drunk tilda

anonymous asked:

KYLA who is the older twin andrew or aaron? H E L P

HO BOI You chose a good ass night to ask this beautiful question. Also if you like this feel free to follow my aftg sideblog @daddymemeyard !!

  • No one knows who came first. 
  • Tilda had the twins on the dl
    • like even Luther didn’t know she was pregnant and he’s the Family Man 
    • and she would’ve gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for those meddlesome kids. 
  • When she kept bleeding they had to call her emergency contact, which just so happens to be The Dick
  • But,,,,,she’d already filled out the forms. 
  • Luckily (that feels like the wrong word since nothing is lucky about either one of the boys upbringings) The Dick laid on that trademark christian guilt. 
  • (am I using too many trademarks? Yes! Am I going to stop? Probably not!)
  • anywho,,,,, 
  • fast forward 21 years (21 because 20 years would put us at the end of TKM and we all know how fragile their budding friendship was at the point)
  • These boys (cue Aaron grumbling “I’m a man.”) might not know who is older but that’ll never stop their need to constantly piss the other off as well as the need to one up each other. 
  • And so commences the eternal war of “Shut up little bro” “I’m right because I’m older and wiser” “You’re like 12″ 
    • If you know twins that DONT do this I have to ask,,,,,, Where did you find those magical unicorns??
    • I know F I V E sets of twins and they ALL do this ALL THE TIME
    • It’s a goddamn plague
  • “Andrew what the fuck? I said I wanted banana popscicles.”
    • “Now Aaron if you’re going to be fussy, go take a nap. Big brother’s trying to read.”
    • “Don’t ask what I want if you’re not going to get it you fucking twelve year old.” 
    • “Twelve is still older than two.” 
  • “Where the fuck did you hide my laptop!”
    • “Now Kevin, as the older brother I’ll take responsibility. Andrew hid it.” 
  • “If you’re going to blatantly lie to me you could at least wipe the fucking chocolate off your mouth first.” 
    • “Dear baby bro, sweet summer child, kid, buddy, andrew. No.”