True healing puts into order the body, mind and spirit with the past, present and future. What kind of agent or method or formula or treatment can help to effect such sweeping, integrated healing? I offer for your consideration ayahuasca, a psychoactive potion indigenous to the Amazon rainforest. Made from the vine Banisteriopsis caapi (called caapi) and the leaf Psychotria viridis, (known as chakruna) ayahuasca is considered among natives in the Amazon to be a sacred plant medicine. Among those for whom the ceremonial healing use of ayahuasca is a way of life, the brew is referred to as “La Medicina,” meaning The Medicine.
“Ayahuasca is not a drug in the Western sense, something you take to get rid of something. Properly used, it opens up parts of yourself that you usually have no access to. The parts of the brain that hold emotional memories come together with those parts that modulate insight and awareness, so you see past experiences in a new way.” -Dr. Gabor Mate
“From experience, I came to learn that ayahuasca bestows upon the user knowledge about a variety of topics, not only consciousness and perception, but also leads one to realize that what we perceive is an illusion.” -Pablo Amaringo
Dean can hear his baby brother’s soft little breaths; can see the steady rise and fall of Sam’s chest, so peaceful and calm. He looks so innocent like this…too bad this is when Dean feels the most vile.
Every night Dean watches Sam sleep, his twisted mind thinking up all sorts of sick scenarios involving the sweet little teen slumbering peacefully beside him.
Dean’s fantasies are nothing short of disturbing…like the thought of what it would feel like to trace the tip of his combat knife down the long, tantalizing curve of Sam’s spine. Would it scare his little brother? Would he tremble at the feeling of cool steel sliding over warm, smooth flesh?
Or would it turn him on? The way the thought of a sharp blade tracing absent-minded patterns across Sam’s lower back turned Dean on. Would Sam cry or would he moan? Would he beg Dean to stop? Or would he egg him on, wanting Dean to keep going; to press harder.
Maybe he’d even let Dean cut him a little? Maybe he’d let Dean smear warm crimson blood across his pretty, seemingly flawless back while he took the hardest fuck of his life.
“Dean? What’s wrong?”
Sam’s voice, raspy and unsure, brought Dean back to reality, and it was only then that he realized he’d just said his little brother’s name aloud…or more accurately, moaned it.
“Nothing. Go back to sleep, little brother,” Dean whispered; his chest heavy with the weight of his shame and his pajama pants soaked through with pre-cum.
With a simple nod, Sam turned his face away from Dean, quickly settling back in.
“You can do it, ya know…I wanna know how it feels too,” Sam mumbled suddenly, his random statement taking Dean by surprise.
“…Do what?” Dean asked nervously, shaky fingers reaching out to touch Sam’s sun kissed skin.
This was dangerous. Dean was dangerous.
“You don’t have to play dumb, big brother,” Sam giggled softly as he leaned back into Dean’s touch. “You kinda talk in your sleep.”
“It’s okay, De…I want it. Please big brother?”
This was a bad situation, and Dean knew it.
Because if he was dangerous with a blade, Sam was downright deadly when he wanted something bad enough.
Night Terrors, Nightmares, Lucid Dreaming, Or Sleep Paralysis?
Do you ever have those dreams that you know you’re dreaming but you can’t seem to wake up?
Well this is my two experiences and they aren’t good ones.
I was 7 or 8 at the time, I lived in this small house and I never felt safe.
Things have happened like doors closing by themselves, voices calling you at night, seeing a small girl go running, or even the feeling of someone tickling your feet at night.
I went to bed at 7PM as I regularly did for school and I remember dreaming that I was in my basement and I had this awful feeling like I was being watched and I knew I was dreaming so I began pinching myself hard but I wouldn’t wake up.
As I slowly walked up the stairs I felt like someone was behind me and I looked back and there it was, the tall black figure with pointy long fingers.
I began screaming and I ran up the stairs and it caught my legs and began dragging me down the stairs and I remember fearing for my life.
I woke up screaming my lungs off and I was sweating so bad, my mom came & held me for an hour as I cried and said I didn’t want to go back to bed.
Second Experience: (2011 maybe 2012)
There I stood, In my high schools hallway. I knew I was dreaming, I had this awful feeling in my stomach & I knew something was immediately wrong.
I began pinching, punching, & even slapping myself but I wouldn’t wake up and I remember all this fear filling me.
I began slowly walking down the hallway and as I reached towards the stairs that led to the lower level the more the fear inside of me increased.
