drunk swanson

Drunk Steve who giggles like Ron Swanson. Drunk Steve who gets contrary to the point where Natasha tells him he shouldn’t do things because she wants him to do them and facepalms because she’s a spy, she could have done this manipulation when she was five. She who hates being vined but is such good vine material that when he tries to grab Nat’s phone but just grabs her and hold her over his head like actually does anything. Drunk Clint gets offended that she’s having all the fun and literally climbs Steve to sit on his head but being drunk ends up tangled somewhere around his shoulders. Natasha tries to make it seem like she has an incredibly high alcohol tolerance but she’s so comparatively tiny that she’s basically always barely holding it together and if any of them were actually sober it would be very clear that she’s not. Steve stumbles into Tony and grabs a piece of the iron man suit (of course drunk Tony is in the iron man suit) and just tears it off, then gets rather confused as to why he’s holding this piece of metal, realizes Tony, who’s talking at very high speeds with bruce, hasn’t noticed it fell off because the suit locked up, and tries to like, smush it back into place very subtly, by which I mean not subtly at all. Steve who gets incredibly belligerent and tries to stomp out of the room but because he’s looking back at everyone and arguing he just walks through the wall.