dude here are three of them!

9

How Wednesday Addams Would React To Catcalling

Don’t tell Wednesday Addams to smile.In a new episode from the web series “Adult Wednesday Addams,” created by Melissa Hunter, Wednesday follows two dudes home to teach them a lesson after they catcall her. In true Addams family fashion, Wednesday effortlessly scares the men with her piercing tone and sardonic comebacks. (And the three terrifying friends she brought with her definitely helps.)

Watch the full video here and see the catcallers get some of their own medicine. 
Humans Are Space Orcs: Braces

I have been reading a lot of these so here it is,

Just imagine an alien when they find out about braces.

“Do you mean to tell me that you strap metal to your young and slowly move their bones, without pain killers, over long periods of time? The bones that they use to eat? Then make them wear more metal in their mouths for the rest of their life, all for a standard of beauty?”

Nah dude, some do it for medical reasons. I knew someone who had three teeth stuck in the roof of their mouth so they put braces on them and fixed that right up”

“I don’t think I understand”

“They had to do it, because they had already pulled out their baby teeth so they would have had gaps or out of order teeth. Or get infected.

“But how did braces on the outside of their teeth affect the teeth that were *stuck*”

They first had to cut through the bone to get to them and then they stuck brackets on them. But after that, they just dragged the teeth into place.”

“Through the bone?”

“Yup”

"And it worked?”

"Yup”

*horrified aliens* “I thought you said you care about your young”

"We do”

*even more Horrified aliens*

*off to the side* “didn’t the human say they cared about us”

Sam knows a code word when he hears one. Hell, he and Dean have about a hundred or so words and phrases and hand gestures that they’ve accumulated over the years to make a language all of their own. It’s not hard to figure out when something means something else entirely.

Which is how Sam finds out about Dean and Cas’ “secret” relationship. 

The first time Dean asked Cas if he wanted to “play Scrabble,” Sam didn’t really think much of it. Dean and Cas disappeared to do random shit all the time. They were, after all, best friends and pretty much attached at the hip.

But then Dean asked again a couple days later. Then Cas asked. Then Sam realized.

They would disappear into Dean’s room to “play Scrabble,” and then they would come out two hours later looking angry or exhausted or smug or any other emotion to describe that they had just fucked.

Sam elected to ignore it. He didn’t really care if Dean and Cas were secretly fucking as long as they were happy. If things got serious, they would tell him.

That is, until one day Sam walks into Dean’s room without waiting for a “come in” and finds Dean and Cas–

“What the fuck are you guys doing?”

They both look up at him with wide eyes. Dean holds a little wooden letter in his hand and responds, “What does it look like we’re doing?”

“It looks like you’re playing Scrabble.”

“Yeah. Didn’t you hear us say we were going to play Scrabble like an hour ago?” Dean puts his letter down, and Sam sees the word “bullet” written on the board.

“So…that wasn’t…a code word?”

Cas answers this time, “Why would Dean and I need a code word at home when it is only the three of us here?”

“Because you’re–you’re–never mind.” Sam slams the door behind him before they can say anything else.

Muffled through the door, he hears Dean say, “Oh my god, dude, I think Sammy thought you and I were having sex.”

let me talk a bit about my magical royal bangtan au

  • firstly jin, jungkook, and jimin are brothers/princes your kingdom
  • hoseok, namjoon, and taehyung are brothers/princes of the rival kingdom
  • yoongi is a high wizard, the last remaining of his bloodline because his parents gave him up to an orphanage when he was young to protect him from being hunted down by the crown which had declared a war on magic
  • yoongi doesn’t know where his parents are, but in the orphanage he was ridiculed for the spreading of a glowing purple rash that runs up his neck (a common, naturally occurring tattoo for wizards whose familiars are crows)
  • and at the age of eight he broke out using magic and learned to fend for himself, mostly from the black market of potion brewing which he used to sustain himself
  • up until now when he’s apprehended by the royal guards and he thinks he’s going to be like??? thrown in jail but jin explains to him that there’s an oracle loose in the country
  • an oracle that one of the princes has to marry to be able to see the future of the country through the power of eternal love (aka marriage)
  • and yoongi is like wELL how exactly am i supposed to help you with that??? and jin is like “don’t hide it.” and one of the guards tugs at yoongi’s long hood and when it drops the glowing purple tattoo is there
  • and yoongi’s staff which he disguised as a walking stick reacts to the exposed tattoo and shifts back into its original form, along with his crow familiar perched atop it
  • and jin is like “you’re a wizard, you can sniff out another magical aura can’t you?” and yoongi scoffs because like what the hell is in it for him and jin is like “jimin, bring the gold” and at that yoongi’s whole attitude changes because uh,,,,,,money,,,,,,,,,,,,,,YES PLEASE
  • and yoongi tries to reach out to touch it but jungkook unsheathes his sword and yoongi is like ok ok i got it ill find the oracle
  • and guess who the oracle is,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,ITS YOU
  • you just???? don’t know it because your whole life you’ve spent it working for your families grocery store in town and you’re just???? an ordinary person who sells vegetables and fruits alongside your parents
  • but ,,,,,,,, you know,,,,,,sometimes you get dreams so vivid and realistic about future events and a war,,,,,,that might happen between the rival kingdom
  • and you just shrug it off as nightmares
  • but yoongi, he can sense it just by walking by you. there’s something magical, something different
  • and yoongi decides to disguise himself as one of the royal guards and he makes up some story about how the princes have ordered an obscene amount of pumpkins and your family is delighted to send you over with three huge boxes of them
  • but once you’re inside the palace, you get a weird feeling because,,,,,,,common people aren’t,,,,,,,,allowed in here,,,,,,,,,,,,,,like ,,,,,,,,,,,ever
  • and this story about pumpkins isn’t adding up and when you turn to ask yoongi whats going on,,,,he’s shapeshifted back into his normal form
  • and you see the tattoo, the piercing eyes and the huge black-wood staff and crow and you’re like oh S HI T
  • and you’re considering throwing a pumpkin at this dude and just making a RUN for it
  • but the doors in front of you open and you immediately have to drop to your knees because it’s the three noble princes of the kingdom
  • and jin goes “is this them?” and yoongi’s like “it’s the only person with any kind of magic in their aura. it has to be.”
  • and you’re like what the hell is going on,,,,magic is forbidden in this country
  • and that’s how you end up seated at a long table, the three princes and yoongi at one end and you at the other
  • and jin is trying to carefully explain the situation whilst jungkook keeps growling under his breath and yoongi whose shoving his face unapologetically with fancy food
  • jimin,,,,,,,tries to peak looks at you but is too shy if you lock eyes with him
  • and you’re like what,,,,,,wait,,,,,,marriage???????? to one of you???????
  • and jin is like “you can take some time to think about, not long though we need to be married to be able to see the full potential of your prophecies-”
  • but you’re like prophecies???????? im not magical????? sure i get weird dreams
  • and yoongi stops eating just to be like “dream, prophecy same thing.”
  • and you’re flabbergasted to say the least
  • and jin is trying his best to give you a smile, and jimin is like “sorry!!!!! you have to go through this!!!!!!” and jungkook keeps just toying with his sabers handle
  • and you’re like i,,,,,,,,can’t just,,,,,,
  • but jin gets up and makes his way across and takes your hand and he’s like “please, it’s for the sake of this country that we love.”
  • and basically the princes explain that you can live alongside them for a month and see which one of them is best suited to your taste
  • and you’re like ,,,,,,,,,,,, wait is that like ill be dating three????of you?????
  • and jungkook is like “just pick jin, don’t waste time!” but jimin is like “jungkook,,,,,,we can’t just force them ok!!”
  • and you’re like what in the heck

