dreams become nightmares

my dreams
become nightmares
when you are not there
because if you
leave my thoughts,
maybe you will
leave my life too.
—  nightmares by shelby leigh

i. in another version of this story, she is sitting beside me on the bed, grumpy as she is on mornings, rolling her eyes but stifling a smile. she says my puns are dumb but i know she secretly loves them. i whisper to her and kiss her, and i stare at her as she finally spills her laughter like the scent of the brewing coffee downstairs. this is another good morning. this is another good day.

ii. in another version of this story, today is my birthday and she waits for me to finish fixing up my blue evening dress—we’re matching colors: she’s already all dressed up, all tux and ties, except her shoes. she’s still wearing that same old black sneakers ever since i gave it to her on her birthday almost two years ago. it’s already starting to get frayed but she said those are her favorite and she’ll wear it whatever the season or occasion is, and true enough, she wore it even to my birthday dinner date.

iii. in another version of this story, only clothes and shoes get worn out. i do not second guess her intentions nor doubt her feelings.

iv. but in the version of this story where i’m in, good days are only found in dreams and alternate universes. i am not her favorite sneakers but the red boots she found in the store’s aisle—all too pretty but too uncomfortable to wear so i ended up forgotten in the closet long ago. i am as tattered as my relationships and my worn-out clothes. in this version of the story, today is just another day.

Scars

Mushy fluff for you guys. I really like how this turned out. 

Dany lays awake at night and runs her hands over Jon’s scars. She thinks about them and the man who bears them. Ep 6 spoilers

Pairing: Jon Snow/Daenerys Targaryen

It was a cold night in the Lord’s chambers of Winterfell, colder than any other night ever seen by the North. The army of the dead were approaching. Winter is here. Winterfell always had a chill she could never quite get away from. The fire burned in the fireplace and the moonlight dimly lit the room. A cold chill swept throughout the room. Dany felt the chill straight to her bones even though she was bundled up in thick, heavy furs. Dany had only been in Winterfell for a month, but the chill was unlike anything she had experienced before. Even after going North of the wall when she blew fire on the Night King, the chill in Winterfell had her more frozen then that day. Ice and death were at the castles doors.

Dany had many nights she stayed awake. The worry and fear seeping into her veins as she thought of the war to come. You have to see it to know. Now I know. Her dreams have become nightmares filled with ice blue eyes, harsh winds, blinding snow, and freezing water. She will never forget that day. The day one of her children died. The screech she heard as the Night King throw an icy spear to her fiery dragon. Poor, sweet Viseron had always been the sweetest of her children. He would make sweet sounds when she was near, and always was gentle when he soared through the sky. He wasn’t as big as Rhagael and Drogon, but he was just a fierce. Dany remembered watching the life drain from his eyes and drown into the frozen lake. The memories made her shutter. She felt frozen.

Dany sat up in the bed and looked around the room. Winterfell was so grey and gloomy. How had Jon lived here his whole life? She wanted to travel with him to Essos. She wanted him to taste sweet summer wines and eat suckling pork with honey glaze. She wanted to swim with him in the bright blue waters that surrounded Meereen. She wanted to fly her dragons with him over the desert and see what other kinds of mountains existed, mountains of sand. She wanted to see him in traditional warm weather clothes. She wanted him to feel the heat of the sun on his skin. She wanted to show him the city and Narrow Sea from the top of the pyramid she commanded. Alas, none of that ever seemed like it was going to happen.

Dany felt Jon stir in the bed beside her. They had taken up sharing the Lord’s chambers as their relationship was no secret by now. As much as she tried to hide her love for Jon, her eyes gave her away. Lady Arya as sharp as a knife was the first one to notice the closeness of her relationship with Jon which was much more than allies. The Northern Lords had despised her at first. They wanted nothing to do with a Targaryen. Jon, the ever stupidly foolish noble man he is, defended her until his face turned red. The Lords had grown to accept her when they realized it didn’t matter who sit on throne as the dead approached. Jon didn’t do anything to hide their relationship. He would grab her hand in the courtyard and kiss her in the godswood. At Lady Sansa’s urging they finally made their relationship known, it hadn’t mattered that much at all what people thought as death approached. To be honest, Dany didn’t care. She loved Jon, and no one was going to tell her other wise.

