dream. dreams

Did I ever tell y'all that the one time I had a dream where Thomas Sanders and I were friends he was getting interviewed and I was watching from the side of the studio or something where he was being interviewed and then the person interviewing him said

“So what do you have to say about your policy about saying no more than two swear words a day?”

And he just looked so confused because he has no such rule and I burst out laughing and I laughed so hard I was causing a disturbance and had to be escorted out of the studio and as I did Thomas hit me with such a look of betrayal which only made me laugh harder and then I woke up.

I once had a dream that my grandmother was the indisputable, bad-ass Pokemon champion of the Hoenn Region with a team consisting of: Pichu, Weezing, Walrein, Aggron, Blaziken, and Tropius. After I woke up, I commissioned a friend of mine who is an artist to do some drawings of her with her Pokemon, and when she saw them she was so excited and she asked me to print them so she could keep them on her desk as her “Pokemon Champion Certificate”.

2

look at them being all clingy (ꈍᴗꈍ)

A friend recently asked me why I wasn’t sleeping anymore. Every reason that I could think of sounded pathetic, even to me. I couldn’t explain why the thought of sleeping, of dreaming, makes my heart ache, why I instinctively shy away from even thinking about it.

In the end, I gave some blanket excuse about insomnia, though I knew it was only part of the truth. I struggled with it for days; how do I put into words the apprehension sleep invokes in me?

It finally occurred to me today: dreams are fleeting, they end and then you wake up to a reality that is nothing like how you want it to be. Dreams only foster false hope; consciousness is a brutal reminder that my dreams are not real and you are not here.

—  I can always lie to myself while I’m awake.