I stopped walking and I couldn’t move, there it was. The thing I had dreamt of before, the tall black figure with long pointy fingers.
I reacted quickly and ran down the stairs, I never looked back and I ran to the schools library. I hid behind the desk where the librarian sat, I began pinching myself again to wake myself up but I still wouldn’t wake up.
I peaked around the corner and the thing came into the library from the other door across the room, I sat there completely still and it was too quiet.
I looked up and there it was, standing behind me. I tried to get up but I ended up falling on my back and I began crawling backwards as it moved slowly towards me.
My arm slipped and I fell so that I was laid down completely on my back, the thing came and bent down and looked me directly in my eyes.
All I remember is its red eyes and that evil smile, it’s finger made its way to my hip and it scratched me and I looked down to see it had scratched an “X” into me.
I suddenly woke up screaming, sweating, shaking & crying.
A small pain filled my hip and I pulled up my shirt and there it was, the “X” the thing scratched onto me.
A few days after that the mark disappeared.
I am Native American so in our culture we believe in Medicine Men & my dad immediately took me to one, they didn’t know what was wrong with me.
Since then I haven’t dreamt of the black figure but I am still terrified that I might see him in my dreams again.
I don’t know what exactly happened but it stays in my mind 24/7.
Christy Turlington: Graduated cum laude in 1999 from the Gallatin School of Individualized Study of New York University, where she earned a Bachelor of Arts degree with a concentration in Comparative Religion and Eastern Philosophy and later continued her studies at the Columbia University Mailman School of Public Health.
Kate Grigorieva: Has a Bachelor’s degree in marketing from the Murmansk State Technical University.
Sasha Pivovarova: Studied art at the St. Petersburg art institute and even hosted her own exhibit in New York City.
Anna Selezneva: Has psychology degree from Moscow State University.
Cindy Crawford: Studied chemical engineering at Northwestern University before dropping out to pursue modeling.
Iman: Studied political science at the University of Nairobi and speaks five languages.
Cameron Russell: Studied economics and political science at Columbia University, graduating with honours.
studied at The Courtauld Institute of Art, which forms part of the University of London and
was awarded a first in her history of art degree.
Joan Smalls: Graduated magna cum laude with a Bachelor’s degree in psychology from InterAmerican University of Puerto Rico.
Amanda Murphy: The American model is also a radiology technologist, who split her time at college between the runway and the hospital but gave up the former for two years of in-hospital training before heading back into the fashion world with Proenza Schouler and Prada exclusives.
Julia Nobis: She began studying a Bachelor of science and applied science through Melbourne’s RMIT while walking for almost every big name in fashion and is currently working towards a postgraduate degree in medicine with dreams of becoming an ER doctor.
After a week-long program at the Harvard Business School, she lelf Victoria’s Secrets and enrolled at the New York University’s Gallatin School. She has also spoken of her love of coding and after attending a two-week course at the Flatiron School donated a scholarship to the school for 20 young women to study coding aptly named Kode with Karlie.
After trading the runway for library, the model’s hard work paid off, graduating from Cambridge University in 2011 with double first class honours in art history.
Lyndsey Scott: Graduated from Amherst College with dual majors in theatre and computer science.
Every night we all become psychotic. You don’t believe me. I’ll prove it.
1) You fall asleep and you start seeing things that are not there. That’s hallucinations.
2) You believe things that are not true. That’s delusions.
3) You become confused about who and where you are. That’s disorientation.
4) You wake up and have little recollection of all of it. That’s amnesia.
Any one of those things when we were awake would be enough to send us to seek psychiatric help. But for reasons we don’t really understand it’s considered normal when we sleep.
Speaker at Grand Rounds on sleep and memory this morning
Hi! My name’s Amy and I’m a new studyblr. I’m a 5′3, 18 year old package full of tea and biscuits from Ireland.
Studyblr helped me through my Leaving Cert and the HPAT, and thanks to the pages and pages of motivational posts and study tips, helped me to get my dream course - Medicine! Now I want to pay on the favours, to share the few nuggets of study wisdom I pick up along the way, in the hopes that I can be even a little bit of a help to other studyblrs. (I’m also hoping that posting on studyblr will help give me a liitle bit more motivation to study)
My goal is to try to get as much of my college notes uploaded on here as possible, just because I found it hard to find a blog that had notes for a lot of the topics we covered this year (as a side note, shout out to @mynotes4usmle for the fantastic summaries and notes - you are a life saver!)
I fall in love with literally every study page I come across, but there a few noteworthy studyblrs that really made me want to start my own blog: