don't let it change you

Hey to all those people telling people “ it’s not so bad, just power through the cramps” when they're on their period because it’s not an excuse to miss school/work etc.!

I had bad cramps today, but I tried to “power through it” and went to class anyways, even though my grandmother had to drive me because I couldn’t walk to the bus.

I tried to “power through it” when I started to feel like I was going to throw up in the middle of my lecture, leaving to take a walk outside in the cold to try and clear my head, even though walking made my right side feel as though it was being ripped in two.

I tried to “power through it” when I started getting cold sweat all over my body, taking off my sweater and then putting it back on two seconds later because my body couldn’t decide if it was hot or cold.

 I tried to “power through it” when spots started to appear in my vision, and just kept walking towards the exit.

I tried to “power through it” when I started to dry heave, and started walking faster.

I tried to “power through it” when my ears started ringing and the spots took over my vision and I was so so hot but shivering and my side felt on fire and twisted into knots and stabbed all at once.

I tried to power through it to the point where I collapsed in the middle of my college hallway. A stranger brought me to Outreach Services, where I lay on the floor, vomiting, for an hour until somebody could pick me up and take me home.

The school paramedics told me that I had passed out because I put too much stress on my already taxed body. My body was taxed because of hormonal fluctuations and blood loss aka my period.

Nothing like this has ever happened to me before. In the past when I’ve had cramps like this, I’ve stayed in bed and eaten strawberries and watched MASH all day.

So don’t you DARE tell me that you should “power through the cramps and do it anyways”. Powering through made me pass out. Powering through made me have to be wheeled out of the school in a wheelchair because I couldn’t keep my balance to walk. Powering through made my grandmother with osteoporosis and a tendency to panic have to come pick me up from school and help me up the stairs and almost break her hip when I started to collapse backwards on the front steps. Powering through made my 13 year old brother have to supervise me while I took a bath because I was afraid I would pass out and drown (he was super sweet about it actually; we closed the curtain and he read me Voyage of the Dawn Treader). Powering through made my mother who works to support our family pretty much on her own have to take time off work to come home and make sure I was okay.

In conclusion; If someone feels crappy because of their period cramps, leave them alone. Don’t make them do things anyways, because you might make it worse. And definitely don’t make them feel bad for not wanting to do things because of cramps; that’s the reason I even got out of bed this morning. Be nice to people on their period. Possibly buy them chocolate or painkillers. Nut don’t make them do things when they have cramps, and definitely don’t tell them “it’s nothing, power through” because cramps? Cramps can be one of the worst things you could possibly imagine.

Seriously. Fuck you all.

2

We’ll wait for you Wookie <3 (08.14.2017 - May 2019)

anonymous asked:

spideychelle prompsoal headcanons!

ahhh, hello! sorry it took me a while to write these ones. i fell asleep and also prom is such a funny thing. bUT. here are some headcanons :)

