don't look in the trash can

Darkiplier: You’ll never escape. Not now, not e-

Me: Can I pet your dog?

Darkiplier: …What?

Me: Can. I. Pet. Your. Dog.

Darkiplier: …Do you know who I am? I can destroy everything you a-

Me: Did I stutter

10

By the way man, this why we work well together, you know? You see free soup, you make a decision to eat it.

2

Sure, the bedroom scene is #iconique, but can we talk about how Keith gives Lance the softest look ever in the middle of a f i g h t??

  • <p> <b><p></b> <b>Hufflepuff:</b> Do you want to see the new Beauty and the Beast movie?<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> *playing "Evermore" loudly*<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> I've seen it twice already.<p/><b>Hufflepuff:</b> So is that a no?<p/><b>Ravenclaw:</b> Are you crazy, when's the next showing?<p/></p><p/></p>
2

You are not the only woman who has felt a low spirit after the birth of her child.

2

I love the fact you can take ANYTHING and use it as a reference with Haikyuu!! stuff. I swear this is the most versatile series ever. Anyway, I saw this >> https://blackwolfartz.tumblr.com/post/158965459249/honestfictionist-joey-role-model-for-both-men this afternoon and immediately thought of this. College is rough, you eat what you gotta when you can lol Also, Kuroo is totally sitting at the counter wrapped in his blanket. And his messy just-rolled-out-of-bed look is super important. 

College AU stuff because it’s fun and everyone is doin’ it lol It’s okay, Bo. Your curves are perfect, Eat that cold pizza that probably has pineapple on it. Why else would Kuroo be making that face.? Pineapple on pizza, honestly…

okay but tater is absolutely the biggest baby ever when it comes to scary movies. we’re talking even the slightest hint of a scary scene and tater just nopes the heck out of there. like, he still can’t watch the hunchback of notre dame all the way through.

but he is definitely not going to mention that to kent. especially since he knows that kent loves that he’s so big and strong and tater’s pretty sure that ‘screams like a little girl at cgi monsters’ does not fit that description.

except it’s a date weekend and kent’s put on his netflix list of 'quintessential american films that you need to watch tater, how have you not watched these you weirdo’ and then. gremlins comes on. and tater is excited!! gizmo is so cute!! but then the actual gremlins come along and look. tater is a Big and Strong hockey player. he is definitely not scared by evil reptilian dolls. no siree.

it takes kent approximately 2.3 seconds to notice. 'babe,’ he says slowly, 'are you scared?’

'no way,’ alexei 'no pokerface’ mashkov forces out. for a second all kent can do is stare at his giant, russian teddy bear of a boyfriend before he basically lifts tater onto his lap. 'how are you this cute??’ he grins with a face of brown curls. and while tater is pretty terrified he’s also?? all warm on the inside??? because this gorgeous, talented, loving man is His Boyfriend

(that night kent is woken up by tater shaking his arm and plaintively whispering, 'hey…can I be little spoon now?’ and kent just MELTS. tater doesn’t mind scary movies too much after that.)

4

@snakepitnet event: favorite lightning era slytherin

& maybe then we can stitch our halves together || m. flint ; p.1

toasty boy with the sparkling peach lemonade ayee

(I play a super modified homebrew game called “Revenge of the Poser”, a game in which the “races” are just different types of girls. The characters are currently in a mall.)

Me: Running from the remains of the Hot Topic, you can see many scared emos, a couple of adults and an old lady.
Ditzy Trash: I want to talk to the old lady.
Me (as the old lady): Oh no, I bled all over the Doctor Who pins.
Ditzy: Did you see who blew up the store?
Me: Yes, there was a young man beside me!
Ditzy: What does he look like?
Me: At the moment, like spaghetti that hit a truck.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled blogging to bring you even more of my ridiculous obsession with the arranged marriage royalty AU. You can blame @operaticspacetrash for this monstrosity. THE HYPE IS REAL and I am trash.

(P.S. click for bigger version, I think it looks best like that.)

anonymous asked:

OMG PIDGE KEPT THE TRASH BUDDIES (Lower left corner in the scene where Pidge shows Matt her room, you can see the Lance trash buddy)

YEAH, SHE DID!! there’s also Hunk, and the caterpillar aliens, aaaaand tons of other stuff

TBH Pidge’s room is……………… a mood™

2

I remember getting my first American girl doll. I remember how much I loved her. When I went to my friends house; 4 years old, she and I would be the moms. We didn’t think there was anything wrong with that.
When I was five I met a new friend. She had two mothers. My mom was close friends with both. I didn’t think anything of it besides the fact she had TWO moms ! How lucky

When I was 10 I heard the word “faggot” for the first time. I didn’t know what it meant but I knew I didn’t want to be called that.
By the time I was 13, I knew what that meant. And I hated myself for thinking a word like that could define who I was.
I took so much time hating myself… that I didn’t love myself.

