dryer baby

April Fool’s Headcanons

All of the Amis participate, but every year, Bousset, Grantaire, Bahorel, and Courf go all out. 

  • Bousset filled all the Oreos at a meeting with toothpaste
  • Courf covered every surface in Enjolras’s apartment in aluminum foil
  • Bousset somehow got his hands on thirty seven air horns, and placed them behind doors, under chairs, even under the gas pedal in Grantaire’s car (which he didn’t find for another week because he almost never drives it)
  • Bahorel printed out several hundred pictures of Nic Cage and hid them. Jehan found one in his shoe, Combeferre opened his microwave and saw Nic cage smiling at him from inside, and screamed so loudly Courf thought he was dying. Feuilly found one every time he opened a cabinet or door. The Amis are still finding them in increasingly bizarre placed months afterward
  • Feuilly set Baz’s autocorrect to an eggplant emoji. Every single word was autocorrected to an eggplant. What even is Feuilly
  • Musichetta bought Joly and Bousset donut that were filled with mayonnaise
  • Grantaire and Combeferre filled Enjolras’s computer keyboard with seeds a few days before, and Enj was greeted at work by several dozen plants growing in his keyboard
  • Joly filled Courf’s car with packing peanuts
  • Cosette and Eponine hired a Mariachi band to walk behind Marius for the entire day
  • Marius and Jehan changed the language settings on everyone’s phones, computers, and TV’s
  • Enjolras filled Grantaire’s hair dryer with baby powder, and then forgot about it when he went to dry his hair. He was not amused, but Grantaire definitely was

that autism feel when you have short hair because its so much easier to deal with sensory wise but frequent haircuts are Complete Sensory Hell (the water, products, hair dryers, baby powder, cloth around your neck, little tiny hairs EVERYWHERE OMG) and that makes it really hard to tell the haircutter what you want so you either have to bring someone to explain for you or deal with bad haircuts, and you cant stim because you have to hold still. just, haircuts :(

Gotcha

Requested by Anon

Prompt: Can I request a Clint x Reader where Clint and reader get in a prank war and the reader ends up getting hurt and Clint feels really bad. All the while neither know that they like each other, so Clint tell the reader that’s why he was so worried about her after she got hurt

Warnings: Use of adult language, mention of extremely brief nudity

AN: As with all my Clint x Readers….we’re pretending Laura never existed here


“So this is the new recruit?” Clint asked as he looked over your file with a chuckle. “A raver chick with some tricked out poi balls?” He added as he dropped the file on the table.

“Says the archer with some tricked out arrows.” You quipped back feeling just a little insulted, if anyone could relate to you you’d think it would be him, afterall, you both came from a circus back ground…just you used fabric chains and metal balls and blades and he used a bow and arrow…not too far off really. “And really the poi is just for performance…The rope dart and meteor hammer and the kung fu training that came with them are the parts people tend to worry about.” You added as you let the ball to your meteor hammer hit the floor, splintering the wood under your feet.

“Hey, Coulson and Fury both recommended we take her on, let’s at least see what she can do.” Steve whispered as you began your demonstration. It was hard to tell where the dance and acrobatic skills ended and where your fighting skills began. But it was clear you were well trained in soft weapon combat and you moved with your meteor hammer like it was your best friend. The fire emitting rope dart really got Steve’s attention, seeing how useful that could be. But what got Clint’s attention was your grace and beauty…just too bad about that attitude…it rivaled his own far too much.

~ ~ ~ ~

The morning was dragging on in the Avengers tower. It had only been a week since you showed up and when you weren’t training or fighting you found yourself incredibly bored. But boredom could be easily taken care of, the real problem you found living here was there were no snacks you liked to call just your own…Thor ate all the pop tarts, Tony went through all the blueberries…And Clint would plow through the entire bag of oreos in a sitting! Of course that wouldn’t have been a problem if he didn’t put the empty oreo container back in the cupboard when he was done. But he did, which had gotten your hopes up somewhere around midnight for some milk and cookies…finding a grocery store open at midnight in New York was much harder than you thought.

Earlier in the day the rest of the Avengers had left for a mission. You really were fine staying behind, you understood not every situation called for every member of the team, especially one skilled in soft weapons…Tony and Bruce had stayed behind as well, so it wasn’t like you were totally alone. Only, those two were off doing their science bros thing in the lab on the top floors leaving you to your own devices in the common areas. The only thing that made staying behind so annoying for you was the remark Clint had made on their way out; “Don’t worry (Y/N), next time we throw a rave you’ll be the first we call.” He really had some nerve making fun of your weapons specialty…Robin Hood wannabe! So you sat in the kitchen drinking some coffee as you waited for either those two to come out or for the rest of the team to come home. As you sat contemplating the aggravation Clint has caused you over the past 24 hours the perfect idea came into your head.

