drunkennes

Cashton + Oli Sykes = Big Heart Eyes Motherfucker 😍😍😍

thanks kerrang! mag

Untitled (because I’m a mess)

Request: Yo, here me out. A soulmate au with either Laf or Herc, and they either have the place they meet tattooed on them somewhere or the first thing they say to each other tattooed somewhere.

Pairing: Hercules Mulligan/Reader

Word count: 700+

Modern AU (i always do modern au i’m a mess)

Warnings: Drunkennes, really lowkey daddy kink (hella lowkey this is not smut at all), swearing and I think that’s it.

A/N: I feel like my soulmates au are always really lame, but here you go anon. I think more people got this request, I read one with Lafayette but maybe there’s more, i’m sorry if this is in any way familiar. Also, if you wanna make me really really happy, leave a comment or a review. Love y’all and I hope you enjoy it! (Y/R/N stands for your roommate name, but i chose the name of their girlfriend idek why)

“Come on Y/N, it’s been so long since we last went partying.”

Your roommate Y/R/N has been trying to get you out to the apartment for days, but you are so busy lately the last thing you want to do is go clubbing, although you know you need a distraction. You also need good grades, so you give her a death stare from behind the book you are reading for one of the 500 essays you need to do.

“I really need to finish this.” You try to focus on reading again, but she takes it away from you.

“Come on.” Y/R/N says with a pout. “I’ll let you use my history notes if you come with me tonight.”

Now that is convincing, and she knows it. Your friend has the best notes, and with them you will get a good grade for sure. It’s a really good deal. 

“Okay, but two drinks and we come back.”

 Just because of the smile she gives you, you are glad you accepted.


It’s 11 pm and you are entering the club, but you feel kinda out of place. Alexia, your roommate’s soul mate, has joined and, even if you wouldn’t say it, you feel uncomfortable. Usually, you don’t care about all the soul mate stuff, you are of the opinion that it’ll come when it has to, but being with happy couples always leave you feeling a little sad. Sure, you are still young, but so many of your friends are in happy relationships already and you are still as alone as always.

Without even realizing, you check the words tattooed on your wrist “It’s difficult to be a single dad, especially when your kids are a bunch of drunks” and you can’t help but wonder who will say them and when, and if they really have kids (which kinda scares you) of it’s just some kind of joke.

With all of this thoughts in your head, you order the first one, and soon enough you have forgotten your promise of only two drinks, and, after numerous ones and some shots, you are in the dance floor giving all you’ve got.

After a while, when you start to feel tired, you go back to the bar to order the last one. You can’t help but notice a guy that is sitting next to you, because he’s really cute. Tall, dark-skinned and with the biggest smile you’ve ever seen. It takes him a while to realize that you are looking at him, because he’s watching three guys that are dancing really awkwardly, but when he notices you, his smile gets even bigger.

“It’s difficult to be a single dad, especially when your kids are a bunch of drunks.” He jokes, and the words sound so oddly familiar, but the alcohol on your organism keeps you from actually understanding what he just said.

“They all have your eyes, but you are certainly cuter.” You follow the joke, but his eyes widen in shock after your words.

“You…you are my soulmate.” He whispers, showing you the words in his wrist, and you understand him perfectly even with the loud music.

“Oh.” You answer, feeling really awkward, until something clicks in your brain. “I think you are mine too, yeah.”

You hug immediately, still in shock, but really happy.

“I’m Y/N.”

“And I’m Hercules Mulligan”

“Well, I know you’ve got 3 kids, but tonight you can be my daddy too.” You say playfully, the alcohol half talking for you, but he keeps you apart after a quick kiss, laughing.

“As good as that sounds, I’d rather wait until you aren’t drunk. ¿Coffee tomorrow? I feel like you will need it.”

You complain a little, but finally agree to meet the next day, only after he saves your number and promise to call your first thing in the morning.

Later on the taxi, Y/R/N and her girlfriend can’t believe what happened to you.

