don't listen to jerks

Access straw men

A lot of people are reluctant to change anything for the sake of accessibility, even if the change would be inexpensive and easy. Often, they resist even considering the possibility that there are changes they could make that would enable a broader range of people to participate.

Often, they set up access strawmen as a way to avoid negotiating access. 

Those conversations go like this:

  • The disabled person asks for a modification of some sort.
  • The resistant person ignores the actual request.
  • They instead describe something vaguely related that’s obviously unreasonable.
  • Then they insinuate that the disabled person asked them for the obviously unreasonable thing
  • They implore the disabled person to be more flexible and reasonable
  • The disabled person generally doesn’t get their needs met, and often ends up disoriented and feeling a lot of shame

An example:

  • Douglas: I can’t climb stairs. I need class to be held in a room on the first floor.
  • Roger: It sounds like what you really need is for all the buildings to be rebuilt for you. I can’t rebuild all the buildings; I have to focus on teaching.

Or sometimes:

  • Dawn: I can only read lips if people are looking at me. Can we talk about how to make class discussions work?
  • Robin: I can’t stop other students from talking to each other. Why don’t you take this opportunity to work on your listening skills?

When a person with a disability asks for an accommodation in school, work, a conference, or wherever, don’t set up a straw man to reject. Respond to the actual problem, and try to find a solution. Is there  a way to do the thing they’re asking for? If not, why not? Is there something else you *could* do that would work? Occasionally there is no good solution; more often, there is a way to make things work. When people in positions of responsibility are willing to look for access solutions and put effort into implementing them, a lot of things become possible.

anonymous asked:

This man on twitter who goes to set names Larry says he saw and heard that the little girl is Hook's daughter?

Larry?  Seriously?  I haven’t heard anything from him in ages.  Although he’s really not a fan of Jen and is a total asshole, so I wouldn’t believe a word he says.  Also, I went through his twitter and couldn’t find him saying anything like what you claim.  All he’s been saying is shit about Jen, so I wouldn’t believe anything he says.

your writing is not stupid and people who say so are jerks

This is only tangibly related to ’what if my writing is bad’ in that people have different definitions of crap. For example, did you know there’s a constant debate about the quality of literary fiction versus genre fiction? And did you know those debates are always stupid? Because they are. They are always stupid. They are stupid because people always have different tastes, and what one person gets out of this year’s Depressing Best Seller, another will get out of that same exact thing, except it’s this year’s Depressing Best Seller With Vampires. People like different things, is what I’m saying. Some people want to read Jane Austen, and some people want to read Jane Austen fighting zombies. I am not saying those two things are equal! What I am saying is there are people who enjoy either or both of those things and that is perfectly okay.

What you want to write is not inherently stupid on the basis of what it is. Don’t let someone talk you out of writing your high school drama with werewolves. Don’t let someone make you feel bad about wanting to write about your childhood. Don’t listen to people who tell you your story ideas are boring, have been done, or aren’t worth the effort. Do you want to write them? If so, then they’re worth the effort.

Write what you want to write. Sometimes this is hard! Sometimes when you tell people about your story ideas, they tell you they’re not good. They’ll give you lots of reasons, like there are already stories like that, nobody wants to read stories about people of color, young adult novels are silly, you can’t have a gay main character, etc, etc. They will have lots of reasons. You don’t have to listen to any of these reasons. You will not be happy writing what other people want you to write instead of writing what you want to write.

That doesn’t mean thinking about what other people might want from your writing is a bad thing. It doesn’t mean there aren’t valid criticisms out there.  It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t listen to those valid criticisms, even when it’s really painful to do so. But ‘you shouldn’t write about this’ - whether that this is a particular genre, a particular topic, or an event in your life - is not valid criticism. It’s bullshit. Don’t let that bullshit stop you from writing.

that sneak peek just made me even sadder about Alec’s situation bc here his dad is talking about all the unsanctioned missions he authorized and how he’s disgraced the family name when jace was forcing his hand the entire time like jace better front up I s2g

You know what really ticks me off?