–> Jin

  • he really likes being in the kitchen and learning from the world famous cooks that get hired,,,,,and it’s almost shocking to see him out of his white, elegant outfit and in an apron instead
  • is the oldest and takes care of jungkook and jimin more like his children than his brothers because his parents largely neglected them for their political life
  • so you always see jin internally worrying about his younger siblings and just wishing they’d behave (jungkook more than anything)
  • doesn’t really like fencing or rowing,,,,,,,,his favorite royal sport is archery and you once wake up to see him practicing early in the morning in the gardens and he looks so poised and collected,,,,,,,it’s enchanting
  • if you choose to spend more time with him he tries to teach you to shoot a bow and to do that he stands behind you, arms on your shoulders, than moving your waist to position you and his breathe against your ear
  • and jin is always excited when you talk about your job as a produce seller and he insists on buying from your family owned store even when the cooks are like uh,,,,,,,,we can import something from france-
  • but jin falls in love with your families food and you teach him how your parents taught you to peel potatoes prettily and make sure the cabbage is ripe enough to be fermented
  • and like,,,,,you fall for him largely because he actively engages with you and also he’s such a freakin flirt
  • like he’ll see you wandering around the big palace and say that you look lovely
  • or randomly compliment your voice, or your eyes, or the way you laugh
  • and it gets to your heart really fast,,,,,,,,,,,,

–> Jimin 

  • he’s not all that great at politics, the arguments and constant trickery get him really worked up and so he turns to jin for a lot of the guidance on actual affairs of the country
  • more than anything he loves the arts,,,,,,,,,everything from painting to singing to dancing to sculpting to writing,,,,,,,,,
  • he’s learned every instrument he’s ever been able to get his hands on and he has a teacher for every subject of art he could ever become interested in
  • and the crazy thing is that he really is talented,,,,,,,,,no matter what he tries to do. he draws beautifully, his voice is perfect for singing, and he even dancing like a professional it’s become an annual joy to watch his performances put on at the country national theater
  • but he’s also quite shy and flustered and you’re not sure how to approach him but out of everyone,,,,,,he seems really apologetic and guilty about you having to do this
  • and he tells you quietly once when you bump into each other at midnight in the halls that he wishes you didn’t have to force yourself to fall in love with one of them,,,,,love is something so free and so beautiful and it should happen naturally
  • and for a moment you wonder if maybe jimin knows what love is like,,,,,and how much it should be cherished,,,,but you don’t ask
  • although this talk does somehow make jimin a bit more comfortable around you 
  • like he starts asking you to join him for the tea together,,,,,,,and to maybe try your hand at sculpting with him or learning to play the violin since well you have a month to kill in this huge palace why not
  • but also,,,,,jimin is so attentive and affectionate. he becomes much more clingy the more comfortable he becomes and you notice with how suddenly he isn’t shy to kiss your hand or even touch your shoulder gently when you clumsily hold up the violin
  • and when jimin asks you to tell him about what it’s like to be surrounded by a family that loves and cares for you
  • he can only stare with wide eyes and a warmness when you tell him anecdotes of yourself and your parents
  • and you slowly realize that jimin didn’t get to experience this,,,,,,and that jimin really just wants unconditional love
  • and he’s so soft,,,,,,,he deserves it
  • and somehow you end up deciding that,,,,,,,,,,,you want to give it to him. that unconditional, real love

–> Jungkook

  • is interested in all the cool things he gets to do as a prince,,,,,,,,,,like learn how to sword fight from the country’s top knight and how to ride horseback in a flashy style 
  • and long story short he has no interest in the manners of a prince, the public eye on him and his “grace and elegance” or whatever that stuff is called
  • he wants to be heroic and brave, he wants to be a legend which is why he keeps jumping at all the chances to prove himself physically and jin always has to hold him back by the ear and be like “jungkook. sit down.”
  • likes collecting weapons and keeps insisting that jin let him get karate lessons from a real monk or something and jin is like jungkook. no you don’t need to know karate- jungkook: yES i d O,,,,,,,
  • he has absolutely zero interest in you at the beginning. like he sees you and is like “jin is amazing, marry him.” and you’re like uh,,,,,i don’t know him and jungkook shrugs like get to know him through marriage
  • and he seems to really dislike that yoongi guy and jungkook is like because wizards are historically always up to no good
  • and glances a look at you and is like “oracles don’t seem all that great either” and you wanna be like square up punk but he is the prince so you bite it back
  • until,,,,,,,,,,,,you figure out one day that jungkook absolutely sucks at juggling like out of all things,,,,,,,,the boy cannot juggle
  • and you know how to because out of boredom when you were working at your grocery you used to practice with apples or oranges 
  • and you do it one day to show jimin and jungkook is like “i can do that too” but lmao he CANT
  • and when he drops all the apples to the floor you and jimin are giving him smug smiles and jungkook is like jUST WAIT ILL PRACTICE AND BEAT YOU
  • but ,,,,,,,,,,,, he can’t get the hang of it. and you offer to help him but he refuses point blank and you’re like ok whatever
  • until one day as you’re sitting at the window of the room you were given you hear a maid announce that prince jungkook is coming inside
  • and to your shock there he is,,,,,looking defeated and red in the ears and the butler beside him is holding a basket of apples and you’re like,,,,,,,,,,oh
  • and he’s like “,,,,,,,,,,,,,pl-please teach me how to,,,,,,,,,you know,,,”
  • and you can’t help but stifle a giggle and be like “juggle?” and he’s like gkhfdsaljgfs,,,,,,,,,,,
  • and so you decide why not whats there to lose and so you help jungkook learn the technique
  • and after a week he’s doing really well and he’s like “let me move on to juggling knives-” but you’re like no no nO 
  • and you can’t believe it but jungkook is laughing and having a good time with you
  • and he has such a cute way about him when he’s happy and not trying to put on that indifferent scowl
  • and it’s when you’re out walking through the stables and you see jungkook, forehead pressed to the nose of his horse saying goodnight to it that you figure hey,,,,,,he’s actually Soft isn’t he
  • and jungkook spots you and is like YOU SAW NOTHING,,,,but you’re like i saw everything and it was adorable
  • and jungkook is like “don’t call me adorable. you’re adorable!!!!! not me!!!!” and you’re like woah did you just compliment ???? me ????? in a roundabout way
  • and jungkook flushes red and is like uh,,,,,,,,,what,,,,,,,,,,,,i guess,,,,,i don’t know,,,,,,,,,,you’re cute,,,,,,,ive never felt this before,,,,,,,,help me,,,,,,
  • you: do you still want me to marry jin?
  • jungkook: no,,,,,,,,,,,,,id have to challenge him to a duel if that happened

