don't-grow

okay so my parents got divorced a few months ago. now she’s back going to church, she keeps inviting my dad to come home and have lunch/dinner, messaging him about getting back together and now he legit went to church with her and I’m desperate because if there’s one thing I’m positive about is how unhealthy their relationship always was and I don’t, I really don’t, want them back together because she ALWAYS does this. they break up, he starts to see that life can be good and succed, she gets poor and sad and asks for him to come back and since he loves her, he does and peace lasts for 2 to 3 months top and hell breaks lose again and they start fighting and she cries and keeps yelling to the world that she’s done with him, that she doesn’t love him… like??? jesus fucking christ you signed up the DIVORCE just let it go. 

2

MET @thenathanzed & HE SAID ‘DOODLESBYADZIE’!!! we were like old internet buds reuniting!! I’m so happy to have met him!

anonymous asked:

Btw Pidge, about AUs: The Kylux fandom is so huge and a lot of ppl have AUs and a lot of these AUs are really great but the thing is: it's hard to get noticed in such a huge pond. In all honesty, I felt like I wanted to leave this fandom for a while now bc nothing I do seems to matter. I know a lot of people say 'don't do it for the notes' but what's the point if you can't connect to people? (1/2)

I’m so depressed about this, tbh. I just wished I could create smth that ppl love so much that they would draw fanart or even write fics or whatever but nah it’s not happening. It also didn’t help that the kylux-positivity week blog reblogged like 90 % of artists that were already super popular in the fandom and didn’t need the publicity. I’m just sort of down about this and the only reason I’m taking this to you is bc you’re a positivity hub - sort of. Sorry. (2/2)

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ohhh man… this is one of the most difficult Asks i’ve ever received… (o   0 o) in a perfect world, i want everyone in the fandom to feel happy and loved and enjoy their time here! but i know that just isn’t how it is in reality. I’m really happy you find solace in the positive vibe of my blog though! thank you! <3 but i’m also really sorry that you find yourself feeling this way Anon, and also that i don’t quite know how to respond to this… hmmm… (=  3 =);;;

I don’t run the kind of blog that has thousands of followers, and i don’t get thousands of notes per post ~ but i DO feel loved and appreciated, and have dear, dear friends in the community! so regardless of my perceived status, i’m just here because i love being here! <3 fandom is a complicated beast and i’m only just learning about it myself. this is my very first fandom! and my very first blog! i’ve only been on Tumblr for a little over five months! so i can’t claim to have much wisdom or insight about the way things work; i can only talk about my own experience.

though… (O ___O);;; even then… my experience hasn’t been the kind of one a lot of other people CAN have. i don’t go to school anymore, and i don’t have to leave home to work for half of my week, so i have more time than the average person to devote to my art and my relationships here, which is a big part of how i started to have the confidence and inspiration to keep drawing and growing as an artist ~ and also how come the wellspring in my heart for this fandom never runs dry! what i think i might mean is… (and omg… i really hope this doesn’t sound mean, or awful, or like i’m saying you don’t work hard, or try hard ~ cuz dear gawd, that’s not what i mean!!!) you get out of the fandom what you put into it.

If you want to eat cake, you gotta have a cake to eat. You can go out and buy that cake from someone else - and it’ll be perfect, and beautiful, and you’ll enjoy the fuck out of it!!! but if you want the satisfaction that comes from eating a cake you made yourself, then you’re gonna have to not only bake that cake, but get all the ingredients, skills, and tools necessary to make it in the first place!

the “i just wanna eat cake” crowd, are the people who just LOVE the fandom! all the people who like and reblog and enjoy the works of others! they’re so, SO important to the health and vitality of the fandom as a whole! people who leave comments and thoughtful tags are the ones spurring creators into creating more! and it sounds like you’re searching for the feeling of baking a cake that everybody wants a slice of! (-^ O^-) the fulfilling feeling of creating content that people want to talk with you about! but people aren’t gonna eat your cake just because you baked it… which is the sad part… so you just have to keep making cakes over and over and over until they are either SO fancy that nobody can miss them, or you’ve made SO much cake that nobody can help but notice your passion for cake making!

(O   A O);;; this cake metaphor is making me realize that i’m starving… omg… lol lol lol XD it’s 6am! this is no time for cake! (^ ___^) i’m sorry… lol… i’ll try to be more serious… Ummmm… (O  vO) anyway… the things is… you just gotta keep doing what you’re doing. there is a rule i believe exists in the world, one that i hate because it’s incredibly exploitable… but one that is also very positive with the right intentions: “it’s not what you do. it’s how much you do it.” When you make your work, and keep on making it, and keep on making it, regardless of how people value it or don’t value it… regardless of the feedback… you just keep creating and being positive about your own experience - i think THAT is how we build the foundations for our own success and growth. My work when i first came here was NOT spectacular, and i didn’t have single follower on day one ~ just like everybody else ~ but i just kept making things, and making things, and making things, and now it’s nearly been half a year!