When people say that I should be angry, that I should be fighting for my rights, that I should be infuriated with the white man because I am a black female.

When people say that I internalize the pain from racism.

When people assume I should be on THEIR side (pro-choice) for MY OWN OPINION on abortion because I am a woman.

I don’t HAVE to be angry. I don’t HAVE to to defend your right to have sex willingly and then destroy the life that could have been because you didn’t feel like dealing with the consequences. And while I wouldn’t want a child to have a terrible life because of a choice you made, why would I never want someone to be born, to live? To some point I stopped trying to think of a solution to the whole abortion thing because there are so many children in adoption houses and so many children with horrible parents that treat them as if they should have never existed. So you know what I support? I support people keeping their pants on and waiting to have sex until they are ready to deal with the friggin consequences. 

As far as women getting raped, that’s a case on it’s own. I don’t want to say a child belonging to someone who had sex willingly deserves to live more than one belonging to someone who was taken advantage of. So to be honest, I’m fine with there being help for those women and help for women who have their husbands or boyfriends leave, not even in the form of abortion but the form of adoption. It’s just… a very difficult situation and I get that.

But it’s the people who act like abortion is no big deal and that everyone should approve of it that make me sick. Destroying a life before it has even begun? Why? Why the hell is that ok? Why is it ok for you to open your legs or drop your pants and have sex KNOWING that you could create LIFE and then choosing not to deal with the consequences? All my life I have been taught self-discipline and responsibility. I have been taught how precious an innocent little child is, how imperative it is to raise them right and prepare them for the vicious world we call home. Why would I risk my baby the hardships of one raised in a poor home by a single mom who would have rather not had him/her at the time? Why would I risk innocent life for a few minutes of sexual pleasure?

We act like it’s OK for these young boys and girls to be having sex so they can “experiment,” we give them contraceptives to help prevent STDs and pregnancy, which is FINE by me because it does lessen the STDs and pregnancies. I don’t believe only abstinence should be taught, but it should STILL be included and have some importance behind it. For both boys and girls. Why do we think we NEED to have sex with so many different people? With all these diseases and nastiness, the risk… just why??

As far as race… just shut up. The more you try to play victim because you are a minority (and I’m talking about those rarely in racist situations or brought down by racism) the more you CONTINUE to divide us by race. Slavery is OVER, stupid people are FOREVER. You have opportunity in front of you if you take the initiative, get yo lazy behind up, and WORK FOR IT. And you know what? Things are not always going to be fair. Not for you, not for white people, not Hispanics, NO ONE. It’s just the way life is. You have to learn how to dodge the obstacles, stop blaming other people, stop complaining, feeling sorry for yourself, and live. The only way I’ve felt lower in this society is feeling less attractive than white females because they are seen as higher in some people’s eyes. And you know what? Sometimes it hurts but I GET OVER IT. Because there’s always going to be someone who looks down on you, be it skin color, intelligence level, religious beliefs… stop paying attention to what other people freaking think and live your life in the most positive way possible, avoiding negative situations that could come from risks you could take. If you’re a risk taker, I don’t care. But don’t freaking complain to me about a choice YOU made, do not blame it on someone else if it was not their fault. And if it is their fault, THEN you are allowed to be mad and get angry. If they prevent you from getting a job or getting ahead in life because of your race or your sexual preference, I wouldn’t blame you for going off on them for their stupidity.

As far as people you think have it better because they’re white or they’re a male, just freaking stop. Stop focusing on groups and focus on individuals. We are all DIFFERENT, we are unique. We find our own ways, fight our own battles, play our own cards. And yes some of us have our disadvantages, but those are not only caused by things we cannot control. Those are also caused by the choices we made. It’s up to you to change your life and prove to people that you are not defined by your sexual preference, your race, or your gender. And if you feel the need to help others get on their feet and fight for their own way, then do so. But it’s enough with the blame game, feeling lower, feeling weaker, feeling disadvantaged, and being angry at people just because they may have the same skin color or genitals or religious beliefs as the few people who made you feel bad.

I don’t even care at this point if someone wants to be rude to me because, dang it, these are my opinions and my blog.