—> Yoongi

  • is planning on just leaving you with the princes and being on his merry way,,,,,but then he realizes,,,,,,,,,what in the world is he doing giving someone who can predict the future up to a bunch of royals who killed off his bloodline
  • but he knows he can’t just snatch you away again so he decides instead that he’ll stick around and see which prince you choose and then maybe he can take it from there
  • but also,,,,, ever since he brought you to the palace his familiar has been acting weird. like the crow has become ,,,,,,, interested in you and it usually never care for other humans beside yoongi
  • and it takes yoongi quite some time until you pull out from your pockets pumpkin seeds and the crow swoops down from its perch on yoongi’s staff and to sit on your forearm as it pecks away at the food
  • and the three princes are shooing the crow off and yoongi has to catch his familiar and hold it under his cloak 
  • and that night when he’s going back from the palace his familiar won’t stop cawing and it’s annoying him and he’s like “FINE we’ll go back to see them”
  • and to your utter surprise you find yoongi sitting on the balcony outside your window and you’re like “why are you back here???”
  • and yoongi, obviously trying to play it cool is like, “because i,,,,,,,,wanted to see how you’re doing.” and you’re like “i,,,,,,,,,feel really weird and uncomfy,”
  • and yoongi is like dammit ok time to pretend to show feelings and goes “i know it’s scary, but the country-”
  • but he notices you’re not listening and instead looking at his neck and he’s like “what?” and your like “your tattoo is so pretty,,,,,,is it magical?? ive never seen glowing purple ink”
  • and yoongi quickly puts his hand over it and is like “it’s nothing, don’t worry about it.” and you’re like “im not, im just saying it’s really nice to look at.”
  • and yoongi suddenly forgets that he’s supposed to be pretending and he’s like “really? most people think it looks like some kind of disease.” and you’re like “what? no it kinda looks like a little nebula on your skin”
  • the description catches yoongi off guard and he’s like “i should get going,,,,” but before he leaves you ask if he’ll come again and yoongi hesitates but nods
  • and every night yoongi is waiting there on your balcony and he asks which prince you’re interested in and you’re like none of them really and you guys talk more and yoongi can’t believe it 
  • like it might be the fact that you have magic in you like he does ,,,,,,,, but you’re the first person he’s ever had to talk to,,,,,,,, and it feels nice
  • yoongi shows you that his staff can transform into a broom and that’s how he flies up to the balcony and you’re like “flying sounds so fun,,,”
  • and yoongi is like “ill show you, come here” and you, rather fearlessly, get on the broom with him and wrap your hands around his waist
  • and yoongi would turn red ,,,,,,, which he does but it looks even cuter because the tattoo starts to flash and you’re like huh whys that and yoongi is like igNORE it,,,,,,,,
  • and he takes you for a fly around the palace and you can see the lights from the village and all across the country’s mountains
  • and you’re like “this is so amazing!!!!!!” and yoongi smirks to himself because,,,,,,,,,,,ok he’s totally having fun showing off his flying skills right now (even though he won’t admit it)
  • and yoongi comes to terms that his familiar wasn’t acting all that weird the day he dropped you off with the princes, tbh he was looking for an excuse to go back and see you
  • and when the month is up and it’s the night before your marriage yoongi can’t hold back and he goes “run away with me. i can get us out of this country,,,,,,,,,,,,i can’t leave you and your magic in the hands of,,,,,,,those people”
  • and he isn’t even thinking about your powers as something he can sell anymore, he’s thinking about you,,,,,,,as the person beside him,,,,,,,as someone he wants to protect
  • and you’re nervous because ,,,,,, this country needs you right????? but yoongi is living proof that this country hurts those who harbor magic
  • which is why you take his hand and yoongi gets you on his broom and he throws his hood over your shoulders since the night sky is cold
  • and you to vanish from that country,,,,,,,together,,,,,,,,,,to start somewhere new

note: this is super corny im sorry it’s just something ive thought about for ages and could ramble on about because ive made this au so detailed in my mind LOL,,,,,,,,,should i do hoseok + taehyung + namjoon because they actually do fit into this plot but i don’t know if you guys will like this au enough to wanna read about them,,,,,,,,,,,,,anyway!!!!! i hope you enjoyed

“While you’re dying I’ll be
still alive.
And when you’re dead I will be
still alive.“

It must be tough never knowing if your semblance is going to kill your battle partner.

Yes this prompt got that portal song stuck in my head for hours

Day five of Ozqrow Week: Still Alive

Bad Moon Rising (Part 1)

Originally posted by iwriteaboutdean

Summary: Jensen and the reader are doing some filming out in the Canadian wilderness when they decide to take a short hike during a break. The only problem is they don’t show up for their scene later that day…

Pairing: Jensen x reader

Word Count: 3,000ish

Warnings: language, mild injury

A/N: Enjoy!…


Keep reading

lmao a huge part of me is fucking terrified as fuck when even starts talking deeply about islam on the show at some point, if he were to. i’m literally petrified of what people might say.

i can already see it, 

  • “oh no ….. he’s turning. he’s changing. oh no even no no no!!”
  • “even come back you don’t belong there!”
  • “even don’t you think that’s a little too deep?”
  • “even i can’t relate to you anymore.”
  • “even this doesn’t feel like you anymore.”
  • “honestly i feel so :/// uncomfortable with even talking about islam.”
  • “even you’re not moslem why are you talking so deeply about moslems?”
  • “how’s isak gonna feel about this? will he like that even know’s so much about islam?”
  • “poor isak who doesn’t believe in god and has even as his boyfriend who is so interested in islam.”
  • “even …. you’re practically already like half or three quarters muslim lmao you’re hanging out too much with those MOSLEMS!!”
  • “ugh is even with sana and the balloon squad again? i don’t wanna see him with them????”

my dude, i can already smell the islamophobia from here.

anonymous asked:

Any way you could do a camp counseers bugead au? Thanks! 💖💖💖💕💕💕

This ones so cute, oh my goodness!

