dont steal or i will kill you

Hamilton Characters as Different Social Media Platforms
  • Alexander: Tumblr. Shitposts regularly, goes on long rants about social justice issues, daddy kink, kinda rly Gay™,hates donald trump.
  • Laurens: Deviant Art. Really likes to do the Art Thing™,is really gay, quiet when u dont know him but sO FRICKIN LOUD OTHERWISE WOO!!
  • Lafayette: Vine. naive af,does not understand most jokes but tells them again anyways,talks way too fast.
  • Hercules: Twitter: Rants a lot, lowkey a fuckboy,does not have an indoor voice as he is ALWAYS HYPED!!!!
  • Madison: Snapchat. Stays at party for like 10 mins then leaves for some reason and does not come back, kinda basic but everyone still loves him,99% pure
  • Jefferson: 4chan. Is the first to know about new memes, kinda problematic,angered easily,ironically says "make america great again"
  • Washington: Facebook. Pronounces "memes" as "mey-meys",you either rly like him or rly hate him,finds out about trends months late, dad friend.
  • Burr: Google plus. Everyone knows him ut most dont rly like him , 100% salt, steals memes from Jefferson.
  • King George: Myspace. 'hahaha remember me?",really wants people to talk to him again,lonely, still thinks its 2006
  • Eliza: Pinterest. The Mom Friend™™ ,really likes DIY projects, & does everything better than you.
  • Peggy: Ifunny. Commonly overlooked,does everything """ironically""",likes memes.
  • Angelica: Instagram. #nofilter,rly passive agressive,takes pictures of her food, has an iphone.
  • Maria: Youtube. Everyone knows her name,has a bit of a bad rep but is cool af, likes cute animals.
steal the toaster

in which i try and fail to be as good as @jiilys and @alrightpotter

James Potter to whoever stole my weetabix is dead: WE ARE OUT OF MILK

James Potter: I MADE TEA AND WENT TO THE FRIDGE AND IT WAS GONE

James Potter: IM LITERALLY CRYIGN THIS IS A DISASTER

Sirius Black: chill

Sirius Black: might have been me this morning though

Peter Pettigrew: did u hv it with weetabix by any chance???

Sirius Black: …..

Sirius Black: shit


Sirius Black to Remus Lupin: do you reckon he’ll accept cornflakes?

Remus Lupin: kellogs ones?

Sirius Black: wtf no lidl ones

Sirus Black: do I look like im made of money

Remus Lupin: well yes

Sirius Black: rude


Sirius changed the name to: next doors wifi is dragon420

Remus Lupin: how did you…?

Remus Lupin: acc I don’t want to know

James Potter: omg bc they BLAZE IT

Sirius Black: omg

Peter Pettigrew: omg


Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: where r u we’re going pub

James Potter: in the library

James Potter: there’s this chem girl

James Potter: she’s so pretty

James Potter: pete?

James Potter: ???


Sirius Black to LADSLADSLADS: new business idea

Sirius Black: james sells jams in his pyjamas

Sirius Black: we can call it

Sirius Black: jim jams

Remus Lupin has left the group


James Potter to three normal ppl + fucking romeo: she came and asked to borrow my pen today !!!

James Potter: out of the whole library!!! she picked me !!!

James Potter: what does this mean???

Sirius Black removed James Potter from the group

Peter Pettigrew: oh thank god


Remus Lupin to James Potter: why have you called me fourteen times???

James Potter: oh pete fell out the window but hes fine

Remus Lupin: whAT???

Remus Lupin: I WAS GONE TWENTY MINUTES

James Potter: on a completely unrelated matter would you say forgetting your name was a sign of concussion?


Lily Evans to James Potter: congrats on winning the match, you were really good


James Potter to no Sirius we’re not going skinny dipping its 4 degrees: HELP

James Potter sent a photo

James Potter: WHAT DO I SAY????