I remember waking up sobbing when gay marriage was legalized. I thought, “I finally have a chance.”
I remember coming out shortly after then to my family. I was welcomed and supported. I don’t know why I hadn’t done it sooner.

I still don’t understand how people can look at any person of the LGBTQIA+ community and think that there is a problem in learning to love another person or in loving ones self.

this pride month is a reminder to me, that even after almost two years of being out, there is still so much I can do for the other people in this community.

I hope you all stay safe and have a gay time 🌈 you deserve so much love

Bonus OT3 Drabble: Slinky

[Masterlist]

This. This is entirely the fault of @blackkatmagic and @nellynee, and this ask-post over on blackkat’s blog. Because I just cannot resist the challenge of ‘why break up one ship for another when you can have both as a healthy triad?’ So I wrote it, even though I never actually got far enough to meet two-thirds of this ship in canon, and most of the characterisation is based on blackkat’s fics (although probably not half so good as hers).

Because really, who could resist this; “Spunky young power couple seduces village creepy shut in. Everyone is confused.

OT3 for this prompt: Minato/Orochimaru/Kushina from Naruto.

“If I have to sit and listen to you gabbing on about weird obscure jutsu, then I’m going to do it over ramen, you know!” Teuchi smiled at the sound of his best customer approaching the restaurant, presumably with her boyfriend in tow. Sure enough, when Kushina pushed the curtain aside, she was preceded into the restaurant by a sheepish looking Minato. Kushina followed, pulling another man in after them by the wrist.

The redheaded jounin manhandled Konoha’s own snake sannin into the seat next to Minato, then plonked herself down in the seat on Orochimaru’s other side. “You didn’t have to sit and listen.” The man snapped at Kushina, clearly very annoyed with her. “We are quite capable of holding a conversation without you.”

Kushina scoffed at him, flapping a hand. “Please. Minato wouldn’t know what to do with you if I left the two of you alone for more than five minutes, you know.” Orochimaru failed to come up with a retort, looking baffled and irritated in equal measure.

Minato, on the other hand, turned very red and started spluttering. “That’s not- You can’t just- What are you- Kushina!” The last word came out as a whine, and Minato dropped his head against the counter.

“Don’t be such a ditz, pretty boy.” Kushina chided, and then turned to Teuchi before Minato could respond. “The usual, please, Teuchi-san! Plus whatever this awkward turtle wants.” She nudged Orochimaru with her elbow to indicate who she meant. It was a good thing she had, because ‘awkward turtle’ was not a descriptor Teuchi would ever have applied to him on his own. He started cooking up Kushina and Minato’s usual, even as he raised an eyebrow at Orochimaru.

Orochimaru ignored him in favour of glaring at Kushina. “He’ll have the shoyu tamago ramen with extra eggs.” Minato put in, recovering from embarrassment as fast as he ever did. It was a good thing he could do that, Teuchi thought, since he was dating someone like Kushina, who got a kick out of embarrassing people.

Orochimaru switched his glare to Minato. “I don’t recall asking you to order for me.”

“Did I get it wrong?” Minato asked, caught somewhere between innocent and smug. Obviously he hadn’t, because Orochimaru looked twice as likely to murder him, but conspicuously didn’t say a word. Minato beamed like the sunrise. “So, you were explaining the connection between space-time seals and blood jutsu?” He prompted brightly. Orochimaru sighed heavily, but answered with a long explanation that went entirely over Teuchi’s head. It clearly didn’t go over Minato’s head, because he was staring in rapt attention as Orochimaru talked, in a way that made Teuchi feel oddly like he was intruding on something private.

He served up their ramen, and was not surprised when Minato and Orochimaru mostly ignored theirs in favour of their discussion. He was surprised when it took Kushina several seconds to lift her cheek off her fist and stop staring at them long enough to start scarfing down her usual three bowls of ramen. She caught his look the first time she came up for air, and shrugged unrepentantly. “What? They’re total dorks, you know, but they’re my dorks now.

Orochimaru choked on his first bite of ramen. “Excuse me?” He demanded.

“Well, you are, aren’t you?” Kushina asked, smirking. “We’re a package deal, slinky; buy one get one free. If you want to get some this evening, instead of just staring at Minato like he’s a prime steak and you’re starving, you’re going to have to learn to dance with both of us, you know.” She paused, her smirk slowly unfurling into a predatory grin with far too many teeth. “Last chance to run screaming.”

The stunned look on Orochimaru’s face turned, once again, to murderous annoyance. “I think I should be saying that to you.” He hissed, leaning forward into her personal space to loom over her. Teuchi was a bit worried, although on whose behalf he wasn’t quite sure.

Kushina laughed, and shocked just about everybody when she closed the distance between them and kissed him. Minato whimpered quietly, staring at them with his mouth hanging open, while Teuchi was just trying to figure out when the world had gone insane. Kushina drew back looking infinitely smug. “Bring it on.”