Maleficent is a dragon who cursed an infant because she wasn’t invited to a christening, this woman CANNOT raise a child.
Queen Griemhilde is a conceited, vain witch who killed a 14 year old because she was prettier than her, this woman CANNOT raise a child.
Jafar hypnotised the sultan, got himself turned into a magician, a genie, just for power and forced a 15 year old to be his slave girl, this man CANNOT raise a child.
Cruella DeVil is a mentally ill woman whose affection consists of derogatory comments, blowing smoke in your face and never taking no for an answer, this woman CANNOT raise a child.
So, let’s say Evie, Carlos, Mal and Jay grow up on an island without magic, surrounded by murderers, thieves, people who did bad things, people who are proud of these things. Let’s say, they don’t teach them to be evil. Let’s say, they teach them ‘don’t let anyone keep you from what you want, you are a queen, a dragon, a genie, you are magic’. Ben has dreams about a girl with green eyes and lilac hair, of a girl who is different, something fae, and he remembers the fairy who cursed his father because he wasn’t kind, so he asks his parents to let some of the villain’s kids stay in Auradon. Show them goodness.
When they arrive, they don’t arrive in a tumbling mess. They don’t even get out of the car, and when the chauffeur opens the door, there’s a stick thin girl with long blue hair staring at her hands, a muscled boy who almost isn’t a boy anymore, rubbing the bands on his arms, the girl from his dreams, eyes glowing, a little boy dressed in fur curled up in their laps.
They aren’t used to magic, even though it is in their very cores. So they take time to get used to it, to learn to live with death and power under their skin.
They weren’t sent to get a wand for world domination. They were sent to get a wand for freedom. So it takes them longer to realise just what their parents did. It takes talks and family day and Queen Leiah screaming at the top of her lungs (‘Get away from here, do not touch my grandchild, my daughter will never be mine because of you, how dare you, how dare you?’) for Mal to realise that this isn’t about invitations and pettiness. It’s about a woman with hair as yellow as gold and lips that shame the red red rose, growing up poor, in a cottage, falling to her death at the touch of a spindle, this is about her mother talking about the raven with more fondness than her, this is about all the things her mother did, no matter the reason.
Evie still studies with Doug, and she hasn’t been taught to score a prince, she’s been taught to use her beauty, it is all men want, get rid of them before they get rid of you, do NOT die. So she meets with Doug at his house and Dopey stares at her and then he gets Snow White, who breaks down crying at the sight of this thin, beautiful girl with hair in a colour that has haunted her sleep ('what did she do to you, was it not enough for her to kill me, what has she done to you’) and Evie realises that her mother’s stories are not about men, they are about this woman, about her sister, who was 14 and beautiful and dead. And this is about her and all the bones she can count when she looks in the mirror.
Jay befriends the only other Arabian speaking children he can find, plays gurney, ruthless and self centered and for him, and one day Aladdin picks his children up and Jay does one of those backflips where he stays in the air for too long and it knocks the wind out of him. Jay doesn’t understand because of Aladdin, he sees a thief, who is like him, but it isn’t what makes him think, tourney does the trick because they are a team and the world does not revolve around him, he is not the center of the universe.
Carlos knows that his mother is wrong from the moment he is old enough to master critical thinking. She shrieks and hits and worships fur and he spends his days begging for scraps. There’s no magic in him, no rush he gets from crossing the barrier, so he helps his friends. They have always been his lifeline, so maybe now he can be theirs.
AU where instead of going to Samwell, Jack starts a widely successful Publicly Broadcast show for children.
Jack learns that he is great with kids after coaching them for a little over two years. Moreover, kids are good with Jack. There is no pressure to be anything other than who he is.
It all starts with a local news program doing a fluff piece on Jack Zimmermann’s coaching ability. But then it turned into something completely different when Jack skated onto camera and started to introduce every single one of his kids and what was special about them. He was…really enchanting actually. He didn’t ever really talk down to them. Jack just treated them as a tiny friend.
They ARE his tiny friends, but that’s not the point.
The footage they got of “snack time” was really the best. Imagine a good 16 kids piled around this massive man teaching them the best way to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
It should have been obvious that a local channel would contact him. It still surprises Jack. They want him to host a show? Why? Everyone always teased him about how impersonable he was during interviews. Is it because he’s Jack Zimmermann’s son? Or Alicia’s?
