me: i’m not gonna get mad about people not watching the get down

me: *sees everyone nutting over stranger things, riverdale, 13 reasons why, some other random ass show i have zero interest in watching*


me two weeks ago: always sunny is a sitcom about eating cat food and lighting things on fire everyone needs to calm down

me now: Dennis Reynolds, Mac McDonald, and the Epistemology of the Closet: A Critical Analysis of the Structured Binary Opposition Model in “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia”


Do you want to know who ‘Selja’ is? Try to read this post.
Selja is a Korean Sasaeng Fan that caused Ladies Code’s Rice and Eunbi to a severe car accident which leads to the death of the 2 members. She now spread malicious rumors about Bangtan. She’s the reason of the death of ladies code. The Idol Killer Kim Yeoshin 김여신 A girl that have done many things to idols that physically hurt them.
Here are list of things she have done:
Remember the B.A.P stage during the warrior era, Himchan was sweating like crazy? Kim Yeoshin put diarrhea medicine, oil, and benzene in a coffee and gave it to Himchan before the stage.
Kim Yeoshin added glue in Orange Juice and gave it to DBSK UKNOW YUNHO. After that, he had to go to the ER because he had a stomach pump.
She tried giving hydrochloric acid to B1A4 Baro but failed. *Hydrochloric acid can melt the organs in a human body if they drink it wrong.*
She tried giving benzene to Infinite L but failed.
She tried giving Dongwoo from Infinite something weird to eat but failed.
She was a sasaeng fan of Infinite and bothered Dongwoo A LOT when she figured out his phone number.
She did many things to other idols but these are like the highlights…

There is this fortuneteller and she made predictions about the future and it came all true. She made another prediction that in 2014, a really popular idol will die. and the accident of Ladies code occurred..



It is also said by Korean fans that Kim Yeoshin’s next target is…. EXO Sehun.
A lot of Korean EXO stans are aware of this, so a lot of fans are thinking of going to Idol Star Olympic and keep a close eye on Sehun. They are going to scream “DON’T EAT IT!” if anyone try giving Sehun some food. She is the reason of

# WeloveYouJimin because she threatened  Jimin to death.
in which I reply to asks

I have received so many lovely/generous/capslocked asks and messages about the CP bachelor AU, mostly from anons, and rather than filling up everyone’s dash with individual replies I thought I’d do some…paraphrasing.

YES. YES SHE IS. WELL DONE TO ALL OF YOU ANONS WITH EXCELLENT TASTE. I was pleased with the glimpses of jokaste we got in the books but I will seize any excuse to write her myself, as part of my ongoing fight for more ruthless, charming, ambitious masterminds who are women. and I love the idea that under other circumstances she and laurent might have been cautious and terrifying allies, if their interests ever aligned.

I had a dream about this AU!
literally two separate anons have told me this and I think this is amazing. your dreams probably have better plot twists than the actual story. especially the one where damen had to learn japanese for Nebulous Reality TV Reasons. more power to you, collective fandom subconscious.

look, this is a small lifeboat and I can’t save everyone, and my primary interest in every AU I write is keeping nicaise alive so that he and laurent can be snarky BFFs. and aimeric is just so much more useful if you keep his traitorous aspects intact. don’t worry, laurent is gonna have a minor existential moment about this in the next scene. 

oh boy I can’t wait for them to bone down
me neither. me. neither. I don’t know how porny this fic is going to get but rest assured there will be at LEAST some serious kissing.

ok so…damen has a man bun?
yes. it’s super hot. he looks like that guy you run into in woolworths who has clearly just been to the gym and is now shopping for greek yoghurt and could probably bench press your entire weight, and you get so distracted by his arms and his dimples and the little dark wisps of escaping hair in the nape of his neck that you accidentally end up with a trolley full of frozen peas and none of the yoghurt you, personally, were meant to be picking up.

that is a very specific scenario
yes, it is definitely Fiction and in no way based on a real experience.

but what is LAURENT’S hair doing in this universe?
his hair is full of secrets, obviously.