***
Betty Cooper, without a doubt the most beautiful female to grace MapleOak, summer camp for the neglected and abused, was currently standing beside him, practically bouncing with excitement. Her best friend Veronica lodge, looked severely out of place, strands of pearls hanging over a bright red tank top and tight jeans. Betty on the other hand looked like she belonged here, A loose fitting, soft denim button up rolled at the sleeves, khaki shorts and tiny white sneakers.

She was a vision.

Everyone knew about the two best friends, they were fairly popular amongst the counselor circuit, the campers loved Betty more than any other counselor and there was talk parents paid extra money to have their children placed in her group. Veronica lodge was popular amongst the prepubescent teens at maple oak and serious rival of Cheryl blossom, the other scantily clad camp counselor with fiery red hair.

Speaking of red hair, he slapped his best friend Archie Andrews on the shoulder, catching him staring at Veronica.

“Dude really?”

Archie shrugged sheepishly

“I’ve wanted her since we started counseling here three years ago, give me a break”

As soon as their leader called break and told them to head off and get their group assignments, Jughead spun around, bumping forehead to forehead with none other than betty cooper.

Placing his hand to his forehead and rubbing, he looked up and caught the most beautiful green eyes he’d ever seen.

“Ouch” she giggled.

“Shit” he said shaking himself out of his thoughts “I mean … shoot. I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking.”

She shook her head laughing
“No harm no foul, Jughead, Jughead jones right?” She stuck her hand out “Elizabeth Cooper, but you can call me Betty.”

She knew his name?

“I know who you are, it’s kind of hard to not know who you are, miss counselor of the year.”

She blushed “oh jeez, that’s all talk, I just love the kids.”

He nodded, dazed. Did her hair always look so silky?

“Sure, yeah me too.”

“Did you get your group assignment yet?” She asked politely.

Shaking his head

“No, I’m headed over there now.”

She smiled brightly taking him by the arm.

“Oh Great! Me too, I could use an escort!”
Suddenly he was being dragged to the table and she was shifting through the paper work.

“Aha!” She smiled holding two pieces of paper in the air “Elizabeth Cooper & Forsythe Jones, forsythe?” He blushed looking down “its cute, I like it.” Her eyes scanned her paperwork quickly smiling, “not bad! I’ve got a good crew this year! What about you?”

Jughead looked his paper over, he’d had all these kids before it was gonna be good to see how they were growing up, make sure they were okay.

“Oh!” Betty smiled peeking over his shoulder, “were bunk buddies, how cool is that! I’ve always only had Kevin! It’s like fate right juggie?”

He smiled softly, he’d never heard that nickname before, it sounded good coming from her. Sending a quick thank you to god for not pairing him up with Ethel again, he nodded as enthusiastically as a moody, angst filled boy could.
“ it’ll be cool, I’m warning you, I snore.”

She giggled, “well lucky for you I fall asleep to music anyway”

“I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS.” They both drew their eyes over to Cheryl blossom, who seemed to be throwing a temper tantrum regarding her group.

Suddenly Veronica and Archie were by their sides, Veronica rolling her eyes

“Here we go, drama queen alert.”

Cheryl was ranting and throwing her paper on to the table “I am not taking this brat! You people put me with him last year and he tried to steal all of my clothes. It’s not happening. It’s me or him.” Before he knew it Betty had left his side and was speaking to the camp leader

“I can take him. There’s always an extra visitors bunk, and I don’t mind having an extra camper.” She shrugged her shoulders , the camp leader looked about ready to kiss her feet.
“Thank you ms.cooper, Cheryl I don’t want to hear another word about your group or you’ll be gone, understood?”

The redhead nodded, throwing Betty a smirk

“It’s your funeral.”

Rolling her eyes, Betty moved back to his side.

“I’m so sorry I did that, I wasn’t thinking. Is it okay that we added another camper to our bunk, I’m sure I can talk to..”

He cut her off squeezing her shoulder

“It’s fine bets, what’s one more?”

She smiled gently, squeezing his hand

“Thankyou”

Suddenly the whistle was blown and it was time to meet the campers.

Veronica grabbed Betty and turned to the boys

“Ready for one crazy summer?”

Jughead met Betty’s eyes and smiled

Archie laughed

“I’m so ready.”

Tacoma Knight

For @a-daydreamers-stories

Happy/Plus size reader

I’m not going to lie. I have a huge crush on Mr Sexy Biker that comes into the store for cigarettes every day. He always winks at me and calls me baby girl. He probably tells all the girls that to get what he wants though. A guy that hot would never go for a girl like me. Not at my size. But nevertheless I want to faint when he comes in. Which would suck. Because then I’d miss the chance to see him for the day. As he makes his way through the store every day I can’t help but to fantasize what it would be like to have him. For him to touch and worship every inch of my very thick body. For me to rub my hands over his sexy tattooed bald head while he digs his face into my chest. I think it’s hotter in here than before. On schedule Mr sexy comes through the door. He rarely buys anything but cigarettes. But he always makes his way and takes his time through the store.

“Good afternoon. Welcome to the Little Charming Corner store.” I manage not to fumble my words. I seriously hate saying that every time someone walks in. But for him I’d say it a thousand times.

“Hey baby girl” His rough deep voice giving me goosebumps.

He continues with his daily ritual. Checking out the magazines. Looking at the news papers. Etc. I try not to look obvious but I cannot stop staring. The ding of the door wakes me up from my daydream and I repeat my entrance speech. Three guys walked in. Real asshole looking guys too.

“Ew! I heard one of them say. I had no idea what they were talking about. “Thought you said the girl that works here is hot?!”

“She is! She must only work nights or something.” Said the one that appeared to be the leader of their little douche bag club.

“Figures. For real though, this one’s a cow” The third one tried to say under his breathe. But it was too late. The damage was done. Tears began to well up in my eyes. I looked down into my lap. I would never understand how people could be so cruel to people they didn’t even know.

Unfortunately for the douche bag club, Mr biker had also heard them. And if looks could kill, the three would be on the ground instantly. Good thing the owner of the store didn’t have an active working camera. It was there for show mostly now. Because Mr sexy pulled out his gun as he stormed straight for the ring leader. They guys all froze as he put his gun up to the leader’s forehead.