Jack asks all of these questions to his mother and she just laughs. “You made a PB&J interesting to 16 kids just by being you”
It’s decided that the Eighth Years should do a Secret Santa gift exchange to continue the newfound effort towards House Unity that was started at the beginning of the new term.
So of course, because Harry can’t catch a break, he managed to draw Draco Malfoy as his person.
He’s stressed AF and wracking his brain to think of something that Malfoy would even want, something he won’t spit on.
Harry gets annoyed when Malfoy plays it off like it’s going to be super easy to get his person a gift, which makes Harry even more Determined™
Except, secretly Draco is also stressed AF because holy shit everything he thinks of is stupid, what can he possibly get the Boy Who Lived??? Fuck, fuck!
Draco trails through Hogsmeade looking at Quidditch supplies, expensive leather-bound journals, and fine bottles of goblin wine before deciding that all of those gifts wouldn’t matter to Potter — with the exception of Quidditch, obviously.
But he’s certain that gifting Potter something Quidditch-related won’t have enough of an impact.
He wanted to get a gift that meant something, something to thank Potter for saving his life.
Harry nearly gave up as the day to exchange their presents drew nearer, but then he found Malfoy’s wand in the bottom of his trunk.
He knew it was the perfect gift.
After a few false starts, Draco finally figured out something clever to gift to Potter, something that no other Secret Santa would have thought of.
He was proud of himself for figuring out the puzzle, and he’s actually eager to see Potter’s face when he opened Draco’s gift.
When the time finally came to exchange gifts in a circle around the Eighth Year common room, they each went last to give their gifts.
When it’s clear that they had presents for each other, they both nod to leave the room.
Malfoy insisted that Harry open his first.
Harry fully expected something over the top, expensive, and uselessly ridiculous.
But his breath caught when he opened the leather-bound text, engraved with a family crest on the cover with the name Potter emblazoned on a scroll in the center.
As he flipped through the pages Malfoy explained that he tracked down a complete family history of the Potters for Harry.
And holy shit, Malfoy’s present made Harry’s heart pound in his chest while his throat went all tight and dry???
Harry got choked up over his gift as the reality of it sank in. He carefully ran his fingers over the engraving while Malfoy shifted his weight from foot to foot nervously, blurting out facts about the gift that Harry only paid half of his attention to.
Harry wiped at his eyes roughly, a little embarrassed, but Malfoy gave him such an important gift.
He took a breath and held out his own gift for Malfoy.
“I thought it was about time you had this back. It served me well, so, er, thanks.”
Draco didn’t even speak for a full minute, his eyes were just locked on his wand in Harry’s outstretched hand.
Harry could see his hand shaking at his side.
When Harry finally handed Draco the wand, he hugged Harry really tightly and whispered thank you.
Draco kissed Harry’s cheek as he pulled away, startling Harry.
His lips felt so soft and warm against Harry’s skin.
They stared at each other until Harry slowly, carefully pulled Draco back to him, and lightly kissed his cheek in return.
They smiled tentatively at each other, each clutching their gifts, as they reached for each other’s hand.
Absolutely no one was surprised when they walked back into the common room holding hands.
One day in potions class, Snape makes everyone brew a potion that will draw you towards your soulmate and of course, Draco and Harry are partered to brew this together. Towards the end of class, Snape instructs the class to test out the potion and everyone starts running around all over the place, drawn towards their soulmate. Some head towards each other while most of the class clusters at the door-locked of course to prevent students from leaving, but Harry and Draco dont feel anything. They just stand there looking confused and arguing a little because Harry’s potions are absolute shit but Draco’s potions are almost always perfect and there’s no reason why the soulmate potion is not working until they see how Snape is staring at them, looking more than a little queasy and oH
Because I can, and because Kim Woo Bin’s still my #1 Kaz.
The reason Kaz doesn’t directly go up in the ranks of the Dregs? He doesn’t look like the rest of the recruits. But Kaz uses this to his advantage; he pretends not to understand Kerch for a whole year before Per Haskell and his cronies find out. They’ve been speaking in Kerch so Kaz won’t understand them, but once he starts speaking fluently as any other Ketterdam boy, they feel a jolt of unease at the discovery of how Kaz overheard and understood every one of their conversations.
The first time another boy tells him to go back to Shu Han, Kaz gets his gloves stained with blood for the first time. Since then, no one in the Dregs questions his genealogy.
