drunken lady

She was a hard sign: Scorpio. Since she was born in November. She loved…In advance she loved the man she’d one day love. And if she wanted she could allow herself the luxury of becoming even more sensitive, she could go further still.
—  Clarice Lispector, from The Collected Stories; “Daydream and Drunkenness of a Young Lady,

Oh, speaking of the Dead Ladies Club, I know that term is generally reserved for the mothers of the main actors in current ASOIAF (and a few other Robert’s Rebellion-era female characters). But I’d like to honorarily include one more – Dyanna Dayne, mother of Aegon V Targaryen and Master Aemon and others, wife of Maekar Targaryen. Wrong generation, for sure, but Aegon is one of the main characters in the Dunk and Egg stories (and his brothers are important in the stories and very probably his sisters eventually), Aemon is a major character in ASOIAF, and this is all we know about their mother:

“You’re going to Ashford, aren’t you? Take me with you, ser.”
The innkeep had warned him of this. “And what might your mother say to that?”
“My mother?” The boy wrinkled up his face. “My mother’s dead, she wouldn’t say anything.”
He was surprised. Wasn’t the innkeep his mother? Perhaps he was only ’prenticed to her.

–The Hedge Knight

And again, we only found out her name in 2014, in the Targaryen family tree in The World of Ice and Fire. Dyanna of House Dayne of Dorne, married Prince Maekar of House Targaryen in ???, had four sons and two daughters, and died ??? some time before 209 AC, many years before Maekar became king in 221 AC. That’s it, we know nothing else.

Was Dyanna close to Queen Mariah Martell, her mother-in-law? What about her sister-in-law, Jena Dondarrion, considering Dondarrions are traditional enemies of Dorne? While she might have been pleased to marry a prince, what did she think about marrying a fourth son? What did she think of the First Blackfyre Rebellion, considering Daemon’s supporters were so against the supposed Dornish influence on the royal court? Did she know about her son Daeron’s dreams and her son Aerion’s madness, what did she think of them? How did she die? What did her sons and daughters think of her? Did they ever think of her, so many years later, when Aegon the Unlikely had become king of Westeros, when Aemon became a maester and then joined the Night’s Watch, when her daughters married and had children of their own? We just don’t know.

anonymous asked:

Jaime believes that Ned loved Robert more than his father and brother Brandon, even Catelyn. Do you think this is true?

No, I don’t. Here’s the line, with a bit of context.

[”]I think Ned Stark loved Robert better than he ever loved his brother or his father… or even you, my lady. He was never unfaithful to Robert, was he?” Jaime gave a drunken laugh. “Come, Lady Stark, don’t you find this all terribly amusing?”

- Catelyn VII, ACoK

First, Jaime’s trashed and trying to be cruel to Catelyn. While I don’t doubt Jaime believes this or something like this, he’s also putting the most negative spin on it that he can manage.

Second, and more importantly, Jaime says this in utter ignorance of Ned’s past decisions. Specifically, the decisions Ned made about Jon Snow, which contra Jaime’s words here, mean that Ned was never unfaithful to Catelyn - and did betray his friendship with Robert. Jaime’s struck a rich vein of irony here.

As for whether Ned loved Robert more than his father and his brother, well. We don’t know much about Ned’s relationship with his dad, only that his relationship with Jon Arryn was at least as strong. As for Ned’s relationship with Brandon, let’s just say he didn’t break tradition to put a statue of him in the Stark crypt because of any lukewarm affections.

Sometimes I just wanna grab mi/arren believers by the shoulders and shake some sense into them. With all the bullshit being doled out in the world, you’d think they’d question things, ask questions? I don’t normally dwell too much on what’s blatantly obvious, but sometimes stupidity needs to be called out.

1. The real bf posts about being at an Elvis Honeymoon getaway in Palm Springs.

2. Lu/Lu posts a video of a new “friend” and tags her IG account, which at the time, is private.

3. 4 hours later, that IG account is suddenly open and a staged mi/arren photo happens to be on her IG story. What are the odds? ->insert sarcasm here<- Daisy deserves an Oscar and a bottle of vodka for that performance.

4. After dinner, the drunken ladies and one Daisy head to a club, where as per usual, beardie gets shit faced. Daisy is seen on his phone (likely texting his real bf HELLLLLLP MEEEE). Then the *soulmates* are seen fighting on the dance floor up until beardie sees the camera on them and goes it for an alleged kiss, but most likely it was her whispering in his ear “asshole! - she’s filming us so act happy!”