  • peter’s a bit worried about prom. not because it’s prom or because it’s supposed to be this huge high school thing that you remember for the rest of your lives.
  • that’s actually what he’s worried about
  • last time he went to a school dance? not the best experience. homecoming sophomore year was one of the worst days of his life. not only did he have to leave behind liz allan, the girl of his dreams who turned out to have a villain as a father, but he also had to fight said father and almost died while doing it.
  • he still wakes up some nights, screaming out as the building falling on top of him disappears. his screams turn to tears as he stares at the bottom of the top bunk bed and may comes in and holds him tight to her chest. it’s been over a year, but he still gets the nightmares.
  • so he’s not excited for junior prom. sue him.
  • ned’s been trying to convince him to go. the decathlon team is all planning on renting a party bus and heading over together. which, peter admits sounds fun. a part of him really wants to go. but he can’t shake this feeling that something will inevitably go wrong and his night will be ruined and the nightmares will never end.
  • and then mj asks him to prom. well, kind of.
  • it’s a boring wednesday during lunch, ned is still getting his food because he had to speak with mr. harrington after class. so it’s just peter and mj at the lunch table. (she sits across from them these days.)
  • “so, my parents have been asking me about who my date is for prom and i want them to stop, so can i just say it’s you?”
  • “what?”
  • mj groans, lifting her eyes from her book so she can roll them at peter. “my goodness, parker, for a genius you’re really dense. can you be my date to prom so my parents get off my back?”
  • and. he’s honestly stupefied. because: “wait, you’re actually going to prom?”
  • “yes, peter. i’m allowed to want to spend time with my friends, you know.”
  • “yeah, of course, i just-” he doesn’t actually know what he thought. she did go to homecoming for the last two years, so it makes sense she’d be going to junior prom. but then: “wait, is this how you’re asking me to junior prom?”
  • michelle’s cheeks tinge slightly more pink and she looks back at her book. “i told you, my parents-”
  • “i know what your parents want, but what do you want?” he doesn’t know why he asks that. mj is his friend. has been for the better part of a year. she joins he and ned on their snack breaks and movie nights and study dates. he doesn’t want her to be his date to prom. he’s not even planning on going to prom. but then
  • “i mean,” she coughs, keeping her eyes trained on her book. “i guess it would be fun to go with you.”
  • his face lights up and he smiles all bright and wide. “you want to go to prom with me!
  • “no, i don’t!”
  • “that’s literally what you just said!”
  • “shut up, parker. that’s not what i said.” and she slinks further into her seat and scrunches her eyebrows together and she’s putting her head even further into her book and she looks so adorable. and, oh. oh. he doesn’t expect the sudden quickening of his heart or the flush that rises to his cheeks. he doesn’t like mj that way. he doesn’t, he never, they’re just friends.
  • and then ned plops down into the seat next to him and peter can’t say anything further and michelle is leaving before he can answer her and he feels badly because she looks disappointed. but he doesn’t, he didn’t even think about the possibility that he could have feelings for her in that way until like five minutes ago when she asked him to prom.
  • so, when their last period of the day rolls around, he sits next to michelle and scratches out a small note, which he hands to her when their teacher starts talking about the mitochondrial dna.
  • i’d say yes if you asked me properly.
  • when she finally looks up at him, shocked, he smiles and whispers, “you have to at least buy me dinner first, mj.”
  • she shoves him lightly and then pays attention to their teacher drone on and on for the rest of the day. she seems to have a small smile on her face but she doesn’t say anything else on the matter.
  • peter wonders for a brief moment if he’s messed this up and she’s decides to just ask someone else. and he tells himself he shouldn’t be disappointed because he didn’t want to go to prom anyway. but that was before he knew mj wanted him to be her date.
  • but then at decathlon practice the next day, michelle is grilling him on russian history around wwi when suddenly she asks: “true or false. on may 8, 2019, michelle jones asked peter parker to the prom.”
  • and
  • is she for real?
  • he looks around at all his teammates, who all have their eyes trained on him. they seem to be excited, sitting on the edges of their seats. they also must surely see the blush on his cheeks.
  • “uh,” he manages to get out. “true.”
  • he hears her whisper, “oh god.” and then ned comes in (and wait, when did he leave?) and he’s carrying this big bouquet of red roses. but as ned gets closer, peter can see that there are a few white roses in the mix. and the white roses spell out the word “prom”.
  • ned hands the bouquet to michelle and she walks over to peter. she won’t meet his eye as she hands him to bouquet and opens her jacket to reveal a shirt with a “?” across the middle.
  • and, peter is shocked. it’s been one day. did she already have a shirt with a question mark on it? how did she get flowers so quickly? she told the whole decathlon team without him knowing? how did she arrange this?
  • and then, sensing his confusion, michelle sighs. “my dad is a florist. i’ve had this shirt for years. logistics aside, will you go to prom with me, you loser?”
  • peter stares at her for a few moments, dumbstruck. and then he nods his head, smile growing when he hears the decathlon team cheer. mj smiles. she smiles in a way that’s small and as if she can’t help it. like she’s tried keeping it off her face, but the joy is too powerful.
  • so peter stands up and he hugs her tightly. her arms slowly wrap around his torso and the team cheers even louder. he thinks he hears flash yell: “get a room, you dorks!” but peter doesn’t care because he’s pressed up against michelle and her hair smells nice and it feels good against his face.
  • “thanks for asking me properly.” he whispers, moving so his face is smushed even further into her hair.
  • “thanks for saying yes.” and at this peter pulls back, and michelle looks so…vulnerable. and peter wants her to know he’s not going to hurt her. that she is giving him a gift by letting her walls down with him and he won’t ruin that.
  • “for you, anything.” and michelle punches him in the shoulder and laughs, calling him a loser. but peter just smiles. because michelle jones has a crush on him and she got him flowers and he’s going to go to prom with her.
  • wait until he tells aunt may.