fahye are you just making up questions now

election night in Broken Masquerade
  • <p> <b>me, sitting on my couch watching the election on my favorite unbiased news network of choice:</b> is that a knock at my door I hear<p/><b>me, getting off the couch and answering the door:</b> oh golly sure is awful I have to get off my couch and stop watching the election to answer this door when I could be watching the election and sitting on the couch rather than answering the door, damn shame<p/><b>them:</b> hello, this is Agents ██████ and ████ with the Eastern U.S. Branch of the SCP Foundation, we've been getting high Hume readings within 50 meters of this building and need to ask you a few questions if that's alright with you-<p/><b>reporter on the television:</b> "...and with Trump only five electoral votes away, it looks like we're-"<p/><b>me, immediately turning to the agents:</b> okay it's me, let's go<p/><b>them:</b> ...what<p/><b>me, grabbing my shit to leave:</b> ah yes it's me yes. please take me<p/><b>them:</b> it may be an anomaly in the natural surroundings rather than yourself, please calm down<p/><b>me, walking out the door:</b> let's go<p/><b>them:</b> no ma'am you're not under arrest please just let us ask you a few questions about the high Hume readings<p/><b>me, throwing myself into their arms:</b> let's go<p/><b>them, removing me from themselves:</b> please go back inside and sit down, you are not being detained<p/><b>me, grabbing the Kant counter from their hands and rubbing it all over my body:</b> damn wow that's a high reading! whoo!! I always knew there was something wrong with me, no worries guys I'm not anti-Foundation I support your work I hope the healthcare plan is good for human skips in containment haha am I right lads Ethics Committee 2016<p/><b>them, literally trying to pick me up and put me back in my apartment:</b> um ma'am we can't put you in containment unless you're noticeably anomalous and we've filed paperwork with the UN Human Rights Council<p/><b>me, running very fast down the stairs so that they will feel the need to apprehend me:</b> can't believe I got abducted by the SCP Foundation oh my god never a dull moment in this life am I right?? tell my family I love them lmao!!!<p/><b>them, walking at a normal pace down the stairs:</b> uhhh ma'am please stay here while we call for backup, there is nothing amiss, please remain calm<p/><b>me, forcibly handcuffing myself and locking myself in the back of their van, awaiting the drive to Site-19:</b> please remove me from American society within the next two hours<p/></p>
The Other Side Pt 2  By: Y.Black

After Jon-Jon cleared it, I went into the house and saw I had a couple of missed calls from Twan. I wasted no time hitting him right back.

“Yo Twan you good boy?” My heart started back racing.

“Yeah my nigga, I’m home. I kind of tripping out.”

“Aye my G keep it cool. Blow one or two my nigga. We gotta lay low for a minute.” Deep inside, I felt the same way as bruh. I never pulled a trigger for nothing more than New Year’s, but today I possibly ended a couple nigga’s lives. They say you never know what you may do if put in a situation and this was surly the situation they must have been talking about.

“Aight bruh I’m gonna get it together.” He was still a little shook.

“My nigga do I need to slide by there?”

“Naw, naw I’m good.”

“Aight boy, I love ya… Be easy.”

“Love you too… One.”

I wasn’t sure about letting bruh go like that, but I didn’t want to be on the line too long. I turned on the PS4 and queued up Madden. I really wasn’t into it but I was trying clear my mind. The more the adrenaline wore off the more the reality started to sink in. I knew it was either us or them. But I just watched two of my partners get offed and my junior year hadn’t even started. Shit was crazy, I never imagined this is what the latter part of my school days would become. I hit up Jess, she was my little secret. Everyone knew her for who she was but I knew a different Jess. They saw her as a piece of ass and treated her as such. She would come thru and be down for a gang bang. I never hit though. She was my crush since second grade, but even she didn’t know this much. We were always cool though.

She had a decent upbringing from what I knew. She just was a real dick fiend. When we got to high school I started hearing stories about her in the bathroom or this closet. At first I thought it was just rumors from chicks around school. When she came through for one of the boys in the clique. I kind of hung my head when I saw her face, she saw me and didn’t even flinch. I charged it to the game and kept it moving. When they tried to pass her my way, I told them I was straight. Of course Twan clowned the fuck out of me for but I didn’t care. I never asked her what she did, nor did she ever tell me what was up. We let our one on one smokes session be about venting and just vibing. Apart of me still adored her, but the stigma could never let me be with her. She was deemed a hoe and that shit was a no-no. The whole crew had this “smash and pass” motto.

After two quarters of Madden I needed something else. I needed comfort, I didn’t know it at the time but I text her.

Me: Jess wyd

Jess:  Shit nothing

Me: you wanna burn summin

Jess: You know I’m down

Me: Bet slide on me

Jess: OMW be there in 15

Me: Bet

Like clockwork I heard when she pulled up in her little Civic Coupe. I made my way to the door and she met me there. She knew something was up, her face said it all. She questioned me right out the gate. I didn’t cave, just told her I wanted to see her and smoke something. She let me ride, but gave me a look like this is not over nigga. She breezed pass me and headed to the back door. We usually rolled and smoked out back out of respect for moms but she was in Orlando with some nigga for the weekend. I can’t front looking back at it now she needed that time desperately. But I grabbed Jess by the hand and we headed down the adjacent hall way to my room.  She had only been there once before, so she looked around learning my space as I slung a book on my bed and grabbed my personal stash. She plopped down on the bed as well as I turned around. She was gorgeous to me, she reminded me of the girl that used to play on “In the House” back in the day. A chocolate something skin smooth as could be. I didn’t understand her lifestyle or choices, but none the less she was my homie.

She gave me the dry run down of what was new and how she had enough of lame ass niggas. She actually said she was going to chill out for a little while. My eyebrows went up as I was finishing the spliff. I was a bit skeptical but I mean hey that’s what she was claiming. I handed her the J and lighter.  I went to crack the window.

“So, what’s making you chill out?”

