dont think i can handle it

  • what she says: I'm okay
  • what she means: Can I say my shit? Can I say my shit? I've got lots of shit to say. I've got lots of shit to say. I can't fit my hand inside a Pringle can, I have a huge amount of trouble fitting my hand inside of a Pringle can. I can get my hand like four inches into the can but then I have to tilt the can into my mouth but then a bunch of crumbs have accumulated at the bottom of the can so they all go spilling onto my face. What I'm trying to say is the diameter of Pringle cans is way too small. I'll say it again. The diameter of Pringle cans is way too small. Two radiuses of a Pringle can is way too small. If you feel me, put your hands up, Come on! If you feel me, put your hands up! Look at all these hands that are way too big to fit inside of a Pringle can! Your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can, your hands are too big to fit inside a Pringle can. You think you can, I know you can't, you think you can. Pringles! Listen to the people, I am sure ninety percent of the complaint letters you get are about the width of your cans?! Just... make them wider?! I've overdone the Pringles thing, sorry. I want to have a daughter. I want to have a daughter so I can finally have someone around the house who can fit their hands in the Pringle can. Yes, I'm still on the Pringle cans thing! Yeah! I'll move on, alright? But that is priority número uno. I don't go to the gym because I'm self-conscious about my body but I'm self-conscious about my body cause I don't go to the gym. Irony can be so painful. That's a Catch-22. Let's do this! I went to Chipotle, I went to Chipotle, got myself a chicken burrito. I went down the line and I got all these ingredients and at the end of the line the guy tried to wrap the burrito but half of the shit inside the burrito spilled out. He still wrapped it. I was like, dude you should have warned me! You're a burrito expert, you should have told me halfway through: "Hey, man. You might be reaching maximum burrito capacity here" Do you fucking think I want a messy burrito? No one wants a messy burrito! The whole appeal of the burrito is that all of the ingredients are contained within the confines of the tortilla. I wouldn't have gotten half of the shit if I knew it wasn't gonna fit in the burrito! Alright? Look I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew it wouldn't fit! I wouldn't have got half of it! Like, I'm okay with small mistakes, if you've got no more chicken I'll take pork. But I'll blow my dad before I eat a burrito with a fork. I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit. Man, I wouldn't have got half of it, like half of it, like, half of it, like, half of it, like half of it right now,I think it's time I think it's time, I think that we break this down. I can sit here and pretend like my biggest problems are pringle cans, and burritos. The truth is, my biggest problem's you. I want to please you but I want to stay true to myself. I want to give you the night out that you deserve but I want to say what I think and not care what you think about it. Part of me loves you, part of me hates you, part of me needs you, part of me fears you. And I don't think that I can handle this right now, handle this right now. I don't think that I can handle this right now. I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now. Look at them, they're just staring at me like, "come and watch the skinny kid with a steadily declining mental health and laugh as he attempts to give you what he cannot give himself." I don't think that I can handle this right now, I don't think that I can handle this right now. They don't even know the half of this right now, they don't even know the half of it. But I know I'm not a doctor, I'm a pussy, I put on a silly show so I should probably just shut up and do my job so here I go. I wouldn't have got the lettuce if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the cheese if I knew it wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got the peppers if I knew they wouldn't fit, I wouldn't have got half. You can tell them anything if you just make it funny, make it rhyme and if they still don't understand you then you run it one more time. I don't think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) I don't think that I can handle this right now (Hoo!) If you think that I can handle this right now (Haa!) Right now (Haa!) Now, handle this right, handle this right, handle this right now.Thank you, good night! I hope you're happy.

The Sunshine Club™ is a network that mainly aims to promote positivity, self-love, and equality where you can share your love for animals, plants, art, poetry, and literally whatever the heck you want. You can ask for advices, develop friendships, and relationships with people from all over the world! This network will most likely be facebook-based (I will create a facebook group) so please before entering the club, make sure to have an fb account!

🌻rules:

  • follow me: peachisty (we prolly have similar content anyway)
  • reblog this post (u can rebloop it more than once)
  • like is only for bookmarking
  • fill out this survey form
  • track/follow the tag #sunshineclub

🌻 additional chances:

  • fill out the survey form with 100% of ur heart
  • send me cute asks maybe??
  • rebloop some of my stuff maybe???
  • befriend me maybe???

🌻 things to expect on The Sunshine Club™

  • friendships! new pals with similar interests
  • positivity because that is the main goal of this club
  • the buddy project: every week you will be paired with a different member of the club that you have to befriend and converse with!
  • share your stuff: may it be art, your doggos, cats, pets, selfies, your works, stories, etc! every day, we will be sharing some of our stuff depending on the theme
  • help, advice (fashion, life, love)
  • place to grow because together we will aim to become better versions of ourselves and learn new things: culture, good stuff, music, language, learning styles etc!!
  • group of nice ppl who may follow you!
  • people who can rebloop/like your stuff under the tag that is: #sunshineclub
  • people who can do q4qs, reblog your stuff, send u messages, be ur #1 fan, etc

🌻 things to remember:

  • this network is created for positivity and love! strictly no trolls, rude people around!
  • if you’re just joining this club because you want followers… please… don’t. :(
  • this is the first time I’m doing this so please don’t expect too much! i will try my very best to keep this together tho!
  • pease make sure to have a facebook account before joining the club

🌻 other notes:

  • i will be choosing the members once this post gets a legit amount of entries or notes!
  • announcement of members will be on a separate post
  • most likely gunna rebloop this with the deadline some time soon (im still uncertain)
  • will only be picking max 20 bc i don’t think i  can handle so many ppl
  • i will add more ppl over time so yeppo, dont you worry this is 100% open to everyone but im just trying my best to keep it a little controlled right now wohoo
yesterdays jam

here it is, the it crowd au that no-one asked for. cheers @jiilys and @bantasticbeasts for being legends


Remus Lupin to Lily Evans: so

Lily Evans: so

Remus Lupin: first day

Lily Evans: ya

Remus Lupin: scary

Lily Evans: mmhmm

Remus Lupin: dont be scared

Lily Evans: im not really

Remus Lupin: u should be

Lily Evans: actually now that you mention it i am kind of scared

Remus Lupin: WELL DONT BE

Lily Evans: MAKE UP UR MIND

Lily Evans: god

Lily Evans: its like having a conversation with my anxiety

Remus Lupin: dont make me fire you on your first day here

Lily Evans: pls dont

Remus Lupin: i wont

Remus Lupin: so

Remus Lupin: im putting you in i.t

Remus Lupin: bc u said on ur cv that u have a lot of experience with computers

Lily Evans: u didnt


Remus Lupin to Lily Evans: do u actually /have/ any experience with computers??

Lily Evans: emails?? n stuff

Remus Lupin: “”””emails?? n stuff”””””??

Lily Evans: ya

Lily Evans: sending emails

Lily Evans: receiving emails

Lily Evans: deleting emails

Lily Evans: i could go on

Remus Lupin: do

Lily Evans: the web

Lily Evans: using the mouse

Lily Evans: mice

Lily Evans: using mice

Lily Evans: clicking

Lily Evans: double clicking

Lily Evans: the computer screen ofc

Remus Lupin: ofc

Lily Evans: the keyboard

Lily Evans: the bit that goes on the floor

Remus Lupin: do u mean the hard drive??

Lily Evans: correct

Remus Lupin: well

Remus Lupin: u certainly seem to kno ur stuff

Lily Evans: shut up

Remus Lupin: come on lil,,,they need a new manager

Lily Evans: dont

Remus Lupin: just take the job lil

Lily Evans: ok


Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: so,,,,the people ill be working with what r they like

Remus Lupin: quite literally the worst idiots i have ever met

Lily Evans: excellent


Marlene McKinnon to James Potter: jim

James Potter: have u tried turning it off and on again

Marlene McKinnon: um

James Potter: nice talking to you mckinnon


James Potter to Sirius Black: hey can u answer the phone

Sirius Black: i could but i dont want to

James Potter: and u wonder why no-one ever comes down here

Sirius Black: probably got something to do with that 3 day old coffee stain down ur shirt

James Potter: I TOLD U ALL MY OTHER SHIRTS ARE IN THE WASH


Mary MacDonald to Sirius Black: can u help me

Sirius Black: what with

Mary MacDonald: my computers not working

Sirius Black: have u tried turning it off and on again

Mary MacDonald: yea

Sirius Black: u kno the button on the side

Mary MacDonald: yea

Sirius Black: is it glowing??

Mary MacDonald:

Sirius Black: u need to turn it on mare

Mary MacDonald: ok hang on

Mary MacDonald: how do i do that

Sirius Black: ?? the button turns it on

Mary MacDonald:

Sirius Black: ?? u do kno how a button works dont u

Sirius Black: and if u say on clothes i am going to come up there and personally murder you

Mary MacDonald: I’d like to see you try


Andromeda Black to James Potter: Hey James.

James Potter: andy!!

Andromeda Black: Don’t call me that.

James Potter: sorry

Andromeda Black: It’s OK.

Andromeda Black: I’m having some trouble with my computer.

James Potter: wouldnt u rather talk to ur cousin abt this

Andromeda Black: I could, but I don’t want to.

James Potter: u two r more alike than u know

Andromeda Black: Shut up.

James Potter: absolutely

James Potter: so what seems to be the problem

Andromeda Black: It’s not working.

James Potter: i see

James Potter: have u tried forcing an unexpected reboot??

Andromeda Black: No, let me try.

Andromeda Black: How will that help?

James Potter: well

James Potter: the driver hooks the function by patching the system call table

James Potter: and its not safe to unload it unless another thread’s abt to jump in there and do its stuff

James Potter: and u don’t want to end up in the middle of invalid memory

James Potter: hello

James Potter: andy

James Potter: uve gone havent u


James Potter to Sirius Black: i think i just managed to successfully piss of your cousin again

Sirius Black: what else is knew


Sirius Black to Mary MacDonald: u couldnt handle all this

Mary MacDonald: i could take u any day of the week black

Sirius Black: is that so

Mary MacDonald: yes

Sirius Black: really

Mary MacDonald: stop it

Sirius Black: wow

Mary MacDonald: shut up

Sirius Black: why dont u come down here and make me

Mary MacDonald: what happened to ‘you couldn’t handle all this’

Sirius Black: u think im afraid of you??

Mary MacDonald: yes

Mary MacDonald: my brand new louboutins came in the mail next week and i know exactly the right place to stick them

Sirius Black: IM NOT AFRAID OF YOU

Sirius Black: U CAN COME DOWN HERE ANY TIME AND ILL BE WAITING FOR YOU


Sirius Black to James Potter: that told her

James Potter: can u stop fighting with mary all the time ur clogging the chat rooms


Sirius Black to James Potter: honestly its about time u got back

Sirius Black: its been all ruddy go here

James Potter: really

James Potter: how many jobs have you had

Sirius Black: one


James Potter to Sirius Black: what was the job

Sirius Black: girl on fifth

James Potter: did u hit it off

Sirius Black: define “”””hit it of”””””

James Potter: did she continue to talk to u once u’d fixed her computer

Sirius Black: she gave me her number

James Potter: r u gonna call her

Sirius Black: ?? no

James Potter: so ur just gonna toss it away

James Potter: like yesterday’s jam

Sirius Black: p much yeah

Sirius Black: and i told u to stop using that analogy

Sirius Black: jam lasts for ages


Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: u have unisex toilets??

Remus Lupin: yea

Remus Lupin: for non-binary pals

Remus Lupin: and for people having affairs

Lily Evans: i see


Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: the view up here is amazing

Remus Lupin: yep

Remus Lupin: have u found the elevators yet

Lily Evans: um

Lily Evans: yea

Lily Evans: which floor am i on

Remus Lupin: ur all the way down in the basement

Lily Evans: wait what

Lily Evans: remus

Lily Evans: ur joking arent u

Lily Evans: remus

Lily Evans: remus

Lily Evans: i know ur getting these


Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: remus

Lily Evans: the lift gets stuck halfway down

Lily Evans: and the hallway is full of maintenance stuff

Lily Evans: its disgusting

Lily Evans: i think i saw a rat


Lily Evans to Remus Lupin: ITS EVEN WORSE DOWN HERE

Lily Evans: IM READING A MAGAZINE FROM 1994

Lily Evans: WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO


James Potter to Sirius Black: theres a girl outside

Sirius Black: who is she

James Potter: i have no idea

James Potter: i cant go out there sirius

James Potter: i havent washed this shirt in three days and i forgot to put on deodorant this morning

James Potter: i havent even flossed

Sirius Black: who even flosses these days

James Potter: i do

Sirius Black: right

Sirius Black: bc ur a twat

James Potter: a twat who doesnt have gingivitis

Sirius Black: shut up

James Potter: u shut up

James Potter: one of us has to go out there

Sirius Black: u do it


Marlene McKinnon to Lily Evans: everything going ok??

Lily Evans: legit they both just walked out

Lily Evans: one of them was talkin abt tolstoy

Lily Evans: the other one was like “””james shut up u’ve literally never read a book in my life”””

Marlene McKinnon: thats sirius

Marlene McKinnon: he’s my favourite

Lily Evans: then james tried to lean on his chair and slipped over

Lily Evans: he stood up and he was like “”””plenty of people come down here to visit””””

Lily Evans: sirius was like “”””who, jim??? who comes down here???? what people????””””””

Lily Evans: james threw something at him and sirius was like “””””why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up????”””””

Lily Evans: then james was like “””what can we do you for??””””

Marlene McKinnon: cringe

Lily Evans: so i told them

Lily Evans: and bolted

Marlene McKinnon: what r u doing now

Lily Evans: im hiding in my office

Marlene McKinnon: smooth


James Potter to Sirius Black: I AM THE HEAD OF THIS DEPARTMENT

Sirius Black: i thought i was

James Potter: WELL ITS ONE OF US

James Potter: ITS CERTAINLY NOT HER

James Potter: IM GOING TO GO SORT THIS OUT


James Potter to Lily Evans: i dont mean to be rude or anything but i was not informed of any changes happening to this department

Lily Evans: did they not tell you about me??

James Potter: no sir

James Potter: and for what its worth we dont need you down here

James Potter: were perfectly capable of taking care of ourselves

Lily Evans: sure

Lily Evans: you do realise you’re wearing a shirt with a coffee stain down it that looks like hasn’t been washed in weeks


James Potter to Sirius Black: IM SORRY BUT IM NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO DEAL WITH THAT WOMAN

Sirius Black: as opposed to all the other women ur able to charm over effortlessly

James Potter: im never speaking to you again

Sirius Black: dw ill deal with her


Sirius Black to Lily Evans: sounds like ur having a v important conversation there

Lily Evans: i am

Sirius Black: also

Sirius Black: just a thought

Sirius Black: do you want me to connect up your phone??

Lily Evans: bitch


Sirius Black to James Potter: she just kicked me out of her office

James Potter: serves u right

Sirius Black: u dont even know what i did

James Potter: dont have to


Sirius Black to James Potter: so basically i went in and she was “””””pretending”””””” to talk to remus

James Potter: really??

Sirius Black: really

James Potter: shes a little bit weird

Sirius Black: i just saw you spraying yourself with cold water bc u said u had “”””””a hot ear””””””

James Potter: ITS A PART OF THAT SPORTING INJURY I GOT LAST SUMMER WHAT DO U WANT FROM ME


James Potter: i cant believe she didnt even get excited when she saw the original zx 81 we have in the doorway

Sirius Black:

Sirius Black: yea, that WAS weird

Sirius Black: totally uncalled for

Sirius Black: its almost as if she doesnt know anything about computers

Sirius Black: james??

Sirius Black: james???

Sirius Black: uve dropped ur phone havent u


Lily Evans to Sirius Black: why is he screaming

Sirius Black: i told him u didnt know anything about computers and he spilt his tea all over himself

Lily Evans: jesus

Sirius Black: yea

Sirius Black: thats why he always makes two cups of tea

Lily Evans: just in case he accidentally drops the first one??

Sirius Black: yea

Lily Evans: wow


James Potter to Sirius Black: she has to go

Sirius Black: why

James Potter: heres the plan

Sirius Black: ooh ooh hang on let me sit down first

Sirius Black: ok go

James Potter: so well go in

Sirius Black: when

James Potter: in like a minute

Sirius Black: will that be enough time for me to get to know the plan??

James Potter: yknow i shouldnt have used the world plan

James Potter: ive clearly got u overexcited

Sirius Black: would “”””scheme””””” be a better word

Sirius Black: actually no thats just as exciting

James Potter: look all i was gonna say was is that we go in, i make up a load of bullocks about computers and well see if she picks up on it

Sirius Black: yea i can see why u didnt want to use the word plan

James Potter: just let me do the talking

Sirius Black: r u sure thats a good idea

James Potter: shut up


James Potter to Sirius Black: we need to get this right

James Potter: we cannot go there in half-cocked


Lily Evans to Marlene McKinnon: i can hear them outside the door

Lily Evans: theyr just,,,,gigglin


James Potter to Sirius Black: i think that went well

Sirius Black: she was pretending to send an email to lupin and you asked her if she wanted you to connect her up to the matrix

James Potter: genius

Sirius Black: and she looked at you and was like “””””u just made all that up””””

Sirius Black: then u lost ur shit and start screaming at her

Sirius Black: at which point she stood up and starting screaming at you

Sirius Black: and u stormed out

Sirius Black: what part of that screams “”””that went well””””??


Sirius Black to Lily Evans: hey do u want me to connect up your computer??

Lily Evans: fuck off


Lily Evans to EVANS KNOWS NOTHING ABOUT COMPUTERS: i cant believe ur going to tell on me

Lily Evans: ur like a pair of horrible old men

Sirius Black: what did she say

James Potter: she said were like a pair of “”””horrible old men””””

Sirius Black: SHE DIDNT


Remus Lupin to horrible old men ft lily evans: so what did u want to tell me

James Potter: well, its like this

Remus Lupin: im so proud of u guys

Remus Lupin: my i.t team

Remus Lupin: team players

Remus Lupin: every single one of you

Remus Lupin: theres no room for people who can’t act as a team in my team

Remus Lupin: u know what happens to people who cant act as a team in my team??

James Potter: what

Remus Lupin: i get security to escort them from the building

Remus Lupin: and if the security team cant escort them from the building as a team, then i fire them too

Remus Lupin: then i call recruitment and get them to look for a security team that can work as a team

Remus Lupin: then i warn them that they may have to escort the current security team from the building

Sirius Black: does this happen often to you then

Remus Lupin: anyway

Remus Lupin: what did u want to tell me

James Potter: well its just not working out

Lily Evans: HAHAHAHAHAHA

Lily Evans: hes joking

Remus Lupin: what do u mean,,,,”””not working out””””??

Lily Evans: ITS NOTHING

Lily Evans: WE ARE GETTING ON A LIKE A BIG HOUSE ON FIRE

Remus Lupin: then why did u text me

James Potter: um

Sirius Black: we installed a voice activation system on your computer

Sirius Black: it might take a while to get the pitch right but but nonetheless

Sirius Black: go ahead

Remus Lupin: wow

Remus Lupin: how exciting

Lily Evans: thats all then

Lily Evans: talk to you later


James Potter to nice save sirius: WHAT GOOD R U

James Potter: U OBVIOUSLY DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT COMPUTERS

Lily Evans: no,,,,but i can learn

Lily Evans: for example sirius,,,,,u can walk me thru what ur doing right now

Sirius Black: ;)))))))) id be delighted

Sirius Black: im just working on a very simple piece of programming software

Lily Evans: on seconds thoughts i am very busy and have better things to be doing with my time thanks bye


Mary MacDonald to Sirius Black: i hope ur ready for me bitch


Lily Evans to Sirius Black: hows your arm

Sirius Black: i never knew louboutins could hurt that much

Lily Evans: yeah

Lily Evans: imagine

Lily Evans: if i hadnt stepped in and asked her out to lunch u’d be nothing more than a pile of fabulous hair right now

Sirius Black: i owe you one evans

Lily Evans: damn right u do


Remus Lupin to FUCKHEADS GALORE: i just spent the last five hours screaming at my computer for nothing

Remus Lupin: do any of u have anything to say for yourselves

Lily Evans: have u tried turning it off and on again??

Got7 Reaction to You Understanding a Dirty Pick-up Line in Korean.

A/N: Everything in Italics are what would be said in Korean, since I don’t actually know the language (but I do know how to say “Furniture,” “Road,” and “Hi,” so I’d say I’m pretty advanced). But for most of them, it is assumed you already know Korean, so I changed it just a bit for the plot to make more sense!

JB:

Girl do you have a shovel in that back pocket? ‘Cause I’m digging that ass.” He would say from behind you as you walked slightly ahead of him. Little did he know, you knew exactly what he said, so when you clapped back with: “If I had a shovel, I’d be hitting you with it right now,” he would be a little startled and only a tad embarrassed, and he would try to play it off by avoiding direct eye contact.

Mark:

You know, Y/N… Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.” Mark said to you, thinking you wouldn’t understand so he could play it off as a prank. When your jaw dropped, he immediately knew he was in trouble. You slapped him on the shoulder playfully and replied, trying to be as intimidating as possible: “What’s your first favorite, Mark?” He knew not to answer that, though, and just gave you a giggle along with a shrug of his shoulders.

Jackson:

By this point, Jackson knew that you could speak Korean, but now he would just tell you dirty pick up lines to annoy you, if anything. You would be going over what you would be getting at the store later on that day, when Jackson interrupts you: “You know what’s on my list of things to do today?” He paused and raised his eyebrows. “You, Jagi.” You rolled your eyes and continued, like he never said anything.

Jinyoung:

While at a practice with the boys, you would normally sit in a chair towards the back of the studio so you dont interfere with anything going on. During break, the seven of them were huddled together whispering to eachother, but you didn’t think anything of it until Jinyoung came walking up to you with a smirk, trying his hardest not to laugh. “I just wanted to say that they call my dick ‘The Truth’ because most girls can’t handle it…but I bet you can.” This was obviously a prank, because he knew you could understand Korean, so quickly, you responded: “Sorry, Jinyoung, you can’t handle what you cant see!” This immediately caused fits of laughter from the rest of the boys and even Jinyoung, who wasn’t expecting such a good comeback.

Youngjae:

Normally, Youngjae wouldn’t even say things like this seriously. He would mostly tell you super cringey pick up lines to annoy you, but in all reality, you both would just laugh at it. Most of the humor would come from the fact that he rarely says these things, so when he interrupted your casual conversation to say “So, what are you doing tonight besides me?” You both would erupt into laughter and probably exchange a couple more bad pick up lines before continuing on to other topics of conversation.

BamBam:

I honestly believe Bam would be blatantly obvious in this situation. Knowing fully well that you can speak Korean, you to would be talking and when there would be a lag in the conversation, he would say: “Hey, Y/N, smile if you want to have sex with me.” You would try your best to hold back a smile, since what he said was so unexpected. He held a grin the whole time, but when you playfully stated “I never smile around you.” He made an exaggerated sad face, but then made it an effort to try and make you smile, to which he obviously won.

Yugyeom:

I’m no weatherman, but you can expect a few inches tonight.” Yugyeom would say quietly, looking at you with an exaggerated smirk after looking away from the television in a lobby you were sitting in. He knew you could understand him, and you figured he was just saying this to make you laugh, so of course you had to, but didn’t respond just in case people around you could hear you. You simply slapped his leg playfully while turning away to giggle at how unexpected his statement was.

Christine and Chloe eventually convince Michael to tell Jeremy how he feels
Michael decides to do it over text since he doesn’t think he could handle doing it in person

Michael: Hey Jeremy can we talk? 
Jeremy: sure whats up
Michael: This is gonna be hard for me to say but
Jeremy: hey its ok take your time
Michel: I have a huge crush on you and I’ve had it for a few years now.  Sorry.
Jeremy: shit im sorry michael but I dont feel the same im sorry
Michael: Oh right yeah sorry dude didn’t mean to make this awkward haha
Jeremy: you ok
Michael: I’m sure I’ll be fine 

Michael’s crying at this point 
Both Chloe and Christine had convinced him to tell Jeremy because they thought he felt the same
But obviously, they were wrong
Of course they were
Why would anyone like Michael
He was annoying
Loud
Stupid
A loser 
A stoner
And to top it all off now he didn’t even have a best friend 

When Michael tells her, Chloe is all ready to fight Jeremy but Michael tells her to let it go
Over time the group splits
With Michael, Brooke, Chloe, Jenna and Christine in one grou[
And Jeremy, Rich and Jake in the other
Over time the two sides of the group lose most contact
Though Chloe and Jake still talk from time to time 

In his second year of college, Jeremy works out that he is definitely bi after a few nights at a club 
In his last year of college, Jeremy realises that he was actually in love with Michael 
But it’s too late to do anything about that 

Chloe invites both sides of the group to her and Brooke’s wedding  
Everyone shows
Except Jeremy
Michael tries not to let it get to him
But it does
He’s just so angry that Jeremy allowed all of this to become so awkward between them
They were meant to be a team
Player 1 and Player 2
Who cares if it’s platonic or romantic?
He just wants his best friend back

Rich and Jake’s wedding? No Jeremy 

When Brooke has her first kid? No Jeremy 

When Jenna gets promoted to head of her newspaper? No Jeremy 

When Michael is half asleep on his sofa with a glass of wine in his hand after looking after Christine Lohst all day? Of course that’s when he shows up 

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK 
Ugh they’re gonna start to shout soon
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Oh hell yeah I’ll open it soon
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
It sucks Chlo left me here alone
KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK
Here in this toddler’s battle zone
CLANG CLANG CLANG CLANG
I feel a headache coming up
BANG BANG BANG BANG
Is Chloe ever giving up?
Splash splash splash splash
Throw some water in my face
Now I’m in a better place I open up the door and - 

“JeReMy!" 
"MiChAeL!”
“Wait why are you surprised? This is my house”
“Christine said it was he- oh shit”
“Christine said what?”
“NOTHING”
“You’re a terrible liar Jeremy”
“But she didn’t say ANYTHING”
Michael raises an eyebrow
“Really?”
“Ok fine well she may have told me that this was her new apartment and so I was stopping in to visit her like I usually do”
“…you usually visit Christine?”
“…yeah”
“So are you two…”
“NO NO NO she’s not my type”
“Oh”
“Yeah”
“Why are you still here Jeremy? Christine’s not here.  Unless you wanted lil Christine in which case she’s sleeping in the guest room”
“Right yeah sorry.  I’m bothering you aren’-”
“You’re no-”
“I’ll jus-”
“You don’t ha-”
“By-”
“COME IN FOR A DRINK”
“Uh what?”
“Would you like to come in for a drink?”
“Oh I…”
“You don’t have to Jeremy, it was just an idea”
“No it’s ok I’ll come in”

Michael finds another wine glass
“Red ok?”
“Red’s perfect thanks”

“So Jeremy how’s everything? What are you doing now?" 
“Oh I’m a games developer”
“You don’t look particularly excited about that? That was like your dream job”
“Oh well normally people get really bored when I talk about work”
“Jeremy you’re talking to the guy who was tempted to play apocalypse of the damned with his adopted niece this morning”
Jeremy looks at up that
“Apocalypse of the damned huh? We never did finish it did we?”
“Never too late to continue”
Both of them look at each other and then there’s a quick scramble to the living room

“I don’t know how well it’s gonna work cos I obviously haven’t played it in years" 
“Dude the console doesn’t have a speck of dust don’t lie to me you probably played this yesterday”
“Shut up Mr Games Developer”
“Touché”
The loading screen comes up and it’s just like high school again
Just the two of them
Michael presses start an-
“UNCLE JEREMY”
Lil Christine comes in
“Uh hey Chrissie”
“Uncle Michael why didn’t you tell me Uncle Jeremy was gonna be here”
“I didn’t know myself”
“Mom’s gonna be so happy”
Both men look at each other
Michael speaks first
“Uh why?”
“Because mom is always talking about how you two should have been together and now you are!”

Jeremy and Michael both go bright red and neither of them speaks
“OH NO I BROKE YOU!”
Michael manages to get some words out  
“Nah Chrissie it’s fine.  Why don’t you back to bed and I’ll come in and see you in a moment”
“But I want to talk to Unc-”
“Christine Lohst - bed now”
“Fiiiiiiiiine" 

"I’m sorry about her”
“She’s not the one who’s apparently been telling her three year old that we should be together”
“Chloe has very strong feelings about what happened in high school”
“So do I”
Michael stares at him, saying nothing
 "I shouldn’t have let your feelings get in the way of our friendship and I’m so sorry that I did.  It was stupid and I hate myself for it"
“Wait shit no don’t say that.  I’m just as much to blame as you are.  It’s not like I really tried to keep our friendship together.  I thought it’d be easier to just let it fall apart.”
“So we’re both sorry and stupid and wish we could be friends again?”
“Definitely”
“Then I’m glad to be your new old friend Michael Mell”
“And I’m glad to be yours Jeremy Heere”
“I should probably tell you something though”
“What?”
“In my last year of college I worked something out - I was an idiot in high school.”
“We already said this”
“For another reason.  I was an idiot because I didn’t realise I was head over heels for you" 
"WHAT”
“I’m sorry Michael.  It took me so long to figure it out and I just rejected you in high school even though I felt the same”
“What about now?”
“What?”
“Do you feel the same now?”
Jeremy takes in Michael
His scruffy hair, his glasses that need to be pushed up, the oversized hoodie he still hasn’t gotten rid of and looks into his eyes
“Yes" 
"Oh”
“Oh?”
“Oh”
“Well, what about you Michael? Do you still like me?”
Michael doesn’t even hesitate
“YES”
“OH”
“OH”

2

After “Sucker for Pain” got reported and forced to remove from Tapastic, and some questions related the first picture, I think I should share my point of view about Saeran. 

From the prologue and many bad endings where Saeran as Unknown in it, I think we can all agree that he doesnt see MC as a woman, more like a tool so he can get his revenge on RFA, or on Saeyoung to be precise. He can sound very convincing and charming, but it doesn’t hide the fact that his behavior is very close to that of a maniac. Surely, when you’re being brain-washed and tortured almost everyday with drug, you cant be sane anymore. There’s a root to why he acted like that, as a rapist and torturer (you can see it in 707 1st bad ending) but it’s still inexcusable. That’s what I can see about his character as Unknown, and I don’t intend to write him differently. I always try to write it that MC enjoyed every moment of it as being fucked by him, but I know to some it can be disturbing. I would advise you to blacklist the tag “mystic messenger unknown” or “Unknown” on my blog if you feel that it’s too much, because no I won’t change my mind. 

As the after ending show, Saeran got a little stable and his shyness side came back. But honestly I dont think something has been imprinted in one’s mind for so long can just being cleaned spotless overnight, so in No hope No fear I potray him as an emo-teen because I saw it is the closet personality he can develop after being stable enough. Honestly I found it quite strange that Saeyoung alone can handle Saeran by just dragging him home like it was nothing, without some medical help. I want to put something like Saeran went to many therapists until he found the right one in No hope no fear, because people was trained in psychological field for a reason, so that they can help patient with psychological problem. So that Saeran can be stable with great manners and understanding, like was shown in The choi family 2. But nah, I don’t think he’s that SHY.

I still like Saeran both as unknown and as after ending Saeran, just some thoughts I think I should share though. Thanks for reading.

Adventures In Babysitting

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Request: Can you make one where Bucky and the reader go out on a date night and leave their toddler behind with the rest of the team and then in the middle of their date they start getting all these texts from panicked members of the team because they don’t know how to take care of a child? Btw love your writing and blog!!!  (a/n: thank you <3)         

Y/C/N - Your Child’s Name


Bucky has created a chatroom.

Bucky has added Steve, Sam, Bruce, Clint, Natasha, Tony, Wanda.

Bucky: How is Y/C/N???

Sam: You and Y/N left for your date 20 minutes ago.

Bucky: So????

Sam: IT’S BEEN 20 MINUTES SINCE YOU SAW Y/C/N JFC

Bucky: Y/N and I are coming back home.

Wanda: Relax! We are competent aunts and uncles.

Clint: THOR BROKE THE TV AGAIN BECAUSE HE LOST IN MARIO KART. AGAIN.

Wanda: Well, most of us are.

Keep reading

im about to go to bed, but i just want to reiterate a few things.

girls: you are not disposable. you are brilliant. you are strong. you are worth more than every single diamond that has ever and will ever exist. you are so, so amazing, and i love each and every single one of you. you should never, ever have to change any single thing about yourself for someone you’re dating, from the breath you take to the way you cut your hair to your friends to your religious or political beliefs. your lives and bodies are yours, and they are no one else’s to critique and criticize.

abuse survivors: i see you. i AM you. this is hard for me to talk about, and it would be damn near impossible without the incredible support youve shown and the awe-inspiring stories youve told. thank you. from the bottom of my heart, thank you for your support and your strength and your love. you are all so, so, so brave.

hockey tumblr, as a whole: we have GOT to stop slut shaming. we HAVE to. puck bunny? is a derogatory term based on gender, which basically by definition makes it a slur, or at least something like it. stop attacking girls who want sex with players. stop attacking girls who dont dress the way you think they should. stop attacking girls. just stop. and stop using gendered slurs to demean and harass other girls who have different opinions or choices than you.

and this one last thing: dating a player? is not a luxury. if it is, so is dating me, or you, or your friends, or my friends, because we’re all PEOPLE. we are all the same. theyre not the gods of olympus, theyre not jesus christ sent down to save us. they can skate around on large knives and handle a giant stick with more skill, care, and agility than i possess while walking down the damn stairs. i can create entire worlds in my mind and turn those worlds into words on a page, into characters and images in your head and thoughts in your heart. both are wonderful, incredible talents that have taken years to develop and earn. one is not greater than the other. their talent on the ice does not make them greater than me, or you, or any single one of us. they are people. and we have GOT to treat them as such.

To an Old Friend, With All My Love

Request: “To you, with regret just made me cry ugly tears, your writing is so beautiful. It makes me feel all kinds of emotions. A part 3, please?”

Word Count: 3,214

Pairing: None

Part 1   |   Part 2

Tag List: @1madster @elyza-jeanette @red-roses-and-stories @myrtus-amongst-the-stars @dont-give-a-bother @heneed-somemilk @caseoffics

Requests are currently open! Feel free to send one in


The knock on the door is loud, strong, assured. Sighing, you push yourself to your feet, leaving the comfy ruby couch behind you.

A tiny body zooms past you as soon as you pull open the door.

“Dorothy, stop!” Exasperation rests comfortably on the pretty face in front of you. Shaking her head, Evelyn meets your amused smile. “Don’t laugh. She’s yours this weekend.”

“I think I can handle an eight-year-old.” You step out of the way so your old friend can lug in a suitcase.

“I said the same thing when her birthday rolled around last weekend but,” she sets the suitcase on an armchair and sighs, “you’d be surprised.”

A shriek of laughter sounds from upstairs. You lift your eyebrows. “She must have found the dolls I bought her.”

Evelyn laughs once. “You didn’t have to buy her any toys. She has plenty.”

Shrugging, you step around her and return to the couch, falling onto it and patting the empty cushion next to you. “I didn’t know if she’d bring any of them. Besides, if I’m going to be the cool, unrelated aunt, I have to spoil her.”

Evelyn sits next to you, crossing her legs. “You know she already thinks you’re better than me. You have no clue how many times she’s asked if you could be her mother instead.”

You smile. “I’m sorry for stealing your child’s affections.”

“Oh please.” She waves her hand. “I know you don’t want them too badly. You’d have to be married to Charles.”

“Is he still spending late nights out?”

She nods twice, somber. “He comes back so late, sometimes I wonder…” she trails off, then looks up at you. “But this weekend trip should do some good, I hope.”

“I hope it does.” You nudge her foot with yours. “I’m always here to talk if you need me.”

She gives you a sad smile. “I know.” The room falls silent save for muffled shouts from Dorothy upstairs. “Hey,” Evelyn perks up, “how’s the marriage front looking for you? Meet any cute men in Bulgaria?”

Keep reading

Ok guys but for real what if bts does perform in the bbmas, they will be performing korean music in USA, as much as that is an amazing thing, lets not forget the number of ppl who stan them in US Is not a huge majority. Bts will be exposed to a majority of the people who dont know anything about korean music. Bts be facing lot of judgemental attitude from the audience and celebrities, people who are inclined to mainstream music and people who think BTS doesnt belong in mainstream music. What if BTS has to face racism there? What if they are picked on for their language barriers? Only Rapmon can understand english properly and if any negative instance occurs on the stage wtf will happen? How will rapmon handle that while rest of the members will cluelessly wait for him to explain? Other members won’t even KNOW what most people will be saying to them. Their inability to express themselves might give people in bbmas to attack their vulnerability. I dont want them to face these things especially when they will be expecting much love and support from the bbmas if they win. I dont want them to feel hurt and disappointed by this new milestone…

anonymous asked:

Headcanons of the Rangers first road trip/travel!

Oh shit this is gonna be SO LONG 😂 Send in requests guys! 

  • They use Jason’s Mini van bc Jason is the mother of the group and no one else trusts each other with their car.
  • And Jason packs a shit tone of stuff. Because “you never know what you might need on the road.”
  • Zack shuffling through bags like “Jason do we really need all this crap?”
  • Billy being worried that they’ll forget something so he creates a list of all the essentials and continues to ask his boyfriend (Jason) to check through the bags.
  • Kim telling everyone to have their playlists ready but “if one of you plays some 70s hippy crap I will lose my shit.”
  • “Uh pretty sure it was the 60s Kim…”
  • Kim and Trini snuggling gayly with each other in the back under a blanket and Zack sitting there next to them like “if this is what the whole trips gonna be like I’m gonna need to have 500 pit stops to barf.”
  • Trini punching him for that comment.
  • “You really think Angel Grove can handle us being away this long?!”
  • Jason driving and Billy sitting in the front with the map.
  • Fighting over the aux cord but Billy being like “we could put my music on!” And Jason instantly snatching it off Zack to play his boyfriends music.

Keep reading

me yesterday, crying: i cant believe the break is over… i dont think i can handle going back to school tomorrow but i really really have to, i have to push myself past my limits otherwise i will be so fucked, i dont know how im going to make it im so tired and ill i cant handle anything right now 
me today, skipping entirely, cozied up in 30 blankets, titties out, ao3 up, not a care in the world: lol fuck that 

Tmnt time line in ryhme

In in the year 1984

came comic book heros like never before 

teenage mutant ninja turtles by eastmen and laird 

but for the turtles popularity the two men where not prepared 

In 1987  to 1988 

something happend that was really great 

For that was the year of first turtle cartoon series season

it was a big hit and for good reason

1990 was the year 

the turtles where first braught to theater 

as you probable know 

the movie made dow

So the exectuctives did choose 

tmnt 1991: the secret of the ooze 

the sequal was fair

but i wish it stopped there 

cause Tmnt 3 1993

is something that you cannot unsee

meanwhile the turtles series in 1994 

something went wrong for sure 

the art style looked real crude

they fought this weird bug dude 

the art style flipped 

and the writers tripped 

and shredder was barely around

so its likely it was going in the ground

theres no way you can defend

thats where the 80s turtles series ends 

1996 is where we go over seas 

and we have a turtle reboot made by the japanese 

on paper the idea looks swell

but in reality these two things dont mix well

IN 1997 a live action turtles series was made 

sounds good but its a facade 

for you realise soon 

its silllier than the cartoon 

Venus de milo the one the creators call a mistake 

repitiles dont breast feeds so there probable fake 

1998 things go from strange to stranger 

when the turtles go to space with the power rangers 

and that was the last we saw of the franchise 

until it attracter a pair of 4kids eyes 

Than came turtles 2003 

good for you good for me 

the fandom loved it and loved how it went 

as it focused more time on character developement 

the turtles where outrageous 

the fandom was contagious 

shredder 

never looked better

but it happend as we feard 

2006 things started to get to get weird 

suddenly the turtles are in the future 

splinter gets stuck in a competer 

theres a whole bunch of shredders running around 

 ans theme song with truly evil sound 

2007 theres a film called tmnt 

didnt work out well you see 

the film was made for the 2003 turtles fans

 so the fans of the 80s couldnt under stand 

it made fans of the orginal furios 

and it took itself too seriuos 

the turtles forever in 2009

It went over well and fine 

a crossover of diffrent turtle adaptations 

but sadly the 80s turtles didnt get the best representation 

still to turtles fans thought it was real fun 

thats when people thought it was the end of the turtle run 

for years the franchise had been gatherd dust of the shelf 

that was until nick rebooted it in 2012

and it was definatly worth the wait 

because the show turned out great 

great balance of comedy drama and action 

and the fandom had a great reaction

2014 then the next tmnt movie was invested 

tmnt fans where interested 

you can tell they where probable disapointed 

when found out the which director was appointed 

yes it was micheal bay 

the hack with the nack as they say 

no he only worked on aq few parts 

but you can tell its his by the  farts 

the fandom wasnt found of the turtle designs 

the actor choises made writers look out of there minds 

its a real agitater 

the only good scenes was in the elavator

2016 came out of the shadows 

wasnt exacly by pros 

but the probs are the same i think we already know 

no lets go back to the nicalodean show 

2017  here we reach the final nick turtles season 

i have to admit its pretty pleasing 

the turtle went though space and time 

and they have stopped lots of crime


brotherly love and forgiven mistakes 

gloriuos battles and painfulll heartbreacks 

but theres no need to pretend 

the tmnt 2012 is coming to an end 

But thats no the end of our turtle teen

theres a reboot planned for 2018 

will it be bad? will it be great ?

i dont know well have to wait 


(( hey guys i really enjoyed making this , and i hope you enjoyed reading it if you didnt sorry, if i just talked any junk about an adaptation you liked please know this was a joke, if i got anything wrong let me know too im a big girl i can handle it, okay bye  love you …………..think i need a drink of water ))