You abandoned your mug and ran off to the bathroom at speeds you weren’t aware you could run as you grabbed the toothpaste and returned to the kitchen to get out the oreos. You scraped out the creme into the trash and replaced it with some toothpaste before returning everything where you found it. You giggled to yourself for a while, sipping on your coffee once more to keep yourself from laughing.

“Hey Clint, I got some more oreos.” You called out in a sugary sweet tone, wanting him to think you had done him a favor while he was out.

“Awesome! Thanks (Y/N), you’re the best!” He bounded over to the cupboard excited for his treat. You watched, hiding your smile behind your mug as he bit into the horrible mix of texture and flavors. His smile faded into a look of pure disgust as he spat the minty goop and cookie into the trash. “You are a fuckng monster!” He snapped as you laughed. “Who messes with oreos!”

“Who puts an empty pack back into the cupboard.” You replied, unable to shake the smile caused by the foul look on Clint’s face as he grumbled a vow to get you back for this.

The next day Clint sat at the kitchen table, foot up, relaxing as he flipped through a magazine, a plate of oreos and a nice tall glass of milk sitting in front of him. You eyeballed him suspiciously as you began your daily hunt for a snack. “I picked up some new oreos this morning because you butchered the last of them.” He said flatly as his eyes followed you around the kitchen.

“Nice try…Not buying it.” You quipped before pulling a box of chips ahoy cookies out of the cupboard instead. You let your finger slide under the cardboard, enjoying the safety of being the one to break the seal on the box. “I’ll have these instead.” You stuck your tongue out to him while you poured yourself a nice tall glass of milk.

“Suit yourself.” He muttered with a grin a mile wide, going back to flipping through pages, not really bothering to read anything there. You couldn’t help thinking he’d be almost cute if it wasn’t for how horribly annoying he could be. You so much wanted to eat those cookies, but he had sworn to get you back, and he was acting pretty suspicious.

“Ok…what did you do?” You demanded as you set the glass down on the counter, twirling to face him.

“Wha-…I didn’t do anything! You’re paranoid!” He paused as he got up, drinking from his glass of milk before walking over to you, moving in so close you could feel his breath on your face as his strong arm moved past you and snatched one of your cookies off your plate and shoved it into his mouth. “See?” Crumbs flew from his mouth pelting you in the face before he walked off. You took  a moment to calm yourself from the encounter before finally taking a bite of your chocolate chip cookies and a sip of milk, only to spit it all back out with a cry of disgust. Corn starch mixed with water looks way too much like milk! At the sound Clint jumped from around the corner of the door. “Boom!” He exclaimed while crossing his arms at his crotch.

Of course that just meant war. It went on for months. The both of you spent all of your free time thinking about each other and how to top the latest prank. You’d change the language setting on his phone and he’d program your autocorrect to replace common words with curse words. He’d seran wrap your door so you seran wrapped his toilet seat. You covered his car in sticky brightly colored notes in a pattern so they’d read “The raver was here.” so he loaded your hair dryer with baby powder. As time went on it went from revenge on one another over a petty remark or a careless act and became all in good fun, and you each came to expect something to happen…it kept you both on your toes, especially around each other.

~ ~ ~ ~

“(Y/N), what are you doing?” You heard Natasha’s smooth voice ask as you unscrewed Clint’s shower head.

“Have you ever dyed your hair with kool aid?” You chuckled at the idea of a purple Hawkeye as you filled the fixture with the purple powder of grape kool-aid mix.

“Hoping Clint will run out naked eh?” She teased causing you to pause in your work just long enough for her to see you blushing at the comment.

“No…It’s what he gets for putting baby powder in my hair dryer, that’s all.” You insisted as you finished screwing the shower back together. “I’m not even going to be here to enjoy this one… I’m fire dancing with my poi for a charity event tonight.” Even though you had been with the Avengers for some time now you still loved performing, and charity seemed like the best time for that.

Nat just laughed, she’d been watching the two of you torture each other and she knew you both well enough to know either of you would only put this much effort into what you were doing if you liked one another. “You want me to record it for you?” She half teased.

“Oh you are the best!” You just about pounced on Nat with a hug and a kiss on her cheek. You couldn’t wait to see

“Oh hell no! I’m gonna kill her!” Nat held her hand over her mouth trying not to laugh at the purple tone Clint’s skin and hair has taken as he ran out of his room in a towel, holding her phone up to record the experience for you to enjoy when you got home.

Clint looked up hearing the stifled laughter. “Oh Nat no! You were in on this?” His face sunk into disappointment as he discovered his best friend has betrayed him.