“Sit your drunk ass down, there is no way that happened.” Alexia jokes, mocking you, but they have to shut up when you get a text from Hercules asking if you arrived safe.

“Well,” Y/R/N says after being in silence for a while “This proves you should always listen to me.”

Untranslatable Norwegian #1

Fyllenerver (or as we say up north, “Fyillenærva”):
When you wake up after a night of drinking and your immediate thought is “oh my god, what the hell did I do last night”, “oh my god, I have no memory at all” or the best “oh my god, who the hell is that?””Being hungover” doesn’t cut it. We got a word for that too, “fyllesyk”. But “fyllenerver” is different. “Anxiety caused by heavy drinking” doesn’t sound cool enough haha

anonymous asked:

Can you please do the reason why they would cheat on you but with ZICO, Jay & Gray? 💕

Zico
physical distance, loneliness, drunkennes,
If he’s in a relationship for a long time and another girl seduces him, he might get temped or if he has a big fight with his gf.

Jay Park
He seems like a womanizer but i honestly think he wouldn’t cheat on his gf once he commits into a relationship. He seems to be a very loyal person. I do think he plays around a lot with girls, but not if he’s in a relationship.

Gray
He also seems like a loyal person and boyfriend. So he must be very intoxicated if he ever does cheat on his gf.

The first is ape drunke; and he leapes, and singes, and hollowes, and danceth for the heavens;

The second is lion drunke; and he flings the pots about the house, calls his hostesse whore, breakes the glasse windowes with his dagger, and is apt to quarrell with anie man that speaks to him;

The third is swine drunke; heavie, lumpish, and sleepie, and cries for a little more drinke, and a fewe more cloathes;

The fourth is sheepe drunk; wise in his conceipt, when he cannot bring foorth a right word;

The fifth is mawdlen drunke; when a fellowe will weepe for kindnes in the midst of ale, and kisse you, saying, “By God, captaine, I love thee. Goe thy wayes; thou dost not thinke so often of me as I doo thee; I would (if it pleased God) I could not love thee as well as I doo;” and then he puts his finger in his eye, and cryes;

The sixt is Martin drunke; when a man is drunke, and drinkes himselfe sober ere he stirre;

The seventh is goate drunke; when, in his drunkennes, he hath no minde but on lecherie;

The eighth is fox drunke—when he is craftie drunke, as manie of the Dutchmen bee, that will never bargaine but when they are drunke.

—  The Eight Kindes of Drunkennes

Written by Thomas Nashe, “Pierce Pennilesse” 1592
So. I heard an amusing story in my creative writing class yesterday.

So. I heard an amusing story in my creative writing class yesterday. I have decided to write it up in my own words for you today. This is pieced together from two different people, one who saw the event and the other who witnessed the aftermath.  J

There was a guy, perhaps middle-aged with friends… rather drunk. It was in the middle of the afternoon, not far from the local pubs and bars. And for whatever reason, this man decided that it would be a good idea to try and climb the tree. So up he went, precariously attempting this feat and at first, it seemed to be going okay… until a resounding crack shivered through the tree and the man fell to the ground like a plank of wood… his head hitting the solid pavement below with a loud thump. Soon, an ambulance was called and they arrived along with police, who drove up beside the man and carried him onto one of those wheelie beds…

The next minute, the man was up, smacking the ambulance woman squarely in the face before hurtling away, pushing past a group of people… his white top stained red with thick blood. It is only when the man has gone past, that the onlookers see the flap of skin hanging from the back of his head, the blood covering the back of his shirt and coming out in rhythmic gushes from his head. Soon, the police men were after him once more, and as the man tried to stumble away around the corner and down the steps, he was grabbed by the policemen, who soon get drenched in blood, to try and take him back to the bed and onto the ambulance.

The poor police people. All they wanted to do was help, and that’s what they got in return.  Drunk people. So inconvenient. But they make such interesting stories.