Dany turned back to look at Jon. He was laying with arms stretched out if reaching for her. His curls were a wild mess and he had a peaceful look on his face. Dany sometimes forgot how young he was. How cruel the world had been to him at such a young age? Sometimes she wonders how he survived it all? Did he always feel alone never knowing his mother? Did he have a good relationship with Robb? How did he feel when Catelyn Tully looked on him with hate? Did he ever dream of having a wife? A child? He told her once he took the black because he believed there was nothing left for him in the world. It made her seethe with hate for Catelyn Tully for making Jon believe he could never be loved. Dany was going to show him otherwise. She would make sure he always knew he was loved. She loved him with all her heart and she never wanted to see him hurt like that again.

Dany saw Jon’s brow crease when he realized she had been gone from his arms for too long. He always reached for her in his sleep. Dany moved back down and went into Jon’s welcoming embrace. A ghost of a smile creeped up on his lips when she held him. She was glad she could bring some comfort to his weary mind. He always looked worried, always one for brooding she thought. Sometimes she would call him the Brooding King to mock him when he had a particular look on his face. He hated the nickname at first, but found it would bring him joy after she had kissed the brooding look off his face.

Dany brought her hand up to his chest. Jon was the most beautiful man she had ever seen. He was built like a warrior, had a strong jawline, beautiful curls, and the most gentle grey eyes. His gruff northern accent only an added bonus. He never seemed to notice how the women in Winterfell looked at him. Their king. They would stare at her with jealous eyes. Dany didn’t care. You are mine. I am yours. The most beautiful part of Jon was his scars. An odd thing for a woman to find attractive, but it made him who he was. To her, Jon was perfect.

Dany traced over the jagged scars on his abdomen. Rough and pink, looking like they were fresh and new. Dany knew Jon was insecure about them, and they brought up horrible memories. She always had to remind him that they were scars of a former life. They were there to remind him of why the red priestess brought him back. He was needed in the war to come, and if he had remained dead she never would have met him. The only people who knew of his resurrection were his closest family, advisors, and her. Ser Davos foolishly bringing it up when he was back in the throne room in Dragonstone. A knife in the heart for his people.

Dany was always curious about them after she heard Ser Davos say that. She had brought it up multiple times to Jon and he always gave her a vague answer. It wasn’t until he was unconscious and on the brink of death, that she realized Ser Davos told the truth. She had seen them with her own eyes on the boat after he returned from beyond the wall. She had seen them on full display as she sat next to him on the boat. He didn’t seem to notice as his full attention was on her. He had comforted her over the loss of her child, and called her his queen. Overcome with emotion, she held his hand. Only when she tried to pull back and he held on tighter, she realized Tyrion was telling the truth. He was in love with her. Dany, the foolish girl she was, had let go and walked out of the room too stunned to stay. Her feelings overtook her as she exited the room and went to the bow of the ship. She knew she loved him before, but the depth of that love she only fully discovered then. She certainly didn’t think he felt the same way. She didn’t feel worthy of him, even though she was a queen. It wasn’t until he came to her on the ride to Winterfell that she fully gave into her love for him and laid with him.

Dany traced each scar slowly with tears forming in her eyes. How could his own men turn on him? She tried to imagine how he felt when each stab went into his body. The very men he trusted with his life had betrayed him. He must have felt so cold and alone. He had just lost his Wilding girl and now the very boy who killed her put a knife in his own heart. If she could be there, she would have killed the boy with her own hands. She briefly remembers of the time when Jon told her he got stabbed. She had been stranded somewhere in Essos after Drogon rescued her from the mob during the tourney. She swears to him she heard a wolf cry in the distance that night. She remembers feeling so alone. She wished she could have been there with him to protect him. She would have given her life for his.

Dany finally reached the scar by his heart and the tears came. The final blow. The end. He could have been taken from her forever if it weren’t for the red priestess. She’ll have to thank Melisandre one day if she sees her again. The priestess who brought them together. Ice and fire. She could feel his beating heart under her palm. Jon had such a good heart. He was selfless, brave, honest, and noble. He was the kindest man she had ever met. He had always treated her as an equal and shared the same world view as her. He was her match in every way possible. The ice to her fire. She the fire to his ice. Dany felt her heart swell at the depth of the love she had for Jon. She would protect his heart. The Night King can take everything from her, even her life, but he would never take Jon. She would make sure of that.