Word about the Shu Kerch boy with the devil’s blood spreads across Ketterdam. One day, Heleen Van Houden pays a visit to Per Haskell, offering Kaz a position at the Menagerie and promising a much more lavish and comfortable life than the streets, since he has an “exotic factor”. Kaz looks at her coldly, and then says, “I’d rather die on the streets than suffocate in the sheets with everyone pretending not to notice, like your Zemeni girl did the other day.”
This memory pops up in his head when he sees Inej run her thumb over her Menagerie tattoo.
Speaking of Inej, she’s the only one who doesn’t ask about his ambiguous ethnicity, like it isn’t important to her. He respects her greatly for that.
Kaz sticks out as the only biracial gang leader in Ketterdam. Every new gang member wonders about this, but they all keep silent because they value their lives. Unbeknownst to them, Kaz doesn’t even know why he looks so much like the Shu, but he suspects he inherited from his mother, who’s been absent from his life since his birth.
When the gang springs Matthias from Hellgate, Matthias has even more misgivings about Kaz, since he presumes that Kaz plans to give Bo Yul-Bayur back to the Shu. Kaz shuts down these thoughts with a simple brawl that leaves Matthias sprawled out on the floor.
Unlike Inej, Jesper asks about his Shu origins. Before he can stop himself, Kaz answers shortly: “My mother.”
He can’t find himself to lie to Jesper about this, for some reason. But when Kaz sees an understanding gleam in Jesper’s eyes, he’s glad he didn’t lie.
Kaz runs into a Shu servant girl when he attempts to break into a Council member’s house for the first time. She takes one look at him and just glides on by. To Kaz’s surprise, he soon realizes that the Shu servants and help that serve corrupt individuals will willingly pretend he’s not in their masters’/mistresses houses. Some even become his inside spies.
After the chaos of Crooked Kingdom, the Shu in Ketterdam get accused of working with the Shu attackers that flew in and bombed the city in search for Grisha. Kaz steps in and acts as the voice of the Shu Kerch, confirming that none of the Shu knew about the attack and never planned something so drastic.
Whenever the Shu come to Ketterdam for a crucial business venture post CK, Kaz acts as a mediator between the Kerch and Shu delegations. Everything goes four times faster because Kaz is a better businessman than any self-respecting merch on the two delegations.
He doesn’t speak Shu at all. Kuwei tries to get him to speak it once, but fails miserably. Despite this, Kuwei and Kaz get along better than people think. When Kuwei comes back and joins in on a heist, he and Kaz pretend to be lost Shu boys who don’t speak Kerch. It works every time.
so when they start dating they and they get comfortable with each other, they’re not trying so hard to keep the gross shit away from the other as much as before (altho they didn’t really try that hard before they started dating anyway)
lance doesn’t really like it when keith picks at his own face because it always looks like keith’s in pain whenever he does (acne + dry skin= bad combo for keith)
he will however pop pimples for keith’s bacne, bc he’s a good boyfriend
he also makes a lil soothing lotion for him for keith’s dry face and hands
lance burps in his face sometimes, or he burps and blows it at keith just to fuck with him
keith: i swear if you burp one more time i’m kicking you out lance: you’re just mad because you weren’t fast enough to outrun it, babe ;)
he also gives keith dutch ovens, rip keith
they both laugh about it after tho
keith gets him back for it later in a sneak attack dutch oven
they play wrestle all cute and shit, but when they get a little more into it keith sometimes has an arm around lance’s neck and lance’s face is pretty much up in his armpit
keith’s really sweaty
you probably know how it goes
lance, shrieking: UNCLE, UNCLE, YOU WIN GET YOUR STINKY ARMPIT AWAY FROM ME
they hug each other all sweaty post a mission and honestly it doesn’t even matter to either of them, they’re just happy to see the other in one piece
when keith throws up occasionally bc of his lactose intolerance, lance will stay with him in the bathroom to comfort him
he rubs his back and ties keith’s hair up in a little bun for him so it’s out of his face
he also brings keith lots of water
they cuddle afterwards when keith is still kinda shaky but starting to feel a little better
(keith’s the little spoon here and lance is the big spoon)
morning breath kisses :/
lance: keith wait, i haven’t brushed my teeth yet keith: so? lance: my breath stinks, dude keith: it’s okay, mine does too. i just wanted to kiss you good morning lance: :’) okay
Laurens: Dear Alexander Hamilton, We’ve been way too out of touch. Things have been crazy, and it sucks that we don’t talk that much. But I should tell you that I think of you each night. I rub my nipples, and start moaning with delight!–