donki

Compilation of some of my favorite dialogues from the BNHA manga.

I really hope all of these make it into the anime, cause they’re all comedy gold. 

Bakugou: Heh, kid thinks he’s an adult.
Todoroki: reminds me of someone I know….
Bakugou: AH? HE’S NOTHING LIKE ME! AT LEAST I DON’T KEEP ALL MY EMOTIONS PENT UP INSIDE LIKE A CERTAIN SOMEONE!
Todoroki: relax… it was a joke. 

Yaoyorozu: The more I consume, the more I can create.
Sero: kinda like poop
[Jirou punches Sero in the face]

Bakugou: KING OF EXPLODOKILLS
Midnight: I’d suggest trying something different for your hero name…that’s not gonna slide….
Bakugou: fine.
Bakugou: BARON OF EXPLODOKILLS
Midnight: Again…not gonna slide.
Kirishima: How about Blasty McSplode!?!

Shouji: I’ll tell you now…I don’t have anything interesting in my room…
Mina: …more like you don’t have anything PERIOD!!!
Todoroki: ….Is this what they refer to as “minimalist”?

[Yaoyorozu offers to tutor people]
Kirishima: [to Bakugou] Talk about a gap in personal virtue
Bakugou: I’m plenty virtuous too fuckmunch!! Why don’t I tutor you till you’re a puddle of blood?!?
Kirishima: Ohh i’ll take you up on that! 

(more under the cut) 

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Random shitpost headcanons

(BOI ANGST IS OVER IM BRINGING MEMES BACK)

- Travis and Dante got the other members to get into teams and they played online Uno, 7-0, draw until you can play mode. And Dante was a fuck and set it to 700 points. They played for 5 AND A HALF HOURS

- kawaii chan dabs whenever the others ask for sweets. Aphmau does it on purpose so she’ll do it in the cafe. A lot of people dab with kawaii chan

- the entirety of the edge squad has danced to both gandum style and that new song that goes (Doo do do do Doo) (shh idk this meme)

- Ivy, who has 5 years experience and practice in digital editing and art. Took an entire 8 hours out of her life to Photoshop Boltos head on Shrek, Garroths head on Fiona, Kim’s head on donky, And michis head on the dragon. And she did it fucking well.

- gene and Dante are masters in synchronised dabbing

- Travis is a walking shit post generator when he hasn’t slept in four days and is running off the raw power of energy drinks and coffee with crushed caffeine pills as sugar

- honest to god Michi does the “-BODY ONCE TOLD ME!” Everytime someone says “some”

- walking Shit post generator two is Bolto, just Bolto as a person and the ridiculous Shit he will say

- aphmau once said “oh ohh no, I dropped my monster condom that I use for my magnum dong” and everybody just gave her this fucking look. She laughed so hard she almost passed out

- aphmau makes Aaron participate in memes

- Laurence is secretly a meme master and knows every meme in existence

- Whenever Zane dabs everyone has to take a moment to realise that Zane is participating in there memes willingly and enjoying them

- Zane is meme garbage thanks to aphmau and Dante

- aphmau getting Zane to say the magnum dong line and kawaii chan asks to see it. Zane practically chokes on his own spit

- Lucinda gave the rainbow squad meifwa features so they could dance to “nyanyanyanya” (that’s the name of the nyan cat song I shit you not. And it’s made by hutsune miku). The video got over a million views in two days

- Zane plays cat videos and kawaii chan watches them like she’s in a trance because “kitttttyyyyyyyy”

- Silvana is actually up to date on all the memes. And whenever the others dab she just looks at Eric and goes “didn’t that meme die months ago??” And he just shrugs because he doesn’t know shit about memes

- Laurence come out of the closet is still an inside joke meme

- the newest meme is “you two can’t fuck there”. This was in reference to the one time gene and Bolto almost had sex on the coffee table

- walking shitposter Travis has said some great things such as “fuck I dropped will to live.” “I wanna stick my dick in the blender” “do you think a cactus would be happy if I hugged it?” “What if whenever we call a cockroach gross. It tells its friends and sends more cockroaches” “can I fist a book or am I gonna lose my hand?” “Collage is like the biggest fuck you ever because, you pay a shit ton of money for books you never need, for a class you already know everything about, only to get given a peace of paper that’s like “hey fuck you thanks for your money your Just as stupid as when you got here and we taught you nothing besides learning how to drink coffee like its a shot and swallow more caffeine pills then your roommate who may or may not be drunk”“

- Aaron has said some pretty stupid things and aphmau calls him the accidental shitposter of gold

- Garroth and Kim dabbed to complete the ritual of joining the edge squad

2

Imagine accidentally swapping Stefan and Damons bodies while practising magic.

(This is inspired and is dedicated to the wonderful @shadyladyperfection who thought of this great idea and naturally, I just had to write it. This will be a two-parter, maybe even more, depending if I get some ideas for further parts. Let me know what you think! Happy reading my lovelies!)

Characters: Witch!Reader, Damon, Stefan, Bonnie (mentioned)

Warnings: Slightly foul-mouthed reader, terrible little jokes (does that even count as warnings? I have no idea)

Word count: 883

Your name: submit What is this?


Doing magic is hard. Really hard. Especially if you do not have any place to practice in peace. Sure, the Salvatore Boarding House you are currently residing in, has a lot of space, but your friends Stefan and Damon thought it would be best you would practise in the living room. It makes sense, because you pretty much burned your house down the last time you experimented with new spells. You found them written down in a book with your last name on it, which Bonnie found in her collection of grimoires.

So there you are, in the middle of reading this spell: “Corpora stans in conspectu meo dissimili animo et permutare lumen tuum egredientur” (translation will be revealed in the next part)

Damon: “I´m telling you, Batman would destroy Superman.”

Stefan: “No way.”

Of course they discuss this again. It has been a back and forth ever since you forced them to watch a DC Movie.

Damon: “Batman is as strong as Superman and he, unlike Superman, knows how to disguise himself!”

Stefan: “Yeah because a half-face mask is such good disguise.”

Damon: “Better than not wearing any mask at all!!”

It takes every bit of concentration for you to finish speaking the words to the spell, but you are not sure if you might have mispronounces some.

Stefan is about to throw another argument in Damons face as you finish muttering the last part of the spell, as the ground starts to shatter violently. Pictures fall on the ground, glass shatter and you, Stefan and Damon fall on the ground.

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