Dany slowed raised her head and kissed the scar on his heart. She felt Jon stir underneath her.

She felt his hand weave into her curls and grab her hand that rested on his heart.

She looked up at him with tender eyes.

He blinked groggy from sleep and smiled at her.

“What are you doing up so late?” He said in his gruff northern accent.

Dany looked into his eyes and the emotions of her thoughts raised to the surface.

She stroked his cheek with her right hand. Jon looked at her with worry in his eyes.

“Are you okay?” He stroked the back of her head.

A lone tear fell down her cheek. “I love you…” she said and moved her hand down to trace the scar over his heart. “..all of you.” She kissed the scar for a second time that night.

He looked at her with the same look he had on the boat so long ago. He raised her head with both his hand so she was level with his face. “I love you.” He repeated her words to her softly.

He leaned up and gave her a soft kiss. Dany overcome with emotion kissed him back tenderly pouring her heart into the kiss. She lifted her head and leaned their foreheads together.

Listening to his soft breath Dany blurted out something she had been thinking for a while now.

“Marry me.” she said softly with her eyes still closed.

Jon let out a soft gasp in surprise and moved her head up so she could look into his eyes.

He looked at her with shock and awe. Dany looked down with embarrassment, she hadn’t meant to blurt out such a thought.

She looked back up at him and he just looked her quietly with love in his eyes. She made a decision for herself. Dany had never been able to choose something on her own. Vast circumstances and duty to her people always overshadowed what she needed for herself. She had resigned herself to life without love after Drogo and her sweet summer child had died. She never expected to meet someone she would choose to love during the most dangerous, and unexpected of times. She was tired of choosing duty and honor over love. She had given everything to this war, maybe she deserved something for herself even if it only was for a short while as death was at their door. She wanted him. She wanted this. She wanted to marry him in the moonlight under the godswood with his family there. She wanted to marry him because she loved him, not for political gain or an alliance with the North. She didn’t care too much for the throne these days. So she made a decision, and went with her heart.

“Marry me now before the dead come. I don’t want to spend the short time we have left wondering what could be. If we die, we die, but now we live. I don’t want to spend another moment without you by my side. I want the world to know I am yours, and you are mine. Let the night king be damned. I love you and I want to marry you under the godswood while we still have the chance, not for an alliance but because we love each other.” She spoke so quickly, almost mumbling the whole speech.

She looked at him with love shining in her eyes. She waited nervously for his response. She knew he accepted their shared blood relation, but he always been hesitant anytime Tyrion or Ser Davos brought up the subject of a political alliance by marriage.

He held her face in his hands and she swears she had never seen a more beautiful sight. She nearly cried at the beauty of it.

He looked at her with his eyes so open and vulnerable and smiled at her the smiled only reserved for her.

“Nothing would make me happier, Dany.” He said in a soft voice.

She smiled at him a wide smile with tears in her eyes and grabbed his face and kissed him passionately.

He kissed her back fiercely and rolled her over. She felt as if her heart could burst.

The cold air faded away, the night king a pile of snow on the ground, the iron throne a melted pile of swords, and a dream of spring coming into her mind.

She made love for the first time that night. Yes, they had lain with each other many times before, but something about this time felt different, more special. Sex had always been enjoyable for her, but with Jon she felt as if the fire and heat ran through her soul and veins.

As he lay on top of her, deep inside her, she touched the scar over his heart and smiled.

Underneath that scar was his beating heart, and she would make sure it would keep beating until her last breath.

ironic things about the instinctual variants:

SP: it ends up becoming so focused on staying alive, making a comfortable life and getting done day to day tasks that it circles around into the inability to do any. SP doms regularity sacrifice parts of their lives to make others work– but it builds up and builds up until it comes crumbling down. You can only neglect parts of your life for so long– your social life, work, education– before it catches up to you. It’s when they forget balance.

SX: sx doms can be hilariously unaware of the effects of their actions on others. They can be so hyper focused into what they do or who they’re with that they completely forsake other areas of their life. Their vision and their dream becomes their waking nightmare from which they have trouble escaping due to their obsession.