Sirius Black: be ~cool~

Peter Pettigrew: ignore her, girls love it when you ignore them

Sirius Black: mate…. maybe this is why youre a virgin

Peter Pettigrew: for the last time im NOT A VIRGIN

Sirius Black: idk sounds like smth a virgin would say


Peter Pettigrew to James Potter: if my mum rings the flat say im not there

James Potter: but youre not here…?

Peter Pettigrew: she believs u when u say it


Remus Lupin to pineapple is never acceptable on pizza fight me sirius: new drinking game- take a shot whenever james mentions lily’s eyes

Sirius Black: do you want us to die????

James Potter: but guys

James Potter: theyre so green

James Potter: its like a forest

Peter Pettigrew: ill buy some vodka omw back


James Potter changed the group name to: MAN U 4-CHELSEA 1

Sirius Black: blocked


Sirius Black to sirius and co: dont go near the microwave btw

Peter Pettigrew: …….why????

Sirius Black: its lowkey broken

Sirius Black: and by lowkey i mean will kill a man

Remus Lupin: I swear to god if we call the fire service again we’re getting fined

Sirius Black: its fine im gonna steal benjys


Remus Lupin to Benjy Fenwick: Just a quick heads up, maybe hide your microwave

Benjy Fenwick: I already did after black stole my toaster

Remus Lupin: ah sorry about that


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: you told me benjy didn’t want his toaster anymore

Sirius Black: idk how youre studying astrophysics if you believed tht tbh


Sirius Black to moony ripped a new fiver im so proud: saw evans today

James Potter: omg did she mention me?

Sirius Black: she wanted to know if we were fucking

James Potter: what did you say???

Sirius Black: yes obvisly

James Potter: aw babe

Remus Lupin: get a room


James added Sirius Black and Lily Evans to the group: just to clarify me and sirius are not fucking

Sirius Black: exCUSE ME???

Sirius Black: DID U JST DUMP ME BY GROUP NAME????

Sirius Black: HOW WILL I EVER GET OVER THIS BETRAYAL

Lily Evans: james how could you?

James Potter: …. are you serious

Sirius Black: …..

James Potter: don’t you fucking dare


Sirius Black to James Potter: come and help me buy 150 snickers for bellatrix

James Potter: nah im in history

James Potter: isn’t she allergic to nuts

Sirius Black: exactly


Remus Lupin to Sirius Black: lily just asked if she can sit w/ us at james’s final

Sirius Black: oh mY GOD

Sirius Black: operation lames is go

Remus Lupin: I told you not to call it that

Sirius Black: it’s a gd name #hatersgonnahate

Remus Lupin: please stop


Peter Pettigrew to potter for president: afterparty at ours right?

Sirius Black: hell yes

Sirius Black: proud of you jamesy


Sirius Black changed to the group name to: WHY THE FRICKETY FRACK IS EVANS IN THE KITCHEN IN JAMES’S FOOTBALL SHIRT?????

James Potter: she cant walk around naked can she?