5. On the car ride home, beardie is wasted in the backseat while her beloved of many moons sits in the front seat, as yanno, a good loving partner would do.      ->insert sarcasm here<-

6. Daisy heads to gay bar (unsure but irrelevant if the drunken posse went along) and compliments a gay man on his Britney t-shirt.

7. Meanwhile, beardie’s bff Z/oe is in a hospital (per her IG story) while beardie parties it up in PS. Friendship goals? ->insert sarcasm here<-

Beardie has got to be one of the most self absorbed, spoiled, insincere, vindictive people on the planet and she has her talons into Daisy and won’t let go. We cannot all be his guardians and protect this adult man, he is in this, he’s partially responsible. We cannot know all the reasons behind it, we don’t know who/what/why/how and when it will end. It could end horribly with Daisy being outed (sadly a likely scenario given his public cries for help), or there can be a plan in place. All we can do is sit on the sidelines and hope for the best and wait for the runaway train to reach its final destination and have faith that Daisy makes it out in one piece.

That's My Girl - Cheryl Blossom x Female Reader

Warnings:Swearing, alcohol mentions, unwanted advances.
A/N;sorry this is so short & terrible, i’ve been trying not to die all day feeling like crap, hope you enough this anyway!

‘You should smile more, little lady,’ the drunken boy slurred at you. You forced a little grin, hoping against all hope that he would leave you alone. As if you hadn’t been uncomfortable enough, sitting in a loud bar while you waited on your girl to return with your drink, god had decided to send a fuckboy your way. Too polite - and, admittedly, a little too scared - to push him away, you endured the cheesy pick-up lines, the overwhelming smell of lager on his breath as he slowly leaned in closer to you.

Just then, a saviour appeared in the form of a short, slender girl with fiery red curls that bounced with every movement. A pale hand slammed itself down in front of you, Cheryl Blossom angling her body so the creep couldn’t see you anymore. She flashed her trademark sinister smile, lips the colour of blood, startling against her pale skin.

‘Hi! I’m Cheryl. (Y/N)’s girlfriend.’ The last word is emphasised, sharp as a spear and spoken dangerously soft. The boy smirks; 'So, a little bit of girl-on-girl action, huh? I’m into it.’

Cheryl closed her eyes and took a breath, flicking her curls over her shoulder. The action caused a wave of air to pass by you, the scent of of her flowery perfume tickling your nose. You smiled at the familiarity of the scent.

'Well, unfortunately for you, we-’ she motioned between you both with a wave of her hand - 'are not interested in smelly hobos who cannot take no for an answer. Now, be a good little boy, and run away.’ She bared her teeth in another dangerous smile. Taken aback by the ferocity of her words, the boy stumbled back, a little alarmed. Muttering something indecipherable, he finally left. Cheryl rolled her eyes, turning to you and leaning down to capture your lips in a possessive kiss. You smiled into it, the sweet taste of Maple Red lingering on your tongue as she pulled away, tangling her hands in your hair. 'People should know not to touch, or even look at, what’s mine,’ she whispered, eyes darkening. You leaned in again, happy to just have your girl by your side, no fuckboys in sight.

Don’t Thank Me (Bad Boy!Calum blurb)

Bad boy!Calum who always hangs out at the local pub and gets kicked out for fighting all the time, and truthfully the only reason he hasn’t been banned is because his uncle owns the place. He challenges people to a game a pool and hustles them out of their money, and then he uses that money to pay for drinks for the hottest girl he can find that night. Every girl drools over him, and no matter who he goes up to they are always eager to go home with him, wanting to test out the validity of his reputation in bed. One night, he’s in the middle of a game and he glances up to the door when he hears a cute giggle sound through the bar and he locks eyes with you and he loses concentration on the game at hand, and sweat collects against his palms. One of the friends you have with you lean over and whisper to you and point at him, and you raise an eyebrow, tilting your head slightly as you rake your eyes over his body and he shakes the thoughts out of his head to get back to the game because he simply cannot lose if you’re watching him. You sit at the bar, eating and drinking with your friends, and Calum keeps an eye on you for the whole night but he never could gather the courage to go up to you.

It takes Calum seeing you there two more times for him to realize that you and the same two friends come there every Friday night, so he works it into his schedule that he’s always there on Friday nights too, just to be able to watch you from afar because he still hasn’t spoken a word to you. One Friday night, a gross old guy in his mid-50’s sends a drink for you to the table that you and your friends had been sitting at, and you politely declined but the man didn’t like that so he decided to deliver it a second time himself. He tapped your shoulder, and you turned and grimaced when you saw the face that the waitress has just pointed out to you as the man that had ordered you the margarita, and he asked if you wanted to join him at his table. You declined, turning to look at your friends again when he grabbed your shoulder and turned your body to look at him again. It was record time that Calum crossed the room and laid the man flat on his ass with a strike across his jaw spitting out at the gross drunken man, “the lady said no, leave her the fuck alone you prick.” Calum stood and watched as the man was taken out by security, and then he turned to walk out the back door onto the smoking patio that was out there, and he didn’t notice that you had gotten up and followed after him until you touched his arm just as he brought them to rest up on the railing of the patio. He turned his head, and his heart leaped into his throat when he saw that it was you.