“I don’t know, I just want more for me you know.”

“I guess.”

“I just want to love on someone and they love me back.” She was speaking some real shit. I was like I’ve been loving you since elementary little do you know. I didn’t tell her but that was my thoughts. I could never tell her how I felt inside. That would go against the codes of dealing with hoes. Hell I was already in violation of the rules I was schooled on.  The lighter being lit broke my train of thought. I looked over at her as she pulled hard and inhaled. One day I wondered if I will tell her how I’ve felt. She put the loud in rotation, I hit it and laid back in her lap. Initially I could tell she was shocked but she just started rubbing my waves. I hit it one more time and passed it back.

“You hear what happened to Trav and Jermaine?”

I was quiet, she had no clue this is why she was here. I tried to fight back the tears back but I couldn’t. As I inhaled the blunt the tears fell down into my ears as I was looking up into her gorgeous eyes from her lap. She knew I knew. “Shit happened so fast Jess.” That was all I could say. My throat locked up and I couldn’t say anything else. Only the tears flowed. She leaned down putting her forehead on mine.

“Caleb its ok. I’m here for you and always will be.” She kissed my lips gently but I felt it in my toes. She hadn’t called me Caleb since at least 5th grade.  Her lips felt so good I was lost for a minute.  It was only when she broke the kiss did it really sink in and I was left in a haze of weed smoke. I hit the J before handing it over. This was the realest moment of my day. Everything hadn’t settled and it all felt like a movie. She bought the real back for me. Never had I felt like this. My extent of feelings with women was honesty I want to get this nut and I will check you later. But this was, this was far from that. I had no clue what this was. I sat up not knowing how to process shit, and kind of cutting my eye at her to peep her reaction. She was cool though, meanwhile my emotions and thoughts were all over. “You ok Caleb.”

“Yeah , I’m…. I’m ok. Just a lot shit on my mind right now.”

“I know that’s why I’m here right?”


“So, are going to talk? Or are we just smoking and vibin’?”

“We vinbin’ Jess.” I laid back in her lap and we killed the first J and lit the second. Ten minutes must have went by we just sat there in silence; only with a few glances at each other. “Jess why are we here?”

“Huh? Awww you getting all philosophical on me while you high and shit?” she knew I turned into Dr. Cornel West when I was zooted.

“No for real like what is my purpose?”

“Well I don’t know. I never thought about it you know.”

“Like what if we didn’t meet in second grade? Like what if I never stole your Luchable and you didn’t chase me down the hall? Like would I be laying in your lap if this never happened?”

“Damn C you right. Like where would I be if that hadn’t happened?” she was really in thought now. “Like would we still have become friends, would you even know my name?”

“Everything happens by chance Jess.”

“Damn that’s deep.”

The room feel back silent as the bud was about done. I got up and headed to the kitchen and left her in my room. I grabbed a water for me and a soda for her. I also snagged a Lunchable for us to share, ever since that day I stole hers I always kept a couple on deck. When I came back she was under my covers. I hesitated slightly but continued on. I put all my music on shuffle on my laptop, and crack opened the snack, it was the nacho kind. I dipped a chip in both sauces and showed it to her, as in to say do you want some. She sat up and revealed her perky tatas. I was surprised but not overwhelmingly so. I said nothing just fed her the nacho as she leaned in. I handed her the soda and we sat and reminisced about elementary as we killed the Lunchable.

“Come lay with me.” She told as I sat the empty package on the desk next to the laptop. I walked over and started pulling the cover back and she snatched it from me. “No, get naked. I want to feel your skin on mine.”

“Man I don’t know about all that.” I protested.

“Boy it ain’t even like that. Bring yo ass.” She laughed and I chuckled I took everything but my boxers off. And I hesitated again.

“Those too nigga, look I’ll even turn away.” She rolled and turned her back to me. It was even about that though. It was the feeling that I’d felt for so long. She was playing with fire, but she came over for me no questions asked the leady I could do was meet her half way right? I slid my boxers off and slid under the cover. “See that’s not so bad.” She said looking over her shoulder. “Now come spoon me.”

“What? All these demands. I don’t even know what that means.”

“Man, come scoot up on my body nigga, so I can feel you and you feel me.”

“Man……” I reluctantly did it. It was weird, but not like a bad weird I guess just different. Never had I had time spent like this with a female like this. I liked it though. She confessed she never spent time like this with anyone either. I told her the same as we talked until we drifted off. I never knew a comfort like this. But in my head I knew I couldn’t get used to this so this was going to be a onetime deal.

I woke up around 9a.m. alone in my bed. I sat up looking for Jess and peered out of the window her car was gone. I reached for my phone and I had couple of notifications. Nothing important though. As I was putting my phone down it went off again. I looked at it.

Jess: Hey Good Morning I had to take off I didn’t want to leave like I did but you were sleep and I had to get home so my mom didn’t trip  

Jess: Thank you so much for last night. I know I came over there to be there for you but you were just as much there for me as I was for you. Thank you friend.