i had a dream that i had a Friend Group over for games and drinks and stuff and right in the middle of talking to this girl (whom my mind fuckin made up) i just sat there for a second blanking bc I was staring at her face and then i was like “i’m sorry you’re just. REALLY pretty” and everyone around me was like sara cmon pull it together
You know what you have to do right?” She purrs, smoke drifting from her curved lips. “You have to choose right now. You can either continue to fuck up any chance of happiness that comes your way and complain when things don’t work,” she levels me with a hard stare and smirks. “Or let it go. And realise that not everyone is going to treat you how he did, try to hope this one could be different and that I won’t have to pour you a drink if he turns out to be like the others.
Excerpt from the book I’ll never write // advice from my alter ego
* You know Bim is going to go all out with this, right? The biggest bouquets of flowers everywhere, beautiful lace trimmed tablecloths at each table at the reception, a big cake that compliments you both. The whole shabang.
* The egos are excited, probably not as much as Bim. He’s absolutely ecstatic and over the moon about this.
* He’ll be taking a good bit of time off from showbiz to pay full attention to this and you. He wants to make sure this day is extremely special and not interrupted by anything.
* Underneath his glowing enthusiasm for it all, he’s an absolute nervous wreck. He’s terrified you’ll leave him at the alter or have second thoughts, but he’s reassured but Wilford and Dr. Iplier that everything will go fine and that you’d never leave him, especially with how in love you two are.
* For your walk down the aisle, Bim most likely got the best violin and piano player for the music to be played. As soon as you two make eye contact, Bim is immediately brought to tears. It all really hits him that you’re both about to really make it official that you two are together forever. And he loves it and he’s so, so, so excited.
* Holding his hands while you’re up there with him you’re going to notice how shaky he is, from excitement and nervousness. Giving his hands a good squeeze will help him calm a bit, and he’ll have the biggest smile on his face.
* Bim’s vows will be heart melting sweet, his promises will be to show his love for you with you and without you, since, well, you are his entire universe and he couldn’t ask for anyone better to deal with himself besides you. You’re special to him, so special. You’re his best friend and closest companion, his ride or die, really (not really, he’s just being a goof). You’re his inspiration and encouragement, just so many sweet things and promises said to you.
* He’ll listen to your vows with undivided attention, hanging onto each word and smiling more and more, on the brink of tears again. Those vows will never leave his head for years and years.
* Now, Bim is a pretty snazzy guy and a big show off, so, with the kiss, he’s going to definitely spin you around before doing one hell of a dramatic dip and kissing you, full of love. He’s not going to leave you alone with how adorable you looked when you got so red.
* The reception is…full out with how you and Bim went about it. Best musicians you could find, best cooks you could find, so on. I can see mainly jazz music playing or a few classical pieces that, well, get interrupted with some drunk egos going up and trying to sing and having to get dragged off stage by others.
* The cake is large and beautifully decorated, you winning against Bim with feeding him since you shove the entire piece of cake in his face, but he can’t help but to laugh and try to kiss you, getting cake on your face as well.
* Wilford will be the main one congratulating you both over and over, being Bim’s close friend in showbiz and all, plus will tell all the embarrassing stories of you two when you first started dating and how easy it was to tell that Bim was lovesick. Other egos like Dr. Iplier and the Host will do the same, the Host even cracking a few jokes about it.
* Your dance with Bim is close and quiet, but full of love as you gaze into each other’s eyes and smile the entire time. Both of you don’t even notice that the music is over until someone comes over, both of you flustered in embarrassment. Who could blame you honestly? You both looked gorgeous dancing together.
* If you throw flowers, Yandereiplier will catch them no doubt and probably chase Mark Bop after with them.
* If you do the whole garter thing, Bim being the sinful man he is, will make a comment that leaves you flustered for a good while along with him being a little risqué with taking the garter off (no worries he doesn’t go too far).
* When you two go to leave, Silver Shepherd accidentally spills champagne over you both instead of the more traditional thing and gets dragged away by Google. You two don’t mind too much though, you were both too happy to notice. Everyone gives their congratulations once again, a few extra gifts and hugs (even from Dark), and then you’re both off to some extravagant honeymoon Bim planned out.
Marriage Life with Bim Includes:
* Lovely mornings with him waking you up gently, murmuring "Good morning” with kisses on your cheek or temple.
* You both have breakfast together before he goes off to his job, but don’t worry, he tends to bring you with for encouragement while he’s live in front of the camera. You keep giving him thumbs up throughout and he’s just ecstatic the entire time, hugging you and spinning you around after almost each time after a show is over, thanking you for being there.
* You help him come up with more questions for his show and so on, and he loves it so much.
* You’re really the only person that gets to see Bim out of the suit and dressy look— him in sweatpants, messy as heck hair, old t-shirts, just. Messy, sleepy Bim. Maybe no glasses either? Help me
* He is either constantly holding you or your hand when you two are alone, or just stealing little glances at you now and then case he loves you so much a h.
* If you want children, Bim will be a good bit nervous because of course he’ll agree since he has imagined your children, but is nervous because of what could possibly go wrong. Nonetheless, he’ll spoil and love that child to no tomorrow. You’ll have to stop him sometimes from buying too much for the kid, but he can’t help it. His universe just got bigger and he loves it so much, especially since he will brag about his child so much at work. If you choose to not have kids or adopt, he’ll be totally fine with it, it’ll take him a while to completely accept not having children, though. Adopting, though, he’ll be the same as when you have a child with him.
* Arguments with Bim get loud and harsh and end quickly with slammed doors. But…Bim can’t handle the words he said to you, and you feel awful for what you said to him. You both end up trying to say an apology at the same time to each other and laugh, hugging and working through whatever it was you argued about.
* Bad days with Bim are when his creativity and exciting personality are at a low, him being slow around the house and quiet. He’ll be thankful for you sitting next to him and listening to him, appreciating you so much more if possible for you being there for him. He feels much better with cuddling with you and watching some silly movies and shows.
* On your bad days, Bim goes all out to assist you and help out with cheering you up. If you want space he’ll respect it and back off, but will say that if you need him at all he’ll show up instantly. He’ll even get Wilford to come over to help cheer you up with them telling stories and such to get you to laugh. More than anything, Bim will be that shoulder to cry on and someone who will attempt to make your favorite food to bring that pretty smile back to your stunning face.
* Marriage life with Bim is sweet and full of energy and happiness, Bim glowing each day with waking up next to you and getting to call you his own. He’ll stay as excited as he was the day of your wedding for years and years and years, he just loves and adores you so so much. He’ll do anything to help you and encourage you with your passions no matter what, loving to see you happy and passionate.
39. I can’t believe no one has spiked the eggnog yet
“I can’t believe no one spiked the eggnog yet.” Anti whined
from where he was sat against the wall of the annual Septic Egos party. Dark
was sitting next to him, leaning back against the wall with a glass of eggnog
on the floor beside him, rolling his eyes as Anti watched the other egos dance
around and throw tinsel at each other. The drinks of the party had been
untouched since the beginning, and Anti had been hankering for someone to spike
“Why don’t you do it yourself?” Dark asked as he took another
sip from his own glass. The grey-skinned ego was tired of the festivities, and
of the suspicious stares being cast over to him and Anti since they weren’t the
most welcome at this sort of events, but he wouldn’t leave until the Glitch
demon wanted to.
“It’s no fun like that!” Anti complained, “I expected at
least Bing and Chase to do it.”
The two aforementioned egos were in the middle of the dancefloor,
apparently ‘dancing’ although there was a lot to be desired in their moves. In
Dark’s opinion, if any of the egos gathered tonight were likely to spike the
eggnog, he would have guessed either Bing or Chase, but clearly, they were
feeling well behaved. Schneeplestein and Dr Iplier had been manning the drinks
table for the majority of the night anyway, giving anyone barely any
opportunity anyway. They were focused on Anti, expecting something from him.
“Are you not enjoying yourself?” Dark asked.
“I never enjoy these sorts of things.” Anti shrugged, “I don’t
know why they ever invite me.”
“Family spirit.” Dark suggested, “Or the spirit of Christmas?
Who knows, you should be glad they include your crazy ass.”
“I didn’t realise eggnog made you so loose tongued,” Anti
laughed, “Or are you just super relaxed?”
Dark shrugged. “I don’t get the chance to do this sort of
thing very often after all.”
Silence fell between them as the Christmas songs dragged on
and the party slowly dwindled down until the majority of the Septic egos were
lying on the floor, exhausted and full of food. Dark was dozing by the time the
party was truly over, head resting on Anti’s shoulder and Anti was whining
about how dead the party was.
“If Warfstache was here, it would’ve been better.” He tutted.
“Someone would have gotten stabbed, or shot.” Dark whispered,
scaring Anti as he hadn’t expected the other ego to be awake.
“That’s where the fun comes into it.” Anti grinned, “When the
blood is spilt.”
“Before you were happy enough for the fun to come from the
egos getting drunk.” Dark mumbled, “Are you sure the eggnog wasn’t spiked?”
Anti nodded, “Pretty sure, why?”
“Too much alcohol makes Dark incredibly sleepy, until it
really kicks in.” Dr Iplier announced, scaring Anti again as he wandered past
them with a tired Schneeplestein in tow. “And eggnog is not that alcoholic
There had been no other sign that the eggnog had been spiked,
but when Anti grabbed Dark’s mostly empty glass and sniffed it, he could smell
a strong spirit mixed in with the milky liquid. So, someone had spiked the
eggnog! Why wasn’t it effecting anyone else then, only Dark? He hadn’t seen the
other Septic egos drunk before, but he had seen them sober, and none of them
were acting any different.
Unless it was only Dark who had been spiked.
None of the egos here were brave enough to do that except Anti
himself, and he hadn’t. So, who had spiked the suited ego?
He didn’t have time to think about it as Dark shot up and
grabbed Anti’s wrist, pulling him forward into a sharp kiss. Anti squeaked in
surprise as Dark pulled him fully into his lap, hands already low on his waist
and teeth at Anti’s neck.
“Has anyone ever told you that you look beautiful bathed in Christmas
lights?” Dark murmured against Anti’s skin, sending shivers through him. Glancing
behind him to where the other egos were lying on the floor, oblivious to drunk
Dark’s attempts to undress Anti, he couldn’t help but let a sly grin cross his
He let Dark’s hands wander, and thanked whoever had spiked
the eggnog that it had actually happened, even if it was only Dark that seemed
to be effected.
Jameson and Shawn sitting on the floor in the kitchen rambling and giggly and drunk. One of the egos checks in on them the next morning and Dan's head is against Shawn's shoulder and Shawn has a limp protective are around him. Its not clear if they were like that before or during sleep.. -o.t.b
Hi i just wanted you to know that your drunk egos this is damn funny xD i was wondering if you can do that but with the ipliers and selticees see what they do. I bet Jameson (thats dappers nane right?) And wilfird will be dancing xD
Just a curious question but how would Robbie react if he encountered an angry drunk? (If he was by himself.) I know it wouldn't happen but i'm just really curious
I think he’d be really scared because Robbie does not handle angry people very well and almost always goes nonverbal around them, so I think he’d try and find someone that could help the angry drunk (probably one of the egos) and let them take care of it. He’d feel bad for not being able to help more, but then he’d be reassured that what he did was very responsible and they’re proud of him for doing what he did, and that’d make him feel better!
[The following morning I wake up to my head using his bicep as a pillow, and his nose still dangerously close to mine.
Shit shit shit.
I climb out the bed and wince as he begins to shuffle, hoping he won’t wake up. I watch him, frozen on the spot, as he turns over and places his hands under the pillow, cuddling his face into it. I have to admit, he looks pretty adorable. I blush as I stare at his soft pink lips and remember how amazing they had felt last night. I shake my head and snap out of it, picking up a few stray items of clothing from the floor and gathering them in my arms as I make my way to find Arizona or Alex and devise an escape plan.
I find Arizona in the kitchen, happily humming to herself whilst making everyone coffee. She smiles, wide and bright as always, in spite of her obvious hangover.
“Hey!” she chirps. She looks down to see me clutching my heels, jacket and bra. “Ooooohhhh, you look guilty.” It’s as if she’s just heard the juiciest gossip of the year.
“Of what?!” I go on the defence, obviously.
“I could literally take a picture of you right now and use it as a definition of walk of shame,” she explains, laughing a little. She stirs a couple of sugars into two of the coffees. “Do you and your lover boy want coffee?”
“He’s not my lover boy, shut up! And no, I don’t. I want to get out of here… are you coming?”
“No. Come upstairs, we’re having coffee. Alex has just gone to buy bacon sandwiches so go wake Owen up…”
“I’d rather not, he looks like he’s tired,” I half-lie. He does look tired, but that’s not the reason I don’t want him to wake.
Arizona is in that mood where she won’t take no for an answer and as we climb the stairs to Meredith’s room, I hope conversation will steer clear of last night. I step through the door to a big, open room with a huge double bed underneath a large bay window. Meredith is still in the bed, propped up on the white metal frame with some pillows. Close to the bed is a coffee table with two beanbags nearby, one being occupied by Callie who’s curled up and wearing what looks like 4 or 5 layers. Arizona places the coffee tray carefully next to her and casually flops into the empty bean bag.
“Mornin’,” Callie groans.
“Hmmmm,” I grumble back. “Does anyone else feel like the last round of shots were completely unnecessary last night?”
Nobody answers but they all raise their hands in agreement, nodding.
Meredith pats the bed next to her and pulls the coves up for me to join her. “Where’s Owen?”
“Still asleep,” I dismiss.
“Is there a particular reason for him to be so sleepy?” Meredith teases as I shuffle over on the bed to share her pillow.
“No,” I curtly say. She thoughtfully narrows her eyes at my rudeness but drops it.
“Hey Shep! You’re up! Here,” Alex greets, throwing me a wrapped bacon sandwich as he strolls into the room and collapses sideways across the foot of the bed, handing the others their orders. “Where’s Owen?”
“Ugh, he’s asleep! Leave him be,” I mutter.
“Actually, I’m not.” His voice causes my heart to jump into my throat. I avoid looking at him but divert my eyes directly into the suspicious gaze of Meredith. I inwardly curse and just stare at my bacon instead, the room becoming white noise to my guilt-ridden ears.
I silently pray he’ll sit next to Callie but he walks over to the bed, sits and rests his feet up on the covers next to me. His arm grazes against mine and I can’t help but look to the patch of burning skin where we’re connected. I peer up from under my brow, curious as to what he is concentrating on- Callie, who I think is reminding the room of the karaoke attempts from last night, or me. It’s me. He’s watching my face, trying to gauge my reaction to his purposefully close proximity, and he smiles as (of course) the automatic blush creeps into my cheeks. I’m so confused- a few hours ago he was cheating on his girlfriend but he’s acting as if nothing is wrong. I’m acting as if nothing is wrong. Perhaps we can convince ourselves we did nothing wrong…