“Hi,” you muttered, smiling at him.

“Hey,” he blinked heavily, looking down at where your hand was still resting on his arm and you quickly retracted it.

“Um, thank you, for that,” you were looking at your shoes, kicking away a small rock that lay on the floor.

“Don’t thank me,” he said bluntly, regretting the way it came out immediately as your eyes shot back up to catch his, widened slightly. “Just, you shouldn’t have to thank me. You shouldn’t have to fucking experience shit like that. That’s fucking bullshit.”

“I’m Y/N,” you stated with a smile, reaching your hand out waiting for him to put his in yours so you could shake it.

“Calum,” he smiled, a light blush dancing across his brown skin.

“Would you like to go grab some food, and get to know each other outside of what we see as we stare at each other secretly from across a dingy pub every Friday night?,” you joke, laughing at yourself and smiling bigger when you hear him laughing too.

“I would love that, actually,” he agreed, turning and extending an arm for you to loop yours through.

Walking past your friends was comical, their mouths hanging open in shock as you strutted past them and dropped a wink in their direction. They, along with every other person who was staring at you, felt a small ache in their chest for you because it would only be a one night stand. It would only ever be a one night stand when it came to Calum.

And that may have been true in the past, but not anymore. Not with you.

The secret [to success] is… are you capable of understanding what went wrong and why it went wrong. That’s the real key.
—  Some drunk asshole youtuber called Markiplier
Forever with the Devil (Chapter 5)

(Chapter 1 link here)

(Chapter 4 link here)

„Good morning, detective.“, Lucifer smiled and Chloe turned around, her mouth wide open in surprise as she stared at him.

„What the-“, she stopped herself, shaking her head in disbelief. „You were gone for almost three weeks! I get no explanation from you whatsoever after what had happened that night…“

She looked around, trying to see if anyone was listening and then continued. „…And now you just show up here and pretend like nothing’s wrong!“

„Yes, well, what would you like me to do?“ he asked, one of his usual cocky smiles still on his face.

„Explain yourself.“, she folded her arms beneath her chest angrily.

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War Creatures (Ch.17)

Pairing: Loki X Reader

Summary:  In a crossover of the Nine Realms and Westeros, you find yourself in the dawn of a rebellion. Odin, Lord of Pyke, has made alliances with your family, House Grover of Highgarden. Your father’s army will join Odin’s army to overthrow the King and take the Iron Throne. There is just one cost to this alliance.You must marry the dark, young prince Loki.In a world where Kings do as they wish, where war is an oncoming storm, and peace is nothing but a dream, you are lost but brave. Loki is more powerful than he seems, and love will grow from the flames of war.

Words: 2416

Taglist: @white-chocolate-mocha-fan

Read on Ao3: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11108748/chapters/29052837

“Within A fortnight!” shouted Lord Wilfig across the dining hall. “My son and his new bride shall be joined in marriage! Ah, sweet, young love.” He looked at us. Walder’ grin had a piece of meat stuck in it, and I politely tried to smile. Fandral cringed at my facial reaction, and tried to lighten the mood for the both of us.

“Think of it this way,” he began. “Less than two weeks till they’re all gone.” He was right. Loki’s plan had put Fandral and me at the frontlines. Each day passed and we grew more and more annoyed with the drunken dwarves.

The Lord Mother, Lady Wewatta, planned every detail of the wedding, down to the seating arrangements. I was a part of these plans as much as a baker was a part of a naval army. Not to say that she was cruel or mean. Lady Wewatta was very excited about her son’s upcoming nuptials, and even more excited that it was to Lady Cerissa, a very pretty, human noble.

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So we Meet Again (Remus x reader)

Summary: You’re a year younger than Remus, and you just graduated from Hogwarts. One day Remus walk into the bar you work at and develops a crush on you.

