drive thru window

the foxhole court as john mulaney quotes
  • neil: i'll keep all my emotions right here and then one day i'll die
  • andrew: it is 100% easier not to do things than to do them
  • aaron: sometimes, babies will point at me, and I don't care for that shit at all
  • nicky: eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs
  • kevin: im really sorry about last night, it’s just that im mean and loud. it probably will happen again
  • dan: you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair
  • matt: THATS MY WIFE!
  • renee: i think emily dickison is a lesbian
  • allison: i am a proud, asian american woman, and you will treat me with respect!
  • wymack: i pulled up to the drive thru window at mcdonalds and ordered a black coffee for myself and kept driving. The one thing no kid at mcdonalds can ever enjoy
  • riko: This is an on-fire trash can

Director: Because we’re putting all of our resources behind the three of you, it’s time that we offered you greater assistance when you’re on a mission. And, to that end, we’ve hired a new seeker, whose sole responsibility will be providing you with live intel when you’re hunting down a grand relic. Uh, can I see your stones of far-speech for a moment?

Merle: What are those?

Griffin: Uh, you fork over your three walkie-talkie-esque stones of far-speech and she withdraws a small wand from her robes and she points it at each one, and she twists her wand a little bit and hands them back to you. And she smiles, because the next thing you hear comes from your stones of far-speech, you hear a voice say:

Travis: [pinching nose] Uh, yeah, just drive up to the drive-thru window–

Griffin: Nope. You hear a voice say:

Angus: Hello, sirs!

[Magnus, Taako, Merle all gasp.]

Magnus: It’s… it’s the Boy Detective! It’s Angus!

Griffin: And the door behind you opens and standing there, in the doorway, you see holding another stone of far-speech, Angus McDonald!

Taako: That’s my dude!

anonymous asked:

Wait are drive through strippers an actual thing

okay, so i asked my twitter feed if bikini barista stands were something exclusive to the Pacific Northwest, and the answer was overwhelmingly “what the fuck are you talking about??” so, to answer your question in short: absolutely. 

long answer: they are real and in the places i have lived in washington and oregon, they are everywhere. they are usually a drive-thru kiosk with a window on each side and all-female baristas who wear only bikinis.  they are known for making admittedly the worst coffee ever for the highest prices, and the girls who work there make a ton of money.  i had a few friends in college who were able to pay for school, because they would average roughly $700 a week in tips on top of tacoma’s-then $9/hr.  one girl i knew who worked at one full-time made $10k a month after taxes. she also had a walk-in closet entirely devoted to bikinis and costumes from Hustler Hollywood, and if you ever want to hear the story about the one time i decided to let an amateur wax my privates on her couch in late 2011, this girl was definitely a key player in that story.  

anyways, i have never seen an all-male version of the bikini barista stand (all which have names like HOT CHICK-A-LATTE, BIKINI BOTTOMS ESPRESSO, etc), which is a crying shame because i will chug nasty black sludge that’s been sitting on the counter over night for some grossly objectified dudes shamelessly wearing a playboy bunny outfit and sucking whipped cream off of each other’s chest, u feel me??? and so would victor nikiforov. 

the doctors as john mulaney quotes

one: i’m really sorry about last night, it’s just that im mean and loud. it will probably happen again.

two: i put on a sweater and a pair of corduroy pants and i felt safe

three: they’re like, “does that work?” i’m like, “it didn’t NOT work.”

four: i pulled up to the drive thru window at mcdonalds and ordered a black coffee for myself and kept driving. the one thing no kid at mcdonalds can ever enjoy

five: i yelled “fuck da police!” and everyone else joined in. a hundred drunk white children yelling fuck da police

six: sometimes babies will point at me, and i do not care for that shit at all.

seven: everyone get out of my way! i just want to sit here and feed my birds

eight: i know you told me, but i have had a very long day, i am very small, and i have no money, so you can imagine the stress im under

nine: im an idiot, and i’ve shovelled through life rather nicely so far, so i don’t feel like i deserve good treatment.

ten: if you’re ever on the highway behind me, uh… i hear you honking, and i also don’t want me to be doing what im doing

eleven: i don’t look like someone who used to do anything. i look like i was just sitting in a room in a chair eating saltines for like 28 years. and then i walked right out here.

twelve: i like to lean in and go “stop snitchin’ motherfucker” and walk off. ‘cause you’re never too young to learn our national no snitching policy

thirteen: it’s like having a baby that is also a grandma. her body is young, her face is as old as time.