“What did you just say to this lady here?!” He seethed through his teeth. “Apologize. Now!” He roared. I couldn’t believe he was defending me. He was my Knight.

“Dude. We’re so sorry.”

“Not to me. To her!”

“Ma'am we’re s-so s-sorry.” The leader manages to choke out.

“Get the fuck out!” Biker yelled as the three scrambled out almost tripping over each other. He put his gun away and stormed over to the counter.

“I don’t know how to… I mean… thank you so much.” I managed to mutter.

“They won’t be bothering you again beautiful. Promise.”

“Your usual?” I asked him.

“Yeah baby doll. And put your number on the receipt.”

“Pardon?” I questioned. Did I hear him right?

“Put your number on the receipt. I’m taking you out to dinner. I’ve been trying to work up the nerve to ask you for weeks. I’m Happy.”

“I’m happy too… thank you again for helping me…”

“No, my name’s Happy” he grinned. He paid for his cigarettes and gave me a wink. “I’ll call you soon baby girl” Happy turned to leave the store. I was in awe at what just happened. Surely it was a dream. Then he stopped at the door.

“And what should I call you beautiful?” He asked. Honestly he could call me whatever. I was going to go in a date with Mr Sexy Biker himself. I could have died. But I gathered myself and mustered my strength and told him my name.

(Y/N).

He gave me another wink before he left..

Originally posted by redwood-orginals

Imprisoned AU

AU where the bros are actually inmates in prison.

Gladio is there for assault. Despite how menacingly jacked he is, he has the smallest sentence out of all of them, he just got a little too angry one day while drunk and accidentally may have broken the limbs of some poor guy.

Ignis is there for attempted manslaughter and murder. As it turns out, he created an elaborate scheme where he indirectly forced two coworkers to try and kill each other, then finished the job himself after. Just for fun, and to see if he could do it. If you ask him for details, he just smiles.

Noctis is there for theft and sexual assault. “Which isn’t true, she came onto me first. I just took a little compensation from her.”

“Dude, you somehow managed to take her car, her father’s car, her grandma’s jewelry and… and everything including her doghouse in a single night, how is that a little?”

“Meh. If you want a night with me though, the only compensation I’ll need is you being good to me.”

Prompto can only laugh nervously because this guy has already stolen his heart even before he said anything. Stupid master thieves with their dark and mysterious looks, chiseled features and hauntingly beautiful blue eyes.

Prompto gets put into the same cell as them, and it doesn’t take much to realize this cinnamon bun doesn’t belong in prison. They get to know him. They see how he misses his family, and how he’s good animals (even the guard dogs like him?? He’s like a freaking Disney Princess, birds gather around him during lunch time) Ironically though, he’s got the longest sentence of them all; he’s imprisoned for life.

“I-I don’t think I did it?” Prompto stammers, an incessant stream of tears flowing from wide, innocent eyes. “But maybe I just don’t remember and I actually did? I don’t know, I’m just really confused and I don’t want anyone to get in trouble but…”

And that’s how he kept bawling when they tried to ask about what he did. As it turned out, Prompto was just too scared to testify against someone else and all the blame got put on him. Over time, the three of them get attached to Prompto and they decide to break him out. They use every scrap of violent muscle, psychopathic genius and sly trickery between the three of them to do it.

So they nearly make it out of prison when the head security guard catches them. (It’s Regis, and his son is about to have the grounding of his life along with his friends.) Noctis, Gladio and Ignis all resign themselves to their increased sentence, because they honestly gave it their best effort and would likely fail if they tried again.

Until Prompto comes in, guns in both hands and shoots everyone in the room.

“Prompto, what the Astrals—That was my Dad!”

“Dude, these bullets are all rubber, you don’t think they actually give real ones to the guards around here do you? They’ll wake up with like, bruises tomorrow.”

As it turned out, he was a government agent from a different country (cough Niflheim cough) and had tried to assassinate the Lucian councilmen—and succeeded in multiple occasions while stealing highly classified secrets to boot. He’s supposedly given the authorities the slip dozens of times, giving him the title of “Quicksilver”, the infamous and deceitful Agent NH-01987. In the end, Prompto ends up breaking the three of them out of prison, not the other way around.

“Iggy, I thought you were supposed to be in here for your evilly genius brain, but you couldn’t even figure out what I am?”

“The amount of times you’ve slipped on your own candy wrappers have been awfully convincing,” Ignis adjusted his glasses. “You certainly are deserving of your title, eight-seven.”

“That…” Prompto looked away, embarrassed. “That wasn’t an act, actually.”

Then, with Prompto’s mad skills, they break out of prison, steal a really cool sportscar for their getaway vehicle and live happily ever after. :D 

But they’re still a little psychopathic so they raise hell everywhere they go. :3

Following The Colorful Paws

Title: Following the Colorful Paws

Author: @jensen-jarpad

Characters: Jensen x Reader

Word Count: 1033

Warnings: NONE! The only thing you’ll find here is pure fluff from beginning to end

A/N: This is my fic for Elsie’s challenge ( @sleepywinchester ) <3 The “prompt” is “your URL + Easter”. Hope you all enjoy

Feedback is always appreciated! ❤


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From: Holster     To: Dex

-extra-

Dex: I’m still not doing you, Holster…but thanks, dude. You’re a good captain.

Holster: Did William Nancy Jane Bartholomew Elizabeth Jackson Alexander Zane Myron Macaroni Toothbrush Wilson Poindexter just compliment me? Whoa.

Dex: First of all, that is not my name. And three or four of those names were girl’s names. And two of them were objects. What the fuck?

Holster: If Shitty were here, he’d be giving you a full lecture about how names aren’t gendered, but I don’t have time for that. I honestly just forget your middle name and started ad-libbing. But then I couldn’t stop because I kept coming up with more and what if I actually guessed one right?

Dex: It seriously occurred to you that my middle name might be Macaroni?

jeremy versus the best friend

pairing: michael mell/jeremy heere

words: 806

warnings: fighting, not graphic though

notes: so this is a spy (chuck) au im testing out,, im thinking of a multiched fic for it but im not sure so have this crap afkj i wrote it at 3 am and didnt edit

ao3 link


“I’m sorry, buddy,” Jeremy mumbled, his back pressed against Michael’s, their hands cuffed behind their backs in the training room of their own base.  “I didn’t mean to drag you into all of this.”

“You’re a spy,” Michael mumbled again, still not believing what was happening to him.  Still not believing that he had just heard his best friend admit that he was a spy to the leader of a terrorist organization.  “You’re a spy!  Dude, that’s like the coolest thing ever!” Jeremy could feel Michael squirming.