For some reason all I can imagine is when Combeferre admits to Courfeyrac that he likes him, Courf is so surprised and nervous and so didn’t see that coming that he just jazz hands away backwards and into a different room so he can hyperventilate ecstatically in peace and Combeferre is just bemused like that did not go as expected

4

Mystic Messenger Baehee (Jaehee) wallpapers for @otomesapphic!  💕

Happy Birthday! (a day early!) 🎂 You work so hard and do so much. I’m sorry you’re feeling so sad and down today so I wanted to give this to you a little sooner. 💕 I hope you have a good rest of the day and you feel brighter!

10

Switch place with me, Bok Gil 

Hey everyone!! How are you all? :D Hope you are doing okie! *hugs* So were on October already and what is October without our favorite and awesome holiday?! XD Here it is, Halloween theme with our cute Hero Girls!!! º\( >U< )/º Hehe, I was doing a version with the images our sweet BNHA guys, but wasn’t being much successful and then when I saw this new image of BNHA, I thanked to the heavens for this!! Hahaha! XD So anyways, I hope you like it :D *hugs you tight* Wish you all a wonderful weekend! AND TRICK OR TREAT!!! XD

So since I got over 6 notes on that post ima be posting an essay I wrote for English

The title is A Cemetery at Dusk and I’m pretty sure I went out of point completely but idc

Here it is

She had once asked me what my favourite time of day was. If I’m being honest I didn’t have one until I saw the passion with which she loved dusk. I fell in love with the admiration in her eyes when she gazed at the darkening world. I fell in love with the colors of the sky that she thought were so beautiful and the way she blushed when I told her she was even more stunning. I fell in love with dusk because it’s when I fell in love with her. Now I’m in a permanent dusk, seeing nothing but the same reddish color she loved so much, but she is not here to make it beautiful anymore.


The car slowed to a stop and I heard a door open then close, the sound harsh to my ears. Ever since Camila had died in that accident, everything had become ugly to me. Every sound, every smell, every taste; everything was foreign to me. It was as if I had not only lost her, but also my ability to see any beauty in the world.

The cool November air hit my face, causing me to suck in a deep breath of fresh air-air that Camila would never get to experience again. My mother’s arm wrapped around my waist as she guided me out of the car.

I swallowed hard, trying to dissolve the large ball of sadness lodged in my the back of my throat. My mother squeezed my hand and started leading me into the cemetery.

The steady pitter pattering sound of the rain drizzling onto the umbrella my mother was holding over our heads, contrasted with the chatter of those who had come to the funeral that I could hear in the distance. They fell silent once we arrived near them, more so out of respect to me than actual grief. None of these people had cared about Camila when she was still alive.

I could smell the soil which would soon be covering her coffin, and some flowers someone had brought as well as the overly sweet scent of someone’s perfume. I could not make sense out of anything. Everything was a jumbled up mess in my head and I didn’t know how to sort it all out. I squeezed my eyes shut to try and get rid of the too loud redness I was seeing but it was no good, the red colour she used to love, the same colour I now came to abhor, would not leave.

My mother seemed to sense my distress and led me to the tree. I knew it was the one because I had asked them to bury her next to it. I kicked myself for not having noticed what type of tree it was before. I wished I could see it, the last place I ever held her in my arms. I leaned against it just like she had. It seemed like years ago when we were here, visiting her mother’s grave after her stepmother had thrown her out.

Camila had broken down crying in front of this tree, much like I was right now. I had wrapped my arms around her and pulled her closer to me, knowing that the physical closeness would help her calm down. After a while her crying had quieted down into small sobs and I had kissed her cheek and told her it was going to be okay. I had promised to take care of her. She had looked up at me with those beautiful brown eyes and told me she loved me. It was the last time she had said it, because mere moments later she was dead. And I was blind.

I sank down into the ground, not caring that my pants were getting soaked by the wet ground. I could feel the steady stream of tears rolling down my cheeks and I could taste their salinity. The coffin was buried and everyone had left, my mother waiting for me a little while away, but I was still there. The rain had stopped and everything was quiet. The silence of the world echoed the emptiness I felt without her. I don’t know how much time I spent there, it’s not important anymore. The only thing that matters now is preserving her memory. I was going to make sure I would never forget a single thing about her. Her body is buried in that cemetery but the memory of her isn’t. It’s permanently engraved in my brain, she’s buried in my mind where I can keep my promise to her and take care of it forever.