You know who i really admire and think is an amazing example of being passionate about the fandom no matter what? @katherine1753 !!! i ADORE her. she doesn’t get tons of notes or have thousands of followers, but she is SO passionate and SO positive! in the short time i’ve been following her work, she has already created so much and grown so much as an artist! she also gives of herself without expecting anything in return and people around her see this and want to interact with her! she gives and gives and gives to the fandom, and we are all lucky to have her, even if not everybody knows it. because you just have to keep growing and changing with positive intentions for YOURSELF, and THAT is what people find engaging! when you believe in yourself other people want to support you; and that’s the thing about this fandom! making friends is easy if you try! (^ O^) we’re all here for the same reasons!!!

now… i don’t want this next part to sound like grandstanding… ((oO ^Oo)) or like i’m trying to talk myself up… i’m just trying to say what it’s been like for me…

i don’t care about the number of followers i have or the amount of notes i receive; the core group of followers and friends who show me undue kindness and love every day, are already more than i deserve <3 <3 <3 <3 but the REAL amazing thing has been my own personal growth as an artist and how much much positivity this experience makes me feel! and i think THAT is what people follow me for. Every day i feel SO in love with the fandom, and with my own ever-changing work, and with the chances i get to talk to people! and i think others pick up on that! <3 doing what you love for YOU is what will make other people enjoy loving the experience of it along with you <3

the very first piece i posted to Tumblr was this:

character sketches for @no-hux-given ‘s high school AU! (-^  v ^-) i didn’t find her because she was running a high-profile blog, and i wasn’t making work that was seen by tons of people! i just found her by accident and fell in love with her work! and now, the experience of her friendship is one i wouldn’t trade for anything! her positivity towards my work fostered my own positivity towards my work! and it’s just grown and grown from a tiny sapling to a huge tree since then!!!

so just now i drew this:

and i think it’s safe to say that i have grown and changed a lot since that first post! (-^ O^-) and so has my blog!!! (o   w o) <3 i’ve made wonderful friendships along the way, enjoyed the kindness of strangers, and learned so much from all the wonderful and talented people around here!!! but it took a HUGE investment of time and love and never giving up!

it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows! nobody gave a crap what i made or what i did - nobody @’d me in posts or wrote about me - and that was fine! it didn’t stop me from making things! i’ve always been here for me and my own growth first. and regardless of my timeline, the fact still remains that i’ve drawn over 130 piece for this fandom, and drawn over 140 reaction selfies to interact with people on my blog. i put in time and effort and withstood the slings and arrows that come along with doing things that not everybody agrees with… but… you don’t get to eat the cake unless you make it! and if you’ve never made a cake before… the first one sure as hell isn’t going to be perfect! HAHAHAHAHAH!!! (-^ O^-)

so don’t get discouraged!!! people are right when they say “don’t do it for the notes”. no matter what fandom you go to, it will always start the same. you will always be a small fish in a big pond in the beginning! we all are! and that isn’t a bad thing! you just need to grow! and you grow and get stronger the more you do! <3 just like anything in life, you’re going to get out of it what you put in. if you put in time and positivity, other people are going to give you their time and positivity back. not right away. but eventually (-^ ___^-) building up a following and growing your blog, those are things that happen a tiny bit at a time with every piece of original content you make. so if you want to grow… you gotta just keep going! <3 <3 <3 (-^ O^-) it takes a long time! it really does! there is no easy answer and no short cut to take! but everything you do will help you to grow and change, and THAT is the really, really valuable stuff!

Good luck with all of your projects in the future! never stop doing what you love! if you don’t love it… move on to the next thing. and keep moving forward and moving forward with love, passion, and positivity!!! <3

with the moon as full and problematic as ever, juno liked to go through the crystal gardens and make sure that no one had planted any wolfsbane. the concern was real considering she’d heard of one alpha trying to buy some, and the fact that people were packing holy water and garlic on the regular now. so far she hadn’t found anything. no one really kept track of what was planted in the community garden, but juno had taken it upon herself to log as much as she could. near the entrance of the garden, she noticed a familiar, spicy, skunky smell. she stooped and picked up a five-pointed leaf that smelled so strongly she had to hold it away from her. “really?” she asked, laughing incredulously. “someone really planted this, here of all places?”

anonymous asked:

Sugamon; Namjoon finally getting Yoongi to admit his feelings for Jimin please!!!

“you think you’re slick?” yoongi hisses at a very smug namjoon after folllowing him into the bathroom of the concert venue so that they can finally talk in private.

namjoon only shrugs, not even looking at yoongi as he fixes his hair in the mirror, “no idea what you’re talking about, but yeah i guess so!”

“shut up—” yoongi lightly shoves at namjoon’s shoulder, making the younger snort, “you’ve made your damn point, you’ve been flirting with jimin all week and it’s starting to bother me—so yeah, i like him, okay? you can back off now.”

send me a pairing and au, i’ll write a three sentence fic

I just HATE how I have real, legit reasons as to why I wouldn’t want to see a R•ylo romance happen onscreen, yet that automatically makes me a bully and stupid for not seeing the “underlining themes” in TFA.  (Note that I don’t go harassing shippers or even trying to bring up the topic with them.)

Like…sorry. Star Wars is supposed to be an escape. I don’t want to watch the bad, real life elements I’m trying to escape from in the first place be glorified and romanticized in my favorite film series.