don't try and stop it

Bellamy stoic-and-calm-in-the-face-of-impossible-situations Blake loses his shit oveR LOSING CLARKE AND I AM NOT FINE.

There’s one thing I hate more than certain band members being problematic and sexist and that’s when fans defend their behavior

anonymous asked:

what do u do when u think ppl secretly hate u...??? u don't have to answer but it would be appreciated

Power through it, I suppose. I actually have a hard time really trusting people, tbh, and my natural inclination is to assume someone is lying or deceiving me in some way. I’ve never been able to turn this off, so I’m often feeling like people don’t actually like me or they’re plotting something. Its an unpleasant feeling. But I’ve kind of figured out that while I can’t stop myself from feeling this way, I can counter it with things that help relieve my anxiety.

I’m very much focused on logic and what’s rational, information and “figuring out what makes the most sense” has always been my go-to coping strategy for anxiety (like, scoping out/researching new places before I have to go there, reading up things that scare me so they’re less scary, etcetc). I’ve found I can do this with feeling suspicious that people secretly hate me, too. So I’ll feel bad about it and then make myself think about it logically. Does it makes sense for this person to harbor secret hatred of me? Does it make sense for them to keep it secret? If they really hated me, would they really still associate with me? If so, do they have to? If they don’t have to, then aren’t they just giving themselves needless stress by still associating with me? Does it make sense for them to do that to themselves? And if they are doing that, isn’t that kind of ridiculous/sad on their part? They hate me but they’re still associating with me? Should I really be upset over someone who would do something like that?

From my experience with people, and my understanding of myself, I feel pretty confident in the fact that most of the time people feel pretty neutral about things. It takes a lot of energy to hate things, at most most people will just mildly dislike you unless you did something they felt was particularly objectionable. 9/10 when I feel like someone hates me, there’s really nothing between us that would warrant hatred. So it often doesn’t make logical sense for someone to expend the energy in hating me (especially in secretly hating me). And if they really are, then they’re acting illogically and its not something I can worry about. This is especially true when I feel like people in general hate me, rather than a specific person. I can rationalize that ‘people’ is too varied of a group to all feel one specific way (I mean, ‘people’ can’t agree on general things like whether chunky or creamy peanut butter is best, I doubt everyone would agree on their opinion of me), so its illogical to dwell on that feeling.

I also figure that everyone can’t like me, and that’s OK. Sometimes people are going to hate me. I probably deserve some of that hate. But I can’t dwell on it, I have a life to live and I can’t live it for other people. For some reason, I really don’t care if people hate/dislike me, its always the not knowing that’s the issue for me (probably my need for information to not feel anxious causing that). So, if I really can’t decide whether or not someone hates me, and it seems more likely than not than they do, then I just decide that they do and act accordingly (cutting off the relationship, ignoring them, or just accepting them as a person who doesn’t like me)

I’m unsure if that method would work for you, it really depends on what helps abate your anxiety. If this doesn’t, perhaps you have another method of coping with anxiety you could adapt to this situation?

I'm not worth it anymore...

You take me for granted cuz you know I won’t leave
I’m not worth picking up the phone
I’m not worth texting back
I’m not worth those cute paragraphs anymore
I’m not worth putting effort into
… You don’t think I’m worth it. Well nether do I

one reason why i hate pmsing is because i lose 100% of my motivation and inspiration for everything. i don’t want to draw or make pixel art, don’t want to make graphics, don’t want to do web design, don’t want to watch movies or play video games, but i also especially don’t want to do nothing. it’s literally a week of empty hell and i have to experience it monthly :))