragged to the vet and generally going out of his way not to have a good time until he and eddie are at the bar and eddie’s trying to talk him into going to dance with him while hartley is sullenly downing as much alcohol as possible BECAUSE AT LEAST THAT WAY HE CAN FORGET HOW STUPID THIS WHOLE THING IS ALSO WHY ARE THERE SO MANY LIGHTS AND AWFUL TASTES IN WARDROBE AND I SWEAR TO GOD IF THEY PLAY POKER FACE ONE MORE TIME

but that’s when he hears the distant call of SCIENCE!!!! and he actually fucking shuts up for two seconds and eddie knows this is the fucking jackpot right here and he just sort of grins maniacally and glances down the bar at the two guys who are avidly talking about like neil degrasse tyson and the science behind black holes or something (which only inevitably leads into them eventually talking about the physics behind star wars bc they’re hella nerds)

and eddie’s like come on hartley we should go talk to them or at least buy them drinks they’re really cute and they’ve got that whole nerd thing going on

and hartley’s like EXCUSE ME ARE YOU CALLING ME A NERD and eddie’s like omg chill and legit just drags hartley by his stupid cardigan over to barry and cisco and introduces himself and hartley and hartley is just FUMING THE WHOLE TIME bc wow??? HOW DARE HE??? ALSO HOW DARE CISCO EVEN EXIST THIS IS NOT FAIR AND HARTLEY WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS!!!

but hartley at least??? tries??? to be somewhat polite except he probably ends up offending cisco anyway bc he doesn’t really know how to be Nice and his idea of a discussion is literally pointing out everything that is wrong with theories and generally taking all the fun out of speculation but when eddie sees that his conversation with cisco is starting to go a lil south he elbows hartley in the side to get him to try to at least backpedal so he doesn’t ruin his chance to make a somewhat decent impression

and basically this ends in eddie giving barry his phone number and barry being awkward and flustered but flattered at the same time and hartley making absolutely no attempts to give cisco his contact information despite actually being Really Into him bc he’s not just going to give his number to a stranger 

and even tho cisco was a lil put off earlier, hartley doesn’t seem like a bad guy and he is really cute and smart so maybe against his better judgment cisco is like yo do you have facebook… but hartley is like no i don’t believe in social media and cisco is just like oh…. and eddie is just like deep sigh why is hartley so hopeless (he slips cisco hartley’s number when hartley isn’t looking ok not all hope is lost)

Everybody In Their Corner

Welcome to the TWC.
In this corner, we have the Elites. You know who they are. They know who they are. They’re human! Everyone says they’re human! Yet you fear them, and since nobody really knows how many followers they actually have, your perception is their reality. Don’t talk to them. You know you’re afraid of them.

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In that corner over there, you’ve got your Drama Queens and Kings. The ones who show up to start shit. They will discuss fights you missed sometime in the middle of the night, when they’re not starting the fights themselves. The who should be an editor, who sucks at being an editor, why the Elites are obviously not on the list of who shouldn’t be an editor – so sorry, and this will get me a lot of hate but I’m gonna say it anyway. You’ll watch, you’ll click, you might engage. Tread lightly and know that, if you miss this round, it’ll come back in three months. Give it twenty-four hours and everyone will shrug their who-me’s and move on to something else.

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There are a lot of corners here in the TWC. Why isn’t there anyone in the middle of the room? It’s starting to resemble a middle school dance in here. It’s totally cool if you feel like the kid with the braces dancing to music nobody can hear.