She shook her head as she ended the recording. “Just recording.” She promised as she pocketed the phone. “Purple suits you though.”

“Where is she?!” He demanded as he adjusted his grip on the towel. “She’s at a benefit.” She answered as she turned to retreat to her room. “She’ll be gone just about all night, so you have plenty of time.” She paused, turning back to her friend. “You two should really just kiss or sleep together or something…get it over with. These pranks are starting to get a little out of hand.”

Later that night you came home from your benefit, sweaty and tired, your poi safely tucked away in a bag in your hand. You wore a smile of a day well spent, you couldn’t wait to see the video Nat took and you couldn’t help wondering if Clint was still purple. Oh well, those things would have to wait until morning. It was far too late to bother anyone, besides, all you wanted to do was go to bed. “Oh come on.” You wined as you opened the door to find that Clint had duct taped all your belongings to the ceiling. You looked over the situation, you had to appreciate the work Clint put into this one…probably took him all night. “If you did all this then you must still be purple.” You said to yourself as you began to try to pull your bed down, a task you should not have done alone. You gave out a loud yelp as the duct tape gave in and your bed came toppling down on you.

Clint did indeed work all night still purple on his latest prank, he’d only just gotten done in the shower when he heard your yelp and the loud clatter of the heavy furniture falling around you. His eyes went wide realizing what that sound was. He grabbed a pair of pants, pulling them on as he ran down the hall. “Oh no! (Y/N)!” He cried before rushing to lift the bed off of your leg, seeing that the weight and force of the bed landing on your right leg and foot pretty mangled.

“You purple asshole!” You screamed out in pain as he lifted you up, holding you close to him. Despite Clint’s best efforts in the shower he did infact still have a bit of a purple tint to his hair.

“Yeah, yeah…I know, I’m a dick. Now come on, let’s go wake up Dr. Cho.” The joy of a prank well executed on Clint’s face has been replaced with worry as he carried you bridal style, holding you close as if to protect you from any more harm. “You should have come to get me. I’d have helped you get everything down.” You looked up to him as he used his foot to hit the elevator buttons, taking in the wrinkles of his worried face.

“You put a lot of work into that one.” You chuckled resting your head on his bare chest, exhausted from your long night.

~ ~ ~ ~

You had been in the infirmary all night, but despite the lack of sleep clint refused to leave your side, even after Dr. Cho assured him that it was only a few broken bones and you would live. You could see a look in Clint’s eyes that you hadn’t seen before, you could tell he was genuinely worried about your wellbeing and remorseful he let this pranking go this far. His strong hands wrapped around yours as his sweet as pie smile wrapped around your heart, forcing you to confront feelings for him that you refused to acknowledge.

“(Y/N)…I’m sorry I let things go this far…I never wanted to see you get hurt.” He said for about the 100th time in the last few hours. He spoke softly as he watched you rest on the bed, remembering the beauty of your weapons demo when you first came to the tower on SHEILD’s request. The light of the rising sun through the windows bounced off his baby blue eyes, making them almost shine as he watched over you.

“Dude, I’ve forgiven you about 100 times tonight. Can you please just shut up and go to bed so I can get some sleep?” The teasing tone in your voice and the fact that you have refused to let go of his hand was enough to let him know you really didn’t want that, you wanted him to stay, to comfort you.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that if something serious were to happen to you I don’t know what I would do with myself.” He explained as his free hand brushed a strand of hair off your face.

“You’d find someone else to torment I’m sure.” You teased with a grin as you looked up into his perfect eyes.

“I’m serious (Y/N)…I’m done with the pranks. It’s gone far enough.” He paused looking down into your eyes as his free hand balled into a fist. “You…you drive me crazy. I’m never not thinking about you. I close my eyes and I see your face.” His brow was ruffled, creating those creases through his forehead that you found oddly adorable as his fist slowly moved up and down with each point he made. “You make me just want to…” He trailed off into the least intimidating gorwel you’ve ever heard before rushing his lips into yours, his fingers gripping your hair just a bit as his lips danced across yours letting out all the frustration that’s been built up over the past few months.

~ ~ ~ ~

Two Months Later

Clint woke to find a small nerf bow and arrow set sitting by his nightstand and a note that read “Hey baby, Dr. Cho took my cast off last night, and Bucky has been teaching me how to shoot. Good luck. Love you!” He chuckled as he read it before arming himself with the toy. The second he stepped out of his bedroom a small foam dart hit him in the temple.

“HA! Gotcha!” You shouted before sprinting away.

He looked over in the direction it came from to see you running around a corner, the sweet sound of your laughter echoing through the hallways.

“Oh it’s on!” He shouted after you as he ran down the hall to catch you.