Bf! Haechan

  • DONGHYUCKIE
  • Ooh this boy had his eyes on you the moment you entered the room
  • Constantly looking at you and falling into a daydream and then realising that he has to act all manly and charming and has to woo you off your feet
  • but he just appeared really closed off when you first talked to him. Like he wasn’t interested in the conversation at all
  • He lowkey bullied you and made fun of you which would get you really sad
  • But then he would also make random jokes and you would laugh so hard and he would stare at you like awwwww but then when you’d notice him staring at you he’d look away. Because he’s still a shy baby
  • Purposefully bumping into you just to catch your attention 
  • But one day you got a secret note saying to meet them after school in the school playground
  • You were a little unsure if you should go or not because it could be a trap but you went along any way given your curiosity 
  • Haechan stood alone in the park, playing with the grass with his feet. You were surprised to see him, forgetting that you had to meet up with ‘someone’ (of course you didn’t realise it was Haechan who was that someone)
  • “Why’re you here Haechan?” You asked and he blushed and said “ I was waiting for you” and you went like what?????? and then realised that he was the one who wrote you the note
  • You were unsure about it but you said yes when he asked you out. The whole night you couldn’t sleep and you kept on laughing and tossing and turning reminiscing about the day’s events
  • Haechan spends his lunch time with you, like two ‘ol friends always at each other’s heels, making fun of you, roasting you, not letting you live, the norm
  • but then you’d go on cute cake shop dates and he’ll eat your food too 
  • “ya watch what you’re eating, I dont want you to kill me when I pick you up on our wedding day”
  • “Did you wash today? You hair smells” *continues sniffing your hair and hugging you*
  • stealing your things and blaming it on Mark
  • “Can I have your rubber?” “Do you have a pencil I can use?”
  • “DONGHYUK YOU SHOULD’VE LEFT YOURSELF HOME AS WELL”
  • “THEN WHO WOULD BE HERE TO PROTECT YOU HUH”
  • Extra af
  • He protected you one time from that ball approaching you and never lets you forget it
  • cute af hugs and him ruffling your hair after
  • kisses on the cheeks when he pisses you off
  • lots and lots of aegyo 
  • “I’m your cutie Haechan”
  • Buys you food and cute things he finds in the shops
  • and is so casual about like ‘here eat’ or ‘here i saw this and i thought u shud have it’
  • stares at you in class and gets detention for not paying attention
  • adhering to your arm and refusing to let go
  • rap battles, singing songs while walking home
  • him walking you home cuz he needs to protect you
  • gets so worried when you’re sick and brings food over to your place and checks on you
  • so scared of your parents its actually funny
  • “YA Y/N WHY DO U HAVE ME AS HAECHAN ON YOUR PHONE? WHY ARE THERE NO EMOJIS AND THOSE CUTE LITTLE THINGS GIRLS DO WHEN THEY’RE IN A RELATIONSHIP??”
  • Gets butt hurt easily
  • and doesn’t talk to you and acts all petty
  • gets jealous easily, at first he didnt even like you talking to boys
  • “Why dont u go and eat with that boy you were asking for homework”
  • “Mark get away from her, you’ll infect her with your stupidity”
  • But gets rlly cute too sometimes
  • wants you to not go home when he’s walking you and gives you a sad puppy look
  • knows your weaknesses and exploits them shamelessly 
  • so shameless it hurts
  • dance practice gatherings
  • dances extra hard to show off
  • waits for you if his classes finish early
  • sends you funny memes 
  • your texts are so funny and he doesnt let you study sometimes and its so annoying
  • but your conversations are so cute
  • “did u change my name yet”
  • your boyfriend is a cute savage kid who must be protected

Originally posted by 7thvelvet

some supa good slam poems(-:

here’s a list of some of my favorite slam poems because slam poetry is beautiful and wonderful and incredible and lovely and everything

sienna burnett- “U Fine?”

“my mother has a texting language all her own and when she asks, “U Fine?” this means somewhere, very recently, there was another bullet-stop ending. there was another trigger parade.”

karina stow- trigger warning

“i don’t believe in lying to children, but when she asks me what’s wrong i still tell her the storybook version; i tell her that once, a bad man broke into my home. i wish i’d also told her that bad men look like respectable young men–trigger. that bad men will compliment your nana on her lemon squares. bad men write love poems- trigger. bad men smile so wide they will swallow you and you, you will convince yourself you asked him to.”

don luben- 14 lines from love letters or suicide notes

“i came home on thursday and found all of the chairs in the house stacked in a pile in the center of my kitchen; i don’t know how long they have been like that, but it must have been me that did it. it is the kind of thing a ghost might do, to prove to the living he is still there. i am haunting my own apartment.”

tucker bryant- facts about myself

“but being built like a short story is a lesson in finding other ways to be the tallest tale in the room.”

