dont look over my shoulder

“I will never let anyone hurt you. Do you hear me? I will always protect you. I promise.”

Pairing: Dean x Sister!Reader, Sam x Sister!Reader
Warning: Attempted Rape


Another hunt well done. You, Sam, and Dean just finished taking out a nest of vampires. Something easy, yet thrilling. Another hunt to take your minds off the real problems your family is facing at the moment.

Dean swerved into the parking lot of a strip club. Sam turned his shoulder to look at his older brother, “Uh, dude.”

Dean looks back with a smirk, “What? Hey, you know what? We did a damn great job on that hunt. Came out with barely any scratches. Now to me, that deserves a night out in the town.”

“Sorry if watching other girls shake their ass is not my cup of tea,” You roll your eyes.

“You won’t be disappointed,” Dean winks, hopping out of the car like a bunny rabbit.

The club is dark, dusted with smoke from men’s’ cigars and cigarettes. Loud music playing provocative music blared through the speakers, bouncing off the walls. Half naked women walk around the place in high heels and panties, serving their customers like a normal restaurant.  Men goggle at the women as they strut by their tables.

Dean pulls me to a small round table for four. A woman wearing a very small bikini top for her large breasts asks us for our drinks. Dean’s smile is so big. I would smile at his happiness if I didn’t have a large set of boobs staring back at me.

Sam is trying not to enjoy himself as much. Whether it is for my benefit or not, he is failing. He shifts in his seat every other minute and bites down on his grin.

“Cheers, brothers,” I raise my glass of vodka soda.

On the stage in front of us a woman performs her pole dancing routine. And I have to give to her, she is so talented. And strong. To be able to hold your body weight like that seems impossible.

Dean stuffs a couple of bills into her top, keeping his cool. Sam claps his hands, licking his lips.

The woman points her finger to me. I point to myself too, me? Was she really trying to talk to me? She nods her head and motions for me to get on stage with her. I shake my head. I feel my face turning tomato red.

Playfully, Dean is pushing me to go up there. I’m fully clothed, uncoordinated…he was going to use this opportunity to make fun of me.

I take the lady’s hand and follow her on stage. Beyonce’s song, “partition” plays and I playfull sway to the music. Men holler. For me? Doubtful. But I have fun with it. You do only live once…well maybe multiple times if your last name is Winchester. But from what I’ve learned growing up, you should always live in the moment.

The song ends and I take my seat, hiding my face as my brothers chuckle in their seats.

The end of the night comes a lot sooner than I expected. As Dean, Sam, and I are walking to the Impala around 3 AM, we hear a man call out Dean’s name. On instinct, all three of us turn around. Protectively, yet curiously.

The man is about Dean’s age. Tall, muscular with wavy brunette hair. He wears a usual hunters outfit: jeans and T and a leather jacket. He’s cute. But if he was just in the club then he saw me dancing and that’s humiliating.

“Chris!” Dean’s demeanor softens. His smile widens and he goes in for a bro hug. Sam and I stand back, confused. “How have you been?”

“Not bad. Fancy seeing you at a place like this. Just like old times, right?” Chris smacks Dean’s chest lightly and turns towards Sam and I. “Hey guys.”

“Oh,” Dean coughs, motion towards his younger siblings. “This is Sam and YN. This is Chris. We met senior year in high school, found out we were both hunting the same thing. He helped me out on a salt n’ burn.”

“Hey,” Sam says. I wave.

“YN, last time I saw you, you hadnt even hit puberty yet….now look at you,” Chris looks me up and down. I shrink and become suddenly aware of how uncomfortable his gaze is. I give him a polite grin back. But he doesnt stop looking.

“What are you doing here?” Sam interrupts his personal moment, stepping out a little in a protective manor.

“On my way to the Carolinas…just thought I woudld take a small detour if you know what I’m saying,” he smirks playfully.

“Well, it’s getting late now, but hey, maybe tomorrow we can meet up for a beer or something. We can stay in town for another day.” Dean says.