the war doctor: you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair

the signs as quotes from "the comeback kid"
  • aries: eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs
  • taurus: here's an on fire garbage can... could be a nursery
  • gemini: "you have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair," you know, how you talk to a child
  • cancer: marijuana is legal in 18 or 19 states. it's insane. don't whoo if you're white. it's always been legal for us, come on sir
  • leo: i know you told me, but i have had a very long day, i am very small, and i have no money, so you can imagine the stress im under
  • virgo: "oh we have to go!! we have to go see bill!" and without looking up at her my dad goes, "why? it's not like he's gonna remember you."
  • libra: so my dad pulled up to the drive thru window and ordered a black coffee. the one thing no kid can every enjoy
  • scorpio: anyone who's seen my dick and met my parents needs to die
  • sagittarius: bill clinton turns, looks at my mom and says, "hey ellen!" cause he never forgets a bitch ever
  • capricorn: we bought a house that was built in the 20s but it was flipped in 2014, which means it's haunted but it has a lovely kitchen backsplash
  • aquarius: we were at lion king on broadway and there was a five year old behind us going, "look it's pumbaa! look its timon!" and my dad turned around and said, "are you going to talk the entire time?"
  • pisces: some people give off a vibe of.. right away, and they're like, "do not fuck with me." my vibe is more like, "hey, you could pour soup in my lap and i'll probably apologize to you!"
Ninnie’s Big Fat Writing Masterlist!

Headcanons/Short Scenarios:

S/O Pregnancy Headcanons:

Winter Chill (Winter Drabbles):

Tech is Against The Chocobros:

Oneshots/Longer Reads:

~Masterlist blog page~

f-da-program  asked:

How about the losers working a crappy summer job hcs? Like at a fast food joint or something?

-Richie for sure works at a drive thru window at some fast food joint with neon orange and red lights. All the Losers take trips to visit him in Bill or Eddie’s cars. He definitely secretly eats the food and tries to charm every customer that pulls up to the window despite his dumb paper hat. Ever since Bev asked for him to bring home fries on his first day, he brings her some everyday.  

-Bill works at the movie theater, much to Richie jealousy who was not hired. This means he hooks the losers up with tickets and popcorn whenever he can. He is a responsible worker who loves when it’s his day to clean the glass covered movie posters that are lined up on the brick wall outside. As he cleans, he makes up his own stories based on the artwork of the poster.

-Mike works at this really cool diner and does whatever he can to help. He mops, waits tables, takes bus boy duties etc. The Losers love to visit and slurp down a different kind of milkshake each time (Sometimes Richie drinks one for himself and then helps Eddie finish his own.) Mike keeps a stash of quarters for the jukebox machine for Bev and Richie to fight over.

-Ben works at the library! He applied several times until he was finally hired. All of his co-workers are old ladies who frown each time Richie comes in for a visit. Ben occasionally picks out books for the Losers (He knows Stan loves the bird books). He has the tendency to go off on tangents about books and the Losers never interrupt, they let him talk about what he loves.

-Beverly works at a record shop. She was actually rejected by the manager but came in one day and saw an abandoned broom and started sweeping. She came in everyday afterwards and organized albums, cleaned etc. None of the employees were sure what she was doing so they let her. The manager finally noticed and just decided to keep her. She is now being fully paid. 

-Stan works at the school over the summer doing what he loves, organizing and cataloging books. He spends the day walking around the place and working, he’s friendly with all the janitors. Richie thinks it would be soooo fun for all the Losers to spend the night in the creepy school and Stan rejects the idea every time he suggests it. 

-Eddie works at the little ice cream stand in the park. His boss is a kind old man who lets him and his friends have free samples. He knows his mother hates him being around something so unhealthy everyday and that’s why he loves it so much. The Losers are always around, acting like they aren’t just visiting for the ice cream. Richie walks Eddie home and Eddie always has an ice cream cone for him. 

-They all have jars where they put in their savings in case of fun trips or emergencies. 

Spilled Milkshakes

Pairing: Rob Benedict x Reader

Summary: Reader works at a drive-thru of a fairly popular fast-food restaurant, and one night, she spills a large strawberry milkshake on the lap and car of one person (or two) she reeeeeally didn’t want to embarrass herself in front of.  

Warnings: good milkshake being spilled!!! Richard Speight Jr being Richard Speight Jr!!! 

A/N: Hi. You must be wondering why I am, once again, posting a random one instead of…say…your request, or the first part to that Chuck series, or the next part to the Billy series…well. I’m procrastinating. Again. 