“Heh, thanks.  It has it’s moments,” Jeremy replied, eyeing the guard at the door.  He knew their leader would be back soon.  “Like I know martial arts.”

“What?!  No way!  Why didn’t you, ya know, use it before?” Michael asked, referring to when they were captured.

Jeremy groaned quietly.  “Well I don’t know know martial arts— it’s this computer thing?” Jeremy tried his best to explain, wishing he could demonstrate instead.  “Basically, I’ve got a computer in my brain.”

“Sounds dangerous​.”

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anonymous asked:

Eleanor! You have to turn those tags about Even being tall into a text post! You have to!

hmmm? you mean those tags about Even being super tall and Isak being super into it? because, okay!

listen, there’s no way Isak ever shuts about Even’s height, okay? and like, at first the boys thought it was kind of sweet, Isak mentioning how tall his bae was every seventh sentence. because here was their dude, who they all love so much, slowly getting comfortable talking openly about other dudes, and all three wholeheartedly support that, are proud of that, and so they kind of went along with it. but then, like, they do start to get about tired of it at some point? because it’s been two whole months, Isak, get over it, and also, he knows they have eyes, right? like, they can see Even. Jonas tells him this, straight up, because of course he does, but Isak’s like, not even hearing them? he’s just nodding with that faraway look in his eyes.

so they had to come up with a different strategy to make Isak stop talking about Even’s height, for the love of god, please make him stop talking about Even’s height. and so now whenever they hear Isak mention the words Even and the highest shelf in the supermarket they immediately start to talk over him like, yes we know. your boyfriend is super tall. he is the tallest in the world. nobody is as tall as he is. not one single person. Isak gets the message at some point and stops telling the boys about it but they catch him talking to some random girl at a party about his super tall boyfriend, the blonde on over there, in the corner, you see him? he’s really tall. the tallest. they never let Isak live this down and start referring to Even as The Tallest Boy In The Universe for three consecutive weeks, at least. Even loves this of course. makes an entire yell out of it because of who he is as a person. who am I? he shouts. Even! the boys yell. and what am I? he shouts yet a little bit louder. the tallest boy in the universe! the boys yell back.

Isak ignores them for at least two whole hours.

I don’t know if this is the most obvious thing, but Viktor was indirectly responsible for Yuuri losing at the Grand Prix Final

So yesterday I was watching yoi again and as I was watching the scene where Yurio and Viktor were talking before Yurio hit the ice (you know, this one)

I realized something. Viktor was playing Yurio like a fiddle (assuming he knows how to fiddle. Probably doesn’t. Moving on.).

Now, when I first watched this scene, nothing made sense to me. Not Yurio’s urgency, not Viktor’s ominous answer, not even why they chose to give Viktor the Serious Anime Profile Shot, the one they usually give to villains and the like. It all went straight over my head. But as I was watching this the second time through, it finally clicked; why this scene was pivotal, important, why it had to be included. 

My conclusion is based on four things: the aforementioned scene, Viktor’s reaction to Yuuri’s retirement, Yurio’s free skate at the Rostelecom Cup, and another scene I didn’t understand back in episode ten. It’s the scene where Viktor is overlooking the beach and Yurio decides to kick him in the back because what are friends for, you know? This one:

See, when I first watched this, I had absolutely no clue what was the reasoning behind this scene. Why would Yurio kick Viktor’s back? Why would Viktor just take this angsty fifteen year old’s shit? Why would Yurio say that he doesn’t look up to a five-time world champion? I imagine you’re thinking that he was lying because Yurio is a teenage shit that we collectively love. With that I agree, that yes, Yurio was not being completely honest. When would he ever admit he admires someone? It’s simply not in his character. But there may be some truth in his statement. Yurio may admire and respect Viktor for his skating skills, but he may not be who he truly views as competition, and Viktor’s private revelation supports my theory twice over.

This reveals three things. One: Yurio is an extremely competitive person. Two: Yurio is most competitive when he is facing off against Yuuri. Three: Viktor knows all of this (obviously. These are his thoughts.). Now you’re probably a bit skeptical over one and two, so let’s break those down.

Firstly, I believe we can all agree that Yurio is a competitive person. However, Viktor’s thoughts reveal what drives this competitiveness. Viktor says that if he had stayed in Russia as a competitor, Yurio wouldn’t be as motivated. When Viktor says “as a competitor” he reveals that Yurio is motivated not by a drive to outperform himself but to outperform others. Yurio wants to win, and he actively wants the others to loose. He is driven by the competition, not just by himself or the prize.

Secondly, Yurio is most competitive when he is competing against Yuuri. If Viktor had stayed in Russia, he would never have coached Yuuri and Yuuri would never have improved so much. This entire series would never have happened. Yurio, of course, would most likely have made it to the Grand Prix Final, but instead of facing Yuuri he would be facing Viktor. The only factor that definitely changes, at least from Viktor’s perspective, is Yuuri’s participation in the Grand Prix. Therefore, by him saying that Yurio wouldn’t be as motivated if he had stayed in Russia, he reveals Yurio is motivated more by Yuuri. Need more proof? Look no further than our second piece of evidence; the Rostelecom Cup from episode nine.

As you remember, the Rostelecom Cup was the second time Yuuri and Yurio had gone toe to toe, and first time in the Grand Prix series. During his free skate, Yurio does something peculiar for someone who scored well on his short program.

Yurio put six jumps in the second half of his program so he could score higher. Why would someone who has scored so high feel the need to raise the difficulty of his program? Since we are dealing with Yurio here, it is because he wants to make sure that he outperforms his competitors. This is supported by the next scene, when he judges his program against others:

He deliberately upped the ante to beat them because he is such a competitive little dude. And what does this result in? Well, according to Yuuri:

A performance beyond his limits. Yurio is so competitive that he pushes himself to the breaking point to beat JJ and yes, our little katsudon Yuuri. Yurio respects and admires Yuuri’s skating ability. He first thinks about Yuuri’s three quads as opposed to JJ’s four. Why would Yurio think about Yuuri first when JJ is objectively stronger competition if he didn’t view Yuuri with more respect? You could argue that he doesn’t respect Yuuri because of his behavior at the last Grand Prix Final, when he told him to “just retire already,” in the bathroom. In which case I shall point you to the Onsen on Ice, episode four. Yurio had just watched Yuuri’s performance, and he leaves before even hearing the results. He knew Yuuri had beaten him, and for someone so competitive, I doubt such a defeat would rest easy with him. I theorize that is when Yurio began to view Yuuri as a true threat in competition, and thus admired his skating skills. So when Yurio shows up and kicks Viktor in episode ten, Viktor now realizes this. He is aware of what drives Yurio’s most astonishing performances, what makes him tick and what makes him push himself beyond his limits. 