SO: so doms have a habit of alienating many of the people they seek to attract. No offence, but anyone can see through you guys. Anyone that has issues with people that are shallow, reputation-oriented, or who have hollow interactions will not want to be around you… regardless of whether you see yourself acting like that, others perceive it that way, and so doms have trouble navigating how to deal with those people… which ends up with the aforementioned alienation– for people who would prefer that people don’t turn against them, they sure as hell act in ways that encourage it.

Fall 2017 Pride Readings

Fall is finally here and with it comes LGBT History Month in October. To celebrate, I’ve compiled a list of books with queer main characters. All books have been/will be published in the second half of 2017. Feel free to add more titles!

The Gallery of Unfinished Girls by Lauren Karcz- A young artist must take care of herself and her younger sister when her mother rushes off to Puerto Rico to take care of her grandmother who has fallen into a coma. She’s also falling in love with her best friend. While struggling with her art, a new neighbor introduces her to the Red Mangrove Estate, an artists’ colony. The catch? No art can leave the Estate.

Little and Lion by Brandy Colbert- Colbert’s sophomore novel is about a black, Jewish, bisexual girl named Suzette and her brother Lionel who fall in love with the same girl. Lionel struggles with bipolar disorder and adjusting to his medication. If you haven’t read Colbert’s first novel, Pointe, run to your nearest bookstore/ereader and buy it! It’s amazing!

Dress Codes for Small Towns by Courtney Stevens- This book holds a special place in my southern, living in the small town, queer heart. Billie is the daughter of a preacher in a small Kentucky town, and she loves her community and her group of friends called the Hexagon. The group bands together to save the community’s fall festival and Billie struggles to find the space she needs to understand and express her gender and sexuality. It’s easily one of my favorite books of this year!

They Both Die in the End by Adam Silvera- Title tells you everything. Silvera’s third novel has already hit the NYT bestseller list and I’ve heard it’s just as amazing as History is all you Left Me and More Happy Than Not. Features two Latino boys who become friends after they both receive a call that they’ll both be dead within 24 hours. I haven’t read it yet, but if it’s anything like Silvera’s other books, I’ll need a box of tissues close by.

Mask of Shadows by Linsey Miller- A genderfluid teen wants revenge after losing everyone and everything that’s ever mattered to them. Sal decides to audition for the Left Hand, the queen’s elite group of assassins, but to earn their place, Sal must compete in a fight to the death.

Girls Made of Snow and Glass by Melissa Bashardoust- Who wants to read a retelling of Snow White where she’s a lesbian? This book is a duel POV between Lynet (Snow White) and Mina(the stepmother) who are only alive because of Mina’s dangerous and powerful father, who gave her a heart of glass.

I Hate Everyone But You by Gaby Dunn and Allison Raskin- Two best friends part ways as they head off to college and communicate through texts and emails and share their new experiences. Ava struggles with anxiety and steps out of her shell for new experiences and maybe finding her first boyfriend while Gen explores her sexuality and falls for her TA.

Autoboyography by Christina Lauren- Tanner was an out and proud bi boy until his family moves to Utah. But then his best friend dares him to take a senior seminar class where he must write a book and falls in love with his teacher’s son.

Spinning by Tillie Walder- Walder’s graphic memoir is about her ten years of figure skating and now much she hated it.

Release by Patrick Ness- A guy who is from a strict, religious family examines his past relationship to determine why he why’s unable to reciprocate the love given to him by a sweet guy named Linus and thinks an attachment to a guy who broke is heart might be the problem.

Kaleidoscope Song by Fox Benwell – Two girls, Neo and Tale, living in South Africa meet a bar and bond over the love of music. Possible trigger warning- addresses corrective rape.

Wild Beauty by Anna-Marie McLemore (Oct 3)- You should read all of McLemore’s amazing books, but her newest is about three girl cousins who come from a family who tends to a magical garden. They find themselves falling for the same girl but fear a family curse where everyone they love disappears. Then a boy appears who has no idea who he is and Estrella, one of the cousins, tries to help him discover his identity.