“Yeah that sounds great,” Chris says. “I’ll see you then.” Chris turns around to walk back into the strip club. He looks over his shoulder one last time and I feel his stare on me.


The next afternoon Dean tells us of all the fun and daring things him and Chris used to do when they were kids like sneaking into bars, college parties, all the girls they got, etc. The whole time he speaks he has a smile on his face.

“You guys were really close then, huh?” Sam laughs taking another bite of his sandwich. “How come you haven’t seen him for so long?”

“I dont know… he had his own family troubles and we had ours. We kind of just dealt with our own shit separately. You guys coming tonight?”

Sam looks at me, waiting for me to answer first. “Um, I dont think so,” I shrug. Its nothing I have against Chris, but he gave me weird uncomfortable vibes. I would feel a lot better just doing my own thing tonight.

“Oh come on, dont be a downer, YN. It will be fun. Sammy, you can come too.”

I give Sam a look and finally agree. Its been a while that I have seen Dean this happy and I didnt want to ruin his night.


We meet at a bar that met in the middle of our two motels. Chris is already there, sitting on a stool. His beer bottle is halfway done. He makes eye contact with me first. His smile grows.  

“YN, you look lovely.” He wraps me in a hug. I’m surprised at first and dont hug back. He stays there for a couple of seconds too long.

“Thanks,” I look down as we step away from each other. I wave my finger to the bartender to start whipping them up.

“So tell me what you’ve been doing,” Dean says to Chris. “Are you still in the business?”

Chris nods his head. “Yeah, I’m on my own. My father passed away a couple of years ago. Heart attack. Can you believe it? Never thought he would be going down with something so…normal, you know?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry to hear that. We lost our father too. Its tough, but thats why we got beer.”

“So, YN, you have a boyfriend?” Chris asks. Straight to the point.

“No,” I say. “Can’t get too close to anyone with this life.”

“You can always take risks.”

“Not with other people’s lives,” I narrow my eyes.

“Feisty…I like it.” He winks.

“You got a girl around you arms?” Dean asks.

“I dont like being strung down. You out of all people should know the feeling.”

“YN, wanna play pool?” Sam asks finding a way to squeeze me out of there. We are able to slide of conversation.

“Thanks,” I whisper.

“Don’t worry about. I don’t like him either. I remember him too. He was always talking about girls and drugs….not a dude to be friends with. I didnt like the way he was looking at you either.”

Two rounds pool, Sam beat me both times. “I need a break,” I smile.

“Dont be such a sore loser,” Sam teases.

“Oh, we’ll see who the loser is when I get back,” I point. “I’m going out to get some fresh air.”

I walk outside into the cool November air. I can see my breath as I exhale. I take a couple steps away from the door.

A couple of minutes later, I hear the door open and close again. I dont look over my shoulder to see who came out. And I dont have to cause whoever did, grabbed me by the shoulders and shoved me up against the wall.

I push away from the man holding me up against the wall. I come face to face with Chris. He is smiling. “You dont know how long I’ve wanted to do this.” He forces his lips onto mine. I try pushing away from him, but he is ten times stronger than me. He grabs my twisting wrists and holds them over my head. His leg parts mine.”Your moves last night were so hot,” he says referring to the strip club. I try kicking him away. He steps on my foot, crushing bone with his hard boots on my flip flops.

I cry out for help. But no one hears me and those who do are drunk.

His free hand slides up my shirt and under my bra. His grimy hands squeeze my breast. Tears fill my eyes as I continue to be violated. Chris is moaning, enjoying every minute of this. His hand slides down my stomach to my jean zippers, undoing the button. Then he undoes his. His hand trims my panties. I bite down on his tongue. He pulls away in shock. He slaps me across the face. Hard.

“Hey!”

Chris is ripped off of me. Im pulled into a tight embrace. I fight it at first. But I look up and see Sam. He looks down on me with so much concern. I squeeze his arms, wanting to be safe, wanting the sense of safety.