Keep reading

Double Shot - Part 5

Characters - Steve x Reader, Tesla, Pietro Maximoff, Brief mention of T’Challa Udaku

Word Count - 1708

Warnings - Language, Drama

AU - Coffee Shop

Co-Writer for this part - @bovaria

A/N - It’s been a while, huh? Sloooow burn. Also, I would slap Pietro tbh.

Double Shot Masterlist

Originally posted by mackievanstan

For the next couple weeks, all you could think about was the night Tesla dragged you out to that dinner. You tried your hardest to busy yourself, but your mind always wandered back to the thought of Steve. Having not seen him since that day, you couldn’t help but wonder what his intentions were. His smooth voice and the way his breath hit your ear would haunt your dreams on a nightly basis. You tried to get a grip on it. Being sure that you were just thinking too far into his advances, you avoid telling your friends these feelings at all cost. That was until you found yourself sat in the living room with the only person that you thought could give you some insight.

Keep reading


Gif source:  Batman

Imagine working a late night drive thru window and having Batman come through for a burger.

——— Request for autumnslioness-dearie ———

“I’m sorry, sir, can you repeat that?” you ask, not having quite caught the complete order thanks to the man’s scratchy voice combined with your crap headset. You kept telling the manager these things needed an update, but did she listen? The answer is no. You manage to catch the rest of the order after that, finishing up with a chipper, “Thank you, sir. Please come to the first window!” You sounded much happier than you really were to be working the late night shift.

When the customer pulls around, you nearly drop the drink you were making at who you see, “Is that B-Batman?” You open the drive thru window, “U-Um, Batman? Am I getting pranked?”

He looks like a void of black as you look into his high tech car that practically growls at you while Batman chuckles, raspy and deep with a metallic twinge, “No, this isn’t a prank. You said it was $15.64?”

You can barely believe it, “Yep.”

AU where Ignis has just graduated with a fancy culinary arts degree but gets hired to cater at a children’s birthday party.

AU where Prompto responds to an anonymous photography job offer and it turns out to be for an adult calendar.

AU where Gladio gets a job in security but it’s at a quiet retirement home and he ends up playing bingo with old people every Friday.

AU where Noctis works at a drive-thru window for a ghetto mcdonald’s that constantly gets bad reviews and people keep yelling at him like “don’t forget my fucking fries this time or I’ll snap your neck!”

You Love Me?

hiii, been meaning to make this tumblr for months, but hopefully you like this! anyway, just being an aspiring actor

“Stop,” you whined, squirming in your bed and attempting to push Jason away from your face. He laughed lightly, continuing to pepper kisses across your face.

“Jason,” you dragged out his name, but did nothing further. Deep down you loved it, each kiss leaving a ghost of a smile on your face.

“Come on, let’s go get some McDonald’s. I’m hungry.” You glanced at the clock beside your bed: 3:47 A.M. You groaned, turning toward Jason again and cupping his face in his hands. He was shirtless in his boxers, hovering above you while you slept in a sports bra and some boxer shorts underwear – it was a particularly hot night in Angel Grove. You pulled Jason’s face closer to you and pecked his lips, meaning to pull away but Jason’s hand came up to cup the back of your neck and deepen it. You let out a small moan as he swiped his tongue on your bottom lip, pulling away to catch his breath.

“Fine,” you sighed, your heavy breathing matching his, “let’s go.” Jason smiled, pecking you again before throwing on his discarded sweats and a shirt, offering you your pajama shorts and the first shirt he saw on the floor.

“Stop switching the channels, I liked that song,” you switched it back to the previous station, listening as Ariana’s voice lowly filled the car. Your hand went back to rest on the center console, intertwining your fingers with Jason’s.

“You want the regular?” You nodded as Jason rolled up to the drive-thru window. You looked at his profile as he distracted himself with the person on the other side of the intercom. Your eyes traced his jaw to his hair, your hand unconsciously coming up to run your fingers through it. Jason turned to face you, smiling and leaning in to kiss your cheek as yours turned red having been caught. “Here you go babe,” Jason parked the car in an empty space and handed you your chicken nuggets and large fries, taking out his same order.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, diving immediately into the fries. Jason smiled, it was his turn to admire you. You and he had been dating for quite some time – five months. He had been hesitant to ask you out at first, even though he’d been wanting to for weeks. His duties as a ranger prevented that though. He’d read plenty of comic books and seen plenty of movies to know how much danger you’d be in if you were involved with him. But, when he saw you shove some bully off Billy, he knew he probably wouldn’t be able to contain himself. Even though he kept his secret from you as best as he could, but one day you had walked in on him morphing. He had been having trouble morphing lately, not being able to do it during practices. So, he took whatever time he had to himself, alone, to practice morphing again. When he finally did, you had walked in on him red-suited. That sparked your first argument, but after telling you the pact he made to keep his identity hidden, you’d eventually forgiven him.