Top Ten by Katie Cotugno (Oct 3)- Two best friends, Gabby and Ryan, are seniors whose platonic relationship becomes complicated as they begin to fall for each other and examine the top moments of their friendship over the past four years.

Not Your Villain by C.B. Lee (Oct 5) – Sequel to Not Your Sidekick. This book revolves are Bells, a trans guy with superpowers (he can shapeshift!) as he teams up with his friends who go on a mission to find the Resistance opposing a corrupt league of superheroes.

Echo After Echo by Amy Rose Capetta (Oct 10) – a girl named Zara wins the role of Echo at the Aurelia theater, but her dream role becomes a nightmare with mysterious deaths, dangerous legends, and an intense director. She finds herself falling for a name named Eli who works in lighting! Theater romance! Everyone who received an ARC of this book has said amazing things about it!

Like Water by Rebecca Podos (Oct 17) - Savannah returns to her small town to care for her father who has Huntington’s disease. She keeps herself occupied with hookups and a job at a waterpark dressed as a mermaid, and finds herself falling for a girl named Leigh. This is Podos’ debute novel and I’m impatiently waiting to read it.

A Line in the Dark by Malinda Lo (Oct 17) – I fell in love with Lo’s novels after reading her queer Cinderella retelling, Ash. She’s written fantasy (Ash and Huntress) and science fiction (Adaption and Inheritance) and now she’s tackling a contemporary thriller . So Jess is secretly in love with her best friend Angie, who is completely oblivious. Angie hooks up a with a girl named Margo, a girl from boarding school whose social circle pulls Jess into some trouble.

Changing Colors by Elyse Springer (Oct 23) – I’m actually going to plug all of Springer’s romance novels because they’re amazing and I’ve read all of them. Changing Colors is the fourth book in her series Seasons of Love. But while you’re at it, you should check out White Out, featuring a gay couple, Thaw, about an ace girl who falls for a model/actress ice queen, Heat Wave, two bisexual girls have a no strings attached relationship and of course one of them develops feelings. There’s also Heels Over Head, which is about an Olympic hopeful diver who falls for one of his teammates.

Girl in a Bad Place by Kaitlin Ward (Oct 31) – Author of Bleeding Earth returns with another creepy tale with queer girls! Okay, so here’s the breakdown of her sophomore novel: So this girl, Cara, finds this commune in the mountains called Haven, and spends a lot of time there. Her best friend,  Mailee, is pretty sure Haven is a cult but of course Cara won’t listen and decides to move in Haven permanently! Sounds like a horrible idea, right?

anonymous asked:

I keep wanting to praise Empress Allura- then i remember how her method of peace was killing the entire galra race [whom we know is not 100% made of evil people See. Marmora] and then had other races that had a fighting spirit put under a will snatching control and basically erasing those whole races like she did with the galra, only this time without killing and instead controlling.

I guess…It’s a little different from the way I personally picture it.

I mean, the empress is most probably dead in that reality and she’s gone for a long time already, so we can’t be sure about when exactly all that mind control system started: before or after her death. The creators didn’t gave us a lot of information about it, unfortunately.
It’s hard for me to imagine her (even if it’s technically not our!Allura) as the person who could enslave whole races by taking their will away. Maybe if she was spoiled with quintessence like Zarkon but this is another story.
My point is that she probably manipulated with people’s minds in particular cases. Her magic powers would allow her to play with other’s memories or force them against their own will. She could do it with some of the empire’s enemies, like, high-ranked soldiers, generals, stubborn rulers, but not with average citizens, ‘cause it’d be exhausting. All of that was her personal choices that could help her to gain alies and “spread peace” without unnecessary losses.
We know that Alteans deeply respect empress Allura (just look at the way Hira talks about her), so maybe after her death they ultimated the idea of “no will - no problem”, so now they use this technology there and there.

What I’m trying to say that.. It’s like… modern Altean politic is a crooked reflection of the empress’s ideas, while her ideas are a crooked reflection of Alfor’s wish about peaceful universe. That’s how a beautiful dream can become a terrible nightmare. At least this is the way I see/headcanon it.

May 2017 Prompts

Write a short story, poem or anything that inspires you based on one of these prompts and tag it with #inkstay.