Chris stumbles, pulling his pants back up. I hear his zipper. I shutter, digging my fingers into Sam’s biceps. Sam whispers in my ear.

Dean stands there. Dumbfounded. He and Chris stare each other down. After a couple of moments Dean finally says, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Dean, its–”

“Are you actually fucking kidding me?! My little sister? My fucking sister? You were going to try and fuck my sister?” Dean takes a step closer with every move. “And without her consent? You think you can actually force yourself on my sister.”

“You know how it is, Dean. We got to get whatever we can on the road. Your sister was testing me all night. Her at the strip club last night! She was begging me to get in her pants. If you should be blaming anyone, blame your whore of a sister!”

That was when Dean threw the first punch. “I’m going to kill you, you son of a bitch. You hear me?” Dean hits him again. “I should have known. I should have known you never changed. All you want is some ass. And you’ll ruin anyone’s life to get it.”

“Dean,” Sam says softly. Dean turns around. Sam motions to me shaking in his arms. Dean looks back at Chris and drops him to the ground.

“I never want to see you again. Do you hear me?” Dean turns around, throws the keys to Sam. “You drive, all take care of her.”

Sam transfers me into Dean’s arms. He carries me to the car bridal style. In the back seat of the familiar I cry wanting nothing more than to take a shower.

“I am so sorry,” Dean holds me close, stroking my hair. “I am so sorry. If I didnt make you come tonight-”

“It’s not your fault,” I hiccup.

“I will never let anyone hurt you. Do you hear me? I will always protect you. I promise.”

i wanna feel safe on the street i dont want to have to constantly look over my shoulder i dont want to have 911 dialed on my phone just waiting for the press of a button i dont want to have to cut my walks short because i feel i’m being followed i dont want to rethink my outfit 10 times because it might be “asking for it” i shouldnt have to do anything besides go outside i shouldnt have to jump through all of these hoops just to feel safe

  • me: *looking for happy lgbt characters*
  • shows/movies: here you go!!!!!!
  • me: yesss! representation!!!!
  • shows/movies: ....
  • shows/movies: jk. Lol.
  • me: wait- no.
  • shows/movies: *kills them off, writes them off the show, woops their straight, driven over by a car, terminally ill, forgets they exist, who?????*
  • me: but-
  • me: I thought I was safe.
psa

if you know me in real life and i didnt give you my specific permission to follow, please don’t. firstly, it’s a huge-ass invasion of privacy because i didnt tell you my url since i didnt want you to have it. just respect okay.

its not that i dont like you if i dont give you my url, its just that i dont want you looking at my tumblr. please respect my boundaries. think of tumblr as a hiding place for me. its just annoying okay it makes me feel so exposed.

sometimes my friends are like, “oh okay but a bunch of ppl online follow you why cant i?” THATS LITERALLY SO DIFFERENT. i see you people daily at school and i cant avoid you if you ever make me anxious and stuff or whatever. i cant “block” you. i cant think out a good response before answering your question. i cant unfollow you irl. literally, please stop comparing that ok. 

if you know my url and you are one of my friends who do follow me because i told u my url or something please dont tell anyone else my url. i know you wont but i just really want to say it again because lately more people have been asking me what my url is (since everyone knows i have a fucking tumblr). 

also please dont ask me for my url, i specifically told my friends to stop asking me because it makes me uncomfortable and anxious. and please dont stalk me or look over my shoulder when im on the computer/phone to see my url. i used to have a friend who fucking did that and im constantly terrified shes going to tell people it. 

so in conclusion, dont fucking follow me if i didnt ask/said you could okay. like its annoying and it makes me anxious because internet me is different from irl me. i dont want popular ppl following me as a joke. i dont want people who hate me to send anon shit. i dont want people to ask me to promo them (i only promo friends fuck off). i dont want people stalking me. theres a reason why i tell my tumblr to certain people at school. 

if you know me irl and you follow me without my permission just please dont, unfollow me okay.