Moving on to our third piece of evidence. The next scene that supports this theory is at the beginning of episode twelve, when Yuuri tells Viktor he wants to retire. Viktor reacts angrily, correct?

It’s pretty clear he is not just accepting this. I mean, you’ve got this guy crying out of anger. He is on a whole new level of not okay. Knowing Viktor, do you really believe he is going to just let Yuuri retire when he believes he has so much to offer to skating? 

He knows Yuuri can do better, and as a supportive fiancé, he wants him to. This guy isn’t going to let Yuuri leave; at least, not without trying to stop him.

So what is a five-time world champion, first-time coach to do when your fiancé is about to win a gold medal and then immediately retire despite having so much to offer skating? How could he get him to stay? Well, by making sure he does not win gold.

We already know Viktor knows that Yurio is extremely competitive and thinks Yuuri as a top contender. Viktor also knows that Yurio is an excellent skater, and a strong rival to Yuuri. So is it not natural that Viktor goes and seeks out Coach Yakov just before Yurio is about to go skate, when he knows Yurio is going to be with him? When he knows Yurio is going to hear every word of his conversation? That he gives cryptic answers that provoke a dangerous level of rage in the angsty little guy who is driven by competition?

Look at him. Yurio is in shock. He is fricking pissed. He does not want Yuuri to retire, not his greatest rival, not someone who could (and has) actually beaten him! How can he compete against him if he’s retired? He can’t! Who is going to push him in competition if he’s gone? No one! Yurio is aware of this; you only have to look to his thoughts during his performance just minutes after this encounter.

He is pissed that someone he respects will retire if he wins the gold. He wants to challenge himself by competing against Yuuri and damn it, he can’t if Yuuri just up and leaves! He won’t let this happen! He can’t! Yuuri cannot win gold! So what does Yurio do?

He adds another quad. Specifically to keep Yurio from retirement. He pushes himself to the limits just like in the Rostelecom Cup, just so he can win gold and keep Yuuri skating and therefore, competing against himself. 

And, just like in the Rostelecom Cup, Yurio has a breakdown on the ice. Except he’s crying and so is my heart.

So, back to the point. Now I know what you’re probably thinking: This was all a coincidence, Viktor didn’t want Yuuri to loose, he didn’t anticipate Yurio’s vehement reaction! In which case, I have one last bit of evidence to show you!

Let’s go back to a bit earlier, just after Viktor hinted at Yuuri’s retirement to Yurio. Remember that Serious Anime Profile Shot I mentioned earlier? The scary one where the animators somehow made Viktor Nikiforov look intimidating? Well just after he sees Yurio’s visible reaction:

where we actually see the disbelief and coming rage on his face, the camera shows us that Shot of Viktor.

THAT SMILE. That smile is the smile of a man who knew exactly what reaction Yurio would have and how it would play out. He was distraught that Yuuri was going to retire, and knew knew exactly how to use Yurio, the only person who could possibly score above Yuuri, to ensure that Yuuri would not win gold. He had motive and means. Case closed. 

Tl;dr: Viktor, upset over Yuuri’s decision to retire, manipulated Yurio by hinting at this and thus inciting rage within Captain Angsty Teen to have him outscore Yuuri and not win the gold medal. 

Hell's Angels (M)

*because I’m extra*

Request: #36 Namjoon Drabble 

Word Count: 8.1k

Originally posted by rapnamu

A pitch black darkness that preceded after a spatter of red clouded in his vision. The world around him felt cold and heavy. His limbs lost its feeling as if he had phantom limb syndrome. The smell of gunpowder dusted itself over his noses and the loud bang of a bomb going off jolted him awake, his eyes opening.

“It took you long enough.”

“W–Where am I?” It looked like an abandoned mall, glass storefronts broken, the escalator stopped working and there were small patches of fire in some places. There was a boy, maybe three years younger than he was, firing from this range and shooting down people.

If he didn’t know any better, he would have thought he was trapped in a video game.

“The dead zone.”

“Dead zone?”

“For a new recruit, you sure do ask a lot of questions but do little action.”

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Worlds Collide (Part 1)

Castiel x Reader 

Word Count: 1.4K

Warnings: brief canon-style violence, mention of blood, swearing.

A/N: My awesome title naming skills strike again! This is another Anon request (possibly 2 in 1?). It will be a Castiel x Reader fic, with a twist? (no spoilers!) It’s a different feel for me, but very fun to write. This will be a mini series at the very least, depending on how carried away I get. Oh, and I made a silly little aesthetic/collage (whatever they’re called) thing. So, yay me.

Anon request: “heyyy i’ve got a prompt for you for whenever you have time… J2M gets transported (by my bby Gabriel) to the SPN world and meets TFW + the reader??? maybe throw in some lovin’ for my boy cas? or misha? take it wherever you want :) thanks!”

Worlds Collide Master List

Gabriel had been horrifically bored for weeks, unable to find a single soul worth pestering. Sam and Dean weren’t amusing anymore, and Castiel never got his jokes. The clueless look on his brother’s face didn’t even make the amber-eyed archangel smile anymore.

So, the angel scanned through every dimension he knew of, in search of his next victim. But, with every new land he trekked, he grew more and more discouraged. Maybe he was doomed to infinite boredom? He sure as hell hoped not. Gabriel rolled his eyes as he snapped his fingers for the n’teenth time.

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maniacani  asked:

Does Keith open up to the others (the paladins and allura) some more in the PJO au? I bet he clicks with all of them differently-sparring with lance, strategy talk with Allura, fixing things/helping pidge and hunk etc? and Shiro finds that endearing to no end (Hades does too "my son has friends!!!")

[Voltron PJO AU] Ever since Shiro and Keith “sort of” announced to the whole camp that they were finally together, Shiro had noticed little changes from Keith. Aside from being more affectionate towards him (cuddles increased by 500% which Shiro wasn’t complaining about), and the sweet little kiss they shared once in a while, Shiro noticed that Keith had been more tolerable towards other demigods and that he actually didn’t just walk away and leave them whenever they wanted to talk to him.

First was Pidge and Hunk. Shiro was invited by them to Bunker 9 in regards to something they have created that might be helpful around camp. Obviously that meant Keith would tag along. Bunker 9 was a hidden workshop for the Hephaestus Cabin and it was huge. They only gained access because of Hunk’s fire abilities to which Keith commented “That’s pretty cool.” It made the son of Hephaestus beam brightly like the sun. 