Prompts of the month
1# - When a witch gets a family visit
2# - What would sirens sing to you?
3# - Describe a radio station no one knows about
4# - Write about hate in less than 15 words
5# - Write about a monster hiding in your backpack
6# - Write about the things you wish you hadn’t said
7# - At what point do dreams become nightmares?
8# - Write something using a quote from the last book you read
9# - If your day was a news story, what would the headline be?
10# - write a poem meant to be heard, rather than just read. (use your accent or your dialect to give one of your works something extra, write in a different language than English, play with sounds, etc.)

Word prompts
1# - coat hanger
2# - gold, paper
3# - screw, wine, road
4# - cold
5# - hour, search
6# - faith, antique, tree
7# - mask
8# - forgery, young
9# - atrocity, dozens, sharp
10# - confrontation, twisted, timid, deep

anonymous asked:

Hallo, if your still taking requests could you do Nyx getting home from work and picking up S/o because hero had a rough day at work. Thankmeow °(´w`)°

Originally posted by vlricnyx

Sometimes Hero’s Have Bad Days | SFW & Fluff | FF15

Tagging randomly (because we love random tagging): @lady-asuka @nykamito @nyxswaifu @waifuthewhite @chocobropuffs @inprotocreed @mistressoli @rubyphilomela @zacklover24 @neko-otaku13 @blondechocobobutt @insomniacapples @insomniasix @cagedbycravings @chocobabyporcelain @mandakatt @valkyrieofardyn


Nyx was expected to always be in the best of moods to always be strong. But there are days when his strength comes crumbling down like a cheap wallet. He was known all through the Glaive as a “Hero” the one to come to when things are looking down and scary.

Big and bad monster?

Nyx.

Over a hundred Nifs to take down?

Nyx.

Rough end of town and the thugs are harming innocents?

Nyx.

Can’t pay the bar tab?

Nyx.

Who did Nyx go to when he has things he couldn’t take on?

When the monsters were ones in his own head. When haunted him at every turn, flashes of memories that he thought were buried deep into the back lots of his mind? Those thoughts about his home and family those he held dear that died. The memories that plagued him not only at night but during the day, flits of day dreams becoming waking nightmares as he lets his mind wander.

A woman walking in the street with hair just like his sister’s making him think of what she would look like now, a painful sting to his heart. A pain that sits deep into his chest sinking down to his stomach making him want to vomit on spot. A laugh of a woman making him think of his mother, the sound like a drug to him as he wanted to hear it again, just to hear his mother’s laughter again. The sweet pain making friends who understand his pain call him a masochist.

Nyx Ulric has one person he can go to in all of EOS that can calm his heart. One person that can make him feel sane again. Bring all the turmoil that boils to the surface even and serene as the morning seas. He turns to the one that captured his heart and held it in their small hands, holding it close to their own heart.

Y/N, one that could make him feel peaceful and loved. A person he could not live without now.

Keep reading

Sleepover - Natasha Romanoff

Originally posted by holy-bucky

Prompt: inspired by Hayley Kiyoko’s song Sleepover.

Warnings: Angst.

( ImagineDaily Masterlist )


“Are you sure about this dress?” Natasha asked, nibbling her bottom lip as she turned slightly to face her reflection in the mirror.

“Of course. I picked this dress thinking of you.” the other woman said quietly, glancing for a moment the redhead before turning around to pick up what she needed to decorate Natasha’s hair.

Natasha hummed satisfied, sitting in the chair facing the dresser and smiling anxiously. “I can’t believe it’s dinner rehearsal already. In a week I’ll be Mrs. Barnes. It’s so strange.”

“Yeah. I never thought you’d marry him.” She murmured softly, trying to hide her own emotion on the subject. Quickly finishing Natasha’s hairstyle, she moved away from the chair to put the things in the bag on the bed. “You’re okay to go. I’m just going to pack my things and meet you there.”

Her heart was heavy on her chest, but she tried her best to sound casual. She thanked mentally for having excellent training in body language, and could at least disguise better what she felt in front of the former assassin. But Natasha as always wouldn’t do what she wanted, approaching quickly and holding one of her hands.

“No. You’re going with me. I need my best friend.” the redhead stated, pulling her by the hand and out of the room.