Not a day will go by where I won’t wake up and think about how different it would be if we would not have gotten into that accident; if I would not be sentenced to a future of seeing the dusk she loved so much but not being able to see anything else. Not a day will go by where I won’t keep mourning her like I did that day in the cemetery. Not a day will go by where I don’t love her.

He Tian x Mo Guanshan -Don’t ever leave me again-

For you, dear anon! <3 Thank you for waiting for me to finish this, it took a while but I stuffed my whole heart into this. Don’t worry, it’s not just angst, there is some major fluff at the end. *wedding bells tolling in the background* I hope you enjoy!

 

Prologue

He Tian raised his fist, threatening and his eyes burning like black fire. Hate was oozing from every piece of his body, nothing else mattered besides the feeling of loss and regret. God, he was so fucking gone.

The other man stared right back at him, sinister as the night and a cruel smirk adorning his lips, wide and disgustingly wrong. Black strands of sweaty, bloody hair stuck to his prominent high cheek bones and forehead, throwing dark shadows over the top half of the face he loathed. He couldn’t stand it and rammed his hand into the mirror, breaking it into thousands of pieces, destroying his own accusing reflection, the last thing he wanted to see. A silent scream ripped his throat like one of the glass shards, his whole body felt heavy, so heavy. His knees gave in and he sacked against the wall, slowly sliding down at it, his cut hand leaving bloody prints on the white tiles. As if he’d give a fuck.


 „Tian…?“


 His lips twitched from holding back a laugh. There was nothing. The bathroom door was still open, the house still empty and he was still not…

Slowly, he leaned his head back, staring at the ceiling.

Pathetic, his father would have said. His brother would have said. And worst of all, if he would have witnessed him in this godforsaken second, he would have been of the same opinion.

It was his fault and he deserved this, if he hadn’t just been that sure of himself. Not that sure of his strength. Not that sure that everything would stay within his control. Not that convinced of his options to work out as planned.

Guanshan, his one and only weakness.

Keep reading

letters to a friend
  • aries: i'm sorry that we fought during our last year together. i miss you so much, and will always cherish our drunk days together.
  • taurus: god, you are absolutely gorgeous. your voice makes me melt. why do you always fight, even if you know you are wrong?
  • gemini: why do you keep me at arms length? why don't you let yourself really, fully connect with anyone? i understand adaptation, but sometimes it really is too much.
  • cancer: do you understand that i am not trying to hurt you? please stop fighting me when i try to see past your protective shell. i simply want to care for you.
  • leo: you even look like the sun; you radiate like nothing else. i know you love with every fiber of your being, but that is no reason to let someone take advantage of you.
  • virgo: sometimes criticism is good, but don't you think you push it? please do not try to fix me; i am not broken. i miss you.
  • libra: you push away people that actually care about you, and for what? for a sign that represents a scale, you really do not understand balance. let yourself be cared for.
  • scorpio: you do not let anyone really understand your mind and heart as a whole, and shatter yourself like glass to protect who you are. don't you think this is counterproductive? please try to keep yourself whole.
  • sagittarius: i understand the pursuit of knowledge, but sometimes you take the way you feel as a fact. you know that not everything you say is based upon factual evidence, and somehow you convince everyone that your way is the right way. why don't you try letting someone else convince you for a change?
  • capricorn: you do not let your emotions influence anything you do, which is admirable, but sometimes you need to listen to them. the world is made up of facts, but feelings make the world go 'round.
  • aquarius: why do you treat your lovers like friends? you are afraid of losing your individuality in another person, and detach yourself instead. please let yourself love.
  • pisces: you see the face of everyone who has ever hurt you on someone who really actually cares for you. i understand a victim complex, but you're not just hurting yourself by thinking this way.
Always be yourself. Never try to hide who you are. The only shame is to have shame. Always stand up for what you believe in. Always question what other people tell you. Never regret the past it’s a waste of time.  There’s a reason for everything - every mistake, every moment of weakness, every terrible thing that has happened to you. Grow from it. The only way you can ever get the respect of others is when you show them that you respect yourself and most importantly, do your thing and never apologize for being you.