Now, here he was looking at you – admiring you, for always being beside him. Through everything. He couldn’t love you anymore than he already did.

Not that he had ever told you that, though.

“I had fun this weekend, Jason.” You were bidding Jason a farewell before your parents got home from the anniversary weekend getaway. You both stood at your door entrance with him standing outside and you leaning on the door frame.

“I did too, babe.” He leaned up, due to your height advantage, and pecked you.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. I love you!” Jason turned around, not immediately realizing he had just told you he loved you for the first time – you, however, did not let it go unnoticed.

“Jason!” He turned around, confusion on his face – it still hadn’t registered in his mind. “Did you – did you just say you loved me?” And then Jason’s face turned to one of shock, his cheeks burning from embarrassment.

“I – no, I,” He scrambled to find words for what he said, not wanting to scare you off. “I didn’t!”

“Jason… it’s okay,” you walked toward him but his face went from embarrassed to defensive.

“No! I didn’t say I loved you. I didn’t mean it.” He didn’t mean for it to come out as bad or as harsh as it did, but he said it. And he couldn’t take it back. And, god, did that hurt. Jason recognized the look on your face quickly and tried to correct himself. “No! I just mean –.”

“No, I get it. I’ll see you at school.” You stormed into your house, slamming the door and locking it, not bothering to listen to the pounding on your door and Jason repeatedly screaming your name. You sank down into your bed and sighed, not noticing the few tears that hit your pillow.

Jason walked around the halls looking for you. He’d waited at your locker, waited by your first and third period, but didn’t find you until lunch. You were sitting with Trini. He walked over toward your table casually, not picking up his pace until you made eye contact and started to collect your things. “(Y/N)! Wait, baby. Please!” Trini looked at you and Jason confused. You two never fought, despite that one time when you found out he was a ranger.

“What, Jason?” Your words were sharp, harsh. And though it hurt him to hear you so mad at him, he pushed through it.

“I need to talk to you.”

“We don’t have anything to say to each other.” You continued to walk and Jason panicked so he did the only thing he could think of.

“I love you!” You stopped walking, turning to face him. Your eyes wide as you looked at everyone staring at you in the cafeteria. “I love you. I love you so much.” You walked toward Jason, begging him to quiet down. “No. I want everyone to know,” he grabbed your hand and intertwined your fingers, holding them both up. “I love you, (Y/N) (L/N).”

Jason brought your conjoined hands to his lips, lightly kissing the back of your hands. His voice dropped to a whisper as he said, “I love you. I have for awhile. I’m sorry about yesterday. I freaked out because I thought it wasn’t what you wanted and I thought I was going to scare you away. I just don’t want to lose you.”

You cut off his rambling by cupping his face and bringing his lips to yours, kissing him deeply. Your hands reached up to wrap around his neck as he smiled through the kiss, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you slightly.

“I love you, Jason Scott. So much.”

“You guys are gross.” You both smiled at Trini, knowing she was joking with her smile.

I may already be gone

You think I am in control?
You think this is what I want to be?
You think that this is me?

You’re wrong. If only I could get you
To stop, look me in the eyes.
Maybe you would see a fraction
Of what’s going on.

I’m not invisible but I’ve gotten good
At going unseen, I’ll always be one of
Those people who is easily forgotten.

I can’t help but blame myself, if only
I had found a way to be different,
To be better, to be more expected,
At least a way to function
With others.

Still part of me revels in desires
To be alone, not in everything, but
In how I see the world and thirst for
A purpose to call my own, it’s
Selfish and shitty really.

When I was young I felt so much
Rejection some of it real, some of
It overblown, but I spent too much
Time in a house alone as a boy.
Confused, angry and scared
Of everyone.

Now I have most conversations
Through drive-thru windows,
Picking up dinners eaten in
Silence and no matter what I
Consume I’m always empty.
My soul starving in isolation.

If I don’t find someone
To hold me soon I swear
I’ll dissolve.

mothman is real and I saw him behind the drive-thru window at mcdonalds at three in the morning and he told me that the mcflurry machine broke

Today we took our dog with us on a Wendy’s run. When we got to the drive thru window, the cashier told us the car in front of us decided to pay for our meal just because he liked our dog. Rocky got a chicken nugget for being a good boy, and that man restored my faith in humanity for the rest of the day.