double chocolate chip cookie recipe

anonymous asked:

Dude what's the best thing bitty ever baked?

you honestly don’t understand how, like, literally? that question is im-freaking-possible to answer.

one time though, my frosh year? bits made these things. if you know what slutty brownies are, they were that. but shitty has this moral opposition to the word ‘slut’, so we called them ‘promiscuous girls’, after that nelly furtado song that came out in ‘06.

anyways. these things are bitty’s double fudge brownies, stuffed with his great-great-great-great grandma’s chocolate chip pecan cookie recipe and double-stuf oreos. and then on top, he puts a fucking layer of marshmallows. he also made hot fudge.

so imagine every orgasm you’ve ever had, in combination with when you finally pop your back, taking off formalwear, finally taking a shit, and, like, scratching an itch after like an hour, then multiply the satisfaction you get from any of those things by maybe ten, possibly twenty.

i’m a grown ass man and i am not ashamed to say that i had a straight up boner while i ate that. i was turned on. if jack’s giant crush on him hadn’t been supes obvi, i probably would’ve seriously asked if i could eat him out to thank him. i was sexually attracted to him.

that’s how good they were.