It was always like this. She would always be there to brush her hair, help to pick out what to wear, do sleepovers all the time. But Natasha would never understand her feelings. She would never read the truth in her eyes. Even when Natasha held her hand, she would always feel alone. She tried to think that she preferred to see Natasha happy, that she shouldn’t be selfish. But was all her suffering worth it? She was tired of having to flee from reality, of having to hide inside her own head. What used to be dreams now have become nightmares. But at least she had Natasha the way she really wanted to. Right? 

She couldn’t cry. She couldn’t tell what she felt. She couldn’t put her own feelings on first. She loved the former assassin, but she wasn’t selfish enough. Natasha already had someone for the role of lover. Natasha was finally really happy. Natasha had chosen her as best friend. And, yes, it broke her heart every time she saw them together. But there was nothing else she could do.

Take a deep breath. She thought to herself, trying not to pay attention to what was happening in the kitchen. Life always full of ironies and she couldn’t believe in her own bad luck. Among thousands of people, why did it have to be her? Unable to restrain herself, she stopped staring at the empty bottle of beer in her hands and looked up at the excited group. The redhead was smiling to the point where her eyes were shining with happiness. Natasha leaned her body against the man with the metal arm as he held her affectionately. It was too much to watch. 

As quiet as possible, she set the empty bottle on the coffee table and rose from the sofa. Throwing her hands into the pockets of her jacket, she didn’t think twice about striding up to the elevator. Her shoulders slumped as the elevator door closed. Staring at the ceiling, she tried to control her uneven breathing. She couldn’t allow her emotions to take over, but with each passing day, it became more difficult. 

The distance from the elevator to her room never seemed so long. It was practically a walk of shame. But she was glad that at least no one was seeing the current state she was in. Finally entering her room, she threw herself on the bed and buried her face in the pillows. But then, to her desperation, the door opened and closed quickly. She heard light footsteps approaching and she didn’t even need to hear the person’s voice to know who it was. Her heart sinking in her stomach.

The mattress beside her sank and soon she heard Natasha’s melodious voice. “Are you okay?”

Without moving any part of her body, she kept her face hidden in the pillows. “I’m just feeling low. I think it was the drinks.”

“Are you sure?” Natasha tried to press, stroking her hair in an attempt to look at her face. “You know you can count on me, right?“

“Yeah, I know.”

An awkward silence took over, making Natasha hesitant for a moment. “I’ll be here whenever you need to. Friends forever, right?”

I can think of something better. She thought bitterly but pushing that feeling aside she grumbled. “Yeah… I think I’m going to sleep. We can talk tomorrow.”

“Sure. Tomorrow then.”

She waited until she was alone again to turn around in her bed. Staring at the ceiling of the dark room, she cried once more until she fell asleep.

Chapter 1: Under Public Scrutiny

A/N: Hello! I just wanted to say thank you for the support of this story and all the new readers that have joined me on this journey! I am quite nervous to post the first chapter so it would mean a lot to me if you could share your thoughts, good or bad! I would greatly appreciate it! Enjoy xo (sorry my tags haven’t been working but oh well! Here you go!)


Three minutes and six seconds.

That is all it takes to change the course of a life, my life.

No matter what people believe about fate I was never one to fall for it. I knew that I could change the course of my future that nothing was set in stone. I could etch and chisel away at the solid foundation and still change it into a beautiful life, one of my own making.

In the attempts of breaking through those confining walls my birth right surrounded me with, I came to the realization that my life would never be normal. That my life would be the center of attention for the whole world to see. To see every faltering step, every mistake, every time I had my heart broken.

This is my life.

Princess Emilia’s life.

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Happy Birthday, piccalily0510!

May 10 - Crack-y and/or smutty TaserTricks fic based off the song “Be My Escape” by Relient K, for @piccalily0510

Written by @amusewithaview

Darcy had never really been one for visual metaphors.  Her dreams were pretty straightforward: a cigar was always an actual cigar, and a penis was a penis (sadly, and strangely, her dreams generally featured more cigars than penises).  In hindsight, she really should have known that something was up when she started dreaming of airy halls and golden-gilt walls.  At first, she thought that she was just reliving her prom.  After all, prom had been held at the nicest hotel in the local area - the golden glow and molded trim decorating literally everything was a bit fancier than she remembered, but not totally out of place.

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