Originally posted by justkeepchill

You sigh, the scent of alcohol not leaving your nostrils. Just another shift, Y/N you can do this. You hated your job. I mean who wouldn’t? Being around horny drunk guys all time couldn’t make anyone happy. But you needed the money. After you graduated from Hogwarts your mind was set on being an Auror. Little did you know that the Ministry training cost a fortune. So every night, you wound up in the loud bar serving drinks. You checked your appearance in the mirror. Always look good, your boss once told you. Your blouse was unbuttoned at the top, showing a tiny bit of your chest. Your tight black skirt was hugging your hips and stopped in the middle of your thighs. Your hair was in cute dutch braids today and you had no makeup on except for some red lipstick to add a little flair.

You stepped out into the bar area, saying hi to your friend who was wiping glasses.

“Watch out for those two guys in the flannels, they’re pretty wasted.” She whispered to you as she walked out.

“Thanks Y/F/N.”

You tucked a loose strand of hair back and got to work. People came and left, it was a typical night. Until someone came in that made the color rise to your cheeks. Remus Lupin. You had a crush on him in school, but since he was a year older than you, you two never really officially met. Suddenly you felt the heat go up in the room. He was still really really cute, some of the schoolboy charm still there. But he also looked more mature, his muscles a little more toned and you swear he must have gotten taller. You two locked eyes for a brisk moment. Shit. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself.

“Hi how can I help you?” you asked him as he took a seat right in front of you.

“Hi there. Can I have a scotch and water with a twist please?”

“Ah it’s so refreshing having a guy with manners come in here.” You said, grabbing a glass.

He chuckled and you two made small conversation as you prepared his drink. During this whole time, his eyes never left your face.

“So what’s your name?” he asks you some time later.

“Y/N.” you smile, praying to god he doesn’t recognize you from Hogwarts. Sadly he does.

“Oh my god Y/N? I remember you, you were the cutest girl in your year.”

At this, you blush heavily and bit your lip to stop yourself from smiling too widely.

“Still are the cutest girl in your year” he adds.

“Thank you.” You stare into his eyes. Then, some douche of course decides to break your moment.

“OI pretty lady?” a drunken guy in a flannel screams.

“How can I help you?” you answer, hiding your disgust.

“I’m done for the night.” He slurs.

“Alright. Counting all the drink you had, that’ll be 47 galleons.” You say counting all the empty glasses in front of him.

“How much do you cost for the night?” he cackles.

“It’s 47 galleons for the drinks sir.” You say more firmly.

“Oi come on… I can get you out of here and we can have some fun.” He carries on.

“Hey leave her alone! She said 47 for the drinks that’s all. Treat a woman with respect will you?” Remus shouts. The guy in the flannel eyes him angrily but raises his shoulders and puts the money on the counter, as well as twenty silver coins.

“How dare he say that to you.” Remus huffs, still a little angry.

“Eh you get used to it. Plus the horny drunk ones tip a lot.” You smirk, slipping the silver coins in your pocket.

“’M guessing plenty of guys hit on you?” he questions.

“Well yeah I think I get the worst out of all the bartenders.” you say, wiping the counter clean. It was late and Remus was the only person left.

“Makes sense, you’re the most beautiful.”

“Stop it, you didn’t even see the other bartenders!” you chuckle.

“I don’t need to.” He looks into your eyes. “Hey why don’t you have a drink, it’s on me.”

“Oh alright.”

You two spend the whole night talking and laughing and when the morning comes, your boss wakes up to you asleep on the couch in Remus’ arms. He looks around and the whole place is spotless and clean. He smiles to himself and walks to his office. Y/N was a keeper alright, he thought. And so thought Remus.

Originally posted by welcomethenewage

Allrighty guys thanks for reading! I really likes this plot so send in requests if u want a PART 2? feedback’s always appreciated! xxx

anonymous asked:

Headcanon Claire Temple, Sara Lance, Natasha Romanoff, Kendra, and Elektra on a drunken ladies night out


Elektra becoming the most irresponsible big sister mentor to Thea ever; lots of fun to go on patrols with but probably shamelessly encouraging the bloodlust. (Laurel is, understandably, pissed; she enlists Nyssa to throw down with Elektra.)

Claire and Caitlin meeting for coffee and immediately starting a “Doctors and Nurses Against Superheroes Doing Dumb Shit” club. They call each other on a weekly basis to complain about their idiots in red. (“He’s picking a fight with the entire Japanese mob.” “Mine ran himself into an alternate dimension.” “Jesus Christ. You start.”)

Nat and Sara probably do shots and then have a knife throwing competition because that’s just kind of who they are as people. They get kicked out of the bar and go prowl the streets, raining swift retribution on anyone stupid enough to catcall them.

Mari and Jemma get in a good-natured argument about magic with both of them refusing to budge an inch, while Daisy just swoons over how cool Mari’s power are.

Wanda and Kendra do the kiss  (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