Addiction is not a weakness, addiction is a disease. Watching her as I grew up with sunken in eyes, muttering to herself was something I did not ask for but I loved her anyway. Don’t let somebody else’s disease destroy you.
Do not expect them to change. Do not expect them to change. Do not put your sanity into their sobriety. Support them. Do not expect them to change because they are your mother, father, because they love you.
When they call you at 4 a.m. slurring their words sobbing, tell them you love them. Then remember to love yourself too, hang up. Go back to bed. I know it hurts.
Even if she screams at you as she collapses on the floor, know deep down somewhere she loves you. Right now she can’t walk straight let alone get her shit together. Hold her.
The person standing before you is not the person you know. It is the addict within them — this took me 15 years to understand. Addicts are dishonest, sneaky, narcissistic, and thieves. My mother is intelligent, strong willed, determined and adventurous. Learn to know the difference.
There will be ups and downs. Cherish the ups. No matter how short. Try to let the past go, so you can have time to make better memories, trust me. Anger is going to consume you. I want you to bite your tongue.
When they reach recovery and sobriety, don’t talk down to them about how they fucked up. They are well aware and they are not proud. Do not increase the self hatred they already feel.
If it gets to be too much in one night? Leave. I understand all too well.
For the love of God, do not play with fire. Don’t you dare inject toxic into your veins like they did.
As you get older it’ll make more sense than it does right now. Your nightmares will ease and you will learn to trust again.
When they get in deep, you’ll drive to their house to make sure they are still there, still conscious. You’ll call constantly desperate to hear their voice. In my opinion this is the worst form of anxiety. You’re going to make it. Breathe.
Addiction can sink so deep into you, that it has the ability to kill you. Do not be afraid to call 911 when they’re passed out, wheezing. When they’re covered in their own vomit, hyperventilating. They will be angry. But they will also be alive.
Do yourself a favor and remind those around you who also deal with her cruel words, that this isn’t their fault. She’s not herself. Be realistic. Hope is excellent until you drown yourself in it.
A personal message from the daughter of two addicts to you — it will be okay. You don’t have to be like them, you are not them. This is an infinite battle but you will heal. I did.
do you ever sit on your bed thinking why you are still alive? after all the overdoses, the cigarettes you smoke, the new drugs you tried? you’re still alive after all the alcohol, the accidents, the drawbacks. you live even if you destroy yourself every day, despite you are conscious of you actions. you are still fucking alive and you don’t even know why
I’m happy to assume that’s Sherlock’s only high when the story clearly tells us he is. Mainly because if we do that, there’s an important theme to it. Within the story, Sherlock only gets high when he thinks he’s lost John. That’s more than he can handle.
The first time we see Sherlock high is after John’s wedding, when they’ve been apart for a month and John is missing Sherlock horribly. It makes sense that Sherlock is missing John horribly as well, though he doesn’t explicitly tell us so. But if Sherlock replaces John with drugs, that would be about on par with John’s dreams about Sherlock; they both revert to their former state, as it were.
Sherlock also got high either immediately before or immediately after saying what was meant to be a final goodbye to John on the tarmac. Here he is: losing John again, for good.
We know that Sherlock’s drug use is related to moments of emotional distress because Mycroft tells us so. He thought Irene’s presumed death would strike Sherlock hard, and warned John about a potential danger night. But drugs make no appearance at that time.
Both times we’ve known for sure that Sherlock has returned to his drug use, he’s told us that it’s for a case. First in some kind of bizarre attempt to mislead Magnussen, which fails utterly, and then to help him dig into his mind palace, which also fails utterly, given how screwy and confusing his mind palace becomes. I think these “it’s for a case, I swear” explanations are both nonsense. They are fibs to hide an uncomfortable truth (something we know he does, see: lying about where he learned to fold napkins). Sherlock is a lying liar who lies.
He clearly does not need drugs to enter his mind palace. So why does he suddenly need them in TAB? And even if he did, why on earth would he have them at the ready on the plane for this purpose? And if that was such a good idea, why does he counterproductively lose himself inside his hallucination and honestly forget that it is one? He has no control over that trip into his mind palace. Sounds like another ruse to me.
Sherlock doesn’t take drugs to help him solve crimes. He takes drugs when he’s in emotional pain. The only kind of emotional pain Sherlock can’t handle without drugs is losing John.