So Pidge was discussing about their new creation and Hunk saying something seemed off that they couldn’t put their finger on. Shiro thought about it for a moment to help his friends but couldn’t come up with anything. The room was silent and everyone could hear each other’s brains ticking. It was broken off when Keith spoke.

Keith had his hand under his chin as he roamed around the contraption Hunk and Pidge built. He was spouting this and that, things that even Shiro couldn’t even grasp. Keith spoke for about 10 minutes, giving his suggestions and comments while the three of them just gape at him. 

“What?” Keith asked as he saw them staring at him. 

“Keith, I love you!” Pidge cried out as she threw herself at Keith and kissed him loudly on the cheek, which caused Shiro to smile so wide.

“Dude, that’s brilliant. If we just connect this to that then BOOM. It’ll work so perfectly!” Hunk laughed. “Oh gods, I love you, man.” Then he proceeded to join the hug. “You should hang out with us here at Bunker 9 more often.”

Second was Allura. It was during battle strategy meeting and Shiro, Pidge, Keith and Coran were present. Allura was discussing what they ought to do when Keith interrupted her.

“That’s total suicide, Allura,” Keith said.

“Excuse me?” Allura asked, eyebrow raised, clearly offended.

“If you place the most of the children of Apollo there, they wouldn’t stand a chance even if they had amazing archery skills. They would be slaughtered in mere minutes because you have to spread out the healers.”

Allura shifted her weight and crossed her arms. “So what do you suggest we do then?”

Keith looked at her straight in the eye, “I’ll go with the children of Apollo.”

“Keith, that’s—” Shiro objected loudly. He wasn’t liking it.

“Shiro,” Keith turned his head towards his boyfriend. “They need a Big Three with them and with you and Lance in your own positions, I’ll be the only one who could shadow travel and be anywhere quickly. Time is our enemy here.” Keith returned his attention to Allura and added with determination. “Place me with the archers.”

Allura smiled at Keith and nodded. “Alright.”

Last was Lance. It wasn’t a secret that they have this weird I-hate-your-guts feeling towards each other. It must be because Lance was the son of Poseidon and Keith was the son of Hades, it would only be natural that they were antagonistic towards each other because of their heritage. So their rivalry was born. Trying to one-up each other, though Shiro felt that it was very one-sided, but that didn’t stop Lance. However, Lance mellowed down ever since he saw Keith appear at the dining pavilion holding Shiro’s bloody body, crying

One time Shiro was walking past the arena and the two boys were sparring and Lance somewhat landed a hit on Keith’s shoulder with his sword, that caused him to fall out of balance on the ground, bleeding nonstop. Shiro was about to help when Lance pounced towards his boyfriend quickly. 

Lance panicked. “Oh gods, Keith!” The son of Poseidon tugged Keith’s shirt as quickly as he could and brought his hands with a ball of water surrounding it and began healing Keith’s injury.

“Dude, you could do that?” Keith asked, bewildered. 

“Yeah, I discovered it a few weeks ago,” Lance chuckled, sounding like he was about to cry. His mouth was wobbly as he observe Keith trying to test his shoulder when all of a sudden Lance hugged him tight. That surprised Keith (and Shiro) because he had never done that before. “I’m so sorry, buddy.” Lance sobbed and Keith smiled as he brought his hands up to return the hug.

“It’s okay, Lance. I didn’t die,” Keith chuckled.

“Thank the gods. Because if you did, your Daddy’s going to kill me himself.” Lance cried out in horror. “And put me in The Fields of Punishment!”

Shiro smiled so wide as he observe the scene in front of him. Keith was laughing and he was so endeared that Keith was opening himself up more to others. Shiro was so busy looking fondly at his two friends that he didn’t notice someone stood beside him.

“My son has friends,” Hades sniffed, looking like a damn proud parent. “My little bat, so precious. I’m so glad that people are gradually seeing how wonderful Keith is. I hope this continues.”

Shiro was surprised to see the god of the Underworld but he just smiled to himself and hummed, “Me, too.”

I think I’ve made this obvious already but I sold my soul to Justice League Gods and Monsters guys goodbye

THE PREMISE IS ESSENTIALLY THE BIG THREE, SUPERMAN, WONDERWOMAN, AND BATMAN ARE FLAWED INDIVIDUALS WITH THEIR OWN ISSUES BUT WHO STILL WANT TO HELP AND SAVE PEOPLE

AND EVERYBODY AROUND THEM, FROM SCIENTISTS TO THE GOVERNMENT TO FREAKIN’ LOIS LANE, IS AT LEAST 50X MORE OF AN ASSHOLE THAN THEY ARE

THE GOVERNMENT BLACKMAILED THEM INTO BECOMING THE JUSTICE LEAGUE

LOIS LANE AND THE PRESS SMEARS THEM ALL OVER, ESPECIALLY SUPERMAN

BUT THESE THREE???? 

THEY’RE ASSHOLES WITH HEARTS OF PURE GOLD. 

People keep telling them “if you were real heroes you wouldn’t kill people” and they’re like “fuck you dude why don’t you try saving the fucking world without casualties it’s not as fucking easy as it is in your fantasies” 

People keep treating them like monsters

But the three of them, their relationship is so good, there’s some actual deep emotion going on there, a lot of vulnerability, and they genuinely care about each other and the lives of human beings

Superman was raised by Mexican immigrants who were laborers who were treated like crap and harassed by white people

Also Superman and Batman here are so????? 

TWO THINGS

ONE:  KIRKBAT IS PROBABLY IN LOVE WITH SUPES LET’S BE HONEST HERE

TWO: This really shows how compassionate Superman is under the whole asshole facade. He’s so sensitive to people who are in need, regardless of what other people think. “You were hungry”, because it was as simple as that. He knows what it’s like to need, to want for things, to hunger. This Superman has experienced real human hardship and responds to it in others with love and compassion. 

Low key sweetheart. His name is Hernan Guerra and he’s my fave. 

Kirkbat was a scientist by the (probably familiar) name of Kirk Langstrom and HE’S THE SWEETEST DORK 

PROTECT HIM

yeah he like

eats people

drinks their blood

but still

protect him

poor bb

AND WONDY

I LOVE HER BECAUSE SHE’S JUST SUCH A WELL ADJUSTED BUT VULNERABLE PERSON

WHO LOVES SPARINGLY BUT DEEPLY AND HAS A STRONG SENSE OF JUSTICE

PROTECT HER TOO 

anyways guys go watch the movie before you read the comics (9 main, 9 origin story issues) and watch the shorts on youtube (Justice League: Gods and Monsters Chronicles) so you get the full experience

i love them so much idek