sarah kay- love letter from a toothbrush to a bicycle

“i know about your rough edges and i have seen your perfect curves, and i will fit into any spaces you let me. if loving you means getting dirty, bring on the grime, i will leave this porcelain home behind.”

savannah brown- i wish i was (a flaw examination)

“i wish i was more interesting but that might be one of those things where
everyone else thinks i’m interesting, but i don’t because i’m me and i know i spend most of my days wearing pajamas in my room, which isn’t that interesting.”

phile kaye- beginning, middle, and end

“like the night you thought you were invincible, ran out into the lightning storm with a million keys tied to a million kites, and a clench in your jaw that said, “take me with you, goddammit, i dare you.” and the week you finally reached out to feel your father’s cheeks and just found paper cuts.”

dia davina- emergency room

“dont touch my heart when it’s thundering. you wouldn’t swim in a lightning storm, would you?”

melissa newman-evans- 9 things i would like to tell every teenage girl

“you remember that metaphor about killing you being stealing your voice? sometimes…the world will actually try to kill you. you’ll never deserve it.”

desiree dallagiacomo- sink 

“is that not living? being so close to death that you paint it on your skin?”

  • Harley: Did you take my gum that was in the car?
  • Joker: Probably.
  • Harley: I'm going to shoot you the next time you take my gum.
  • Joker: Shoot me? Really?
  • Harley: Yup. With a shotgun.
  • Joker: Jesus.
  • Harley: He can't help you now Puddin' ;)

Significant other: you stole my heart

Me: !! P Le as e, forgive me,,, it was m y first t ime stealing i wasnt thinking i s w ear ill N E V ER Do It again, oh god, my parents are gonna kill me pl e ase dont call the police!!!

Amaimon

Originally posted by riceiscolourblind

Can we just take a moment to imagine how freaking clingy Amaimon would be to his s/o because their his and he doesn’t want anybody else to touch them and how they would have to explain ten thousand times that they are not trying to steal you or else this happens “no don’t kill him, yes I know he is a guy, yes I know you don’t like him, I SAID DONT KILL HIM YOU BETTER GO GET HIM OFF THAT BUILDING HIS PARENTS WILL KILL ME!!!” every male friend you have straight or gay is not safe PROTECT THEM and if he didn’t like someone being reminded every time you talk to them and him whining when you call or text someone too much

Criminal AUs

approx half are by me and half are by amphar0s 

  • im your drug dealer and your parents seem kinda protective bc they just rang me up askin who i was cause im just listed as the flame emoji on your phone and i couldnt think of anything to say so i told them i was your lover please still buy drugs off me im running out of clients 
  • somehow weve ended up robbing the same bank on the same night and now were trying to evenly split the money and i can see you putting extra notes into your pile put those back you shit 
  • im here to poison the king and ive already laced the drink im gonna be giving him so i might as well enjoy the night and youre really cute and were flirting quite a bit and wait no you cant be the kings poison tester
  • i saw you lace the kings drink w poison so ive switched them and now im gonna down this shit and make you cry cause i know youve been hittin on me this whole time you silly idiot
  • we’re both graffiti artists and idk who you are but you keep spraying little hearts in the corners of my pieces to show appreciation and im gettin more and more desperate to catch you in the act
  • i sold you fake tickets and you’ve gone into such a rage im fearing for my life i will track the band and introduce you personally take all the money i made please dont hurt me 
  • we’re assassins assigned to take out the same guy and we got so caught up arguing over who gets to kill him we didnt notice him run away 
  • we’re roommates and youre really cool but i stg if you steal another road or shop sign and leave it our living room i will throw you out there is a pile of 20 in there now i dont think theres a mcdonalds in this town with its light up M left intact
  • im a pickpocket that stole your phone and your mom has called twenty times in the last hour bc shes worried and frankly so am i where the hell are you
  • you called me in the middle of night asking if id have your back if you did something really bad so immediately im getting a shovel ready assuming youve killed someone, but no youve just stolen all the goldfish from the pet store as an act of love
  • ive just arrived at the pet shop and it turns out you actually have the killed the shop owner you really should tell people these things so they can be emotionally prepared
  • we’re alone in the woods burning the evidence you look so in the zone and i rly shouldnt be this turned on by you right now but i am what is happening

anonymous asked:

The obvious choice of roadhog

A. Roadhog is obviously stil a murderous psycho and I’d like to think that’s carry over into being sadistic and genuinely enjoying inflicting pain on others physically. Like even if he cares about me I still want him to be really into pushing me around u///u

B. But he’s also really funny and likes stuffed animals and when he isn’t busy wrecking my life he likes treating me like a kid and stealing toys for me and being like “no you cant do this/that I’ll do it for you”

C. He’s got really bad disassociation with who he really is and taking off his mask would give him a panic attack. He doesn’t feel safe without it. (Unrelated to the normal world au art I draw with him not wearing it)

D. I like to think that the junkers dont go out of their way to kill innocent people, innocent people just get hurt in the crossfire sometimes and that they aren’t actually the most terrible people in the world

anonymous asked:

I really hate how some blogs have decided to govern what others do. According to them, ppl shouldn't even be doing commissions because it's highly illegal now. I don't even feel like drawing for the dialovers fandom anymore. What's the point even.

what

i say you draw whatever you damn like and not give a shit about those people. 

oh? how is commissions illegal? are we killing someone through it? are we stealing? 

do we become outlaws because of it? do we dishonor their families and cows because of it? i dont think so

anonymous asked:

How does Kazimir and G!sans child look like?

kazi: he’s a little shit that crawled out of my womb.
G!sans: i have to agree.
Hebi: fuck you too

things about him:
-he’s a literal snake
-i mean he kills with strong poison so dont eat what he tries to give you.
-his parents dont take care of him, he takes care of himself ever since he learned how to walk.
-he steals things.
-he’s an angry bean who needs love.
-kazi doesnt want to take care of him cuz he reminds him of G
-G!sans simply doesnt want to take care of him

fanon vs canon
  • fanon raph: smooth motherfucker, will steal your lady, bad boy
  • canon raph: angry chihuahua, animal lover, can talk to pigeons, will punch you if you eat the last dorito
  • fanon leo: mulan honor syndrome, angsty, boring but sexy
  • canon leo: mulan honor syndrome, fanboy, dork, cinnamon roll but could kill you, really wants raph to stop angsting all the time
  • fanon donnie: sexy teacher, actually i dont see much about him in the fandom except that and maybe apritello
  • canon donnie: stays up to 4 am working on stuff with a meal that consists basically only of ramen noodles and coffee, really awkward with girls, can go up to 3 weeks in a row without seeing the surface and not suffer
  • fanon mikey: innocent baby, would never hurt anybody, must be protected at all costs
  • canon mikey: "bro u wanna see me drink this soda with chips and peanut butter blended into it? *does it anyways*", will rather embrace the void than pick up the sock that's been on his floor for 3 months now, sinning cinnamon bun
bob characters as texts i have recieved
  • winters: FOLLOW THE RULES ITS NOT THAT HARD I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU FEEL THE NEED TO BREAK EVERY ONE OF THEM POSSIBLE
  • nixon: ( ͡ʖ ͡°)
  • welsh: steal my homework and i will stab you with a fork i stole
  • speirs: *shoves hands in jar of honey* ive got sticky fingers
  • webster: i have a papercut i cant come over u will have to do the whole project on ur own
  • perconte: im not little fucKING FIGHT ME WAit no dont pls im smol dont kill me
  • liebgott: LETS FUCKIN DO THIS *cracks knuckles* *pops neck* *stretches* COMIC BOOK TIME
  • toye: i swear to god girl i will fight you i will fight your mom and your dad and anyone who gets in the way of my fists because i have no control please send help
  • guarnere: *singing* text me one more time i will fuck you up-up-up-up, gonna murder, gonna murder, gonna murder, dddddDEATH
  • lipton: i gotta go ignore you now bye
  • heffron: just imagine how cute a penguin couple would be, like would they hold flippers? imagine the snowball fights omg its so cute, i want a penguin girlfriend
  • blithe: what do you think dragons dream about?
  • luz: i just spent my life savings on 97 bags of jolly ranchers
  • roe: shoutout to me for only losing my chill once. thirteen people died. never again.
  • sobel: stop
  • dike: ¿¿¿¿???؟؟؟؟؟؟﹖﹖﹖¿¿¿¿

anonymous asked:

i dont care about whatever drama youre in but would it kill you to stop stealing artwork for your id pages like. the least you could do is source them or just use official art lel

im gonna source them when i wake up later i said earlier i would i promise

ProfError-[EdgyShadowChan26]-Last Sunday at 10:23 PM

SHIT MAN I AM THE BEST AROUND look at me when I walk into the room people go silent and uncomfortable and they LEAVE jesustapdancingchristonarug this is just my LIFE IN A NUTSHELL

Oh no- there they go too- EVERYONES LEAVIN ME

Ruen | Dr. Fallen [Wildpaw]-Last Sunday at 10:24 PM

She follows Whip, grinning.

ProfError-[EdgyShadowChan26]-Last Sunday at 10:24 PM

this is what I get for being the worst person in existence, fuckn yay me I hope I got a goddamn blue stupid fckn ribbon for trying

HEY LOOK AT ME, my life is terrible and im dyin alone but at least I have a cheap ribbon reminding me I tried and fckn failed

oh god.

Am I alone.

what a stupid question, HELL YES I AM FOREVER AND EVER

I scared them off. Man where is my fckn blue ribbon I EXPECT ONE NOW

Holy shit worst person ever award I think I deserve a misery sandwich made of my own tears and my destroyed liver from years of alchohol abuse and regret

wait I dont have a liver.

I’m a skeleton.

OH MAN OH GEE OH GOLLY FCKN GUM DROPS

NO THATS RIGHT I HAVE MY PHD

Genius over here

oh wait I know

its because of the vodka. Killed half my braincells like a BOSS

thats how you fckn do it, damnit I deserve to lose every single one of those damn assholes WHAT HAVE BRAINCELLS EVER DONE FOR ME

wait I’m a skeleton

I DONT HAVE A BRAIN

how the HELL DID I GET MY PHD

WHAT THE HELL AM I

HOW AM I TALKING RIGHT NOW I HAVE NO LIPS

oh god

And all my stupid fckn new friends left me

(HEy THATS OK I know he’s insane and fun to watch!)

THATS RIGHT YOU WERE ALL GONNA BE MY FCKN BFFS ungrateful assholes

I mean actually

they should be goddamn happy because holy shit I CANT EVEN STAND MYSELF

thats literally the best goddamn thing to do for them is to get as far as hell away from them and like fckn bury myself in the sand

wait theres a fckn graveyard oh HELL YES

OH HELL YES move over other stupid fckn skeletons I’m crawlin into a grave and burying myself

YOUR WELCOME YOU STUPID UNGRATEFUL NEW FCKN FRIENDS IM GONNA SUFFOCATE IN THE GROUND TO KEEP YOU SORRY ASSHOLES AWAY FROM ME

wait im a skELETON I CANT SUFFOCATE CAN I

oh god this whole stupid fckn thing makes no sense, I make no sense

I’m gonna go back to drinking and like, pretend everything is okay. Which its not. Because I’m still me.

NO ONE LIKES ERRORS

We’re all stupid and awful OH I SEE HOW IT IS

He takes another swig from his flask

HEY KNOW WHAT

I dont even know what I’m doing anymore

I mean I cant see straight, which is probably fine

because I think i’m super fuckn gay

maybe, I dunno

oh wait hell yes I am I forgot

OH RIGHT BAD MEMORY = ERRORS HAVE BAD MEMORY HUR HUR

so FUCKIN FUNNY

Thank god I’m fittin all these stupid error fckn character tropes

who the hell would I be if I WASNT

okay wait

I have a great fckn idea

I say, to no one around me

because I’m alone. And no one likes me.

Because guess WHAT THE FCK IS GOING ON HERE

I’m so horrible the food venders left their fckn posts

SO ALL THAT SHIT IS FAIR GAME

I’m going to eat every single thing

and feel fat and be disgusted with myself as I do on a daily basis

oh god what, why am I so awful

thats my entire personality

like WHAT ELSE EVEN AM I BUT A SELF LOATHIN PIECE OF- you know what who gives a shit I want some free tacos

Proferror SCORES FOUR TACOS! LEVEL UP!

OH HELL YES, FOUR TACOS

man its my only dream in life comin true

stealing tacos from an empty food court

because my life is a lie and everyone hates me

except you, tacos

you like me

Tacos would you like to be my friend? Hell yes you fckn do

but tacos you did not take this into account

IM A FCKN TACO CANNIBAL

OH HELL YES BYE TACO! He eats one taco

he then, lifts up the second taco, and does voice acting “OH HOLY SHIT YOU ATE MY MOM”

“YOUR MOM WAS DELICIOUS”

“YOU SICK ASSHOLE”

“AHAHAHAH GUESS WHOS NEXT?!” he eats a second taco

“WHAT THE FUCK YOU ATE MY BROTHER”

“Your brother was a bit too SPICY FOR MY TASTE BUT I ATE HIM JUST FOR YOU”

“YOU SICK STUPID FUCKIN MONSTER STOP EATING MYFAMILY”

“HELL NO DONT TELL ME WHAT TO DO”

“eh heheheheehheheh. Oh shit. You know what, I do still have your FATHER HERE WHO NEEDS TO GET EATEN.”

“WHAT NO!? NOT MY POP POP!”

“Oh hell yes I’m going to eat your pop pop and not in the fckn fun way”

“IM EATING HIM TO LIKE FCKN KILL HIM this is fckn hannibal lecter town population YOU AND FCKN ME and your dad”

“YOU PSYCHOTIC JERK”

“CALL ME THAT AGAIN YOU STUPID TACO IM FUCKIN INTO IT”

“Oh god what are you like sexually turned on by like, being treated like garbage?”

“UM HELL YES I AM TACO-CHAN”

“Taco-chan?! ONLY MY FAMILY CAN CALL ME THAT”

“WELL YOU KNOW WHAT TACO-CHAN!?” Proferror chooses to consume taco-dad

“YOU HAVE NO FAMILY LEFT TO CALL YOU ANYTHIN YOU LIL BITCH”

Proferror now decides to laugh maniacally, while climbing up on top of one of the food court stands “THATS IT!” The taco screamed “I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE!”

“ ‘Wait Taco-chan! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!’ The Professor replied in horror. 'WAIT COME BACK!’ 'NO NEVER!’ Screamed Taco-chan!” The professor held the Taco out as far as possible over the ledge. “ 'I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE, YOU MURDERED MY FAMILY BY EATING THEM LIKE A FCKN STUPID PIECE OF ASSHOLE SHIT’ 'WOAH LANGUAGE!’ ”

“YOU DESERVE THE WORST LANGUAGE, PROFESSOR. You ate them…. BUT I WILL NOW ALLOW YOU THE CHANCE TO EAT ME! ”

“WAIT- NO- NO TACO-CHAN WAIT! NOOOOO!”

The professor drops the Taco about ten feet. It breaks. Poor taco organs- such as lettuce, meat, cheese, or whatever. Spills onto the ground

“OH GOD NO TACO CHAN”

Welp okay Taco-chan is dead

and my dream of eating four tacos in a row is also dead

alas once again my life is awful and gross and full of horrendousness

thats ok Taco-chan had it coming

their father ran a horrible organization which survived off of child labor

so, half the fckn world, essentially

Walmart, thats it

YOU KNOW WHAT

OKAY NEXT GAME

Lets play

a game of

jump off the roof and see what bones I break

I am literally made of bones and only bones so I’ll def know which ones break

Proferror leaps off the building. He hits the ground “ OW oh hell yes, ouch.”

He sits up, examining himself. His bones are fine. He’s in perfect physical condition. Mentally he probably needs a lot of fckn medication

OH THANK GOD NOTHING BROKE

THATS WHAT I WANTED

I wanted to be physically unhurt

I wasnt trying to go for BREAKING SOMETHING AT FUCKIN ALL

maybe I should just do it myself

wait not that’ll hurt

ACTUALLY IM COOL WITH HURTING

Look at all tHESE NEW FRIENDS WHO LEFT ME- INCLUDING TACO-CHAN

Taco didn’t know it yet, but we were gonna be bffs

I mean thats somethin Errors do, murder your family and kidnap you until you love them

WAIT A MINUTE HOW COULD I BE SO BLIND

I should start kidnapping family members

and maybe not doing like cannibalism

just kill em outright and steal some poor soul

and like use that good ol stockholm to get them to love me

though, I mean, I dont even love me.

I fckn hate me god I’m a horrible piece of terrible trash

and MAN I DESERVE TO GET FCKN WRECKED

((im still goin I apologize)

Like man you know what I need

somone to shove me down and like remind me what shit I am

I’d LOVE A GOOD OL NIGHT OF SAD TWISTED REGRET

especially if I fckn cried at the end

like man that would be fckn sweet

but I havent cried since the great war of 82

a war of which I WAS NOT IN

BECAUSE I WAS TOO BUSY BEIN A GODDAMN MOTHERFCKN SCIENTIST

probably, I cant remember what I ACTUALLY DID

but IM ASSUMIN I WAS A SUPER BADASS SCIENTIST BEFORE I ERRORED THE FCK OUT

and became this sexy as shit nightmare

man tho poor Taco-chan

I still wanted to kill them with my mouth

YOU KNOW WHAT

Im going to eat Taco-chan

(I think anoter error is gonna show up  )

(I mean maybe who knows)

Error walks over to Taco-chan. Their body is a sad heap on the ground

Aww poor Taco-chan, I always FCKN HATED YOU

He sits down, and picks up the pieces, shoving them in his mouth “EVEN MGGFFF IN DEAFF- YOU CANNOT ESCAPEE ME”

Well ok thats done- wow p sure that was dirt

yeah no that was lots of dirt

mostly dirt, even

I LITERALLY JUST ATE DIRT

and you know what

its like true fckn cannibalism

because Im dirt

and ALSO GARBAGE SO YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK EVER

IM EATING MORE DIRT

FUCK YOU WORLD AND YOUR STANDARDS

IM EATING WHAT I WANT!

E R R 0 R - Ninjatore-Last Sunday at 10:58 PM

he enters the food court and glances at the prof doing weird shit …
he tilts his head confused …

ProfError-[EdgyShadowChan26]-Last Sunday at 10:58 PM

and with that, Proferror starts shoving dirt in his mouth. Holy hell, thinks the audience. What a smart guy. He’s so great and smart, eating dirt like that to defy an awful classist elitest social system- THATLL SHOW THE WORLD WHOS FCKN BOSS

Prof stops, glancing over to Error “….” He has a handful of dirt shoved in his mouth

E R R 0 R - Ninjatore-Last Sunday at 10:59 PM

… …

wh-what t-th-the fu-fuck ar-are yo-you do-doi-doing . ..

ProfError-[EdgyShadowChan26]-Last Sunday at 10:59 PM

He spits it out. The dirt falls on the ground “….I’m roleplaying.”

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